by Phoebe Conn
Gradually Raven became aware of the distinct possibility that he had never really made love before, for Eden affected his emotions far more strongly than any of his previous partners ever had. He did not know how many women there had been, too many perhaps, but the physical release they had given him had never been preceded with such loving affection as this.
While he was no longer able to fight the attraction he had always felt for Eden, Raven still could not forgive her for enticing Alex into marriage. They were two entirely separate considerations in his mind, one purely pleasure, the other unbearable pain. For now he intended to take every joy she could provide, and later he would allow his anger free rein.
Lost in her own precious memories, Eden lay bathed in the heady enchantment of her husband’s affection. Her whole body felt gloriously alive, as sensitive to his touch as she had been on their wedding night. As always, he did not rush her, but instead allowed her to lead him ever deeper into the magical beauty of love. When at her urging he finally brought their bodies together as one, it was with the same exquisite tenderness he had always shown. He moved slowly, allowing her need for him to heighten until she clung to him, her motions mirroring his until they were both consumed in a heated rush of ecstasy. As that rapturous sensation began to ebb, they remained together still, their arms and legs entangled in a lovers’ embrace.
When Raven could again draw a deep breath, he began to cover Eden’s flushed cheeks with adoring kisses. Her lashes fluttered slightly, and then she opened her eyes. She looked up at him with a gaze that held both puzzlement and sorrow.
“Alex?” she whispered softly, devastated to find her beautiful fantasy was at an end.
“Alex is dead,” Raven replied, and as he spoke those words, the anguish that he had successfully suppressed until that moment suddenly became an unbearable burden. Overwhelmed by the pain of his grief, he buried his face in Eden’s silken curls and wept without shame for the man who had shown him the only love he had ever known.
As responsive as when they had made love, Eden held Raven tightly and murmured every comforting phrase she had ever heard. She knew only too well how much it hurt to have lost Alex, and she didn’t want him to have to suffer that excruciating pain alone. Somehow they had to find the courage to survive the loss of the man who had meant so much to them both. While she had not thought it would be Raven who would need her strength, she nonetheless gave it unsparingly until he at last fell asleep in her arms.
Her lips brushed his black curls with a goodnight kiss, but when Eden closed her eyes, it was again the soft silver sheen of Alex’s hair and the bright blue sparkle of his eyes that filled her dreams.
Chapter Six
August 1863
When Eden awakened late the next morning, Alex’s bedroom was awash in bright sunlight. Enjoying the view of the garden below, Raven was leaning beside one of the leaded windows that framed the massive bed. Arms folded across his chest, he appeared more relaxed than she had ever seen him, and infinitely more attractive. His damp curls glowed with a blue-black sheen and his well-chiseled features were bathed in golden light. He was dressed in tight-fitting black pants and a white shirt, whose loose folds concealed what she now knew to be well-muscled shoulders and arms.
Although Raven felt the warmth of Eden’s gaze, he did not turn away from the window before announcing calmly, “We’ll have to marry.”
Badly startled by that greeting, Eden sat up slowly. Her nightgown lay across the bed within easy reach and she hurriedly pulled it over her head then brushed back her tangled curls. “Raven,” she began hesitantly, certain they would never have a more important conversation, and therefore selecting her words with care, “Last night, well, neither of us was thinking clearly and—”
“I won’t argue with that,” Raven agreed, but he appeared more amused than upset by it.
Choosing to ignore the smile that tugged at the corner of his mouth, Eden continued in an effort to gain control of what she regarded as a most unfortunate situation. “Good. To offer marriage is wonderfully generous of you, but it really isn’t necessary.”
As Raven turned to face her, his dark gaze took on its familiar mocking gleam. “You misunderstood me. I didn’t offer a proposal you could accept or decline. I said we’ll have to marry, today if Robert Boyer will agree to perform the ceremony. Under the circumstances, I’m certain he’ll understand why we don’t wish to invite any guests other than the required number of witnesses.”
Absolutely mortified by his plan, Eden’s mouth fell agape, but she quickly recovered and began to argue. “I’ve been a widow only four days, Raven. To even mention marriage, let alone insist upon it, is so totally inappropriate that—”
This time Raven interrupted her with a rueful laugh. “Not after last night it isn’t.”
In no mood for levity, Eden clasped her hands tightly in her lap and continued as though he had not spoken. To use Raven as a substitute for Alex had been inexcusable, but she refused to compound that error by rushing into marriage when she barely knew him. From now on, she would have to keep her eyes open so no matter how good Raven smelled or tasted she would be able to remember exactly who he was.
“We both loved Alex,” she explained with deliberate care. “It’s only natural that our grief drew us together. We’ll just have to be more careful from now on so that our emotions don’t get the better of us ever again. Neither of us is to blame for what happened last night, so we needn’t allow guilt to force us into what would surely be the worst of marriages.”
Mystified by that dreary prediction, Raven moved to the side of the bed. “What is it you’re after, Eden? When I found you in my bed last night, I thought it was me. I can’t believe you’ve changed your mind. Not after—”
“Your bed?” Eden cried out incredulously. “This is Alex’s bed, our bed. Not yours.”
“No, it’s the earl’s bed, and I want you to share it with me every night we’re at Briarcliff.” Regardless of the ridiculous things Eden was saying now, Raven was positive of that. She had awakened a need within him he had not even suspected he possessed and he intended to have her satisfy it as often as humanly possible.
This was the Raven Eden knew only too well—a cold, arrogant young man whose dark glance had always frightened her. The issue at hand was far too important for her to give in to those fears, however. “You have no right to talk to me like that.”
Eden grabbed ahold of the covers and flung them aside, meaning to leap from the bed, but Raven quickly sat down beside her to block the way. She then had to struggle to pull her nightgown down past her hips but that failed to make her feel sufficiently clothed for a heated argument with him.
Raven considered that tardy show of modesty as puzzling as what he regarded as her feigned show of indignation. Eden had such lovely legs, he was sorry she had covered them. Or was she only teasing him? Expecting a trick, he leaned across her and dropped his right hand to the bed to brace his weight. He had her caught between his arms then, and she could not move off the bed in either direction.
“You were willing to surrender your rights last night, Lady Clairbourne. Why do things seem so different to you by the light of day?”
Angered by his aggressive pose and insulting question, Eden shrank back against the carved headboard. “I want you to leave. I’m not in the habit of carrying on lengthy conversations with men before I’ve left my bed.”
Certain she was teasing him now, Raven’s expression softened as he reached out to trace the curve of her cheek with his left hand. “We needn’t talk if you don’t want to.”
Eden swallowed hard, but that failed to alleviate her growing sense of alarm. She had never felt comfortable around Raven, and at last she realized why. It was not merely the darkness of his coloring that signaled danger, but the fact he radiated an aura of sensuality that was so strong she doubted any woman would be immune to it. A clear challenge had always been reflected in his glance, the pride of his posture, the insolent curve of h
is taunting smile, but she had been too innocent to understand it for what it truly was. Alex had taught her a great deal about the relationship between a man and woman, but it had been with a loving perspective. What she now recognized in Raven was merely the primitive power of raw desire.
She could not draw a deep breath until Raven dropped his hand, but then his actions became as suggestive as his words as he began to unbutton his shirt. Appalled by the boldness of that gesture, Eden reached out to stop him.
“Raven, this is ridiculous! Last night was a regrettable mistake that mustn’t ever be repeated. Can’t you understand that?”
“No, this is all I understand.” Raven leaned toward her, his mouth opening slightly as his lips drew close to hers.
Paralyzed by the same fascination that exists between helpless prey and a sleek predator, Eden watched Raven’s eyes close, the black fringe of his lashes becoming dark crescents against his bronze skin. Freshly shaven, his cheek felt as smooth as her own when she raised her hand in a feeble effort to turn his face away. Raven caught her wrist, placed a tender kiss on her palm, then pressed her open hand against his chest. His heart was beating with a slow, steady rhythm, in contrast to her own, which seemed to pound louder and louder in her ears until the sound drowned out the voice of her conscience and she heard only the sweet song of desire.
Raven’s lips found hers then, soft, yielding, as tempting as he had remembered while Eden thought only that while he no longer tasted of brandy, his kiss was every bit as intoxicating. Her fears of him instantly forgotten, she made no effort to escape his embrace now, and let her hand slide down his chest, gently combing the crisp black curls that tapered to a thin line at his navel. She could not remember why they had been arguing when all she had to do was close her eyes and Raven was magically transformed into Alex. Dear, dear Alex, whose kisses had always been gentle, and overflowing with love.
It was her passions he had wanted to arouse, but Raven was sufficiently captivated by the sweetness of Eden’s surrender to allow her to set a relaxed pace. With her help, he shrugged off his shirt. Her nightgown then followed it to the floor. Had he known they would be making love again that morning he would not have bothered to dress but he quickly cast the rest of his clothing aside so nothing hindered his appreciation of the velvet softness of her skin. He pulled her close, aligning their bodies so that the fullness of her bosom fit snugly against the hard planes of his chest.
Despite Alex’s encouragement, Raven had never thought he needed a wife, but he now intended to bed Eden as often as it took to convince her they had to wed. He felt the pale flesh of her supple body warm beneath his caress, and knowing she would not try and elude him now, he relaxed his hold on her. The smooth swell of her breast fit perfectly in the gentle curve of his hand and he leaned down to moisten the delectable pink tip with his tongue. He had never wanted to suck at another woman’s bosom like an adoring child, but as Eden enfolded him in her arms, pressing his face close, he found the long forgotten instinct too powerful to suppress. He wanted all of her, in every way a man could take a woman, but when he brought their bodies together, he knew the oldest way would do for now. Eden was a uniquely fascinating female and it pleased him to think he would have a lifetime to enjoy her charms.
Had Raven attempted to force himself on her, Eden would have fought him with her last ounce of strength, but she simply did not have the will to fight his subtle seduction. He was not demanding, nor possessive. He was slow, and so gentle he drew forth emotion in endless waves of delight. Filled with the most exquisite of sensations, she again sought to recapture the love she had thought lost to her forever, and in Raven’s arms it was so easy she had no will to resist. In her mind, it was Alex who again shared her bed and it was his name that echoed in every beat of her heart.
Raven had never been with a woman he had not paid. When he again felt Eden’s climax shudder clear through her, he realized the squeals of ecstasy he had so frequently heard had been no more than the carefully rehearsed response a whore’s profession required. He had mistakenly believed he had known all there was to know about women, but now he realized he had merely been trained to accept an artfully acted lie. Making love with a whore was no more exciting than walking through the steps of a dance without the music, and yet he had believed that was all any man ever felt.
How could I have been such an ignorant fool? he asked himself. It was no wonder he had become bored with women when none had cared for anything but his money and he had cared even less for them. With Eden he felt reborn, and the pleasure he found in her arms was so intense the blissful calm that followed was the most perfect peace he had ever known. He was floating on that dreamlike cloud now, and wanted it to last forever. He shifted his position to spare Eden the burden of his weight, but continued to hold her cradled in his arms. He combed her tawny tresses through his fingers, more content than he had ever been.
“Today, Eden,” he whispered softly.
The sound of Raven’s voice jarred Eden badly. Devastated by how swiftly her memories of Alex had led her astray, she rose up on her elbow and forced herself to look at her dark-eyed companion. When he responded with the rakish grin that had been her undoing the previous night, she was overwhelmed with the worst feelings of shame and remorse she had ever experienced, or had need to. Gathering the sheet to cover herself, she sat up as she began to cry.
“This isn’t your fault. It’s entirely mine, but I can’t marry you. I’m still in love with Alex. His memory is precious to me and deserves the greatest respect.” She fell silent then, unwilling to confess how badly she had used Raven when she knew he would surely be deeply hurt by it, if not so outraged he might promptly strangle her. She had no choice but to let him think she was completely devoid of morals, but it was better than telling him the truth when he would despise her for it.
Dismayed, Raven watched Eden sob as though her heart were broken, but when he tried to pull her back into his arms, she cried even louder and pushed him away. He had had a month to fume over the way she had enticed Alex into marriage. He knew exactly what she was and he was certain that, even though she would undoubtedly also be marrying him for his wealth, he would get his money’s worth. What he could not understand was why she was pretending to be so upset by what had transpired between them when it had felt so good.
“You certainly have convenient limits to the way you plan to respect Alex’s memory,” he chided.
Sickened by the truth of his words, Eden turned aside, buried her face in her pillow, and continued to weep for the husband she had lost and, to her everlasting shame, the desire she could not control.
Having had enough of her tears, Raven rose from the comfortable bed and dressed for the second time that day. He then went to the valise that now lay open at the end of the bed. He sorted through his clothes until he found Alex’s letters. He had brought them intending to wave them dramatically while he told Eden exactly what he thought of her, but they would serve a different purpose just as well. Selecting the second one, he carried it over to the bed.
“Alex wanted us to be together, Eden. Here, read this, you’ll see what I mean.”
Even through her tears, Eden recognized Alex’s handwriting. She reached out and took the letter in a reverent clasp as she again sat up, but she needed a moment to compose herself sufficiently to read it.
Raven moved back to the window. He could make out the masts of the Jamaican Wind in the distance, and as always the sight of the graceful ship filled him with pride. “I’d like to leave for home within a week. There will be too great a risk that we’ll run into hurricanes if we delay any longer.”
“Home to Jamaica, you mean?” Eden was running her fingertips over the neatly penned lines of Alex’s letter, not yet focusing on the words.
“Yes. Alex meant to take you there. You’ll be going with me instead.”
Eden smoothed out the single sheet of stationery, then read the letter twice. She was deeply touched by Alex’s glowing descripti
on of their life together as well as his hopes for her future happiness. As perceptive a person as Raven, Eden also understood the message that was only implied in his words. “Alex was a dear and thoughtful man, and I’m certain he didn’t mean this subtle hint that we might one day marry as an order.”
Twenty-four hours earlier Raven would have agreed, but now it served his purpose to honor Alex’s last request. “I would have liked to have discussed the matter with him, but Alex knew me far better than you do. He knew I would have rebelled at such an order, while his gentlemanly plea is impossible to refuse.”
“I can understand how he would have been concerned about me, but what about you, Raven? You were the one who was supposed to find a wife this summer. Have you been seeing anyone besides Stephanie this last month?”
Raven stifled a derisive snort at the last possible second, and shook his head instead. “I’ve no interest in your cousin, nor any of the other young women I’ve met.”
“Stephanie will be heartbroken to learn that. She’s very fond of you.”
“Stephanie is a” Raven paused as he searched for an appropriately descriptive term that would not also apply to Eden.
Eden recognized his sullen frown as clear evidence of the foulness of his mood. “You needn’t say it. It’s obvious you aren’t as attracted to her as she is to you.”
“I despise the bitch!” Raven took a step toward the bed, tempted to tell Eden what Stephanie thought of her, but decided against it when he saw Eden’s eyes widen with horror.
“I’m nothing like Alex, Eden. You might as well get used to that now. He always displayed the best of manners while I won’t pretend a respect I don’t feel. The only reason I even spoke to Stephanie, let alone spent any time with her, was so that Alex could be with you. I know he hoped that I’d find her attractive but I didn’t. She just never shut up long enough to notice I didn’t hear a word that she said.”