by Rosie Clarke
‘Thank God you came,’ he said. ‘These books are in one heck of a muddle and it was giving me a headache trying to sort them. I half thought my father was lying when he said things were getting too much for him. He had let that scoundrel Farringdon take over too much and from what I can see so far, he’s been cheating us left, right and centre. Instead of sacking him, I should have had him arrested for fraud and theft.’
‘Is it very bad?’ Maggie asked, bringing a chair to sit beside him at the huge mahogany partners’ desk. ‘I thought he was sly when I first saw him, but I didn’t suspect he was cheating you.’
‘If Farringdon hadn’t attacked you, I might not have sent him packing,’ Colin told her. ‘That was his big mistake, Maggie – and I can only say good riddance to rubbish.’
Maggie inclined her head. ‘Yes, he was,’ she agreed. ‘I noticed his odd looks the first time I saw him, just after we arrived – but I ignored him. If he hadn’t tried to touch me…’
‘He would still be working here and I wouldn’t have discovered this fraud,’ Colin told her. ‘It is a few hundred pounds so far, but had I not come home he could have ruined father in time.’
‘It was good that you did,’ Maggie said and smiled at him. She felt a warm glow inside as he looked at her. No miracles had occurred. Colin’s legs still refused to take him more than a couple of steps but he could stand now and move his feet a little in the chair and with the minimum of help could move from his chair to his bed much more easily. His exercises had made him so much stronger.
‘That is all down to you…’ Colin replied. ‘You gave me the courage to come back here, Maggie. I couldn’t have done it without you. You’ve cured me.’ He grinned as she couldn’t resist a glance at his legs. ‘No, I haven’t learned to walk overnight, but I am getting some feeling back in the right leg – but I meant you’ve cured my soul. I was bitter and angry and I saw no point in life, but now I do. I’ve realised that life is worth living, even in this chair.’
‘Good,’ Maggie leaned forward and kissed him. ‘I might help more with the books if you let me, Colin. I’m good with figures.’
‘You’re good with everything,’ he replied and looked at her in a way that made Maggie laugh. ‘But I’m damned if I’m going to spend all day working – do you realise it is our anniversary?’ He grinned as he saw the expression in her eyes. ‘We’ve now been married more than two months – and I think we should celebrate with a walk and then a bottle of wine with our meal.’
‘I agree,’ she said. ‘Let’s put our coats on and go for a walk.’
‘Well, you’ll walk and I’ll ride in the chair.’ He smiled. ‘We could get someone to drive us into town this afternoon and I’ll buy you a present… what would you like?’
‘I don’t know – a box of bon bons?’
‘A real present,’ Colin insisted. ‘What do you like, Maggie – diamonds, pearls or rubies?’
‘I like pearls,’ she replied honestly, ‘but there is something I should like more than a pearl necklace…’
‘What?’ He frowned slightly. ‘Tell me…’
‘There is a family in the village,’ Maggie said. ‘Three sons went away to war and only one has returned and he is injured. He needs a better wheelchair than the one the hospital gave him… could we buy him one like yours? It is lighter than the hospital’s chair, it can be pushed easily and you can wheel yours yourself.’
Colin looked at her, eyes glinting dangerously. ‘What is this soldier to you?’
‘Nothing. I’ve never seen him – but his mother came to ask my advice. She thought the hospital might get her a better chair, but they said they can’t afford it and she wanted to know how to get a chair like yours, but when I told her how much they were she cried, because she doesn’t have forty pounds.’
‘It’s a hell of a lot of money to give away,’ Colin said, ‘but the poor devil deserves it and if it’s what you want – go ahead and buy one for him. I’ll see you have the money.’
‘Thank you – it’s so kind of you to indulge me.’
Colin gave a short barking laugh. ‘Indulge you…’ He shook his head. ‘We’d better go down to the village and take a look at this wounded soldier to make sure we get him the right size of chair. Some of these farm fellows are twice the size of me.’
‘Yes, that’s a good idea,’ she said and kissed him. ‘What a lovely husband you are – you spoil me with your presents, Colin, but it is nice to help others.’
‘Yes,’ he agreed and smiled at her. ‘It is – and trust you to think of it, Maggie. It must be the reason I love you so much.’
Maggie’s heart caught. He had spoken lightly, but he had never said he loved her before. Was he feeling the way she did about him inside? They had married because it suited them both, but Maggie knew she was happy and Colin certainly seemed to be too.
‘We’ll tackle the books this afternoon after our walk,’ she told him as they fetched their coats from the hall stand, wrapping up before they went out into the cold December air.
The estate had strung some lights in ancient fir trees in the grounds giving it a festive air and she knew the tradition was to give the staff a big Christmas party on Boxing Day. The family would have a party for friends on Christmas Eve, which was just a few days away now, and spend the day alone, enjoying the fat goose Cook had hanging in her larder, along with pheasant and cockerels in preparation for the party.
The air was crisp and cold, but the rain had held off for a while and it made the footing solid and easy for Colin’s chair to move safely on the paths that criss-crossed the gardens and grounds as they set off for the village. The news for that anxious mother was perhaps the best Christmas gift she would receive that year and they were both eager to deliver it.
It was on the return from a pleasant visit with Mabel Blake and her son James, both of whom Colin remembered from his childhood, that they met Charlotte. Colin had spent a good hour discussing the sturdiness and the merits of a good chair with James, while Maggie ate home-made jam tarts and sipped a little gooseberry wine. She had enjoyed her wine and the sweet tart and been promised the recipe for the wine before they left to walk home. It was quite a long way and she had pushed his chair for most of the time when they saw Charlotte approaching.
‘I bring a Christmas invitation,’ she cried brightly. ‘Let me push Colin’s chair, Maggie. You look exhausted and I want to ask him a question, just walk on ahead for a little…’
Maggie hesitated. Charlotte tended to think she could just take over whenever she chose to appear. ‘I can manage—’ she began, but Colin cut her off.
‘Let Charlie push me for a while. Go on ahead, Maggie. I’d like to talk to Charlie in private for a moment.’
The look on Charlotte’s face reminded Maggie of a cat that had knocked over a cream jug and scoffed the lot. Colin had been cold to her for a start, but she’d persisted with her invitations and little gifts for both him and Maggie. Maggie now saw that he was smiling; he looked as if he was enjoying Charlotte’s attention as she bent over his chair to whisper in his ear.
Maggie stuck her head in the air and walked on ahead. Earlier, she’d thought Colin might have begun to truly love her – as she’d long since realised she loved him, but now she thought he was just grateful.
Walking on ahead, she went into the house and ordered tea for three and was not in the least surprised when Charlotte continued to flirt with Colin throughout the meal. Colin’s father came in later and she sent for more tea, crumpets and cake and still Charlotte kept talking and laughing. Colin’s father talked and smiled, clearly content and not aware of any tension, and then went off to see one of his staff.
In the end, Maggie excused herself and made a strategic retreat to talk to Cook, who liked to be visited before dinner so that she could explain her menu for the evening and be complimented. In truth, Maggie had never tasted such delicious food, which was a revelation. Many country houses suffered from dreadful cooks and did so in silence because they were luck
y if anyone stayed – but Colin’s father’s cook was wonderful.
A middle-aged woman, who had started out as a kitchen maid and risen to a place of importance in the house, Tilly, as Colin called her, doted on him and did her best to provide all his favourites. The shortages of food suffered in the big cities and towns, because of the war, were not felt so much here and they always had a ready supply of produce from the walled gardens and the local farms who leased the family’s land. They were largely self-sufficient and Maggie enjoyed the fresh fruit and vegetables, though much of the fruit had been bottled in the kitchens in the autumn. She could imagine what it would be like to have fresh strawberries, raspberries and gooseberries every day in season. For the moment there were apples from the barn loft, plenty of root vegetables and fresh greens, brought to the house each day, along with flowers like chrysanthemums and the occasional rose that still lingered in sheltered spots. Maggie had been astonished at finding they still had a few clinging on in December, though the roses would be pruned on a mild day to allow for a healthy growth the next year. Meat and poultry came from the local farms and also game, like hare, rabbit and pheasant, was often served in the evenings.
‘I thought we’d have a nice beef pie with mushrooms,’ Cook told her. ‘I’ll make a sticky toffee pudding afterwards. It’s one of Master Colin’s favourites.’
Maggie chatted to her for a little longer, suggesting that they might have salads and cold meats in the middle of the day. ‘With him being in the chair all day we don’t want him to put on too much weight,’ she explained. ‘You play an important part in keeping him as well as he can be, Cook.’
‘Well, I’m glad you told me, Mrs Morgan. I want to do right by him – and you. We all wondered what you’d be like afore you came – but anyone can see that you think the world of him.’ She frowned and shook her head. ‘Them as said you’d got your hooks into our Mr Colin are wrong… and so I shall tell her next time!’ Cook’s voice rose in indignation.
Maggie had no need to ask who had said such things to the staff. She already knew Charlotte intended to make life uncomfortable for her. ‘Yes, I do think the world of him,’ Maggie said. ‘Why don’t you and the others call me Maggie? I’d like that.’
‘I’ll call you Mrs Maggie if you like,’ Cook offered. ‘I’m Tilly to you, just like I’ve always been to our Mr Colin.’
Maggie thanked her and made her way back to the library. She hoped that their visitor would have gone, but, as she approached, she heard Charlotte’s raised voice.
‘Why can’t you see what she is, Colin?’ Charlotte was demanding. ‘Don’t be fooled by the demure air of hers. She is just after your money.’
‘That is your opinion,’ Colin answered. ‘I know you hate anyone taking something you think of as yours – but you threw me over. You made it quite clear you didn’t want to be tied to a man who couldn’t take you dancing or off to London whenever you felt like a visit to the theatre!’
‘I’ve apologised for that,’ Charlotte said, a wheedling note in her voice. ‘You know what I am, Col. I say things off the top of my head and then regret them. I love you. I want us to be together – I want to be your wife…’
‘I have a wife,’ Colin said. ‘I’m afraid you left your apology a little late.’
‘But you know you adore me,’ Charlotte replied. ‘You couldn’t leave me alone last time you were home. You’ve been running after me for as long as I can remember. You can’t want that common little money-grabber… you know you still want me. I’ve seen it in your eyes.’
Maggie’s eyes stung with tears, but she lifted her head proudly and entered the room before Colin could say anything else
‘For your information, this common little money-grabber isn’t interested in money,’ she said, looking at Colin and not Charlotte. ‘Nor would I hold you to something that didn’t suit you, Colin. If you wanted to be free, I would give you your freedom…’
‘Maggie! Don’t—’ Colin said, but she turned away.
She would go up to her room and leave them to sort it out. If Colin decided he would rather have Charlotte, then he must be free to follow his heart. Maggie knew little about divorce, but she was sure his family would have a good lawyer.
‘Come back…’ Colin called, but Maggie went out, along the hall and up the stairs.
Downstairs, the sound of angry voices could be heard faintly in the kitchen. Maggie might have heard them in her room too, had she not been so lost in her distress, though everyone in the house must have heard the angry slam of a door as someone left a few minutes later.
Maggie was weeping on the bed, her back turned to the door when it opened and someone came in. For a moment there was silence and then Colin’s voice said, ‘Why are you crying, Maggie? Don’t cry. I hate to hear a woman crying – especially you…’
Maggie raised her head, wiping away her tears. ‘Sorry. You weren’t meant to witness my silly tears. I thought you were with Charlotte…’
‘Do you think I’m a glutton for punishment, Maggie?’ Colin asked in a strange voice. ‘I’d have to be stupid to throw away what I have with you for a cold bitch like that!’
Maggie heard the annoyance in his voice and a reluctant smile came to her lips. ‘Men are stupid over women sometimes,’ she said. ‘I thought…’
‘I know what you thought,’ he snapped irritably. ‘It’s obvious you thought I was still so besotted with her I wouldn’t know what she was after. Her father had already told me that he’s in trouble for losing a rich client’s money in a risky investment – and she was let down by a man she thought wanted to wed her. Someone with more money and a rich lifestyle apparently. I know Charlie too well so I played her along so that I could teach her once and for all. You should have waited a few more minutes, Maggie, and heard me tell her what I thought of her. She thought she would settle for second best – a man in a wheelchair she could cheat on as often as she pleased, who would give her a decent home and all she wanted in a material sense. She could have got her kicks elsewhere… just as I suspect she always did…’
Maggie wiped the tears from her cheeks as she sat forward. ‘I know it’s true, but I wouldn’t have put it that strongly. Perhaps she cared for you once…’
‘Charlie only ever cared for herself, but I didn’t mind that. I wanted her and she used that to keep me dangling… but that was before she threw me over.’
‘I thought you still wanted her – in your heart…’ Maggie stared at him as his eyes suddenly lit with fire.
‘As I said earlier, I’m not that much of a fool.’ His gaze was intent on her face. ‘What I can’t make out is why you care so much?’
‘Of course, I care—’ Maggie faltered and flushed. ‘I know you didn’t want a proper marriage, Colin. If you hate it that I love you, I could leave…’
‘Do you mean it?’ he asked hoarsely, ignoring her last statement. ‘I thought at first you were just being kind giving me pleasure, but then…’
‘I love you, Colin,’ Maggie said quietly. ‘I love you in a way that I thought I never could again.’
‘Thank God for that,’ he said and she saw his rueful smile. ‘I was afraid to tell you how much I adore you, my beautiful Maggie. I never want you to leave me. I know it isn’t fair to you – I can’t give you all you need in some ways, but I do love and need you.’
‘Then I have all I want,’ she said, ‘and I think your condition will get better in time. We can see a specialist, Colin. I’m just a nurse, but we’ve both seen signs of movement in your right leg and your toes twitch. It may be that the feeling is beginning to return. That doesn’t mean you will walk again, but it may mean things are a little easier for you.’
‘Yes, I’ve noticed other things too…’ He grinned. ‘Maybe in time I will be the husband you deserve, Maggie darling.’
‘You already are.’ Colin nodded as she reached for his hand. ‘We’re happy, aren’t we?’
‘I am and it should only get better - now Charlie knows that
I love you and I’m not in the least interested in her.’ Colin kissed her hand. ‘I’m sorry if you thought I was encouraging her, but I had to make her understand and until she made her play, I couldn’t. I didn’t mean to hurt you, Maggie, I just wanted to let her put her head in the noose.’
‘Oh, Colin,’ Maggie’s tears spilled over. ‘I wasn’t sure how you felt…’
‘I truly love you, Maggie. If I could make love to you the way I want, I should be the luckiest man alive,’ he said, ‘but even if I never have more than we do already, I’m happier than I ever expected to be.’ His fingers tightened around hers. ‘Promise you won’t ever leave me, Maggie. I should want to die if you did…’
‘I’m not thinking of leaving you,’ she replied and bent down to kiss him. ‘I consider myself lucky to have you.’
‘He wants you,’ Colin said, a flash of jealousy in his eyes. ‘The man you kissed in the rose garden at the hospital. He told me I should let you go… that I was selfish to hold you. I am selfish, Maggie, I know that, but I refused.’
‘Mick had no right to say that,’ Maggie said. ‘He was kind to me and helped me when Tim died, but it never came to anything and when I needed someone to bring me back to life he wasn’t there and you were.’
‘I did nothing,’ Colin stared at her.
‘You argued with me, made me angry, made me laugh… made me realise that life was still good,’ Maggie said and smiled. ‘It was all I needed and became more than I could ever have expected, my dearest one.’
‘Then I’m glad,’ he said and gripped her hand. ‘I’ve been afraid you might wish you’d gone with him…’
‘No, I haven’t wished that,’ Maggie told him. ‘Perhaps if he’d spoken in France, it might have been different but he didn’t – and then I was so ill and you came into my life and made me feel again.’
‘Do you think you should write to him… tell him?’ Colin looked at her anxiously. ‘He does love you. Even I could see that…’
‘I don’t think a letter would help. If he is hurting, I might make it worse.’