A Side Order of Deception

by Constance Barker

“Well, half an order. We split it.”

  It was difficult not to roll my eyes. The chef came out with an enormous family-sized platter of spaghetti with six meatballs for us – I got one of them – and the owner picked up the check too.

  “That’s right, you poor man. What was I thinking? Babs! Add a double order of ham and potatoes to that order please. And bring Brody a basket of fries while we’re waiting.”

  “Oh – and a chocolate shake would be nice,” he said with an expectant smile.

  “I got it,” Deloris said, heading for the ice cream freezer.

  “Anything else...sweetheart?” I batted my eyelashes slowly.

  “Oh, no thanks, Mercy. I had a little snack before I came over.”

  “Okay, then! So, Brody, it looks like Drench went in and started that fire to destroy all the deeds so he could claim Paint Creek for himself. Doesn’t it?”

  “That does seem like a logical conclusion, Mercy, but...”

  “But, what! Brody, he was in the office where the fire was, and now he’s claiming he owns everything! What more do you need?”

  “Mercy, I was sitting right over there telling you about the fire in the archive room when Junior and Miss Cheswick came in here with that rusty tin box. The Drench deed was found after the fire had already happened, and it was published in the paper the day after that. It would be hard to attribute that motive to him, since he didn’t know about the deed. Nobody did.”

  I didn’t know why, but I knew that Brody had to be wrong. I couldn’t prove it, but the future of Paint Creek and all of my friends depended on me uncovering the truth.

  “Start by proving he started the fire, Brody. I’ll take care of proving that his land grab is a total scam.”

  Chapter Ten

  It was a crazy week. Everybody in town got a letter from Drench’s lawyer.

  I was sitting at the big table with Ruby. “My letter says that I have to pay him $50,000 in cash, or be out of my house in 30 days, Mercy! What am I going to do?”

  “Everybody in town got the same letter, Ruby. I got one for my house and one for the diner.”

  “They make it sound like it’s a really good deal, being able to buy our own property for that ‘special price,’ but they might as well be asking for a million dollars. I still owe the bank for my mortgage too.”

  “Don’t worry too much, sweetie. Mayor Finster got a judge to put a temporary stay on any action until a court could decide if Drench’s claim is valid. It’s never going to stand up in court.”

  “I hope you’re right, Mercy. Look around the dining room – everyone is quiet and nobody has a smile. This whole mess has put a dark cloud over the mood here in Paint Creek.”

  “I know. It’s going to be hard to concentrate on my rodeo ride today.”

  Brody walked in and sat down with us. He smiled glumly and put his hat on the chair next to him. He looked around at the unusually quiet crowd in the diner. “It looks like Mudville after Casey struck out, Mercy.”

  “Yeah – so tell us some good news. You said the lab results would be in today. When are you going to arrest Harry Drench?”

  He let out an exasperated breath. “Never.”

  “What do you mean? You’ve got his thumbprint on the jar of buttermints, his boot print in the office there, and he had all those candies from where the fire was.”

  “Except for, well, it’s not his thumbprint or his boot print. And...” He shook his head and looked at his hands clasped in front of him on the table as he tapped his thumbs together. “...it turns out he was having dinner at Rocco’s with a reporter and photographer from the Gazette for an hour before and after the fire. He has an air-tight alibi, with photographs and a dozen respectable witnesses.”

  I wished I hadn’t given up cussing. It made it very hard to express myself right now.

  “What the...Geez...Crimony! That’s just not possible, Brody! What about the mints? They came from the jar by the fire.”

  “Maybe, maybe not.”

  “There must be some good news, Sheriff,” Ruby said with a pleading look in her eyes. “What else have you found out?”

  “Well, there is one more thing, but I don’t think you want to hear it.”

  Ruby and I looked at each other. “Well,” I said, “how bad can it be? I mean, you just told us that all the physical evidence is worthless, at least for incriminating Harry Drench. Tell us.”

  He winced. “Are you sure?”

  We nodded.

  “Okay. So, you know that deed from Paint to Drench, the one that sold the whole town to Drench’s family in 1899...well, it’s not a fake or a forgery. It’s a legitimate deed.”

  I threw up my arms, but then took a cleansing breath and had a Zen moment. I would deal with all of this later. I smiled and turned to Ruby.

  “Are you coming out to the rodeo with me, Ruby?” I asked her as Deloris came over with a fresh pot of coffee.

  “I can’t, Mercy. I’ve got to make my persimmon pudding for the fair. I’ll drive out in a few hours.”

  “Get your fresh, hot muffins!” Smoke announced proudly, coming out of the kitchen with a platter of his Grandmother’s Harvest Dream muffins, fresh out of the oven. He had been working to perfect them all week.

  Babs grabbed a stack of small plates and set them out, as Smoke followed behind her placing a muffin on each plate with his long stainless-steel tongs.

  “Enjoy folks! Banana, apple, and pumpkin spice all together in in a delicious muffin! Let me know what you think!” he said. “I got another batch coming out in fifteen minutes that I’m taking to the fair. I can smell that blue ribbon already!” He was like a kid, with a jubilant bounce in his step as he went around the dining room.

  Ruby looked like she was frightened by the large muffin, after she had already eaten an entire soft-boiled egg and one piece of dry toast for breakfast.

  “I’ll split mine with you, Ruby,” I said.

  “I just want a nibble, Merse.”

  I broke a piece off and passed the plate to her. Brody had already taken a big bite, but he wasn’t chewing. His eyes were open wide. Then he put a napkin to his mouth and spit out the whole mouthful into it.

  “Brody! It can’t be that bad. Fresh fruit, eggs, butter...all good stuff.”

  “Your turn,” he said with a smile. “Try it!”

  I popped the piece in my mouth. It was horrible. People all around the dining room looked like they had been sucking on lemons.

  “Smoke!” I hollered.

  He was already looking at the diners, a little befuddled.

  “Here...” I said. He walked over to me and I put a piece of muffin into his mouth.

  He swallowed it, with effort. “Well, sun of a gun. I asked Zack to go downstairs and fill the sugar canister up for me from the 50-pound sack. The boy put salt in it instead!”

  That got a chuckle from everyone, and we pushed our muffin plates to the middle of the table. Smoke apologized to the other people, while Babs collected the plates. Then he shuffled back into the kitchen with his tail between his legs.

  “Well, I’m going to make sure that I put sugar in my pudding!” Ruby said as she got up to go home. “I’ll see you out there later. What time do you ride, Mercy?”

  “Four o’clock,” I said. “Brody’s event starts at 5:30.”

  “That gives me plenty of time. I’ll be there cheering you both!”

  “I should be going soon too, Mercy,” Brody said. “Have you been visiting Maybelle?”

  “Every day, Brody. We’re besties now. And she’s gotten pretty good on her tight turns. We ended up third after all the riders last week, and I took it pretty easy on her. We have a good shot at placing. Did you go and visit those bucking ponies?”

  “I never do. I’m not their friend; I’m their boss. I’m the alpha stallion, and they need to have a little fear and respect when they see me coming.”

  “Huh. I’m not afraid when I see you coming.”

  “That’s because, with us
, you’re the boss.” He smiled and kissed my cheek. Then he gave me a wink and a nod and left the diner.

  Okay, then!

  Babs was looking kind of down, staring out the window. Jake hadn’t been back to the diner since last weekend when she took him upstairs. I walked over and rubbed her shoulders.

  “He’ll be back, Babs. He and Junior have that big construction contract, putting in a new employee lounge out at the distillery.”

  “He still has to eat, Mercy.” Her face was forlorn as she looked at me now with sad eyes. “I shouldn’t have been so stupid and jealous. Now I’ll never see him again.”

  “Babs,” I said, sitting next to her, “you know we’ve been sending out sandwiches for the distillery guys every day this week, during the construction. Jake is eating there.”

  “Junior has come in here, though.”

  “Just a couple times, with his new squeeze. Liberty stops by the job site at lunch time and brings him here so they can sit and gaze into each other’s eyes.”

  I saw a red pickup truck pull up across the street, and I smiled.

  “I’d like to gaze into my Jakey’s eyes again sometime, Mercy.” Her eyes filled to the brim with tears as she spoke, and I took a napkin to wipe them.

  I made sure Babs kept her eyes on me as Jake stepped out of his pick-up truck. He reached back into the vehicle to get something. It was a big bouquet of roses – at least two dozen with a lot of white baby’s breath. They looked beautiful – but I held my breath as Jake stood to adjust his shirt. He usually parked right in front, but today he parked across the street, in front of Madame DuChayne’s shop. Who were the roses for? I held my breathe. Then he lifted his cap with his hand full of roses and slicked down his thinning hair with the other.

  Jake looked to his left and right and then started across the street for the diner. I breathed again. I took Babs’s round cheeks between my hands. “Close your eyes and make a wish, Babs. What would you like right now?”

  “I want Jake to walk in the door and smile at me, Mercy. That’s all.”

  The door opened.

  “Open your eyes, Babs.”

  She turned her head. Her jaw dropped and her eyes opened wide when she saw Jake, in a brand new shirt and clean blue jeans. He took off his cap and stopped about three steps short of Babs and looked at me. I motioned my head toward Babs two times, encouraging him to do what he came here for. Babs primped her hair but remained seated. There were a few people in the diner, but it was silent.

  I think Jake may have stopped breathing, and his face was turning red now.

  “Oh, for pity’s sake,” Deloris finally said from behind the counter, “are those for me, Jake?”

  He shook his head. “No.”

  “I see. Are they for Mercy?”

  He shook his head again. Babs stood up and took two steps toward him.

  “Are they for me, Jakey?”

  He gulped and shook his head. “Yup...yes, ma’am. These are for you, Babs.”

  He held them out to her, and everyone applauded as she accepted them. Babs hugged him and gave him a kiss on the lips.

  “Sit down, Jake,” Babs told him in her typical friendly style. He sat in his regular spot at the counter. Babs was walking fast, with her little bounce again.

  “It’s nice to have our Babsy back,” Deloris said to me with a hint of a smile.

  “It sure is, Deloris. It sure is.”

  Chapter Eleven

  My ride went well. Maybelle was amazing, but the final gal set a new record for Kentucky. It was a little painful to have top honors ripped away from me by the last rider, but she really was terrific – and a sweet 16-year-old cowgirl too. I was happy to accept the red ribbon and a medium-sized trophy for second place. I joined Ruby, Babs and Jake in the grandstand. Liberty was there too. Ruby texted me a nice message about my ride. She said she was there rooting for me, but she was watching with Justin from the area reserved for contestants next to the corrals. Her persimmon pudding wouldn’t be judged until 7:00.

  “Where’s Junior?” I asked, after they got done congratulating me.

  Liberty just shrugged. “He didn’t say where he was going. But there are just a few amateur exhibition riders coming up now, before the bronco event.”

  Jake had a huge smile plastered on his face. I thought it was because he was sitting there with Babs, but then he pointed out to the field.

  The announcer said, “Our first amateur roper, from Paint Creek, Kentucky is Jake Carter, Junior. Let out the calf, Gus!”

  Junior galloped out from the corral on a horse that looked two sizes too small for him. He looked pretty good, twirling the lasso as he chased the fiery little calf across the field.

  “Go, Junior!” his proud papa hollered.

  Liberty still had her jaw on her chest. She grabbed my arm, her eyes still peeled on her man, and squeezed like crazy. I patted her hand and rubbed it until she loosened her grip.

  Just as he let the lasso fly, the horse stopped in its tracks for no apparent reason. Junior went flying off, over its head and did a belly flop onto the muddy field. Liberty squeezed again, and Jake got to his feet.

  Junior gave the crowd a wave to indicate that he was okay, but I was glad to see a rodeo clown run out to help him...or so I thought. He took Junior’s rope, flipped the big cowboy onto his back, and hogtied Junior’s feet and arms with the rope! Then the clown held up one hand, like the ropers do to tell the judges they are finished.

  The crowd laughed like crazy as poor Junior wiggled and wriggled to free himself from the rope. I was horrified, but Jake Senior was laughing and slapping his knee. I gave him an odd look, but he pointed to the field.

  “The show’s not done yet, Mercy! Watch this part!”

  Junior got up and faced the clown, two or three paces away from him. He threw his hat on the ground and raised his arms like he was in an angry discussion with him. Then he took a step forward and the clown started running. The announcer was narrating the whole thing.

  “Looks like old Stumblin’ Eddie is in trouble now! Junior is chasing him down.”

  The clown did a hilarious run, leaping with his feet spread in the air every few steps until Junior caught him in front of the bullpen. Son of Satan, was the big sign on the gate. This bull had almost killed a cowboy in Toledo and a lot of people wanted him banned from the games.

  Junior lifted the much smaller clown by his cross straps in the back of his overalls, and the clown kept his feet running in the air, as the crowd laughed and cheered.

  Junior looked at the crowd and pointed into the pen with the killer bull. He was asking the crowd if he should throw him in. There were cheers and whistles as well as many loud hollers of No! Mostly from the ladies in the audience.

  Junior lifted the clown over his head, as if to toss him in. Stumblin’ Eddie pedaled his feet rapidly and made an alarmed face. The crowd noise went up, and then Junior lowered him and put a hand to his ear to hear the yeas and nays. He raised him again as Eddie wiped his eyes with his fist. The crowd noise raised and then fell one more time as Junior raised and lowered him. Then Junior walked a few steps away, turned, and started to run towards the bullpen with Eddie raised high. Eddie’s hands were folded in prayer toward the crowd.

  That’s when Gus, the Bluegrass Buckaroo, ran out and stepped in front of Junior just before he hoisted Eddie into the pen with the snorting bull. Junior set Eddie down – less than gently, on his butt. Eddie stood up and dusted himself off as Gus pretended to scold them both. He kicked some dust at them and then gave Eddie a boot on the rear with the side of his leather boot. They all walked off the field, waving their hats, to the applause of the crowd.

  “If you all enjoyed the little show,” the announcer said “Junior Carter and Stumblin’ Eddie would appreciate it if you would pitch in a dollar or two for Sister Susie’s Children’s Home in Calhoun. The kids could sure use your help. Volunteers are coming around with baskets right now, just like church on Sunday. Show your Kentucky
generosity folks and our thanks to Junior and Eddie.”

  Jake was almost tearful with pride for his son, and Babs gave him a big hug. Liberty and I looked at each other with surprised, happy looks and hugged each other too.

  “Your big lug is quite a man!” Babs said to Liberty.

  If she had tried to speak, she would have cried, so she just nodded and smiled.

  I had felt a few sprinkles earlier, but suddenly, from out of nowhere, there was a huge clap of thunder and the rain began to pour down on us. Many people filed out, but our group ran up the steps to the part of the grandstand that was covered. It was just the top ten or so rows. I didn’t want to miss Brody’s ride. We stood in the aisle for twenty minutes, until they announced that the Broncos would be postponed until tomorrow afternoon.

  Chapter Twelve

  The rain let up, but the field was still too muddy for bronco riding. Jake and Junior went out to eat with their dates, but Brody and I met up with Justin and Ruby. We all took a walk through the fair.

  “How did your pudding, turn out, Ruby?” I asked her as we entered the midway by the Ferris wheel.

  “Better than Grandma’s!” she said, very excitedly. “There were a lot of delicious-looking desserts and side dishes there, but I might have a shot at a ribbon.”

  “Fingers crossed!” I said.

  “Where’s Babs? She was going to bring her creamed peas and yams.”

  “She was going to – but she spent the whole day with Jake and decided that was more important.”

  “Those two are so adorable together, Mercy. I’m just so happy for both of them. I hope it turns into something special.”

  “Fingers crossed!”

  “Let’s all go to the Beer Garden.” Justin suggested.

  “Great idea!” Ruby answered.

  Brody and I looked at each other with sour, unenthusiastic faces.

  “You two go ahead,” I said. “I’m going to teach Brody a lesson at the Shooting Gallery.”

  Ruby and Justin went their way, and I pulled Brody toward the Shooting Gallery.