She looked at me, her eyes wet. “Is that true?”
26
Izzi
John looked conflicted. “That was how I felt at the time. It was how I felt for a long time. Losing Laura in childbirth was the hardest thing I’d ever one through. And I was honestly afraid. I was afraid of loving someone else and losing them again, just like I had with Laura.”
He took a deep breath. “I know that some people assumed it was for Laura’s sake. That I had a special sort of loyalty to her. But I know Laura. She was a lovely woman, and she would want me to marry someone else if that person truly made me happy. She would never want me to be miserable for her sake. It wasn’t for her—it was for myself. I didn’t know how I could put myself through all of this again.
“And then with Angelica… I love her and I’m glad she lived but it was tough to be a single parent and, in the process, I built a world that was just the two of us. There wasn’t really room for anyone else and the idea of expanding that world to let someone else in didn’t even really occur to me. Not until… lately… when I realized that—that our world really was small. Perhaps too small.”
John looked away from me, upwards, like he could see Angelica asleep in her bed. “Angelica’s getting older and she needs more people than just me in her life. I need to expand our world.”
“You need more than just her, too,” I pointed out. The hope in my chest felt so big and buoyant, I had to struggle to keep it down. “You have needs besides your daughter.”
John nodded. “I’m starting to realize that,” he admitted, his lips quirking upward in amused self-chastisement.
Finally, he was opening up to me. Finally, it seemed that he was giving the idea of us a chance.
I walked over to him, my heart pounding, and sat on the edge of his desk next to him. I took his hand. “I’m sorry if I ever gave you the impression that this is casual for me. Or that it’s just sex. I don’t want you to ever think what Penny did about my intentions. My intentions towards you… are really serious. I’ve had feelings for you for years.”
“And I understand that this isn’t easy for you. It’s easy for me, I don’t… I didn’t want to be with anyone else. I never fell in love with anyone else, I never lost someone that I was in love with, I don’t have a kid to think about.”
Or, well, I did now, but that child was still just a fetus inside of me, and John didn’t know about that yet. It was different, and a discussion that we’d have later, depending on how he reacted to my information now.
“I knew for years that you were the man that I wanted. And it’s because you’re a good man.” I grinned. “No pun intended.”
John chuckled, as if he was amused in spite of himself.
“You’re such a good father. You’re caring. You’re a good leader and you keep an eye out for people. You’re principled and firm. I’ve never met anyone that could compare to you. Why do you think I was still a virgin when we had sex the first time?”
John winced. “I never—I worried about that. That I was hurting you, that I’d taken things too quickly—it felt wrong for me to be your first sexual experience with another person.”
“I wanted it to be you. I knew that you were the man for me and I’m not the kind of girl who settles for less.”
John smiled fondly at me. “No. No, you’re not.”
“You’re the only man I’ve ever wanted. You’re the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.”
I could see that John was struggling with this information. I couldn’t blame him. It was a lot to take in. I gently took his face in my hands and turned him to face me.
“And if you don’t feel the same way, or if this is too much for you, I understand. But I think that you’re ready for someone else in your life. I think you’re ready for a new partner. And I want to offer myself as that person. I love you, I’ve loved you for years, and I know there’s no better man out there for me.”
“And if you need some time I understand that too. This might take a while, you might want to go slow or need to adjust. But I hope that you’ll eventually be able to consider me one of your loved ones.”
John stared at me for a long moment. I had to work not to hold my breath. What would he say? Was I going to be too much for him? I could understand that a person telling you they’d waited for you, that they were in love with only you all this time, could be overwhelming. Perhaps even a bit concerning. But I hoped that he would welcome it. That he would see what we could be together.
Just as I was starting to fear that I was wrong, that John was going to reject me—he leaned in and kissed me.
I couldn’t help myself. I burst into tears.
John chuckled a little, but in a fond, endeared sort of way. “None of that, sweetheart, none of that.”
He wiped my tears away with his thumbs. I smiled in spite of myself. This tender, loving care, was all that I’d ever hoped for from John, and all that I wanted to give him.
I couldn’t say that I was completely surprised when he leaned in and kissed me. That seemed to be where things were headed. But it still took my breath away. This was actually happening. My years-long dream might finally be coming true.
He kissed me so softly, far softer than he ever had before, his fingers trembling against my skin.
This was how I had imagined it, so many times alone in my bed. The tenderness and emotion behind every press of his lips against mine. I dared to wrap my arms around his neck, and John to my surprise and pleasure just pressed closer rather than away, his arms coming around to my waist.
God, yes. I shuddered a little against him and got up onto my tiptoes, changing the angle of the kiss. John deepened the kiss in response, his tongue sliding across my bottom lip in invitation, and I opened for him immediately, gasping as the tip of his tongue slid in and out of my mouth, teasing me, going in a little deeper each time until he owned me.
At last, we pulled back for air, the both of us gasping. I never wanted to leave his embrace.
John stared down at me, with such affection in his eyes that I wanted to burst into tears. This was how I had always dreamed of him looking at me. Could it really be that he loved me too? That he was letting himself show it at last?
“Come with me,” he murmured, and my heart leapt.
John took my hand, securely interlocked our fingers, and led me out of his home office and upstairs. My heart was pounding as I followed him. I had never been into John’s bedroom before, and now here I was, going into the inner sanctum. His most private place.
I could hardly believe this was actually happening. We stepped into the room and John didn’t bother turning on the light. The curtains were still open, presumably from when he’d let the light in this morning, and so moonlight spilled over the floor and across the bed. It made it all seem so much more romantic and soft.
John pulled me into him immediately after he closed the door behind him. I smiled as I watched him flip the door lock. It was the sort that was unlocked merely by turning the handle on the inner side of the door, so no time would be lost if Angelica had a nightmare or there was some emergency, but we would have time to cover if Angelica somehow heard something and got up to investigate.
We kissed again, still soft, but this time with more of a purpose, less exploratory. I knew what I wanted to do this time—each time before, I had let John take the lead, and I’d had no problem with that since I was the inexperienced one here.
But now, I wanted to show him my devotion. I wanted him to know just how much I wanted him. I wanted him to see that I was as eager about this as he was, and I wanted him to know how sexy I found him, and just what I’d been thinking about doing to him.
I reached down as we kissed, my fingers finding his pants and undoing them with ease. I had read once that the sign of a well-tailored pair of pants was that there was no need for a belt, and these pants definitely hung well on John.
“Izzi,” John murmured, my name on his tongue making me shiver. “You�
�”
“Shh.” I wanted to do this for him.
I sank to my knees and licked my lips as I drew his cock out of his pants. I had longed for this for years, dreaming of it. His cock was thick, already half-hard and curving up towards his stomach. I took it in hand at the base and licked at it experimentally.
John groaned softly. His fingers wound through my hair, careful not to tug.
“You can pull on it, if you want,” I told him.
John made a noise as though I’d gut-punched him and tightened his hold on my hair. I licked up and down his shaft, getting a feel for it. It twitched in my hand, the skin soft and velvety. I pressed my lips to the underside and sucked, and John swore quietly.
I wished that Angelica wasn’t across the hall so that he could be as loud as he wanted. Perhaps another time. We could get a hotel room and really make use of it.
The thought made me shiver and I took the head of his cock into my mouth, sucking on it. I could taste the salty precome on the tip and moaned, taking more of him into me.
John panted above me, shaking as he struggled to say still. I could tell he wanted to thrust into my mouth, and part of me wanted him to do that too, but I was grateful he stayed still. I was enthusiastic but I was also new to this and I would hate to choke because I tried to bite off more than I could chew.
Metaphorically speaking.
I worked myself down further and further onto his cock, using my hand to stroke what I couldn’t quite take in. His cock was so thick and heavy on my tongue, filling up my mouth, and I loved it. I loved hearing his stifled noises, feeling him twitch against the inside of my cheek, and knowing that I did this to him. I drove him to madness like this.
At last, I pulled back—I didn’t want him to come inside my mouth, at least not this time. I looked up at him through my lashes.
John stared down at me like he wanted to devour me whole. I shivered.
“Please fuck me,” I whispered.
And oh, he proceeded to do exactly that.
27
John
I gently picked Izzi up and tossed her lightly onto my bed. She giggled, her lips swollen and spit-slick. God, she had felt so good around my cock, so tight and soft, I’d wanted to come so badly.
But I was glad I hadn’t. Now I could fuck her.
The way she begged me so nicely, her big eyes peering up from beneath those lashes—how could any man resist her?
The moonlight lit her up like a damn oil painting or something, making her look like a goddess. I couldn’t want to get inside her.
Izzi spread her legs for me and bit her lip in anticipation. My cock, already so fucking hard and ready to go, twitched with need. God, I wanted her so fucking badly.
I crawled onto the bed, my hands sliding up her thighs. She was gorgeous. Beautiful. And all mine. I had fought so hard not to admit how I felt about her—and now it seemed I was ready to set all those things aside. In these soft hours of the night, anything seemed possible, and the only thing that mattered was how much I felt for her.
How much I loved her.
I couldn’t say that out loud, though. Not just yet. Soon.
For now, however—I could make love to her.
I pressed Izzi down into the mattress and kissed her, my hands skimming all over her body. She was so beautiful. I wanted to see all of her.
“C’mere,” I purred, and I rolled us so that she was on top this time. My fingers found where she was wet and aching, and the idea that she had gotten that way just from blowing me had me nearly coming untouched.
Izzi sank down onto my fingers with a little sigh. Only a few times of having sex with her and she was already tuning into my touch, her body used to it and welcoming it, getting loose and ready for my aching cock.
I scissored my fingers, making sure she was really ready for me, brushing my thumb against her clit to tease her and send her spiraling higher. She was flushed all over, a perfect, delectable sight, and I pushed myself up to sitting so that I could mouth at her breasts and her neck, finding all those little spots that made her whimper for me.
God, I’d have to get Angelica out to a friend’s for the night sometime so that I could really make Izzi scream. Take my time with her and get her to moan my name so loudly it could be heard throughout the entire house.
I slid my fingers out of her and helped Izzi position myself on her cock. She looked eager, sliding down onto it in one smooth glide that had me clenching my teeth trying not to completely lose myself. Fuck, she felt so fucking good, all of my cock inside of her sweet body, buried entirely in that slick welcoming heat.
“Yeah, that’s it, baby,” I murmured, encouraging her. “Get good and comfy.”
Izzi shot me a playful glare, because, well, there obviously wasn’t anything comfortable about her current position.
But then she started to move on top of me, and I just about choked on my own damn spit.
It felt so fucking good. She was taking me in all the way, at first moving with hesitance as she got used to it, but then fucking herself up and down on my cock like it was the best goddamn ride she’d ever been on. Her breasts bounced with her movements, her hair falling all down around her shoulders, and I could hardly breathe with how fucking sexy and gorgeous she looked.
“Oh…” Izzi gasped, making these little desperate noises as she moved on my cock, like each thrust was forcing the sounds out of her. “Oh, oh, oh!”
I pushed my hips up into her and she had to clap a hand over her mouth to keep from getting too loud. Hell yes. At this angle, I could get nice and deep into her every single time and drag right up against that perfect spot inside of her, and in no time she was flying over the edge.
Oh, fuck. I was never going to get over the feeling of her orgasming around me—I came hard, already so on edge from the blowjob and her on top of me, enveloping me, and I swore I could see stars.
Fuck. I had never come so hard before. I just about went boneless as the ecstasy swept through me, overcome.
Izzi collapsed against me and nuzzled into my neck, and for a moment, there was nothing but warm, comfortable silence between us. I never wanted it to end.
I held her close, as if she would float away from me if I let go of her, or held her too loosely.
“Penny wasn’t the only one who came to talk to me,” Izzi said softly.
I tensed in spite of myself. “I think I know who.”
Izzi nodded. “Dad was furious. I was—shocked that you’d told him.”
“You have every right to be angry at me for that. I shouldn’t have blurted it out. I was an idiot. But we were on the topic of my love life and I felt like it was the best chance I’d get.” I paused. “I told him that I had feelings for you and that you were someone I could see myself with.”
“That was what I’d hoped you had said,” Izzi confessed. “Even though Dad didn’t put it that way. He acted like you’d bragged about bedding me, but I knew that wasn’t the case.” She paused. “I was upset that you had told him without warning me ahead of time. That felt unfair. But I understand that sometimes these things just come out. And I’m also glad because—it gave me hope.”
“Oh?”
I looked down at her, curious. Even in the darkness of my bedroom, with only the moonlight to see by, I could tell that Izzi was blushing.
“Before… I thought that there was no way you would ever consider us together. After what you said at the conference, and then that time in my father’s office—I was getting such mixed signals and I didn’t know what to do. I’d given up hoping. And then my Dad came over and I knew that you wouldn’t have said anything if it was really all in the past for you. Or even if you needed to clear your conscience, Dad would’ve talked about it differently. He would’ve been talking about how what we’d done was a mistake and he was glad it was over but that—oh I don’t even know how to phrase it, I just know that he was talking about us as if we were still a possibility and that was why I came over here.”
Izzi paused. “I was upset, but then Angelica distracted me, and I was able to calm down. And I realized that before I talked to you about Dad, I needed to tell you about Penny. Because if we talked about Dad first and got into an argument, I wouldn’t get the chance to warn you about her, and that should be my first priority. So that no matter what happened between us afterwards, you’d be aware of her behavior and you could… well, I’m not sure ‘handle’ is the right word…”
“No, it’s the perfect word.” I would be handling Penny all right. I didn’t know how exactly, how when, not just yet. But I would. Eventually. Taking care of Izzi and our relationship was my first priority.
We might actually be able to make something work between us.
It wouldn’t be easy. I knew that. I had no illusions about this going to be a walk in the park. But after all of this time telling myself that it could never work, that it was wrong, that it wasn’t even something I should consider—it felt like such a relief, an immense weight off my shoulders, to just admit that this was something I wanted. I wanted Izzi. Not just physically. I wanted to be with her.
And that gave me the drive to try and figure out what we should do next.
“I know we have a lot going against us,” I told her, stroking her hair. “But we’ll figure out what to do at work so that things are fair, and we’ll work on Garrett. Between the two of us we’ll find a way to get him to accept us.”
“Maybe we could find some way so that there’s no direct chain of command from you to me,” Izzi suggested. “I know that people won’t like it if I’m working directly under my father, but people already make assumptions about me since I’m his daughter and I’m at the company, so it won’t really be anything new. And that way you won’t be my boss in any capacity.”
The whole reason that the chain of command went up to me from Izzi was so that we could try to avoid more claims of nepotism like we’d have if Garrett was her boss (or, technically, her boss’s boss). But we’d been battling nepotism this entire fucking time, whether or not Garrett was the direct line, and frankly dating your boss was a lot worse than being his daughter if you asked me.
Daddy's Best Friend (Forbidden Temptations) Page 17