by Nora Phoenix
“Yeah. I feel different. Slightly nauseous. Tired. And just off.”
“Okay. There could be several reasons for that, but pregnancy could be one of them. The meds I have you on are ninety-five percent effective, but there’s no data yet on using them with omegas who have the Melloni gene. It could very well be they don’t work—though I’ve used them on Vieno twice before he got pregnant. Would you like to do a pregnancy test first, so we know for sure?”
Sven was ever so grateful Enar went into doctor-mode, sensing Sven didn’t need reassurance or comfort, but facts.
“Yes, please,” Sven whispered.
“Sure. Go into the first exam room while I grab supplies, okay? I’ll be right back.”
Enar was only gone for a few minutes, and Sven tried to keep himself calm. His mind wanted to panic over even the possibility of a pregnancy, but he refused to entertain it. One step at a time.
When Enar came back, he explained how the test worked and Sven went into the adjoining bathroom. He dutifully peed on the stick, stuck it back into the holder-thingy, washed his hands, and walked back out with trembling hands, holding the stick. He handed it to Enar.
“It’s positive,” he said, his voice barely audible. He cleared his throat. “It’s a double line. I’m pregnant.”
Enar studied the stick, then put it down on the desk. “It looks like you are. I’ll draw some blood to double-check, but how are you feeling about this, Sven? Talk to me.”
Sven sat down on the chair next to the desk, his insides strangely calm. “I don’t know. Shocked, I guess. Do…do I have to tell Grayson?”
Enar shook his head. “You don’t have to tell him anything. This is your body, Sven, and it’s your decision. If you want to keep it, alone, with Lars, or in whatever way, we’ll support you in that. If you decide to give it up for adoption, there's a great adoption agency that would be happy to find a good home for your baby.”
“And if I wanted to…terminate the pregnancy?”
“Then that’s your choice and we’ll respect it.”
“Grayson could forbid me,” Sven said. “As the alpha-father, he could—”
“He wouldn’t,” Enar said. “And even if he did, I wouldn’t honor his decision. It’s your call, Sven, and no one else’s. You can talk to as many people as you want or to none at all, and I will do whatever you decide.”
Sven sat on the bed, his arms wrapped around himself, and tried to imagine himself with a baby. It was surprisingly easy but maybe that was because of the hormones? He loved holding Hakon, and Vieno had said more than once Sven had a good instinct with him, but was that enough? Watching Hakon for a few hours wasn’t the same as having a kid of your own.
“What do you think I should do?” he asked Enar. “I’m so young to have a kid, and Lars too, and I don’t know how Grayson would feel about this. He already has kids, so I’m sure he wouldn’t want to start all over again.”
Enar smiled at him. “I can’t make the decision for you, but I can offer you a few things to keep in mind. Medically, having an abortion has risks, and it has a higher risk of complications with future pregnancies. That’s something to keep in mind. If that’s the way you want to go, the earlier you let me do it, the less those risks will be, so you’re a little pressed for time.”
Sven’s head shot up. “You would do it?” he asked, surprised. “I thought they were illegal under these circumstances.”
“They are, but I do them anyway. I hope I can trust you with this information.”
Sven nodded quickly. “Yes, yes, absolutely. I was surprised. I didn’t know.”
“Now you do,” Enar said. “And I trust you’ll keep this to yourself. As for Lars and Grayson, you can’t decide for them how they would feel. You don’t have to consult them as it’s your decision, but don’t make the mistake of assigning them reactions and emotions in your head without testing those. Grayson may surprise you. He loves you and Lars so much. There’s nothing that man wouldn’t do for you.”
He was right. Sven wasn’t sure of many things in his life, but Grayson loved him, and Lars too. That was a fact. The three of them were like a puzzle that fit perfectly, even though they were oddly shaped pieces. But what if he added a baby to that mix? What would that do to their relationship, to their dynamic? Lars still needed Grayson in a big way, and the daddy-care Grayson offered meant so much to him. Would that have to stop?
God, his head hurt already. And Enar was right, Sven couldn’t know for sure how they would react until he told them. But did he want to? They could influence his decision, make him do something he didn’t want.
“Take at least a day to think it over. Whatever you decide will be okay, Sven. Come find me when you’re ready to talk, okay? This is your call.”
10
Ruari received a call two weeks later that his test results had come in, and that Dr. Magnusson asked him to stop by the clinic at his earliest convenience. It was a hassle, making that whole trip again, but he didn’t hesitate, not after the doctor had confirmed it sounded like he had the symptoms of the gene. He needed to know for sure, and if he indeed did have the gene, he needed advice and as much of it as he could get.
So Ruari made the long and complicated trip to the clinic again, happy that Jax was a lot less fussy than last time. When he walked to the clinic’s entrance, he caught himself looking around to see if he spotted Kean. The beta had been such a big help, and he had been so nice about it too. Ruari had been forced to accept a lot of help over the last few months, but sometimes, people made it feel like they were doing you a favor, rubbing it in. Kean hadn’t been like that at all, and Ruari’s heart had melted at the tender way the man had held his son.
But he knew he shouldn’t be on the lookout for Kean. Even if they had shared a connection, and Ruari was willing to admit that they had, he wasn’t in a good place for a relationship right now. Plus, he wasn’t even sure if Kean was single, and if he was, what man would want an omega who already had a child? And not just that, but a child from an alpha whose name he didn’t even know. That was what he kept telling himself as he forced Kean out of his mind.
He didn’t have to wait long for the doctor to see him, and Enar got right to the point. “I'm sorry to inform you that you do have the gene, Ruari,” he said. “I'm sure you must have a lot of questions, and we are here to help you in any way we can.”
Ruari wasn’t as shocked as he had expected himself to be, maybe because over the last few days, he had already come to accept this diagnosis. That didn’t mean he didn’t have questions, however. “Is it hereditary?” he asked. “Or can only omegas get it?”
“We don’t know yet,” Enar answered. “So far, we have tested a few dozen kids of gene carriers, and none of them have tested positive, but there were few omegas among these babies. In fact, we suspect that gene carriers are far more likely to have alpha sons, as the rate of alphas among those babies was statistically significantly higher than among the general population.”
Ruari let out a sigh of relief. At least his baby would be okay. “But you’ll still test him, right?”
Enar nodded. “Absolutely. In fact, we would like your permission to enroll him in a series of tests. Both of you. I have an associate who is doing research into the gene and who could always use more participants.”
“What is the goal of that research, finding a cure?” Ruari asked.
“Ultimately, yes. In the short term, we would be happy to learn more about how the gene works, how it affects the body, and how we can ameliorate its effects. The strong heats are not only a nuisance, as you know better than I do, but have led to dangerous situations and sadly, many cases of sexual assault and rape.”
Ruari swallowed. Even though his first heat hadn’t been a good experience, and his second had not been as satisfactory as he had hoped, at least he hadn’t gone through the horrors Enar was hinting at. Even in his situation, that was something Ruari was grateful for. No matter how much he struggled, things could be a l
ot worse.
“I would love to participate in the research, but if it means coming to the clinic on a regular basis, that might be a problem. I don’t have a car and the public transport here is not a walk in the park, especially with a baby. And I expect it only to become more of a hassle the older Jax gets.”
“I understand, and before we get into that, we have more test results to discuss.”
“The dizziness,” Ruari said.
“Yes. You’re anemic, probably still from giving birth. I can prescribe iron supplements for that. But you’re also malnourished, Ruari. You’re not giving your body the nutrition it needs. Vitamin supplements can help, but I would like to look at your eating habits to combat this in the long term. You need more vitamins, more calcium, and more proteins.”
Ruari shrunk in his seat. How the hell would he be able to afford it? He barely had money left as it was, and he had to prioritize Jax’s formula and diapers. “I’m… Healthy food is so much more expensive,” he whispered.
Enar’s expression showed nothing but understanding. “Bad luck Jax wouldn’t take to breastfeeding, huh? Formula costs an arm and a leg.” He leaned forward, his eyes kind. “You don’t need to tell me anything you don’t want to share, but are you in a position right now where you can take good care of yourself? Because having this gene alone has a lot of implications for the future, especially around your heat, and you’re not in a good physical condition to begin with.”
Ruari leaned back in his chair, rocking Jax, who had fallen asleep against his chest. He had taken him out of the sling as soon as they had arrived, because he’d read that it wasn’t healthy for their bones to be carried in a sling for too long.
How much would he tell the doctor? How much could he tell him? The man had patient confidentiality, but this was a private clinic on private property, and Ruari knew damn well different rules applied here. And if his father ever found out, Ruari had to wonder if the good doctor would be strong enough to resist the pressure his father would put on him to disclose Ruari’s records. And then he would be up shit creek without a paddle.
But what was the alternative? He left home with enough financial reserves to last for a little while, but the bottom of those reserves was in sight. He’d need to start looking for a job soon, which presented so many complications he didn’t even know where to start. Moving to another city was still his best option, one where his father had less of a reach and network, but how would he manage that without a car? And without money, because the little he had left was not enough to finance a move.
Even with the changes in the law the government had made, the system was still stacked against omegas like him. He didn’t have any work experience, and he wasn’t suitable for many jobs because of his status as an omega. Many employers were still hesitant to hire omegas, and there was now the added complication of him having these intense heats, where he apparently attracted every alpha in a five-mile radius. How the hell would he be able to hold a job under those circumstances? And that didn’t even include finding a babysitter for Jax he could trust.
All that time, Enar had patiently waited for Ruari to answer, and he was grateful for that moment to gather his thoughts. He shook his head. “Honestly, I feel like I’m drowning right now. I’m running low on money, and I don’t know what to do. I doubt it will be safe for me to have a job where I’m around people, especially alphas, so I’m lost on how to make this work.”
Kean had been feeding the chickens when his phone had buzzed, and to his surprise, it had been Enar. He wasn’t sure why, but his first thought had been that the call was about Ruari. He hadn’t been able to put the omega out of his mind ever since he met him, thoughts of his sharp blue eyes, and his tight body, and that sweet baby popping up in his head all the time. It was a strange combination, these thoughts, the first two making him rather horny whereas the latter made him dream about being a dad—in itself a new experience.
It had confused him, this strange attraction to someone he’d just met, especially since he was still with Bray. Sort of. They hadn’t spoken since their talk three days before, Kean’s back still painful enough he didn’t want to even consider having sex. Was his attraction to Ruari proof he should forget about Bray, that he’d been wrong about their connection?
Within seconds of taking the call, he was surprised to discover his instincts had been right. Enar was calling him about Ruari, asking Kean to give him a tour of the ranch and explain how they operated.
“He needs a safe place to stay,” Enar explained. “I talked to him about staying here at the ranch, at least until he’s figured some things out. He seemed very interested, but before he can make a final decision, I'd like for him to have a tour and know more about the way we operate. By the time you’re done, it will probably be too late for him to head back using public transport, so can you either give him a ride back to the city or offer that he can spend the night? You may want to put him up with Sando. I think knowing there’s another omega staying here will help Ruari feel safe.”
“You want me to tell him about the pack?” Kean asked, just to be sure how much he was authorized to reveal.
“Yes. We’ve discussed it, the four of us, and we want everyone who considers living on the ranch to be fully informed. There’s a legal aspect, to be sure, but to us it’s more about their well-being. If we advocate the importance of making informed decisions, for instance for omegas when it concerns their bodies, we need to set the right example.”
Kean couldn’t deny that made total sense, even if being so open about the pack scared him a little. He’d learned about the attack on the ranch months ago, and even though they had received no threats since, it was still a concern. Especially now that the rise of the Conservative Wolf Party had agitated the Anti-Wolf Coalition and all its rather short-tempered members, the news of the Hayes pack’s existence falling into the wrong hands could lead to violence. Still, he would follow Enar’s instructions.
“Sure, no problem. Give me a few minutes to finish what I was doing and get cleaned up. I’ve been working all morning, so I’m pretty sure I stink.”
There was no way he was showing Ruari around looking and smelling like this. Granted, it wasn’t as bad as it was on certain days, since he hadn’t done any deliveries or procedures on animals today, but he still was sweaty, looked like he hadn’t showered in a week, and smelled like a farm. Or, a farm animal, more precisely.
Enar chuckled. “Are you sure that’s the only reason you want to get changed?”
Even though Enar couldn’t see him, Kean blushed. Was he that transparent? “Why did you ask me to give him the tour?” he asked instead.
Enar’s voice was soft and kind as he answered. “I thought you two had a connection, and it seems to me Ruari could use a friend.”
He didn’t elaborate, but they both knew how much Kean had overheard while Enar was examining Ruari. Enough to realize Enar was right and that the omega had been through a lot.
“I’ll be there as soon as I can,” Kean promised.
He didn’t care what Enar would say or think, but Kean did take a shower before he headed to the clinic. It was a speed-shower of the two-minute variety, but it was enough to at least smell a little better and not have his hair look like he’d put his fingers in a socket. He threw on a clean pair of shorts and a fresh shirt and rushed over to the clinic, where he found Ruari in the waiting room, Jax strapped to his chest in a sling.
Kean shoved his hands into his pockets, suddenly more self-conscious than he’d been in a long time. “Hi.”
Was it his imagination, or did Ruari look a little flustered as well?
“Hi,” the omega said back.
“Enar said you wanted a tour of the ranch?”
“He suggested you could do it. I hope that’s not too much of an inconvenience for you?” Ruari said.
Kean thought of the long list of tasks on his to-do list and shook his head. “No, not at all.”
They walked outside, where Kean
matched his pace to Ruari’s much shorter legs. He showed him the fields first, as they were closest, then led him toward the area where the animals were.
“This is mainly where I work all day,” he said. “We have a chicken coop that provides us with fresh eggs daily, we have cows for milk and to slaughter for meat—though we outsource that as I don’t slaughter—we have pigs and goats, basically every animal you would expect at a working farm. And we’re looking into buying horses, as well as some tom cats and a few guard dogs. And maybe some other animals, I don’t know yet. The goal is to make the ranch as self-sufficient as possible, especially in terms of food.”
Ruari looked around with more than just a polite expression. “You do all of this by yourself?”
Kean nodded. “For now, yes. But I need to talk to my brother about finding me an assistant. It’s getting a bit much for me to run by myself.”
He couldn’t interpret Ruari's expression, but it looked a lot like he was impressed. They walked closer to the main house, and Kean pointed out all the buildings they had built. “That’s Omega Two, one of our omega buildings. It’s not finished yet, but it should be in a week or two. We have another one that is finished and suitable for omegas to live in, called Omega One. There’s one omega living there right now named Sando.”
“Why are these buildings separated from the main house?” Ruari asked.
Kean shot him a careful look, I’m sure of how much detail he should provide. “For safety reasons,” he said. “Since Enar and Palani are both so closely involved in the research into the gene, they’re expecting gene carriers to live here. That means they would need to stay away from any alphas during their heat, which is why they built these houses so they're disconnected from the main house. Not that all the alphas are in the main house. There are many people living here on pack land, and most of the single men live in dormitory style cottages with four people, spread out all over the pack land. We call them bunkhouses.”