Sin Bin (Denver Rebels Book 3)

by Maureen Smith

  Meadow didn’t care about the catty insults of jealous strangers. What had her completely rattled were the pictures themselves. The last thing she wanted or needed was for her picture to be trending on social media sites. The thought terrified her.

  She must have looked downright panicked because Cassidy and Priya exchanged worried glances.

  “Don’t let the pictures get to you,” Priya tried to console her. “It comes with the territory when you’re dating a famous athlete.”

  “Exactly,” Cassidy said in a gently pragmatic tone. “As long as you and Logan are a couple, nosy people are going to take pictures. He’s gorgeous and rich, and you guys look really happy together. If all you have to worry about is being stalked by paparazzi, I’d say that’s a damn good tradeoff.”

  Meadow frowned as her mind flashed to an image of the old house in Vegas. She remembered the gloom that clung to it. Remembered the lingering sense of menace she’d felt.

  She knew there was only one way to keep herself out of the public eye, to stop the pictures and silence the unrelenting chatter of social media.

  There was only one way to keep the past from catching up to her.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  MEADOW

  After work she drove to the practice arena to see Logan. She’d made an impossible decision about their relationship, driven by a need for self-preservation. She dreaded sharing her decision with him. But it had to be done.

  When she arrived at the arena, there were several cars in the parking lot. She parked near the entrance and took a few moments to pray for strength. Then she headed into the building and made her way to the ice, following the sounds of rock music and raucous male laughter.

  About a dozen players were on the ice practicing before empty stands. The moment Meadow picked out Logan’s jersey number, she felt her stomach tighten with nerves. She took a deep breath and forced herself to walk down to the boards on wobbly legs.

  The players were running through some sort of drill, rapidly zigzagging between the markers as they stickhandled the puck before shooting on goal.

  Meadow watched from behind the Plexiglas, dazzled by their speed and electrifying footwork. Their skills were stunningly impressive.

  She found herself smiling as they finished the drill, their laughter and competitive trash talk echoing across the empty stands.

  Hunter was the first to spot Meadow hovering by the boards. He bumped Logan on the shoulder and pointed to where she stood. Logan looked over, his face splitting into a huge grin. He looked so happy to see her that her heart squeezed with guilt.

  After exchanging a few more words with his teammates, he handed his stick to Hunter and then skated toward Meadow. As always, her traitorous heart tried to batter its way out of her chest to tango with him.

  He slowed as he neared her, studying her face as if he could sense her inner turmoil. It wouldn’t surprise her. He could read her like an open book. Hadn’t she told him as much?

  She smiled and waved. “Hey.”

  “Hey.” His voice was rough from his exertions as he skated up to her and stopped with a rasping swish, sending up a shower of ice flakes.

  He towered over her even more in his skates, testosterone oozing from every pore. Jeez, he was delicious. Even all sweaty.

  He leaned down and brushed his lips over hers, sending a rush of tingles down her spine. “Hola, cariño,” he murmured tenderly, his warm breath mingling with hers. “Cómo estás? Qué tal tu día?”

  He was asking how her day went. “Mi primer día de trabajo fue bien,” she told him. “My first day of work went well.”

  “Muy bien.” His eyes glinted approvingly. “Tu español está mejorando. Your Spanish is getting better.”

  “Gracias.” She couldn’t fight the warm glow spreading through her. “I told you I picked up some Spanish when I worked for DFS.”

  “You speak it beautifully.” Logan smiled and gave her another feather-light kiss before pulling back and peeling off his gloves. “Wow.” He whistled softly, giving her skirt suit and high heels an appreciative perusal. “Damn, mamacita. You look hella good in your professional attire.” He lifted a finger and twirled it, gesturing for her to turn around.

  She snorted. “So you can look at my ass? I don’t think so.”

  He laughed, bit his lip, then shook his head. “Seriously though, Jupe. I’m not sure how I feel about you strutting around the office in these sexy little power suits. Guys are gonna be checking you out so much that I’ll have to come up there and kick their fucking asses.”

  “You’ll do no such thing,” she warned.

  Grinning, he pulled his helmet off and combed his fingers through his sweaty hair. He looked so hot she didn’t know whether to swoon or jump his bones. And then she remembered the painful decision she’d made, and in an instant, her mood darkened again.

  Logan’s teammates started leaving the ice, clapping him on the shoulder and winking at Meadow as they skated past. Hunter, Reid, Viggo and Dubs greeted her with warm smiles and super-friendly hellos.

  She beamed at them. “Hey, fellas. Good workout?”

  “Yes, ma’am.” They grinned and playfully bumped Logan’s shoulder. “We’re out.”

  Logan nodded to them. “See you guys tomorrow.”

  Once everyone left, the cavernous arena felt even more deserted. This was further compounded when someone turned off the music, plunging the place into sudden silence.

  Meadow nervously smoothed back a strand of hair from her sleek topknot. Her heart was pounding so hard she was sure Logan could hear it.

  He put his helmet and gloves down on the ice. Then he plunged his hand into her hair and loosened her topknot, unwinding it until her thick hair landed softly around her shoulders.

  She stared up at him, barely breathing.

  “Much better. Less restrained.” He was smiling, but there was an edge to it. He definitely knew something was up. “You got here sooner than I thought you would. Did you stop home first and pack a bag?”

  She hesitated, then shook her head.

  Disappointment flashed through his eyes. “Don’t tell me you changed your mind about staying over.”

  Her nerves twisted into heavy knots in her belly. “Logan—”

  He took a step toward her. “You don’t have to stay the whole week. I’ll take one night if that’s all I can get.”

  She swallowed back the ache she felt for him. “Remember how I told you that I was still trying to figure things out?”

  She saw a flicker of wariness in his eyes before he gave a short nod.

  She nervously licked her lips. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking since we got back from Vegas. I care about you so much and I thoroughly enjoy being with you. But...”

  His jaw tightened. “But what?”

  She swallowed hard and forced out the rest of the words. “I think we should just be friends.”

  He frowned. “Just friends?”

  She nodded and wrapped her arms around her stomach, staring down at her feet.

  “What the hell does that even mean?”

  “I think it would be best—”

  “Bullshit. You don’t think that at all. You can’t even look me in the fucking eye!”

  She dragged her gaze back up to his angry face. Her heart was doing all sorts of crazy acrobatics in her chest.

  “What’s really going on here?” he growled.

  “I told you.” She reached up and cupped his cold cheek. “We make such good friends, Logan—”

  “We do. But I want more.”

  She shook her head regretfully. “I don’t think I can give you more.”

  “Why the hell not?” His eyes narrowed with suspicion. “Is this about that astronomy professor? Are you dumping me so you can go out with him?”

  She frowned. “This isn’t about—”

  “Don’t think I didn’t see the text he sent you while we were together on Saturday,” Logan snarled. “The only reason I didn’t say an
ything was because I didn’t want to start an argument in front of our friends.”

  Meadow dropped her hand from his cheek. “My decision has absolutely nothing to do with Ephraim. I haven’t even thought about him—”

  “Then why the hell are you doing this?” Logan demanded furiously.

  “I told you I was having reservations!” she burst out. “What’s wrong with just being great friends? You even said yourself that you don’t do relationships!”

  “I don’t. Not with other women. The same rules don’t apply to you, Jupiter. You’re different and you know it.”

  Her breath burned in her throat. “How can I be sure of that?”

  “Because I’m telling you! And I think I’ve done a damn good job of showing you!”

  In her heart she was screaming, You have showed me! Even if I don’t completely believe it yet, I want to be with you more than anything! But I can’t outrun my past while being seen everywhere with you!

  She wished she could be completely honest with him. But she knew he wouldn’t understand.

  He took her chin in his hand. His grip was gentle, but she could feel him trembling with anger. “Tell me what’s going on.”

  She swallowed tightly. “You’re not listening to me.”

  “Because you’re not making any fucking sense.” He released her and skated backward, as if he needed to put some space between them so he could think.

  She sighed in exasperation. “Can you please come back?”

  He shook his head. “You come out here.”

  “Are you crazy? I’m not stepping out on that ice in these heels! I’ll slip and—”

  “I won’t let you fall.” He skated back to her, took her hands in his and carefully led her back onto the ice.

  She glowered up at him. “Why do we have to be out here? We’re in an arena full of empty seats. Can’t we sit down somewhere and finish our conversation like rational adults?”

  “No,” he grumbled darkly. “You’ve thrown me for a fucking loop. I need solid footing.”

  “On ice?”

  “I’m comfortable on ice.”

  “Well, I’m not,” she huffed, tugging her hands from his so he would stop skating. The ice felt slick and perilous beneath her feet. He’d put her at a disadvantage, which had undoubtedly been his intent. Diabolical jerk.

  “Now.” He stood so close that she had to tilt her head back to look up at his scowling face. “Tell me again why you think we should just be friends.”

  She stared into his piercing eyes and almost lost her resolve. Almost. “As much as I enjoyed the time we spent together last week, I think we need to keep things platonic from now on.”

  His lips twisted into a smirk. “What are you saying? What happened in Vegas should stay in Vegas?”

  She flinched at the biting mockery in his voice. “That’s not what I’m saying.”

  “Then what are you saying, dammit?” He pushed his face into hers, his eyes glittering fiercely. “The night of my birthday. What was that about, huh? Was I just a pity fuck?”

  “No!” she cried vehemently, hurt that he could think such a thing. “Pity had nothing to do with what we shared that night! Or the night after that!”

  “I’m not so sure I believe you.” He glared down at her. “First you lied to me about having a boyfriend. Then you tried to foist me off on Ana’s sister. Now you’re dumping me just days after we made love.” He shook his head, his lip curled in a sneer. “I gotta tell you, Jupe. You’re doing wonders for my fucking ego.”

  Frustration welled up inside her. “Look, those nights we spent together were absolutely amazing, okay? I’ll never forget them as long as I live—”

  “Neither will I!” he shouted, his voice thundering around the empty arena.

  Their gazes locked in an emotionally charged standoff.

  “Why won’t you give me a chance, Meadow?” he demanded, urgently imploring her with his eyes. “Why won’t you give me a chance to be your man?”

  “Because!”

  “Because what?”

  “There are pictures of us out there!” she burst out shrilly.

  His eyes flickered and his jaw flexed. “I’m aware of that.”

  “And it doesn’t bother you? Having your privacy violated like that?”

  He shoved his hand through his hair. “What do you want me to say? I’m not crazy about being constantly photographed, but it is what it is!”

  “Not for me!” she asserted, folding her arms tightly across her chest. “You know how I feel about being in the spotlight, Logan. I don’t want complete strangers prying into my personal life. You might be used to that kind of attention and scrutiny, but I’m not. And I don’t think I ever will be!”

  He bracketed her face in his hands, his eyes fiercely probing hers. “What are you so afraid of?”

  Her throat tightened. “Logan—”

  “I won’t let anyone hurt you,” he promised. “I’ll protect you—”

  “Even from yourself?”

  His expression darkened. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

  “Isn’t that what all men say?”

  “I’m not all men. I’m Logan. You know me.”

  She said nothing, staring fixedly at the strong column of his throat.

  Suddenly he stepped back and furiously ripped off his practice jersey, flinging it to the ice before he tore at his padding.

  She stared at him in alarmed disbelief. “What’re you doing? Are you crazy? You’re gonna freeze your ass off!”

  “Yeah?” he taunted, his massive bare chest glistening with sweat. “What do you care?”

  “I care about you, you freaking idiot! Put your damn jersey back on!”

  “Nope. Not until you agree to be my girlfriend.”

  “Seriously, Logan?” she sputtered in exasperation. “You’re being ridiculous!”

  “So are you,” he countered. “You know we’re damn good together. Why fight it?”

  “I told you—” She broke off as he started skating circles around her, a blur of tanned male flesh and tribal tattoos. “What are you doing?”

  “Give me one week to prove to you that we belong together,” he proposed.

  She scowled. “I don’t need—”

  “One week! That’s all I’m asking.”

  She groaned. “This is crazy, Logan! Seriously,” she insisted, turning this way and that as she tried to address him. “You need to cut this out and put your jersey back on before you catch your death of cold!”

  He ignored her exasperated warning, the blades of his skates cutting through the ice as he continued circling her. “I’m not stopping until you say yes.”

  She rubbed her temple with her fingers, gnashing her teeth in frustration. “You need to respect my decision.”

  “Not when I think you’re making a huge mistake.”

  She made a frustrated sound and almost stamped her foot before she remembered that she was standing on a slippery surface.

  “I can do this all night,” Logan taunted.

  She let out an exasperated shriek, glaring at him as he passed in front of her. He was so infuriating she wanted to strangle him. At the same time, she was worried about his safety. He wasn’t wearing his helmet. The last thing she wanted was for him to make himself so dizzy that he’d fall and crack his damn head on the ice.

  She tried one last appeal. “Logan—”

  “All night,” he reminded her. “I’m here for the long haul, if that’s what it takes to make you see reason.”

  She sighed and closed her eyes. Being with him was dangerous on so many levels. But something told her, deep down inside, that he was worth the risk.

  So she capitulated to his demands. “Fine! I’ll go out with you!”

  His skating slowed. “You’ll be my girlfriend?”

  “Yes, Logan! I’ll be your girlfriend!”

  He stopped directly behind her, brushing her hair to one side. His breath was soft on her nape, his body a warm wall at h
er back. Her skin tingled, her breasts swelling inside the lacy confines of her bra.

  “I’ve never needed anyone as much as I need you.” His breath against her ear sent chills down her thighs. “But you know something, baby? I think you need me, too.”

  Her body started to tremble.

  He leaned down and kissed the back of her neck, raising more goose bumps and weakening her knees until she was in danger of falling.

  “I love you,” he whispered fervently against her bare skin. “I’ve loved you ever since I was ten years old. I’ve loved you for so long I can’t remember a time when I didn’t.”

  Her heart soared at his words, tears flooding her eyes. “Logan—”

  “As much as I appreciated Santino’s efforts to provide a nurturing environment for us, life at the group home didn’t become bearable until you showed up with your big beautiful eyes and your telescope, captivating me with all your talk about the constellations. None of that stuff ever seemed real to me until you came along and opened my eyes.” His voice thickened, reflecting the depth of his emotions. “I see the shadows in your eyes, the ones you try to hide. I know you’re just as hurt and broken as I am, and I know it was probably easier for you to forget me because I reminded you of a terrible period in your life. I totally get that. But here’s the thing, angel. I don’t see you as a painful reminder of my past. You were like a ray of sun in a raging storm. A bright spot in a sea of endless darkness. That’s what you’ve always represented to me. Light and hope. So, yeah, I need you desperately in my life, and I’m not above fighting dirty to keep you right by my side.”

  “Oh my God,” Meadow whispered helplessly, closing her eyes as she choked on tears. “Logan…I love you so much. I think I always have. And I could never forget you. It wasn’t even possible.”

  He went very still for a long moment, then she felt his lips curve against her skin. “Jupiter loves me,” he crooned in a triumphant singsong.

  A teary laugh escaped her. “Don’t gloat. It’s unbecoming.”

  He brushed his lips across her nape, an exquisitely tender kiss that wrapped tightly around her heart and left her trembling.

  When she finally opened her eyes and turned around, Logan was whistling with satisfaction as he skated off the ice with his jersey slung over his shoulder and his padding tucked under his arm.