Barbarian Alchemist (Princesses of the Ironbound Book 3)

by Aaron Crash

  Ymir kept a wry smile off his face. Here was another secret organization who was interested in him, and they seemed to be in exact opposition to the Midnight Guild. Could he trust them? Never. Could he use them? Yes. “Thank you, Professor Albatross. I told the Princept I wouldn’t make any more Akkiric Rings. I made this one, and that is all.” He showed her the Black Ice Ring. “I don’t suppose you know what it does.”

  “Ringology isn’t my specialty,” she said. “I think you’ll know, in time, its nature. I don’t mean to catch you in a lie, but I know you have crafted the Veil Tear Ring. I saw Tori, I think, or at least her astral body. And I think you used it to undo Haylee. To think, she was my friend. She would use the orishas for evil. I would never do that.”

  Linny seemed as ardent as she was upset. If she was lying, she was lying well.

  Ymir found himself trusting her.

  The Moons professor stood. “Gatha is coming. I’ll go down the other stairs. Please, Ymir, keep our friendship secret. Keep your ring-crafting secret. Della is a good woman, but she doesn’t understand the forces at work. We of the White Rose Society do.”

  The woman left, hurrying away.

  Not a minute later, Gatha came up the steps. She sat down, noticed the book, and snapped out her tusks in anger. “Where did you get that book? Have you been accessing the shelves on your own again? You know that’s not fucking allowed.”

  Ymir did enjoy the she-orc’s fiery temper. “Don’t worry. It’s not one of yours. I’ll tell you and the others about it, but not here.”

  Gatha relaxed and retracted her tusks. She stood, got on her knees in front of Ymir, and put her soft hands on either side of his face. She looked into his eyes.

  They stayed like that for several minutes, looking into each other’s souls, and Ymir knew they didn’t need to talk. Gatha was telling him she loved him, in her strange orc way. He let his own eyes show her he loved her back, and that she would be safe with him and his harem.

  “I’m no longer igptoor,” Gatha said firmly.

  “You are no longer igptoor,” Ymir agreed.

  And then he kissed her, tenderly, stroking her fine white hair.

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  YMIR SET HIS SATCHEL, which contained the book Circulum, on the floor of the entryway to Jenny’s apartment. The balcony doors were open. Flames flickered in a firepit on the balcony.

  Lillee stood in the living room with a hand on her hip, frowning. Forearm cuff in place, in her school robes, she looked as severe and unapproving as Issa Leel. “Tori, you have to stop this. You’re still healing.”

  “Lil, I love ya, you know that, but you aren’t my ahmy. I’m fine. Really. I’d feel a whole lot worse if I wasn’t cooking.” The little woman was in a blue dress, frilly and lacy, but barefoot. Her boots and robes were in the entryway along with everyone else’s gear. It was a tight fit there. Tori had a number of pots burbling, and a big bird roasting on a spit in the fire. She was cooking a ton of food all by herself.

  Gatha brushed past Ymir. “Tori, I will help you. In that way, you’ll rest quicker.”

  The dwab threw her chubby hands over her head. “No, this is my treat. Gosh me underground, but you all are making me nervous. I’m fine! I hate the scars, though.”

  The she-orc’s face was marked with lines of lighter-colored flesh. She motioned to them. “I am proud of my scars. I won them in battle. I killed many of those fucking fish people.”

  Tori let out a yelp of protest. “They aren’t fish people. They’re just people like us, some good, and some bad. As we saw, that Marrib was definitely bad. And you’re a Gruul, Gatha. You like that scar stuff. I’m already saddled with these big tits, and now I have ugly scars as well.”

  The she-orc came up behind the dwab and filled her hands with those breasts. Gatha kissed Tori’s ear. “I love your tits. I love your scars. I love you, Toriah Welldeep.”

  Tori got so full of emotion she couldn’t help but turn around and kiss Gatha for real. Standing on her stool, she was a good height for a hug also. Lillee looked on with a certain thoughtful expression on her face. Her right hand fiddled with her essess.

  Ymir glanced around. “Where’s Jenny?” Then he saw her, out on her balcony, sitting and watching the fire dance in the ocean wind.

  The clansman went outside and pulled up a chair to sit next to her. She had a big glass of wine, half of it gone, and she was watching the flames with her striking blue eyes. Her hair was a midnight pile on her head, a few wisps hanging in her face, which she played with. He hadn’t seen her twirl her hair in a long time. She must be upset. At least she was comfortable—her white dress was loose on her, and she wasn’t wearing a brassiere. Her cleavage caught the light of the fire.

  Ymir could guess why she was worried. “Jenny, we’ll keep this apartment. I’ll find the money. I think once we start working with the fairies, we’ll have plenty for both your tuition and your rent.”

  She took his hand. “No, Ymir, it’s too expensive. I never thought I’d lose all my money. I never thought I’d rebel against my family either. I’m just feeling it tonight. I shouldn’t, I know. I should be happy we’ll have this place for another few months. After that? We’ll just crowd in together in the sea cells. I’ll sleep on a bag of xoca powder.”

  “We also have the Amora Annex,” he said. “I’ve been eyeing a drying rack that looks comfortable.”

  Jenny found some laughter. “We have some options, I know. I’ll miss this place, though. I have so many memories here, mostly of you and Lillee.”

  Gatha shouted something, and Tori laughed. Even Lillee giggled. The three women were loud and happy.

  Jenny gave him a smile. “Y’all are my home in the end. I’m being dumb. I’m getting used to that, being around you. I thought I was the smartest person at this school until I met you. Nope. I’m dumb. D-U-M.”

  “No, you’re perfect.” He leaned over and kissed her. “We’ll make other memories in other places, if it comes to that. I have news, though—about Ziziva, and about a secret ally that could help us make more rings.”

  Jenny stuck out a tongue. “These rings sure are hit and miss. The Black Ice Ring does shit. The Veil Tear Ring is powerful beyond belief. As for the Yellow Scorch and the Winter Flame Rings? They’re like fucking cantrips.”

  “Powerful cantrips,” Ymir pointed out.

  The swamp woman rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Yes, you were able to charge up the Fractal Clock, but after next year, we’ll have access to the fascinara spells. That will allow us to enchant items.”

  Ymir’s hand dropped to the little pouch on his belt where he kept the two new rings. For now, Tori kept the Veil Tear Ring. So far, Lillee still hadn’t tried to use it.

  “We’re still learning about these things,” Ymir said. “I think there are more secrets we can unravel. We shall see. And if Tori can make alchemical treats for the hellhound, I believe anything is possible.”

  “I heard my name!” Tori called. “And as for the hellhound, I’ve decided to name him Fluffy.”

  “Woman!” Ymir roared good-naturedly. “He’s a beast from the abyss. You can’t name him Fluffy!”

  “I can! I did! It’s done!” The dwab came out, wiping sweat from her brow. Her red hair was frizzy. “You two come and eat. I made us a roast bird with special gravy, so it won’t be dry, as well as some mashed corn, my own recipe, and stewed mushrooms, again, my own recipe. We’re eating like dwarves tonight!”

  They went into the living room. The food was laid out on the table in front of the sofa. Two other chairs had been dragged over. Jenny had her own set of dishes and silverware. While they ate, Ymir told them about his conversation with Ziziva and his strange encounter with Linny.

  For dessert, Tori brought out her xocalati puff corn balls. She’d cooked them up in the Amora Annex and was still working on her recipe. Ymir liked to eat them with kaif, strong and black. It was the perfect antidote for the bitter taste.

  Jennybelle jumped on the v
arious conspiracies in front of them. “No wonder the Fayee are so rich, and no wonder they hold so many positions of power in the Undergem Guild. If they can make you forget things, they could try different deals, and then gauge your reaction. Did I really have sex with Ziziva in the shower? I don’t remember a thing.”

  “You did,” Ymir said.

  Gatha’s tusks shot from her mouth. “If they try to hurt you, Ymir, if they try to hurt any of us, I will murder them all.”

  Jenny frowned. “Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that, green stuff. It sounds like Z and the rest of the fairies are willing to work with us. This is good. This would bring in a lot of money.”

  “Enough to save this apartment?” Lillee asked. As an artist, money and numbers weren’t her strong suit.

  The she-orc retracted her tusks and frowned. “Green stuff? Really?

  “Sorry, G.” Jenny laughed. “As for this place, it’s really not worth the money. We have other options.”

  “Like I could pay for everything,” Tori insisted. She brought them more of the puff corn balls. She poured more kaif and wine.

  Ymir felt a knot of lust in his belly.

  “No, we couldn’t make you do that.” Jenny adjusted her breasts. Her nipples were hard, and there was a blush rising up her chest. Sweat dribbled down her face.

  “Make me? I’m offering,” the little woman said.

  “You’re already paying too much,” Ymir said. “I’m keeping track. I’ll pay you back. I still have ideas for other products we could sell.” His eyes went to Tori’s chest.

  Gatha was already staring at the little woman’s breasts. There was still so much about the she-orc’s past he didn’t know. What had happened to her friend Migdish? What was the full story of that dark day at the arena? What was her relationship with this Donnalg person?

  He did know one thing about Gatha, though—she loved tits as much as he did.

  Lillee slid the cuff off her forearm. “I’m sorry. I don’t think I can talk more until we fuck. I’m so horny suddenly. My oheesy is so wet. Maybe I could just masturbate while you talk.” Without her cuff on, Lillee was shameless. She gathered up her dress and spread her legs. Right there, on the couch, she started touching herself.

  Jenny blinked. “I’m as randy as a dog in June as well. Tori, did you make those puff balls with the Amora Xoca?”

  Tori smiled mischievously. “I like to work, and I like to plan, just like the next girl, but I’m liking this sex stuff more and more, now that I have some control over it. I figured you all would want to blather on about demons and magic rings, and I’m tired of all that. I hope you don’t mind. If you do? Well, it’s too late!”

  Gatha dropped to her knees and pulled Tori over. The she-orc growled and buried her face between Tori’s breasts, her big nipples clearly visible.

  Jenny’s eyes fell on Ymir. “We can worry about this White Rose Society later. And yes, you ain’t wrong about the money. If the new deal with The Paradise Tree should cover my bills, good. If not, we’ll figure it out. As for the rings, we’ve made four of them. We might as well keep going.”

  Tori let out a gasp. “See? You people can’t stop. Let’s just get naked and screw.”

  “Agreed. Less talking and more fucking.” Gatha rose, stripping even while she kissed the little woman. Her green breasts dangled from her chest.

  Jennybelle stood and pulled Ymir into her bedroom. “Come on. I want you first before these other greedy bitches drain you.”

  The clansman let himself be pulled in. Lillee came in first, flinging off her dress, her face shining with sweat.

  Tori and Gatha followed, both as different as they could be—the dwab was red-haired and freckled and chubby while Gatha was tall, green, and muscled.

  Ymir found himself on his back, with the women around him, kissing and touching him. Life at Old Ironbound wasn’t easy, not at all, and his life had been threatened at every turn.

  Yet, he wouldn’t trade his life for anything. He was nearly halfway done with his formal education, and he’d begun to wonder what lay after graduation. Would he explore foreign lands? Would he seek empire? Would he conquer the Ax Tundra?

  Or would he simply find a home for his growing harem of beautiful women and take care of them? He loved all four. And though they were all outcasts in their own way, they’d all found belonging and warmth with each other.

  After hours of lovemaking, they all tried to sleep in the same bed, but soon gave up. There was no room. Gatha left first for the couch, growling and cursing.

  Tori escaped next. She noticed Ymir still awake. She bent and whispered into his ear, “Monday night, it’s just you and me. We’ll stay in the Zoo. I love you, Ymir, son of Ymok. I love that I can have you all to myself every now and again.”

  “As much as you want,” Ymir whispered back. “I love you too, Toriah Welldeep.”

  They kissed sweetly, and the dwab left.

  He heard her pull the two chairs together in the other room. She was short enough to make that work as a bed.

  Ymir had to admire the little woman. She was making his harem work for her by asking for what she needed, and by keeping her jealousy in check. Tori was a marvel. He was lucky to have her in his life.

  He sighed and tried to sleep. Even with only Jenny and Lillee, Ymir got too hot in the cramped bed.

  He went into the living room. He adjusted the blanket on Gatha, who slept on the couch. He brushed Tori’s red hair away from her face. His heart filled with love, looking at her adorable freckled face.

  He then went outside to the balcony to enjoy the cool air. The embers of Jenny’s fire only needed a little coaxing to reignite. Flames licked from the last of her wood.

  Leaning back in the chair, with his feet up, Ymir soon found sleep, next to the fire, under the stars above, with the two moons shining down.

  Books, Mailing List, and Reviews

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  Looking for more from Aaron Crash, and need it right this minute? Check out: Raider Annihilation (Son of Fire Book 1). Or keep reading to take a sneak peek.

  HE’S NO ANGEL, BUT He’s Got Everything She Needs

  He was minding his own business on Earth when a beautiful sorceress summoned him to defend a backwater village from demonic raiders. He’s lost his gun, his family, and even his name, but it’s not the first fight he’s been in, and it won’t be the last.

  The sorceress isn’t happy—she expected an ancient goddess of war. Instead, she got some random guy who’s halfway decent with a sword. But there’s more to him than good looks and a big stick, and if he can harness this new world’s magic, the town of Foulwater might just be glad he stuck around.

  First, though, he’ll have to get a busty elf buccaneer to sober up, sail through monster-infested waters, kick a bunch of lava monsters in the face, and plunder the submerged basement of a demon king. It’s a race against time before the raiders return to burn down the village, and their deadliest enemy might already be inside the walls.

  Disclaimer: Raider Annihilation is a steamy iseka
i harem adventure like no other. Our hero isn't shy and neither are the women of Caranja. There is sex on the page, swearing, smoking, drug use, and goat-milk beer. Enter a spicy new world from Aaron Crash, the bestselling author of the American Dragon series and The Princesses of the Ironbound.

  Chapter One

  BEFORE THE TORMENT, I smelled coffee.

  I had been with friends and family, in a nice house with a fireplace, a big kitchen, and a ton of smiling faces. I remembered the light in the windows, the warm mug in my fist, and the weight of a friend’s hand on my shoulder. We were talking about something important, and he was worried about me. Why? I couldn’t remember.

  I made it clear that worry wasn’t our friend. A wise man once told me that worrying was not preparation. He also told me something else, rather strange.

  Agony was your friend.

  Not only did it tell you that something was very, very wrong, it also focused you like nothing else. You couldn’t be bored if you were in excruciating pain. You couldn’t contemplate your own mortality. You couldn’t worry about how much Taco Bell you were eating. You couldn’t worry. Period. Pain reduced life to only one sensation, and that made things very, very simple.

  Normally.

  First coffee, then pain.

  I was in blinding anguish, and that anguish did things to me. If pain is weakness leaving the body, I was going to emerge the Incredible fucking Hulk. It felt like someone had surgically removed my internal organs and pounded them flat with a ten-pound sledgehammer. Sprinkle with battery acid. Bake at three hundred and fifty degrees for forty-five minutes. Then? My insides were shoved back into my body along with a dozen live scorpions dipped in habanero juice.

  My mind was reduced to nacho cheese.

  A woman chanted words, over and over, in a language I didn’t know. There was a flash of light. Then?

  I could understand her words. The agony subsided, though I still felt as dizzy as a dervish and twice as nauseated. I had no idea who I was, where I was, or what my name might be.