Blush

by Anne Mercier

  Before I even get center stage, the lights are on me. I'm an actress. I can do this. I'm Luciana Fucking Russo-Kingston.

  “How the hell are you doing tonight, Portland?“ Again, a roar washes over me. I look over to Sera. “Did you hear something?“

  She shakes her head. “Nah. Looks like no one came to rock with us.“

  “Well, shit. Really Portland? Let's try this again. How the hell are you doing tonight, Portland!“ This time a deafening roar floods over us.

  “Now that's what I'm talking about,“ Meggie says into her mic.

  “In case you don't know who we are, we're Blush and we're here to open for this little band you might have heard of somewhere. You know, a band called Falling Down?“

  Roar. I laugh.

  “Yeah, I thought you might have heard of them. What do you say we get started entertaining these fan-fucking-tastic fans, Blush?“

  With that, Trace beats the hell out of his drums and then into the rhythm of our first song. The rest follow suit. And then I begin to sing, nerves long forgotten.

  “Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.“

  —ANN LANDERS

  “THEY'RE KICKING ASS,“ I tell the guys.

  “You doubted them?“ Ben asks.

  “Nah. It's just cool as fuck.“

  “True that. Let's see how they feel about us performing together,“ Ethan remarks.

  Yeah, that'll be telling. True acceptance of me and Luce or a great big fuck you. I hope it's the former. Watching her out there brings me so much pride. She owns that fucking stage, pulling in the crowd like a seasoned veteran and I didn't even coach her.

  “She's a fucking natural,“ I mutter to no one in particular.

  “Fuck yeah, she is,“ Xander agrees. “They're tearing it up. We better bring our A game tonight.“

  Kennedy grunts and nods. “Christ, did you see that move she just did?“

  “Hell. I'm going to have to go out on stage sporting wood,“ I tell them.

  “I think we all are. Shit. Sera just...“ Ben says and shakes his head.

  Yeah. Sera just lifted her guitar out of the way and rubbed up on Jace's leg, threw her head back, and I swear to fuck she just came right there.

  “How much time do we have, Damian? I need to go rub one out before we go out there,“ Xander mutters, eyes glued to the stage, serious as a heart attack. I'd laugh, but I might have to do the same.

  Damian chuckles. “Fuck, dude. I can't blame you but no time. Next song is when you're joining in.“

  “Damn it,“ Xander mutters, adjusting himself.

  “Good Christ. Did you see that?“ Kennedy asks.

  I nod. Yeah, I sure as hell did see Lucy rubbing up on Meggie from behind, then reaching around to finger the strings. I look at Damian who is as transfixed as the rest of us.

  “Did they practice that?“

  He shakes his head.

  Damn. Hot. As. Fuck. It's my turn to adjust myself.

  “So Portland, what'd you think? Did we give you what you came to see? What you wanted? What you needed?“ Lucy asks the crowd. With each question the roar gets louder.

  “Well, we've got a little more for you,“ Sera yells into the mic. “And we've got some friends who are going to join us for this one.“

  “That's our cue,“ I say aloud.

  “Hell fucking yeah,“ Xander shouts, tapping his sticks.

  We make our way on stage and there's no way I can stop the smile pulling at my lips. There's my woman—my wife. Waiting for us to join her. I shake my head as a roadie hands me my mic.

  The crowd goes nuts as I reach Lucy and pull her in for a kiss, wrapping my arm around her shoulders. Ben smacks Sera's ass, Ethan fist bumps Jace, and Kennedy hip bumps Meggie. Xander and Trace slap sticks and X makes his way to his drum set. Both fit on this stage, which is fucking kick ass.

  “How the fuck you doing out there, Portland?“ I yell. “What'd you think of Blush? Pretty fucking bad ass if you ask me.“ Roar. “You guys kicked some serious ass. I'm not sure we're going to be able to measure up.“

  “For fucking real,“ Ben chimes in.

  “Dude,“ Kennedy adds.

  “Hell,“ Ethan remarks.

  “I'm still hard back here!“ Xander shouts and the crowd goes wild.

  Lucy just laughs.

  “For real, Luce. We got cameras that can zoom in on this.“ Xander stands up. “Zoom in on this shit right here,“ he says pointing to his dick. The crowd goes wild when they see his hard-on in his pants.

  “Well, look what we inspired!“ Lucy says with a fist pump! “Hmm,“ she adds and reaches down and touches my very hard cock. She raises her brows. “Looks like Xander's not the only one who's hard. My husband has a very impressive erection.“ She licks her lips and I groan.

  “Woman. Why are you so set on torturing me?“

  “It's not torture if I intend on relieving you of your ailment after the show.“

  I grunt. “That's not helping me now,“ I say, adjusting myself again and Portland goes crazy.

  “Dude,“ Ethan chimes in. “We put up with this shit all the time.“

  “True story,“ Sera adds.

  The crowd only roars louder.

  “Well, what do you say we kick the BFD tour off right?“ Xander yells. “Because the Blush-Falling Down tour is a Big. Fucking. Deal.“

  “Hell yeah!“ We all murmur our agreement.

  “We've got a little song we want to sing for you,“ Kennedy tells the crowd.

  Meggie leans in to where they're sharing a mic. “From what I've seen, there is nothing ‘little' at all on this stage.“

  “Again, true story,“ Sera says.

  Lucy just laughs and I pull her in for a kiss to her forehead.

  “Are you ready, Portland? What?“ she yells. “I still can't hear you!“

  I nod to Trace and Xander and we start singing Falling Down. It seems like yesterday we wrote this song in the tattoo parlor. Looking at Lucy's side and shoulder, her tats are sexy as hell. She wants more, of course, but she's going to wait for Harley. I think she might be a little sweet on the big guy. She calls him her teddy bear and Harley eats that shit up like it's candy. Who can blame him?

  And here she is, my wife, rubbing up on my leg. Shit.

  I scream out the next line and she joins in on the next. Lucy looks to me and says, “It looks to me like they know this song! Let's see if they know the chorus!“

  We start singing to help them out, then hold up our mics and the crowd sings the words perfectly. Fuck yeah.

  Lucy's grin's a mile wide and she does a quick spin on her toe, some ballet shit I think. Looked sexy as hell and I know she did it because she's so happy she can't contain it. Likely she'll get off stage and cry for a few minutes if I know my woman. She has such a hard time controlling her emotions when they fill her up the way her happy is right now. That's her phrasing, not mine.

  I tap a finger to the tip of her nose and she starts singing the next verse. Before we know it, it's over and Blush is saying their goodbyes. Their first major show on the BFD tour was a huge fucking success.

  “I'm not sure we can compete with Blush. They kicked some major ass! What do you think Portland? Do you think we can give them a run for their money?“ I growl into the mic. They don't let me down, our fans never do. They growl right back.

  “I'm still not sure, but we'll give it a try.“ Xander starts us off and I'm lost. Lost in the music, lost in the crowd, lost in the chords, lost in the beat, lost in the rhythm, and lost in the love of it all. My adrenaline is pumping as I sing, growl, and sing my soul out for each and every person in the audience, backstage, and for those who will likely see this on a bootlegged copy of the show posted on YouTube. Without music, I wouldn't be me. Without music, I wouldn't be whole.

  Without Luc
y, I'd be nothing and that's why I've got a little surprise planned. We're on the last song and the guys send me a wink. They know what I've got in mind, as do the members of Blush, Cage, and Damian and they've helped me set it up.

  As I introduce the last song, I put a finger to my lips and say, “Shhh.“ I hope the crowd catches on and doesn't give it away. The roadies rush on stage and begin setting up and that's when we all put a finger to our lips and whisper “Shhh“ into our mics but keep right on playing.

  The song ends and the crowd cheers. I'm sweaty from the lights and exertion, but now I'm sweating for an entirely different reason. Hell. Meggie, Jace, and Trace are standing just off stage and I motion them forward. Sera's in back distracting Lucy. Hopefully Lucy will cooperate and do what Sera guides her to do. Knowing my woman, this may not go off as well as I'd planned.

  “Portland, you were one kick ass crowd tonight! I'd like to do one last song. It's a little different from our usual stuff. It's one we wrote two nights ago and it's a ballad and I'd like to invite Blush up here to help us out.“

  The crowd cheers and Meggie, Jace, and Trace join us on stage. I'm sweating bullets. My heart's beating out of my chest. I feel like I need to throw up. Shit. Still no Sera and Lucy. I stall waiting for Blush to get set up, Ben starts talking to the crowd. I take a breath. Sera walks on stage shaking her head. Fuck.

  “Alright, Portland. Looks like I need a little help from you. It seems Lucy hasn't found her way to the stage yet. What do you say we call her out?“

  Xander stands up, knocks his sticks together and chants “Lu-cy! Lu-cy! Lu-cy!“ The rest of us join in and it takes mere seconds for the crowd to join us.

  “Louder!“ Xander shouts.

  They roar out her name and before long I see Damian signal to me from off stage. I signal to the lighting techs who drown us in darkness, except for the candles lit up on the stage highlighting a trail of rose petals that lead right to me, where I stand in the middle of a shit-ton of candles set out to the shape of a heart.

  I watch Lucy ask Damian what's going on. He shrugs, making it seem like he has no idea what's going on. Guess he's not such a fucker after all. Cage steps up behind Lucy and covers her eyes with his hand. He says something into her ear and she laughs. They start heading out onto the stage and the second the fans see her, they let out a thunderous cheer. Her brows pinch together but she's still smiling. I know she can see the rose petals beneath her feet and the candles when her hand flies up to her heart, then her mouth. She tries to look up but Cage anticipates her move and moves with her.

  “Uh, uh, uh, no peeking there, Luce,“ Kennedy teases.

  Her head tilts to the side and she laughs, her hand resting against her heart.

  When they reach me, I introduce him. “Cage Nichols, everybody!“

  They scream. Cage whispers to Lucy, kisses her cheek, then removes his hand before he sends out a wave to the crowd and makes his way off stage.

  “What's going on, Jesse?“ she asks, her eyes wide, her hand at her throat. She's nervous and, hell, so am I.

  “Lucy,“ I begin, waiting for the noise to die down. “There's this song…“

  She laughs. I tilt my mic toward her. “There's always a song.“

  “True, true. But this one is different. It's one we wrote; it's not our usual style; but it's one that delivers the message loud and clear.“

  She says, “Okay,“ but no one can hear her. A roadie comes up with a pink stool for her to sit on. She raises a brow and I grab one of her hands, helping her take her seat.

  “Ready?“ Ethan asks. I nod.

  The music starts, Lucy's smile floats into my soul, soothing me, making my heart flutter and the words pour out from deep within.

  There have been times

  When my words didn't rhyme

  There have been seasons

  When my life didn't have a reason

  Then came you

  There have been days

  When I walked in a haze

  Walking down a dead end street

  In crowds I'd feel incomplete

  Then came you

  Then came you, my love, my heart

  Then came you, and I never want to be apart

  Then came you, my passion, my soul

  Then came you, only you can make me whole

  Please stay forever

  There've been so many places

  And so many forgotten faces

  So many meaningless hours

  I want them to matter, I want them to be ours

  Please stay with me

  I see your face and I smile

  I touch your skin and I feel you within (my soul)

  Let's tackle your fears

  I'll wipe your tears

  If you stay with me

  Stay with me forever

  Stay in my life

  Stay with me forever

  Baby, be my wife

  Say you will

  Say you can be

  Say you want to

  Say you will please marry me

  Stay with me forever

  Marry me, be my wife, be my forever

  Only you, always you, forever you.

  There she sits. My lovely, gorgeous, beautiful, soul-ravaging wife, tears streaming down her face. I get down on one knee and take her hand in mine, her other hand flies up to her mouth. The crowd gasps and cheers and whistles.

  “Baby, don't cry. You know it kills me.“

  “I can't help it.“

  “I know we're already married, but I'd like to do this right. You deserve that. You deserve better than me, better than this, but this is all I've got. This,“ I motion around us, “and my love, my heart, hell, my soul. They all belong to you. Will you do me the honor of being my wife? Living with me, loving me, having babies with me, growing old with me? I'll always take care of you, love you with all that I am, and I will love you in this life and beyond. Say yes. Luciana Antonia Russo-Kingston, please be my wife. Be my forever.“

  She doesn't pause. She falls to her knees and wraps her arms around my neck. Sera runs up with a mic and thrusts it into Lucy's face. Lucy sniffles then pulls back, cups both of my cheeks in her hands, looks me straight in the eyes, and without hesitation tells me, “The honor is mine, Jesse Kingston. I would love to be your wife, your love, your life, your soul. Then we'll be on even ground and nothing would make me happier. Everything I have, everything I am, is yours. Forever and beyond.“

  Then I do what any man whose heart is leaping up into his throat would do, I pull the love of my life close and kiss her softly, sweetly, telling her without words how fucking happy I am in this moment. She undoes me. She unravels me. I couldn't speak if I wanted to. She's my everything and she's my forever. We're going to do this right. Lucy deserves the proposal, the white dress, the champagne fountain, and the big-ass cake and I'm going to make fucking sure she gets just that. Nothing less than perfect for my wife. Ever.

  “I love you, Luciana Russo-Kingston.“

  “I love you, Jesse Kingston.“ She giggles and the crowd goes crazy. I mean crazy. Feet stomping, screaming, cheering, whistling. Then they start chanting and at first I can't make out what they're saying but Lucy does. I can tell. Her posture rigid and stiff, her smile fake as she shakes her head.

  “Blush Baby,“ she tells me in my ear. I know she hates that. She hated it in Vegas and she's hated it every minute since. She doesn't want to be singled out from the band. She wants them to be a unit. She meets my gaze head on. “It's time to look for a Blush Baby.“

  Well, that's certainly one way to handle it. I'd have let it die, but Lucy is Lucy and she tackles shit hard.

  I stand up and hold out a hand for her. I wrap my arms around her and pull her close, she climbs up my body and I chuckle. My wife the monkey. That reminds me of the night we sang Shock the Monkey and the crazy drunk sex we had. Fuck, that was hot. She clings to me and laughs as the crowd continues to go crazy. Sera hands her her mic.

  “One last son
g, Portland?“

  The crowd yells out their affirmation that they want more, more, more.

  I look at the guys who just grin and nod their heads.

  “One more song,“ I agree.

  “HOW DID YOU hide my mama?“ Lucy asks as she hugs Regina tight. I'm about to answer her when some fans come barreling up.

  “Oh Jesse,“ the blonde one purrs, running her hand over my chest. Her fake tits nearly falling out of her skintight halter top, her pants obviously a size too small, her makeup caked on, and her lips painted fire engine red. She's the farthest thing from attractive as I've ever seen. Even with beer goggles she'd be one I'd pass over.

  Her friend, a brunette, who is a little more conservative with a tight Falling Down tank top and tight jeans, starts rubbing her equally fake tits against my chest. Now her I might have gone for.

  “What can I do for you ladies?“ I ask with a smile.

  Blondie thrusts a CD at me. “Can you autograph this for me? Pretty please?“ Her hand slides up over my arm, up my biceps to my shoulder and she leans in so her breasts press against my side.

  “Whoa,“ I hear Sera murmur.

  Xander groans. “And so it begins.“

  “Sure thing, darlin'. Who do I make this out to?“

  “My name's Darla and my friend here is Cindy. We'd be willing to share you if you're up for a little company,“ she bats her eyelashes.

  Her friend steps up and slides her hand over my abs and down to my belt loop where she hooks her fingers. I sign Darla's CD and hand it back to her.

  “What about you, sugar?“ I ask Cindy.

  She hands me a CD of her own and then asks me to sign her chest, just above her breast so she can have it tattooed. A bit aggressive but nothing I'm not used to.

  She hands me a Sharpie and I lean in to sign where she points. She pulls her top down, exposing both her breasts and I let out a chuckle.

  “There you go. Anything else I can do for you?“ I ask.

  “Yeah,“ Cindy breathes, leaning against me, her fingers unhooking from my belt loop to slide, palm down, over my hip straight over my cock. I stifle a groan. I'm still hard from Lucy's tight little body wrapped around mine. I need to shake these two off, maybe pass them off to Xander or Ethan, so I can get my wife alone. I've never needed anything more in my entire life than I need to fuck my wife right now.