Smiling, she places her hand over mine and squeezes before letting go. “Speaking of people who deserve to be happy, I guess things with Eric are still going well since he’s helping you move today.”
Groaning, I roll my eyes and sit back in my chair before taking a drink of my coffee. Heat rises on my cheeks as she stares, waiting for me to share. I’d finally told her everything when she caught me sneaking in Monday morning after falling asleep in Eric’s arms. It was like I was on a high from being with him, and everything came streaming out of me.
“Yep. Everything is good,” I clip.
Things are better than that, though. They’re amazing. So much so, it’s left me feeling a little off center, like my universe is no longer on its axis. It’s the same kind of instinctive feeling you get right before you realize you’re dreaming. I’ve become so accustom to my life going in every direction except the right one, happiness has become a foreign concept to me.
“That’s all I get? I need details.”
Huffing, I place my coffee back down on the kitchen table and cross my arms. Not that I would tell her, but there really isn’t anything to tell. Outside of our heavy make-out sessions with some light petting, we’re taking things very slow. At times, I might even say painstakingly slow. But it’s what I need. Not only am I still technically married, but Christopher is the only person I’ve been with outside of that night with Jim. To say I have issues when it comes to sex would be an understatement. Relationships in general aren’t exactly easy for me.
“Fine,” she crumbles. “Don’t expect to get off that easy with Lori. You know she’s going to have all kinds of questions and plenty to say.”
My stomach knots and I moan as I bury my head in my hands. I don’t know how to describe what Eric and I are doing or what we are to each other. We aren’t really dating since we haven’t been on any dates, and we’re not technically a couple yet either—at least, I don’t think we are—but we’re so much more than just friends. I think we always have been.
My lips curl into a smile and my heart flutters, thinking of his confession about falling in love with me in fifth grade. I remember the day he described so clearly. My crush on him developed months earlier, and it felt like I’d won the lottery when I was sat right next to him. Then, he spent the rest of elementary school and junior high practically ignoring me. I never would have guessed he had feelings for me.
“Wow,” Lizzy whistles, bringing me out of my daze. “I don’t know where your mind went, but I’ve never seen your face light up like a Christmas tree before.” Her eyes get teary as she regards me with a tilted head, and I shift uncomfortably in my chair, feeling exposed.
“I can handle Lori,” I croak, avoiding her comment.
She laughs and shakes her head as she reaches for her coffee. “I’m starting to think we should call you the vault,” she cracks. “You keep everything locked up behind that strong exterior of yours.”
Shrugging, I give her a lopsided grin. She’s right about one thing, I do keep everything locked away, but that’s because I’m weak not strong.
My eyes roam around my new apartment. My apartment. It feels so good. The bare white walls make the space feel large, though the kitchen and living room are virtually the same space with a small bedroom off to the side. Everywhere I look, there are boxes, and most of my furniture won’t be delivered until tomorrow, but none of that matters because it’s mine.
“All right, baby sis, time to spill the beans.” Lori huffs as she drops the box she’s carrying on the floor.
I’ve been doing my best to avoid her all day, but now that it’s only the two of us, there’s no dodging her. Sighing, I roll my eyes and begin opening the box in front of me.
“What are you talking about?”
“Don’t play dumb.” She places a hand on her hip as I glare at her. “You know exactly what I’m talking about. Eric. How and when did that happen? I thought the two of you stopped talking after you married Christopher.”
“We did, but he’s my boss. So, we kind of didn’t have a choice in the matter.”
“What?” she screeches, taking a step closer to me. “He’s your boss? Holy hell that’s hot. Does he bend you over his desk at the end of the day?”
“Oh. My. God. No,” I moan, dropping my head and shaking it as my face turns into a giant tomato.
“Well, don’t try to tell me he’s merely your boss. He wouldn’t be helping you move if that were the case. And if you say you’re just friends, I’m going to scream. The poor guy has always been crazy about you, and given the way he’s been looking at you today, nothing has changed.”
I’m thankful my face is already red, hiding the effect her comment has on me. I’ve been careful to keep my distance from Eric today, not wanting to put our relationship—whatever it is—on display for everyone, but it hasn’t been easy. Especially, those times I caught him watching me with a look of wonderment and admiration on his face.
“What makes you think I’m going to tell you or say anything about it period?” I retort, my lips curving as her face falls. “It’s not any of your business either way.”
Her eyes narrow and her lips pucker as if my words left a sour taste in her mouth. Crossing her arms, she puffs out a harsh breath in annoyance. “Fine. Be that way. You don’t need to tell me, but you’d be crazy to not hook up with him. He has certainly developed well. He’s fine as hell, and, lord, those arms of his are mesmerizing.”
My jaw clamps as I grind my teeth, trying to ignore the rancid taste of jealousy washing up from the pit of my stomach. “Well, I noticed Levi checking you out a couple times today. Maybe you can get your claws into him,” I clip.
“Uh oh, did I hit a nerve?” Her hand lands on her hip, looking pleased with herself. “Don’t worry, I’m not interested in your beau, and I’m certainly not interested in baby Winston. Isn’t he like twelve?”
“He’s twenty-two, and you have to admit, he is cute.”
“He’s a decade younger than me, Julia. No. Just…no.” She shivers as she shakes her head, and I can’t help laughing at her.
Lori is a bit of a serial dater. She would tell you she isn’t looking for a serious relationship, that she wants to focus on herself and her career, but I think she’s afraid of falling in love and picks the wrong men on purpose. She’s dated rich and poor, smart and dumb, thick and thin, but they’ve all been completely wrong for her. I’d say the only thing she hasn’t tried is younger.
“You never know, a younger guy may be the thing that fits your glass slipper. Maybe Levi is the one.”
“I’m not looking for ‘the one’,” she protests. “But if I were, baby boy would be so wrong for me.”
“I don’t know, he seems like he could be the right kind of wrong.”
Walking away, she flips me off as I begin laughing again. Levi’s flirting may have helped me successfully escape the Eric conversation, but it isn’t something I can avoid forever. I need to figure out what’s going on between us.
“So, what’s the deal with you and Julianna?” Levi asks as we pull back up to her new apartment. “I thought the two of you were together now.”
Throwing the car in park, I turn and cut my eyes at him, wishing again I hadn’t asked him to help me today. My plan was to speed up the process so Julianna and I could have some alone time, but she invited Levi and Lori to stay for dinner, and my patience is running thin.
“What the hell does that mean? We are,” I grit out. Heat rises in my chest as whispered doubts echo in my mind, my insecurities taking hold. “Kind of.”
In truth, I don’t really know what’s happening with the two of us. Though I’ve been thoroughly enjoying being able to touch and kiss her, nothing else has really changed. She asked that we take things slow, and I want to do my best to honor that, but it’s left me questioning where we stand.
“How does a person kind of date someone?” He shakes his head at me.
My jaw locks as I reach to grab the food from the backseat. Growling
in frustration, I open the door and climb out of the car.
“It’s complicated,” I hiss as he joins me, still eyeing me expectantly. “Why are you so damn interested anyway?”
“It just seems odd.” He shrugs as we make our way up the stairs to Julianna’s apartment. “I’ve been watching the two of you today, and you look more like friends than a couple.”
His words make me cringe. He’s right. She’s kept her distance today. I figured it had something to do with everyone being around, and I didn’t want to push her into anything that would make her feel uncomfortable, but I have no intention of ever being just friends with her again. Perhaps I need to be damn sure everyone is clear on where I stand.
“We aren’t fucking teenagers. We’re capable of keeping our hands off each other.”
“Whatever you say, man,” he relents, smirking as he holds up his hands. “But if it were me, and I could touch her—” A loud hissing sound escapes me, cutting him off. I give him a very threating glare in warning of what will happen if he continues his statement. “You’re no fun.” He lets out an exasperated groan, rolling eyes. “What about her sister? Is she single?”
“Oh, no,” I laugh, shaking my head as we step onto the third-floor landing. “Leave Lori alone too. She’s ten years older than you. Why don’t you find some girl your own age to hit on? You know, Red is single.”
“Okay. First of all, I hate when you call her that. Her name is Roxy. Secondly, she’s like a sister to me, and that’s weird. As for other girls my age, they’re only interested in partying, and they play fucking mind games. No thanks.”
“Whatever, dude. But you have zero chance with Lori.”
“Well, now you’ve made it a challenge, which I fully accept.” His eyebrows dance, and he moves to stretch his muscles as if getting ready to play a sport.
“Good luck with that.” I hold up the key Julianna gave me to her apartment as some kind of proof of our relationship, but Levi presses his lips together, unimpressed with my evidence, and I grimace as I unlock the door.
When we walk back into Julianna’s apartment, I hurry over to the kitchen counter to set the food down before seeking her out. It’s stupid and immature to let Levi’s comments about our relationship bother me, but they do. So, I plan to remedy that right now.
“Hey, you,” she greets me as I walk in her room. The warm smile that lights up her face makes my heart flutter and drowns out any uncertainty I had about her feelings for me.
Without a word, I rush over to her and pull her into my arms. She squeals with laughter as I lift her slightly off the floor.
“What are you doing?” she breathes once she’s flat on her feet again, licking her lips as her eyes lock with mine.
Bringing my lips down on hers in response, I kiss her as if there’s no one else around, my tongue eagerly molding with hers as moans of pleasure escape me and my hands wander.
“Well, damn,” Lori drawls, breaking us apart. We’re both panting, her eyes still closed as I rest my forehead on hers. “You’ve definitely been holding out on me, little sister. I knew the two of you were enjoying some desk play.”
Her comment causes my back to straighten as my head shoots up, and I turn to glare at Lori with a furrowed brow before looking back to Julianna for an explanation.
Julianna’s face turns a deep shade of red as she shakes her head, her eyes narrowing as they land on Lori.
“Don’t try to deny it, that kiss was hot as hell.” When my gaze shifts back to her again, Lori begins fanning herself.
Levi steps in behind Lori as she laughs, placing his arm around her shoulders. Her laughter quickly fades as she gapes at him in horror, her body going rigid and her face pale.
“You know, I bet we could one up them.” He smirks, placing his other hand below her chin and caressing her lips with his thumb. “What do you say? Want to give it a try?”
“No,” she screeches, swatting away his hand and shrugging his arm off her shoulder. “Don’t you need to get home before you miss your curfew or something?”
Laughing, Levi winks at me before following Lori out of the room.
I tighten my hold on Julianna as my eyes land back on her, and she sighs in contentment.
“If I had known you were planning to kiss me like that, I wouldn’t have asked them to stay,” she laughs.
“Guys, time for you to go,” I call over my shoulder.
Shaking her head, Julianna presses her lips together to contain her laughter as she playfully swats at me. My heart swells inside my chest as I stare at her in awe. This is what I’ve always wanted. This is the way we were always meant to be. This is how I want us to be for the rest of our lives.
GET HER BACK
“Are you sure you want to do this?” she asks, fidgeting with her clothes as she stares in the mirror.
When she first told me about her old friend from high school, I didn’t think much of it. She said they never dated, and from her stories, I figured he was some nerdy fucker who spanks it. Plus, she’d be dumb to pick someone over me. I’m the fucking grand prize—handsome, rich, and educated. But I don’t like that she’s been spending so much of her free time with this asshat, or the way she lights up when she’s talking about him.
Julianna is mine, and I’m going to make damn sure this guy gets that message tonight.
“Of course, baby,” I coo, placing my hands on her hips. As I grind my growing erection into her backside, she inhales and closes her eyes. I love the way her inexperienced body reacts to me. It makes me so hard knowing I’m the only man who’s ever been inside her. “He’s important to you, and you’re important to me, so I want to get to know him.”
Her eyes flutter open as she turns in my arms. Smiling, she gives me a light kiss on my lips. When she pulls back to meet my gaze, worry and guilt are evident in her features.
“I feel I should warn you, things with Eric and I are different. We have this connection, but we’re only friends. Okay? I want to be with you.”
Rage bubbles in my veins and I struggle to keep my expression neutral. I’m the only person she should be connected to.
“I can handle you having male friends, Julia. I’m not insecure. Besides, I’ll be the one in your bed tonight.”
Something strange crosses through her features—discomfort, or maybe even disgust. Before I can call her out on it, there’s a knock at her front door. She leans up to kiss me, her tongue tangling with mine as if it’s her life source, melting away my concerns.
She breaks our kiss before scurrying over to answer the door, and I stay back, admiring the way her jeans hug her perfectly round ass. Her voice rises an octave as she greets him, and my eyes snap up in irritation. She launches herself toward him as he steps inside, wrapping her arms around him and clinging on as if she’s dying of thirst and he’s a tall glass of water. Smirking, the son of a bitch eyeballs me over her shoulder, and a murderous rage heats the blood pumping through my veins. My suspicions were right; he wants what’s mine. You don’t want to play this game with me, fucker. I’m going to take you down.
“Hey, Jules,” he practically purrs as she pulls out of his embrace. What the hell did he call her? “I brought some of that beer I was telling you about.”
He holds up the twelve pack in his hand, and I roll my eyes. Of course he’s a beer drinker. Julianna doesn’t even like that shit, does she?
She beams at him like a schoolgirl with a crush as she takes it from him, and my fists curl. “Thank you.” Her eyes skirt in my direction for the first time since she let him in, and she clears her throat before they slide back to him. “Eric, this is Christopher.”
She gestures in my direction, and he pulls his greedy eyes away from my girl to settle them on me. Squaring my shoulders, I lock my jaw, determined to make sure he knows he is neither liked or welcome.
“Hey, man,” he says, taking a step toward me with his hand extended. “Nice to meet you.”
Refusing to shake his hand, I merely glare at it
until Julianna looks over in my direction. If I’m going to beat him at his own game, I better figure out the rules. Like playing nice in front of Julianna. Taking his hand, I’m sure to make my grip firm—almost overly tight.
“Yeah, I’m so glad you could join us,” I smirk, dropping his hand and enjoying the temporary slip of his features as I remind him she’s mine.
When my eyes land on her again, she gives me a tight smile and walks over to me. “Will you put these in the fridge for me?” She comes to a stop in front of me, pushing the box in my direction. “I’m going to take Eric to the living room.”
No way in hell do I want to leave the two of them alone, but I play it cool. “Of course, baby.” Stepping closer, I lean in to give her a kiss, but she pulls back, keeping it no more than a quick pop of the lips.
“This way,” she says, gesturing for him to follow her, her cheeks red.
As she begins to walk away, I smack her ass, and she gasps. Her back stiffens as she turns, looking at me with surprise. I’ve never done anything like that—at least not with other people around, and she likely knows exactly why I did it now. Without a word, she continues toward the other room. My skin heats from Eric’s fiery stare as he passes, but I pretend not to notice, keeping my eyes on Julianna.
My ears perk up, trying to listen to them in the living room as I hurry to put the beer away. The sound of their laughter surrounds me as I make my way to them, and my lip curls in disgust. They’re so engrossed in one another when I enter the room, neither of them notice me. Arms crossed, I stand in the entryway, watching them together, jealousy and anger curdling in my gut.
They’re sitting next to each other on the floor in front of the television playing video games, so close, her leg is touching his. He bumps her shoulder, saying something about winning. Her eyes are practically glowing when she looks over at him, her gaze lingering on him as a warm smile spreads across her face.
My chest tightens. She’s never looked at me that way—with love in her eyes. He may have her heart now, but I’m going to make damn sure he never has the rest of her.
Crushed (In This Moment Book 2) Page 14