by Anna Kyss
I nod. Our relationship seems to be moving to a new level, so there’s something poetic about going back to the magical tree where it all began.
“I won’t be able to get you to class in time.” He’s still hesitant. “And tomorrow’s Monday. The loggers will be there, for sure. It might be too risky.”
“I can cut class for once.” I shrug like it’s no big deal.
“Come on, you’ve probably never skipped class in your life.” He glances at me to confirm it.
“There’s a first for everything.” I place my hand over his. “Besides, rebelling’s really working out for me tonight.”
“If you’re sure…”
“I am.” I’m sure that I want to pursue this chemistry that’s brewing between us. I’m sure I want to keep expanding my horizons and discovering more about myself. “One request. Can we stop at a real bathroom first?”
Growing up in the city, I never really experienced the true blackness of the night. The dim moonlight doesn’t penetrate the treetops. Inky darkness surrounds us, making the trail impossible to see. Soul has only the tiniest of flashlights, and its dim beam barely reaches the trail.
“Sorry I’m not better prepared. I never hike out here at nighttime.”
Since the trail is only wide enough for one person, I press right behind Soul and grasp his upper arms. He’s not built like a workout junkie, but his arms are completely toned. As he moves his flashlight, his muscles ripple beneath his thin T-shirt.
“I’m lucky that I keep my climbing bag in my trunk. At least we have gear.” He’s completely focused on getting to the tree. “Are you doing okay, Maddie?”
Something swoops overhead—a bat, maybe—and I wrap one arm around his waist, pressing myself even closer. My hand rests right on his stomach, which is flat and as hard as his upper arms. “I’m good.”
More than good. I’ve always been a little skittish, but now I have full license to use Soul as my own personal security blanket. I have no shame in taking advantage of that.
“Maybe you’d be more comfortable up here.” He pulls me in front of him then holds me tightly against his chest, resting his hands on the small open space between my T-shirt and my sweats. Soul’s chin rests gently on my head. His gentle breaths tickle my hair each time he exhales.
I love the feeling of his warm hands on my exposed skin, but I’m frustrated by not being able to touch him myself. I can’t believe I’m getting so hot and heavy in the forest. “Why was the tree left unattended?”
“Apple brought his girlfriend up, but she freaked out, had some kind of panic attack, so he drove her home.” Soul stops for a moment. “I can’t get too mad about it because that could have been me.”
I swing around. He doesn’t loosen his grip, so I remain encircled by his arms. “You think I would have an anxiety attack from climbing a tree?”
“Not anymore. But I wasn’t sure how a prim-and-proper sorority girl would handle squatting in a tree.” He sighs. “I didn’t even consider how bringing you could affect our movement.”
“Why did you bring me to the tree?” I look up at him but can’t make out his expression in the dark.
He cups my face in both hands. “I must have seen a hint of Adventurous Maddie, hiding underneath all that makeup and fancy dress. I wanted to free her.”
“I think you were successful.” I hook my arm behind his head, pulling my body flush with his.
“Ready to climb again?” he whispers.
I take his flashlight and shine it behind Soul. The tall and majestic tree stands right at his back. In the darkness, I didn’t even notice it. “I’m ready.”
I can’t tell what question I’m answering, but I am ready. Ready to soar high into the air again. Ready to open my heart and body to someone new again. Ready for those sexy lips to finally meet mine. I’m ready.
Soul kneels in front of me and opens his backpack. He hands me the first harness, which I slip over my shoulders, then Soul starts fastening it at the bottom. He cinches a strap around my upper thigh then seems to triple check that it’s latched tightly in place. I’m wearing sweatpants this time, but his touch seems bolder. All five fingers circle my thigh, with only his middle finger resting on the strap. Through my sweats, his other fingers tease the delicate skin underneath. A small sigh escapes me.
“It’s dark. I have to be extra cautious.” He moves on to my left thigh, cinching the strap, then circumnavigating my leg with all those teasing fingers. Once, twice, and finally, three times.
My body’s more taut than the harness straps.
He traces the straps up, over the exposed sliver of my belly to the swell of my chest. When he grasps the upper straps, his thumbs lead the way, tracing a path across my breasts, before latching the strap firmly in place. He passes his fingers along the tight strap the requisite three times. I wish he needed to check twenty more times.
“We’re heading up together tonight.” He quickly latches himself into his own harness then attaches each of us to a separate line leading to the platform. He secures the sole flashlight to my harness. “See you at the top!”
For a moment, I watch him ascend gracefully, but he quickly disappears from the flashlight’s beam. I tug clumsily at the rope, try to rest my sneakers against the tree, and move upward. After climbing only once before, the movements still don’t come naturally.
After a few minutes, I begin to gain momentum, hauling myself higher and higher. The climb is surreal in the dark. I can’t see anything, despite the tiny trickle of light escaping the flashlight, but the forest is alive with noises. The wind whistles through the branches, causing the leaves to make a percussion-like rustle. Every few minutes, something flutters through the air, and far below, scurrying sounds carry upward.
“The nocturnals,” Soul whispers in my ear.
I nearly jump out of my harness. Thankfully, he secured it tightly enough that I just jerk awkwardly then dangle in mid-air. He must be able to see me in the dim beam of the flashlight, but I can barely make him out. “Not funny, Soul. You nearly gave me a heart attack!”
He reaches for my harness and locks legs with me. Instinctively, I wrap my arms around his neck. Our motions cause us to twirl around together.
“My apologies. I planned on making your heart race, but not due to fear.” His hands are free, and he uses them to gently cup my face.
He’s achieving his desired effect. My heart beats faster and faster as we dangle nearly a hundred feet off the ground, completely entangled with one another.
“I’ve wanted to do this all evening long.” His breath tickles my cheek. “But I wanted it to be memorable, just like you.”
The flashlight points up, illuminating the sexy expression on his face. I don’t trust myself to say anything.
Soul lowers his lips to mine. For a moment, his motions are so tender that his kisses feel as soft as whispers. Still, even those gentle motions fuel the fire that’s been kindling between us. I grasp his neck even more firmly and press myself as close as can be.
That’s all the encouragement he needs. Soul crushes his lips to mine. He runs his fingers through my hair then pulls gently, until I open my mouth to him. Our tongues mimic our entwined bodies’ dance. Somehow, my legs have wrapped around his waist, and we swing round and round, our lips never separating.
When he finally breaks away, I can’t tell if minutes or hours have passed. I rest my forehead against his shoulder and concentrate on slowing my breathing.
“Memorable?” He smooths my hair behind my ear.
That was the hottest kiss I’ve ever had. I have only Andrew’s to compare it to, but Soul’s sky-high kiss was more unforgettable than anything else I’ve experienced.
“Maddie? Are you okay?”
I’m more than okay. I’m bathed in sensations I didn’t even know existed. “How quickly can we make it to the platform?”
Grasping each of our lines, he yanks us up the remaining distance, far faster than I ever could have done. “Hold
on,” he whispers excitedly.
I’ve been holding on for weeks now. Why do those few minutes to the top feel like forever?
Soul
WHEN WE finally make it to the platform, Maddie starts to impatiently unstrap her harness. As much as I want to let her remove the straps that form a barrier between us, I can’t take any risks up here. I have to think about her safety first.
I shake my head and attach her to the platform’s main guideline. “I wish we could unstrap up here, but—”
“Yeah, we need to follow the safety rules for the good of the trees. I remember.” She lets out a long, disappointed sigh.
“That doesn’t mean we can’t continue where we left off.” After snapping myself onto the other line, I grab a thick blanket and spread it across the platform. I lie on my back in the middle of the blanket and pat the space next to me.
Maddie slips off her shoes then lowers herself—not onto the blanket, but on top of me. Totally not what I had planned, but I’m not complaining. She straddles me, running her hands up and down under my T-shirt.
Who would have imagined that the straitlaced girl I met on the train could become such a vixen after one kiss? Not that I’m complaining. No, I’m not complaining at all.
Maddie starts at my cheek and trails a row of soft kisses from cheek to lip. When she reaches my piercing, she doesn’t seem to know what to do. She runs her tongue hesitantly around the ring. When I sigh, she takes that section of my lip in her mouth, tugging gently.
My hands nearly circle her tiny waist. I press her down tightly against me, but it’s not enough. I want so much more.
“I have my tree name,” she whispers. “How about Rebel?”
“Sounds hot.” I give the delicate skin along her neck more attention, loving how she moans in response.
“We could have the ultimate rebellion up here,” she suggests.
I freeze. I know what she’s hinting about, and I want to—so badly. But I don’t want it to be a one-night rebellious act that she regrets in the morning. My feelings have been growing for a while, and tonight, they’ve shot sky-high.
I haven’t let myself get close to many people. Too many things can happen. Accidents. Sickness. I’ve experienced the worst of it all. At some point, I decided I don’t want a one-night thing with Maddie. I want more.
“Well?” she whispers. Her breath tickles my ear, leaving shivers of pleasure in its wake.
“I don’t want to be your rebellion,” I force myself to say.
She climbs off me and sits on the blanket, staring out into the blackness. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be so—”
“No!” I take her hand and begin to trace a shape across her palm. “It took every ounce of willpower for me to say that, because I want—really, desperately want—our sexy times to continue.”
“But?” She watches my finger as it continues its path along her palm. Curving out then sliding down to a point.
“Take a few days and think about what you really want.” I trace another heart. “I want to make sure you have no regrets.”
“It’s funny how the true gentlemen is pierced, tattooed, and wears Converses.” She cuddles up next to me, resting her head on my chest. “I don’t think I’m going to change my mind.”
“I sure hope not!” I hold her even closer and kiss the top of her head.
A few days. I can wait a few more days.
A whining sound cuts through my sleep. Usually, I take catnaps while I’m squatting, but last night, I zonked out. That’s only the second time I’ve slept so hard up here. The first time involved cuddling up to Maddie’s soft curves, as well. She must be the world’s sexiest pillow.
I force my eyes open. Her left arm’s splayed across my chest, while her head rests in the crook between my shoulder and arm. Our legs are entwined, like they wanted to replicate our suspended kiss.
The noise transforms into a throaty growl, followed by a sharp crack.
“Timber!” a man yells, far below.
“Shit! Wake up, Maddie.” I shake her shoulder, but she’s already rousing.
“What’s wrong?” She rubs the sleep from her eyes.
I wish I could just lock us into this moment. Her red locks are radiant in the light of the rising sun. The fact that her hair’s so messy, with strands poking in every direction, just makes her look cuter, more real. She washed away her normal makeup when we cleaned up from skinny-dipping, and her fresh face glows in the pale-pink morning light.
“We have trouble, beautiful.”
She blinks in response to my last word. “You’ve never called me that before. Wait, what kind of trouble?”
“You’ve never looked so real before.” I force myself to separate from her and stand up.
She watches me survey the surrounding forest then stands herself. “What kind of trouble?”
The chainsaw’s growl intensifies again, closer this time. A group of men cut a spruce that’s only yards away. After a few moments, there’s another loud crack, and the loggers cheer.
The tree doesn’t fall in the direction they intended. Instead, it heaves toward us, missing one of Grandmother’s branches by only a few feet. The platform shudders when the spruce hits the ground.
“Hey!” I scream over the chainsaw’s buzz. “You almost hit us!”
“The forest’s a dangerous place when we’re working,” one of the men yells back. “I suggest you leave your tree and go home.”
“Yeah, we wouldn’t want you to get hurt,” another logger jeers.
“They’ve never openly antagonized us,” I say quietly, so only Maddie can hear. “Usually, they keep their distance and work closer to the clear-cut area.”
Maddie stares out at the changed forest. Two gaps exist where the trees’ leafy canopies once stood. Tears roll down her face.
“Are you okay?” I draw her closer to me and embrace her. “That was scary as hell. Hopefully, they’ll stop since we made it clear we’re still up here.”
“I’m not scared.”
“Nobody would blame you.” I hold her a bit tighter. “Shit, that even messed with me. I’ve never seen them come so close to the tree before.”
“I’m so glad you answered your phone last night.” She wipes away her tears. “To be honest, I was kind of upset you let the phone interrupt us.”
“Oh, yeah?” She covered that well. I had no idea.
“But if we weren’t up here, they would have chopped her down.” She looks at me with teary eyes. “They would have just wiped out this centuries-old tree.”
“That’s the idea behind squatting up here.” The new gaps in the forest haunt me. I point to where the spruce used to stand. “That tree housed a pair of boreal owls. They were nesting, but I’m not sure if they had any young yet.”
“How do you know?”
“I spend a lot of hours up here, alone,” I say. “I used to track the male. He flew away at the same time every evening. The female seemed to stay closer to her nest.”
“If they had babies, I should go down and search the fallen tree. Maybe we could save them.” Maddie stands, like she’s preparing to descend.
“No, it’s too dangerous.” I pull her back into a hug. The whole morning is so disappointing that I just want to keep my arms wrapped around her. “We can’t leave while the loggers are here. In other sits, activists have reported getting injured or arrested after face-to-face confrontations.”
She shakes off my embrace and heads over to my backpack. After digging through it, she grabs her small pink notebook. “I’m so glad I had this with me last night.”
“What are you going to do?” I tease. “Rain angry little notes down on their heads?”
After all these months, I’m starting to doubt whether we can save this forest. I mean, they just cut down two trees that were right in Grandmother’s shadow. If the loggers are going to take risks like that, I don’t know where their stopping point might be.
If I can’t even save a tree, when I’m in the d
amn forest, I don’t know how I’m going to help my best friend from halfway across the country. Sage had another procedure scheduled for today. I was supposed to be back in Boulder, by my phone, where I could check on him. Who knows how long we’ll be stuck up here?
I can’t help but worry that I’m about to lose everything and everyone I care about.
Maddie scribbles away in her notebook. After a half hour, she weaves her pen back in the spiral binding of the notebook. “I’m going to document everything we’ve seen today. I want every CU student to be able to visualize the beauty of an old-growth patch and cringe at how the loggers are destroying it.”
She sounds like I felt a few months ago: idealistic, hopeful, and ready to change the world. Now, I’m just pissed I couldn’t save a few damn trees. The thing that makes me the angriest is that the fallen trees are going to sit and rot. The logging roads don’t extend this far in, so the loggers can’t even get their equipment up here to retrieve the trees they’ve just cut down. Those spruces are a message to the tree-sitters.
I hear their “fuck you” loud and clear. But they picked the wrong activist to screw with.
Maddie
THE LOGGERS finally leave around dusk, but we’re still stuck in the tree, waiting for someone to replace us. Soul remained quiet throughout most of the day. At times, he glared at the newly formed gaps then returned to his brooding.
I can’t imagine how devastated he must be. I cried, and it was only my second time in the forest. After working so many months to save the trees, he must take each loss personally.
I don’t mind the solitude, though. It’s kind of refreshing in a way. Being able to spend the day together, without feeling the need to entertain one another, makes our budding relationship feel more real.
I spent the day writing. I had enough research notes jotted down to write a multi-page feature. When combined with my personal experiences, it wouldn’t all fit in one article, so I decided to write a series on Colorado’s deforestation.
If I submit the first part tomorrow, it should appear in Friday’s paper. The newspaper is run by my journalism class. The class has met only twice since I signed up, but I loved every minute. Instead of the lecture-based learning my psychology professors favor, Journalism takes a hands-on approach. In class, we edit, proofread, and layout the next edition before sending it off to the printers.