We have a few minutes to spare so we sit in the car and Emma keeps talking about all the latest school gossip. I don’t contribute. I just nod here and there, which allows me to think about what had happened today with my mom. I’m still not sure where my reaction to her came from, but it felt good. I had finally stood up for myself, and while I am unsure about the consequences that I’ll face when I eventually go home, right now, I am feeling proud of myself.
“We should go in Harp. It’s eight o’clock.”
Exhaling I say, “Ok, let’s get this over with.”
After we walk in, I see a group of locals crowding around the small bar. Opposite of them are five small tables. All of them made out of solid wood, with a worn down finish from years of service. People are gathered around laughing and drinking.
The walls are lined with different paraphernalia, mostly sports stuff but also some music posters. We walk through the smoky bar and continue down the narrow hallway passing the bathrooms. Once we finally reach the entrance of the back room, all eyes turn to us. There are six pool tables and four dartboards, two on each side of the room, along with small tables scattered throughout and another small bar on the corner.
“Over there, Harp. Vincent is in the corner in the back, see him?”
“Yeah. This place gives me the creeps.”
We walk through the room to where Vincent is. Justin isn’t here because he’s on the bus with the baseball team. I wish he were here though, to help out to keep his cousin in check … somewhat.
“Well, well, well, you showed up,” Vincent announces.
“I’m here, let’s get this game over with. Get the table ready and you can break.”
“Hold up now, what’s the rush?”
I look at Vincent and notice he’s got that gleam in his eyes again. I also see there’s a small group of guys with him. I look between them and see they’re all eyeing Emma and me. Crap. I hope that Connor and Ethan get here fast. I don’t trust Vincent or any of the guys in this bar.
On our way to the table we had more than a dozen offers and “compliments” thrown at us. I’ve had a bad day, my head is throbbing, and I can feel a tingling down my back and legs. I’m really not in the mood to deal with Vincent tonight.
“Cut the crap Vincent and just break already, ok?”
I feel Emma grab my hand and give it a small squeeze before stepping away from me so I can get a pool cue.
“Feisty tonight, are we? Well, I can work with that. In fact, I might like you better like this.”
My goal wasn’t to get him to like me better—just the opposite.
I shoot Vincent a dirty look, “Just break ok?”
“Let’s flip for it—fair and square.”
“Fine. I call heads.”
“Tommy you wanna flip for us?” Vincent asks one of his cronies.
A medium height, stocky guy with dark eyes and dark hair steps forward, “Sure thing Vinny.”
“She called heads.”
“Well, heads wins. You gonna break pretty girl?” Tommy chuckles as his eyes sweep over my chest.
I don’t answer him. Instead, I take my spot at the table and ready my shot. I try to tune out the pain along with the sound of Vincent and his crew talking. I break and it’s good, sending three solids and one stripe into the pockets so the call is pretty obvious.
Vincent steps up to take his shots on the remaining striped balls on the table. He evens it up before it’s my turn again. I take my time assessing all my potential hits and go for one that I know I can make, but the pain in my back takes over and my aim is a little off the mark when it bounces off the side.
“Pretty girl off her game tonight?” Vincent taunts.
I ignore him and stand by Emma where we watch Vincent sink his next two shots. Crap, I’m really behind now.
I make the next shot and ready myself for my second one when I feel a hand on my butt. I look over my shoulder and quirk my eyebrow at Vincent. He immediately laughs and throws his offending hand in the air while backing away from me. I lean back over and make my next shot so we each have two balls left plus the eight ball.
Vincent makes his next shot leaving only one more striped ball on the table for him, but luckily, he misses. I make the next shot and take a deep breath. I know I have to knock this one in and go for the eight ball otherwise, I could lose it all right here. I make the shot and then call the eight ball while trying to ignore the filthy things coming from Vincent and his friends.
When the ball slides into the pocket, I release the tension I was holding and my shoulders descend in relief. I walk up to Vincent who is seething.
“Good game,” I say extending my hand. I want him to look me in the eyes and shake my hand. I want to know this is over between all of us.
“You’re not going to run out of here now, are you? How about we have a drink and make it the best two out of three?”
“Um, no, thanks.”
I lay the pool cue on the table and turn back to Emma.
“Come on sweetheart—just one shot. What’s the harm? I don’t see Ken doll here or his friend, so what’s the problem? I won’t tell if you won’t.”
Fuming, I walk up to Vincent and stand nose to nose with him, “I’m not playing these juvenile games with you. So turn yourself around and go back to your pathetic friends. Leave my friends and me the hell alone. Got it?”
“You heard her Vincent, back off … now,” I relax when I hear Connor’s voice. He sounds pissed, yet amused, probably because I’ve never been like this before.
Vincent takes a few steps back and Connor takes my hand and pulls me into him. I glance to see Ethan and Emma standing behind him and feel relieved.
“Did you win?” Connor asks me.
“Yeah,” I shake my head.
“You heard her, she won, so leave us alone. We are done.”
Connor tugs on my arm pulling me away from Vincent as we walk toward the front entrance with Ethan and Emma behind us. I silently pray that Vincent and his friends don’t follow us, and I’m thankful my prayers are being answered tonight.
“Meet you back at my place?” Connor asks Ethan over the hood of his truck.
“You got it,” Ethan says.
“You got here just in time.” I tell Connor as I feel a sense of security was over me.
“I could see that. What happened?”
I recount the evening’s events up until his arrival at the bar. After he’s heard everything we both sit in silence. I keep glancing over to him and see that his jaw is clenched and his knuckles are white from gripping the steering wheel a little bit too tight.
“What’s wrong? Did I do something wrong?”
He still doesn’t respond, so I reach my hand to his arm and he flinches, “Connor, talk to me, please. What’s going on?”
“Why are you dressed like that?”
“What? Is this why you’re mad? Of all the things that happened tonight, this is why you can’t even look at me?”
“Harp, don’t play games. Why are you dressed like that? Answer the question.”
Crap. He’s really pissed. He’s seriously pissed about it.
“Emma and I got ready at her house tonight and she thought it would be fun to dress me for the part. So I let her. If we had walked in there looking like two innocent high school girls we would have been eaten alive. She knew that and helped us fit in. It’s not that big of a deal. You need to get a grip.”
“Get a grip? Seriously, Harp, that’s what you think?”
“Honestly, Connor, I don’t know what to think because you won’t tell me. But I’ll remind you that you got me into this mess tonight and I got myself out of it.”
I’m so mad that I throw my head back into the headrest, “Ouch … CRAP!”
I touch the back of my head and delicately rub the sensitive spot.
“What’s wrong with your head?” Connor snaps at me.
“Nothing.” I snap right back at him and we don’t speak again until we pull
into his driveway.
Connor turns to me, “I’m sorry. You’re right … all of this is my fault, but Harp, I care about you a lot and I was so worried. You should have seen me driving from school to JJ’s … it’s a miracle I didn’t get a ticket since I was driving like a maniac.”
“I know you worry about me, and I appreciate your concern, but you, of all people should know that I can handle a lot. I handled tonight. Everything turned out fine. But I still don’t understand why me being dressed like this made you so mad.”
Connor shifts his eyes to look out the front windshield and then shifts them back to me. I follow his gaze as it travels down my body and back up, pausing for a second on my lips. When I do reconnect with his eyes, they are full with emotion and change from emerald to forest green and I can feel that shift come back between us. The cab of his truck fills with a buzzing tension.
He looks at my lips again as he leans over. His hand reaching up to the back of my head and I try not to wince in pain. Our foreheads are touching and his breathing is erratic.
“Harp,” his warm breath brushes my lips when he utters my name. Then his lips are kissing mine. I’m too stunned to do anything. I sit there feeling the warmth of his soft lips until he pulls away from me, suddenly leaving me hollow and cold. I realize I want his warmth back on me again … I bring my hands up to touch his face and pull his gaze back to mine, searching his glassy dark green eyes.
We sit there for what feels like an eternity, letting years of friendship surround us and I can’t move. I can’t do anything but think about his lips on my lips. I look down to his mouth and back up to his eyes.
He leans in and kisses the corner of my mouth and then he’s over my lips again, and this time I don’t sit still, I join him and feel friendship and passion. I get drunk on the total euphoria taking over my body. I move my hands into his hair pulling him closer to me. He teases my lips with his tongue and I respond opening my lips to him, causing a moan to escape from the back of my throat. I can’t get enough and I don’t want him to stop. His hand reaches the back of my head so I pull away breathing hard, and pull his hand into mine.
“So ….” I say looking down at our hands in my lap.
“So ….” He says back. I look up at him and see a smile pulling across his face and his eyes are a shimmering bright sea of green.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that, Harp.”
I look back down to hide the ridiculous blush that I can feel creeping up my chest, neck and face. But Connor knows me too well, and he chuckles, lifting my head with his finger under my chin.
“Don’t hide from me, ever. You have nothing to be embarrassed about with me,” he says before tucking a piece of my hair behind my ear. “I know we have a lot to talk about, but we’ll have to do that after Ethan and Emma leave ‘cause they are pulling in now and we need to go inside.”
Between the kiss and the throbbing in my head, I’ve lost the ability to speak, so I nod in agreement.
“You’re staying with me tonight, right?”
“Um, yeah … Emma’s got my overnight bag in her car.”
“Good, we’ll talk then.”
Connor gets out of the truck to greet Ethan and Emma. I see Emma hold up bags from the grocery store with a giant smile on her face and I chuckle. I open my door and as I start to climb out, the ground becomes fuzzy. I shake my head to clear the cobwebs, but it doesn’t help, and I end up falling out of the truck into a pair of strong, familiar arms.
“Hey, are you ok?”
“Oh my God! What happened?” I hear Emma say.
Crap. The pressure against my head must have gotten to me and now—my headache is twice as bad as it was before.
“Take me inside, I just need some water. I need to sit down … too much stress tonight,” I manage to get out.
“You need ice cream, it solves everything,” Emma says seriously. “Come on, Harp, I got four cartons of ice cream all different flavors, so let’s dig in. I promise Ben & Jerry will make you feel better.”
Connor and I follow behind them, but when we get to the door he pauses, “Go ahead and get what you need from the kitchen and go downstairs, we’ll be there in a minute. I just want to talk to Harp real quick.”
He turns me to face him, and in an attempt to look strong and brave, I stare straight into his worried eyes.
“What happened when you stumbled out of the truck? As much as I’d like to think that was your reaction from my kiss, I know it wasn’t. Is there something wrong? Did Vincent touch you?”
“No, no, he didn’t do anything tonight. I promise. I told you everything that happened.”
“Then tell me, what was that about? Huh?”
“Nothing, it was the kiss. You know, now I understand why every girl in school throws herself at you,” I joke hoping to get him to back off.
“I know you’re lying to me right now and I don’t like it. I’m gonna ask again … what happened?”
Ugh. I can’t keep anything from him.
I look down and exhale, “I got in a fight with my mom tonight after school.”
“What did she do?” he says through gritted teeth.
“She found out about Oberlin and she lost it. I fell down in the bathtub and hit my head on the shower wall,” I look back up at him, “But I’m fine I promise … I feel better now. Really, I just need some ice cream and I’ll be good as new.”
“No. Harp. This is not ok. You …”
“Hey, what’s going on out here? We’ve been waiting for you guys downstairs—let’s go, come on. We need to celebrate,” he grabs me. Thank God for Ethan and his impeccable timing.
When we get downstairs, I can’t help but smile. Emma’s got all four containers of ice cream open on the coffee table and is holding a spoon out at me.
“Ice cream time!” She sings.
I laugh and take the spoon from her “Well, what flavors do we have here?”
“Americone Dream, Chunky Monkey, Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough and of course Cherry Garcia.”
“I don’t know which flavor I want first …”
“Why don’t you start on the left side and I’ll start on the right and then we can switch?”
“Excellent idea!”
I try my first spoonful of Cherry Garcia and its creamy sweetness soothes my palate as I look up and see Ethan and Connor playing darts.
“What do you think the guys are talking about? They look so serious,” I ask Emma.
“Hmmm … they do look serious. Probably just talking about the game, and strategy, you know? Sports stuff. Who cares? Let’s enjoy our ice cream. How about a movie?”
She turns on the large flat screen TV and finds Mean Girls on one of the cable stations. We settle into the couch alternating our containers of ice cream and laughing.
“Harp, baby, wake up, its time for bed.”
I’m woken up by the sound of Connor’s voice gently easing me from my slumber.
“What happened? What time is it?” I mumble.
Connor chuckles, “It’s midnight. You fell asleep on the couch watching a movie with Emma. They just left. Let’s get you to bed.”
“Mmmhmmm,” I yawn in agreement.
Connor helps me from the couch and I lean on him as we climb the first and second set of stairs to his room. On any other night I would have just crawled right into his bed without thinking. But once we’re in his room with the door shut, my mind wakes up and I remember the kiss from his truck, and I am suddenly very self-conscious.
“Here’s your bag. I’ll be back in a minute,” he says.
Once he’s gone, I go to his bathroom to change into my pajamas, wash my face free from all the makeup Emma put on me, and then brush my teeth.
“Its just Connor, Harp. Get a grip,” I say to my reflection in the mirror. The girl looking back at me looks so plain compared to the girl from just a few hours earlier. I wonder if Connor only kissed me because I looked so different before.
Hoping I’
m done first, I peak around his bathroom door. When I don’t see him, I open the door the rest of the way and make a mad dash for the bed. As soon as I’m on it, I hear Connor laughing.
“Trying to beat me and pretend you’re asleep?”
My mouth drops open, “I, uh … no … I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I tell him dismissively.
He continues to laugh and shake his head, “Get in bed. I’m going to turn out the lights.”
I do as he says and soon feel the bed shift under his weight.
“Harp open your eyes. It’s just me.”
“Only if you stop laughing at me.”
I hear him chuckle, “Ok, ok … I’m done laughing. Now, will you please open your eyes?”
I take a deep breath and slowly open my eyes. We are lying side by side, facing each other. Connor moves his hand up to my face, and tucks a piece of hair behind my ear before grazing my cheek with his thumb.
“You are so beautiful,” he whispers.
Thankfully, it’s dark and he can’t see me blush. His words and closeness … I’ve never had anyone tell me that before. It feels nice but I’m reluctant to believe it.
“Stop doubting yourself.” he says kissing my right cheek.
“You are talented,” he says kissing my forehead.
“And smart,” he’s kissing the tip of my nose.
“And the most beautiful person I know inside and out,” He’s hovering over my lips. I look into his eyes as he watches his thumb trace my lips.
I close my eyes and feel my heart flutter. My stomach flips like I’m on a roller coaster just starting to take the dip down after the long climb up. I open my eyes and see him looking at me.
“I know this seems sudden for you, but Harp, I’ve liked you for a long time. There’s never been anyone else, even though I’ve tried to get you out of my mind by dating other girls. No one can compare to you. I want us to be … together.”
I see his eyes are filled with genuine emotion. I know he’s waiting on me but I don’t know what to say, so instead I lean into him. I’m so close that our lips are slightly touching, and I can feel the warmth of his breath on me again. I close my eyes and kiss him tenderly.
We pull apart and a smile tugs at my lips, “Ok.”
Harp's Song Page 6