Beautiful Rose

by Missy Johnson

  “What? You’re British. You guys invented bad food,” I retorted with a smirk. “This is gourmet compared to some of the shit that comes out of your country.”

  “Oh, you’re going there, are you? I don’t know Rose, some of the food I’ve seen while here…” he shuddered. I laughed as I took our food from the vendor.

  “Just shut up and eat,” I grumbled playfully, passing him his. We walked over to a small park and sat down at a table. Unwrapping my Taco, my mouth watered at the wonderful aromas. I took a bite and nearly orgasmed on the spot.

  “Oh god,” I mumbled, covering my mouth with my hand. “Soo good.” Jack snorted and shook his head. “What?” I said, between mouthfuls.

  “Should I leave you and your taco alone?” he teased. I glowered at him, then went back to my food. “So, I get the feeling you’re not from around here?”

  “Why do you say that?” I asked, surprised.

  He shrugged. “Just a feeling.”

  “I’m from Manhattan. So I stick out here, do I?”

  I was only half joking. Sticking out in a crowd was the story of my life and one of my biggest anxieties. I liked to be invisible. I liked not being noticed. At least I though that’s what I wanted. Looking at Jack, I could see the benefits of standing out.

  “To me you do, but I know what that’s like, so it’s easy to spot.” Was he talking about being a Brit in the States, or was he referring to something more personal…like family? “Sometimes it’s nice to be noticed. Having someone appreciate you can be an incredible thing.” I looked at him curiously, intrigued by how deep his comment was.

  “How did you end up with a girl like Harmony?” I blurted out. I winced. What a totally awful thing to ask someone, especially considering I knew nothing about their relationship. The thing was, you don’t look at someone the way he’d been looking at me when you’re in a happy relationship.

  “Fair question,” Jack said, amused. “I guess Harmony stops me from seeing what else is out there.” A sadness filled his eyes. “I’ve been hurt in the past, and Harmony is—was—like a buffer. Falling in love can happen so covertly. And by the time you do realize it’s beginning to happen, it’s too late, all you can do is go along with it, the good and the bad.” He made a face. “And that’s my cue to leave,” he joked, “This has been good, Rose. Thanks for inviting me out.”

  “And?” I asked, nodding toward his empty food wrapper. He laughed heartily.

  “Well, I’m by no means an expert, but yes, it was pretty damn good.” Yes! I don’t know why hearing him admit that felt so good, but it did. And I was sure I was grinning like an idiot. He stood up, brushing a few stray crumbs off his clothes. “I better get back to work. I’ll see you tonight.” He winked at me before walking off. I staying sitting as my eyes followed him off into the distance. The familiar wave of anxiety began to work through me as my head began to process what he’d said. I felt so bad for him. I couldn’t even imagine what had led to him being left feeling so broken and alone. I’d want to reach out and hug him and show him he didn’t need to be alone, yet at the same time his actions mirrored my own. How could I be so affected by his words when I ignored the same feelings of abandonment in myself?

  Rose, what the hell are you doing?

  Chapter Twelve

  Jack.

  Working with Rose wasn’t quite as bad as I’d expected. At work she was as professional and focused as anyone else. She worked hard, and fast. And I’d lost count of the number of times my eyes had wandered over to her. A quick glance here. Pretending to write invoices when what I was really doing was checking out her ass.

  I’d been shocked, to say the least, when she’d texted me, but saying no hadn’t been an option. The thought of learning more about her was an opportunity that was too good to pass up. That had been three days ago, and I so badly wanted to ask her out again. But something was stopping me. She was getting to me, and I needed to be careful. Avoiding seeing her out of work was a good start. I’d opened up to her way more than I should’ve—more than I had to anyone else—even Alex.

  That scared the hell out of me.

  After giving the apartment a quick tidy up, I grabbed my keys and my phone and walked downstairs. I needed to get some air. The sun was out, but the cool breeze that was blowing made me wish I’d grabbed a jacket. My phone buzzed in my hand. I checked the ID and saw her name. Rose.

  “Hello?” My heart pounded as I waited to hear her voice float through.

  “Hi. Jack. How are you?” She sounded as nervous as hell, which made me smile. “I was wondering…if you wanted to catch up for a coffee?” her voice squeaked by the end of the sentence.

  “I’ve got a better idea. Text me your address. Can you be ready in ten?” My plan of avoiding contact with her out of work was going really well. That had lasted what, five minutes?

  I pulled up outside a very familiar apartment complex on the north side of town. She was waiting for me, sitting on the bottom step of the stairwell that led inside. Her face lit up when she was me. She stood up, brushed off her ass—which made me laugh—then walked over to my car.

  “Well, this place looks familiar,” I commented as she buckled up her belt.

  “That’s right. Darcy said you used to live here. In my apartment,” she added mischievously.

  My fingers tightened around the steering wheel, the thought of her in my old place making me feel dizzy. Images flashed through my head; her in my shower…did she walk around the place naked? Which bedroom was hers? God, if it was my old room, I’d lose it. I could picture her, lying there naked, touching herself.

  “You right there?” She was smiling at me, her eyes slightly narrowed, like she was trying to figure me out.

  “Yeah. I’m fine. So, how do you feel about the beach?” I asked. Her eyes widened.

  “You’re taking me to the beach?” she repeated. I laughed. She didn’t look impressed.

  “What?” I chuckled. “Where not going in the water. There is the best pizza down near the jetty. My turn to teach you a few things.”

  She blushed as I winked at her. Yep. This girl was cute alright. I pulled out onto the street and turned left. Next to me, Rose hummed softly to the tune on the radio. I pulled up in an angle park opposite the beach. We both got out, and crossed the road.

  We walked down the footpath that stretched along the length of the beach until we came to Giuseppe’s. Rose raised her eyebrows at me as I opened the door for her. “Just go in,” I said, rolling my eyes. She laughed as she entered the restaurant. Well, maybe ‘shack’ would be a more accurate term for this place. A converted beach bar, Giuseppe’s was home to some of the best pizza in the country.

  We sat down and looked over the menu. I ordered a Brooklyn special, which was piled with pretty much everything. Rose ordered a rosemary and potato focaccia.

  “Fancy,” I said, raising my eyebrows. She laughed.

  “I wouldn’t go as far as fancy, but yes. Compared to your pile of…slush I suppose it is fancy,” she replied.

  I snorted. Did she just call my pizza a pile of slush? This, coming from the Taco truck girl.

  “So Jack. Tell me three things your friends don’t know about you?” Her question caught me by surprise. Three things. I thought hard, trying to come up with something witty and original.

  “I have a secret addiction to Project Runway, I’ve been known to live off paper plates so I don’t have to wash-up and one of my new favorite foods is street tacos.” My reply came out immediately. Jack, Jack, Jack. Seriously?

  Rose burst out laughing.

  “Project Runway? Is it a Heidi thing?” she sputtered. She laughed, as her cheeks went pink and her eyes sparkled. Why did I just admit that to her?

  “No. I had nothing to do one day and ended up sitting through an eight hour marathon. It was all over for me from there,” I joked. ‘Now, you’re turn. No holding back either,” I warned her.

  “Right. I’m addicted to ice-cream, I hate shopping and I have
an irrational fear of butterflies.” She nodded her head, as if she were happy with her answers.

  “Butterflies? But that’s like being scared of kittens!”

  “Butterflies are evil little creatures, thank you very much. They stalk you, then wait until you’re vulnerable and then BAM! They attack.” She shook her head sadly. “Don’t look at me like that,” she accused, noting my expression.

  “Like what?” I asked, amused. “Like you’re insane?” Great choice of words there, Jack. I groaned internally. Rose seemed oblivious to my slip up, poked her tongue out at me.

  “Hey, I’m not the closet Project Runway fan,” she retorted. Fair point. I glanced at my phone. Shit! It was nearly three in the afternoon. Time sure flies when you’re having fun. I should have been at the bar, getting ready for tonight, but I couldn’t bring myself to leave her.

  “I guess we better go, hey?” she said, sighing. “I do have a job to get to, you know.”

  I paid, and we walked outside to my car. The drive back to her place was quiet. I pulled up out the front, and waited for her to get out. She flashed me her smile. My heart pounded as I stared at her mouth…those lips. God I wanted to kiss her.

  “See you later,” I said as she let herself out. She leaned against the window.

  “Thanks Jack. I had fun. And your secret? It’s safe with me.” She winked, then walked toward the front entry. I smiled wistfully as I watched her go. Now I felt more confused than ever. Somehow, I didn’t think this ‘friendship’ was going to end well.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Jack

  It was the end of the second week after The Chill Bar's opening, and things were going well. Really well. Nearly every night the place had been booked out and, as of yesterday, we were fully booked for the next six weekends. A few of the entertainment sections in some big name newspapers had given the bar a great rap, which I'm sure was part of its success.

  Not that you would know it, looking around the place now. Wednesday nights were shaping up to be our quiet night, and most of the staff was standing around trying to look busy. I'd already sent two of the part-timers home, and now it was just Darcy, Ash and Rose.

  “Look, there’s no point all three of you guys being here. Two of you can go, if one of you doesn't mind staying back to helping me clean up.”

  “Ash and I will go. Rose can stay,” Darcy piped up.

  Rose and I both turned to her, eyebrows raised.

  “What? She needs the money more than us.” Her eyes twinkled as she spoke. Ash, oblivious to whatever was going on in Darcy's head, shrugged and grabbed his keys.

  “Need a lift?” he asked Darcy. She nodded, and raced over to the bar to grab her purse.

  “See you later,” she called out.

  I turned to Rose and shook my head. “Sorry, I have no idea what that was about.”

  Bullshit Jack. You know exactly what Darcy was trying to do.

  “Me neither.” She smiled awkwardly. We hadn’t really spent any time alone since our trip to the beach. I’d missed her more than I was ready to admit.

  “So. We still have an hour till closing, and the place is empty . . .” I raised my eyebrows suggestively.

  Her jaw dropped, just as I realized how inappropriate that sounded. Bloody great, now she thinks I was propositioning her for sex.

  “God no, I meant music. I thought I could play and you could sing.” I explained.

  I wanted to crawl under the nearest table and die. Why did I always sound like such a dick around her? If there was one thing I did well, it was play it smooth. Not with Rose though. She laughed at my embarrassment.

  “Okay. I'm okay with that,” she said, laughing.

  “Okay.” I grinned. “Good.”

  “Oh hey, I got you something,” she piped up suddenly, reaching for her handbag. I watched as she pulled something out and hid it behind her back. “Hold out your hands.” I did what she asked. In them, she placed a DVD.

  I chuckled when I read the title. ‘Workout with Heidi Klum’ “Nice one,” I said dryly as she giggled. “Just wait until I infest your car with killer butterflies.”

  “God no, please don’t!” she gasped. She was genuinely terrified. I laughed. As if I’d actually do that.

  “Well you better make it up to me,” I said as I walked over to the stage with her following right behind me. We reserved the bands for weekends only, because it just wasn’t worth having them here during the week. Reaching for my guitar, I sat down on the edge of the stage. With my foot, I maneuvered a stool so it sat in front of me. I motioned to it. She smiled and sat down, her hands pressed under her thighs. “What do you want to sing?” I asked. She smiled shyly.

  “Losing You? I mean, it is kind of our song,” she whispered, her lips curving into a smile. I nodded. That sexy little smile had my stomach tingling. Just for now I wanted to give in, and not push these feelings away. For one moment I wanted to fully experience just what falling for Rose felt like. I began to strum my fingers over the strings.

  “You take what you want from me, there’s nothing left to give

  I can’t pretend it’s all okay when I’ve lost the will to live

  Why do I need to feel when all I feel is pain

  Without you by my side things have never been the same

  I keep pushing you away, because with you their comes confusion

  If I try hard enough I can convince myself my love’s just an illusion

  But it’s only you I long for and you’ve left me feeling so low

  Why do good things always have to end, I just can’t let you go…”

  I listened in awe as she sang over the last chord, her sweet, raw voice carrying through the entire bar. Tingles ran up and down my back like they were competing in a cross-country event. I couldn't take my eyes off her. If I’d thought she was beautiful before, the moment those words flowed out of her mouth, I was completely gone. There was no hope for me now.

  Aware of my attention, she smiled and lowered her head. “Are you going to say anything?” she finally chuckled. “You're making me nervous.”

  “Are you serious? You sounded incredible. You gave me goose bumps. Look.” I shot my arm out in front of her, as if to show her the proof. She ran her fingers along the length of it.

  “Definitely goose bumps,” she confirmed softly, her eyes locked to mine.

  I hooked my shoes around either side of her stool and slid her close, so close our bodies were almost touching. My hand found its way to her face, wiping away a strand of hair, and wrapping it behind her ear. As my fingers curved around her neck, I gently tugged her closer to me. My lips met hers as my tongue carefully nudged her lips apart.

  My mouth crashed against hers, my lips desperate for whatever she would give me. I was acutely aware of her hands, which were resting on my thighs. My cock began to throb; having her so close to me was fogging up all my senses. I could feel myself falling into her, losing myself. We continued to kiss, my tongue exploring hers and my need to have her increasing rapidly.

  “Will you play me a song?” she asked suddenly, her lips millimeters from mine. I tilted her head and nestled my face against her neck, my lips exploring…wanting. She brought my face up to hers and crushed her lips on mine. There was something so erotic in the urgency of her actions.

  “As in one of my own?” I mumbled, unable to keep myself from kissing her. She stood up suddenly, kicking the stool out of the way. She moved between my legs, placed my arms around her back and crushed her lips against mine. I pressed my body up roughly against hers, my hands cradling her neck as my mouth ravished hers. God, the sweet taste of her lips was incredible. My erection pressed hard up against her, aching, and begging to be satisfied.

  For weeks I’d been thinking about this, how much I wanted her. So often I’d thought about kissing those sweet little lips, then spreading her legs apart and fucking her. Only I’d fought it, because only one other girl had ever left me feeling this way, and that ended badly.

&nbs
p; I didn’t deserve happiness. The best I could hope for was not to feel, because feeling meant getting hurt again.

  “No,” I growled, pushing her away. “I can’t do this, Rose. I’m sorry.”

  She tugged at the hem of her skirt, disbelief in her eyes.

  “It's not you,” I said quietly. “I promise it’s not you. I'm sorry, I just don't think this is a good idea. I shouldn't have done that.”

  “Jack—”

  “You better go, Rose. It's almost closing time anyway.” She stood there for a moment, her eyes showing the pain and confusion she was feeling. I cursed myself for leaving this amazing girl feeling so rejected. If only she knew just how badly I wanted to be with her.

  Finally, she nodded. Her eyes hardened as they swept over me. I followed her over to the bar and watched her gather her things. With a final glance back at me, she turned around and walked toward the exit.

  This time, she didn't look back.

  I waited a few minutes before locking the front door. Then I walked over to the stairs, flicked off the lights and went up to my apartment, kicking the wall on the way.

  Fuck! Things should never have gotten that far.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Jack

  Tuesday and Thursday nights were proving to be the most popular with the general walk in crowd; the open mic nights. Apparently, hearing the next big thing in music before it became the next big thing was a popular pastime. Even back when I was just working there, the open mic nights were always packed.