The Moment She Left

by Susan Lewis

  Rowzee nodded distractedly. ‘That’s what he wanted everyone to think, because he felt – and this was Victor for you – that if Sean did turn out to be his son then he needed to protect him.’

  Andee and Graeme exchanged glances. ‘And he did turn out to be Victor’s son?’ Andee prompted.

  Rowzee nodded. ‘We tracked down Norma and she confirmed it. She also agreed to a DNA test. As soon as we had the results Victor got in touch with her again to ask what he could do to help her and Sean, but she said there was nothing, that they were fine and really didn’t need his help. She didn’t sound bitter, he said, just matter of fact. He told her that Sean had asked for money, but she advised him to ignore it. We didn’t hear from her again, but Sean rang a few times. He was always drunk and abusive, I’m afraid.’

  ‘Did he ever try to see Victor again?’ Andee asked.

  ‘No, I don’t think so. I’m sure Victor would have told me if he had. It had a terrible effect on him though. He found it very hard to come to terms with being a dad who had no relationship with his son. If he’d known earlier, while Sean was growing up, there’s no doubt he’d have been there for him. We’d have embraced him into our family, done everything we could for him, but it wasn’t possible by the time Sean was a man. The poor thing was riddled with hatred, all he wanted was money and Victor was afraid to send it because he was sure he’d just spend it on booze or gambling or drugs, whatever he was into.’

  ‘Did he ever threaten Victor again?’

  The frown between Rowzee’s eyes was so deep Andee could almost feel the pain of it. ‘Not that I know of,’ she murmured. ‘If he had I’m sure Victor would have gone to the police.’

  Graeme said to Andee, ‘I don’t think we should bring Jason here.’

  Andee was about to agree when Rowzee interrupted. ‘Jason? Is that Victor’s grandson?’

  Graeme nodded.

  Her eyes drifting slightly, Rowzee said, ‘He’s been on my mind a lot lately – not him, of course, his father, but . . . do you know where his father is?’

  ‘Apparently he’s in Totnes,’ Graeme replied. ‘Jason says he’s not well, which, by the sound of it, is very probably alcohol related.’

  Rowzee nodded and stared down at her hands. After a while, in a shaky voice, she said, ‘I want to see Jason.’

  Glancing at Graeme, Andee said, ‘Why don’t you take some time to think it over?’

  Rowzee’s eyes were bright as she said, ‘Time isn’t . . . I . . .’ She took a breath. ‘I want to see him. You’ll be here, won’t you? So if he does turn out to be like Sean . . . Where is he?’

  ‘I can go and get him,’ Andee offered.

  Rowzee stopped her. ‘Let Graeme go,’ she said. ‘Is that all right?’ she asked her brother.

  ‘Of course,’ he replied. ‘But I think Andee’s right, you should take some time . . .’

  ‘I don’t need it. I promise, I’m fine and if Victor has a grandson I want to meet him.’

  As the door closed behind Graeme Andee was regarding Rowzee closely. ‘I’m not going to ask if you’re OK,’ she said, ‘because I can see that you’re not. So what can I do?’

  Managing to speak past the nausea swirling inside her, while hardly able to see through the swarm of tadpoles in her eyes, Rowzee said, ‘I’m fine. I’d just like to have some time to get used to this, if you don’t mind. If I said that to Graeme he’d worry and refuse to bring the lad.’

  ‘Maybe you’re not up to it today.’

  Rowzee struggled to her feet. ‘I’m sorry to leave you alone. If you . . .’ Words were crowding around her thoughts, trying to turn them into sounds, but she was finding it hard to speak.

  ‘Don’t worry about me,’ Andee interrupted. ‘If you need some time to yourself I’ll pop over and see Charles.’

  ‘Yes, yes,’ Rowzee mumbled. ‘He’ll like that,’ and praying she wouldn’t lose consciousness before she was alone she stood watching, but hardly seeing Andee leave.

  To Andee’s surprise, when she got to the Hall she found the doors and windows firmly closed, in spite of the heat, suggesting that no one was at home. However, Charles’s car was outside.

  ‘He was there a few minutes ago,’ Bill Simmonds told her, as she wandered over to admire his topiary skills. ‘He’ll be on the phone, I expect. Daisy, the housekeeper, should be around if you fancy a cup of tea.’

  ‘I’m fine,’ Andee assured him, turning to look up at the Hall. Spotting Charles at an upstairs window with a phone pressed to one ear she waved out and beckoned for him to come down. He spanned a hand, presumably meaning five minutes, and disappeared.

  Though she was happy to pass the time with Bill, whose humour mixed with his vast knowledge of all things horticultural could be very entertaining, today she was distracted by her concerns for Rowzee. Not only that, she was worried about Alayna and how low she sounded, and in spite of being angry with Martin she was troubled by him too. She wasn’t making a good job of things with her family; even her mother, not usually given to criticism, had said on the phone last night that she seemed to be cutting them all off. This wasn’t true, she simply didn’t know what to do for the best, or at least what could be done to make them feel better – unless she was prepared to sacrifice herself again and give them what they wanted.

  There was so much going round in her head, not to mention tearing at her conscience and confusing her heart, that she might have missed Charles hastening to his car if Bill hadn’t tipped her off.

  ‘Charles, wait!’ she cried, running up to the drive. ‘I need to speak to you.’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ he replied, lowering the driver’s window to speak as she reached him. ‘I’m in a tearing hurry. Can it wait?’

  ‘I guess so. I just wondered if your friend had decided to . . .’

  ‘Forget about him,’ he interrupted. ‘He needs to sort out his own issues. I’ll give you a call . . .’

  ‘OK, just tell me, is Gina still in Dartmouth? I’m heading down that way sometime in the next couple of days, so I thought I might drop in to see her.’

  ‘Yes, she’s there, as far as I know, and I’m sure she’d love to see you. Call first to make sure she’s at home. Sorry, I really have to go . . . Oh, Bill, you’re hedging and ditching too close to the Valley Woods. I was over there yesterday. We need to keep the terrain as impenetrable as possible or the next thing we know we’ll have poachers or hikers trying to break their way through.’

  ‘Aye aye,’ Bill responded, with a salute. ‘Wouldn’t find nothing, even if they could,’ he added under his breath. ‘They don’t go anywhere and there’s nothing in there anyway.’

  As they stood watching Charles’s car speeding down the drive, Andee said, ‘If I didn’t know better I might think he was trying to avoid me.’

  ‘If I didn’t know better,’ Bill grunted, ‘I’d think he was trying to avoid us all.’

  Andee turned to look at him.

  ‘He’s not himself,’ Bill commented, and planting his panama back on his thick mop of silvery hair he left Andee to answer her phone.

  ‘I’m at the Hall,’ she told Graeme, starting back towards Rowzee’s. ‘Have you got Jason?’

  ‘Yes, he’s with me. We should be there in ten. Was she OK when you left her?’

  ‘I’m not sure. You could see it was hard for her, talking about that time. Am I on speakerphone?’

  ‘You are, and if you’re wondering whether Jason knows what his dad did to Victor, he does.’

  ‘OK.’ Was that a good thing, or a bad thing? Probably good, since no one would have to tell him. ‘I’ll see you soon,’ and clicking over to the next call, she said to Blake, ‘You got my message?’

  ‘Just. You’ve had some news from the Met?’

  ‘Yes and no. They haven’t given me what I asked for, but my contact in Kesterly is saying that more enquiries are happening as a result of my request.’

  ‘You never told me what the request was,’ he reminded her.

  �
��I wanted to know if all the letting agents in the area had been contacted. Certainly the estate agents were, but there are some companies that specialise in rentals, and I couldn’t find anything in the files about them.’

  Sounding aghast, he said, ‘So they’re only contacting them now?’

  ‘Possibly. I don’t know anything for certain yet, but I’ll let you know when I do.’

  Not until she was arriving back at Rowzee’s did she realise she’d forgotten to ask Blake if Matt had played at the Mermaid last night. She hoped he had, for it would be encouraging to hear that he was finding heart again, starting to move forward.

  If anyone knew how difficult that was, it was her.

  Chapter Eleven

  Rowzee’s hands were clasped to her cheeks, trembling slightly, as she watched Jason Griffiths getting out of Graeme’s car. The awkward young man wasn’t how she’d imagined Edward would be by this age, mainly because she’d never envisaged her son with tattoos and piercings, or such a nervous expression. He’d have had Victor’s red hair though, and the same summer-sky blue eyes so like Victor’s that she couldn’t doubt for a second that this lanky youth with his pallid complexion and tender shyness had Victor’s blood running through his veins.

  Clearly embarrassed, Jason glanced uncertainly at Graeme, waiting to be told what to do.

  ‘She won’t bite,’ Graeme promised.

  Unable to stop herself, Rowzee reached out to the boy and pulled him into a grandmotherly embrace. ‘Thank you for coming to find me,’ she whispered emotionally. ‘You mustn’t be nervous. I’m very happy to see you.’

  ‘Thanks,’ he managed to grunt. ‘I wasn’t sure . . . I mean . . .’ He kept his head down as he stepped back. ‘I thought you might not, you know . . .’

  Taking his hand, she said, ‘Let’s go inside. I’m sure you’d like a cold drink, and I’ve got some delicious biscuits that Graeme brought with him this morning. Oh goodness, look at me,’ she laughed as she stumbled against the wall.

  Jason was quick to catch her and held on until she was steady again.

  ‘It’s all the excitement,’ she confessed, and because he was so obviously Victor’s she went on smiling at him.

  ‘Kitchen,’ Graeme reminded her.

  Obediently she continued on down the hall, still holding her step-grandson’s hand.

  ‘Is Andee here yet?’ Graeme asked.

  ‘Is she coming?’ Rowzee replied. ‘How lovely,’ and turning back to Jason she watched him looking around the kitchen and sitting room, taking in the paintings and books, old stone fireplace and glossy black Aga.

  ‘This is where your grandfather lived,’ she told him. ‘I can show you his study if you like, and his books. Have you ever read any of the ones he wrote?’

  Jason nodded. ‘All of them. I read them to my dad sometimes.’

  Rowzee wasn’t quite sure what to say to that.

  ‘Ah, here she is,’ Graeme declared, as Andee came in through the back door. ‘Andee, this is Jason Griffiths, Victor’s grandson. Jason, this is a good friend of the family, Andee Lawrence.’

  ‘How lovely to see you,’ Rowzee smiled, clasping Andee’s hands in both of hers as Andee turned from Jason. How fond she was of this woman who felt like a dear old friend, even though she wasn’t. ‘Do you have any news for Blake?’ she asked.

  With a swift glance at Graeme, Andee said, ‘Not for the moment. How are you feeling now?’

  ‘Oh, I’m fine, never better,’ Rowzee assured her, picking up on the glance and realising that she must have lost part of the plot. Never mind, she wouldn’t worry about it now.

  After making sure everyone had lemonade, or in his own case a beer, Graeme said to Jason, ‘Perhaps you can tell us what prompted you to come and find Rowzee now?’

  Rowzee watched the lad’s pale cheeks flush crimson as he turned towards his step-grandmother. ‘I’ve wanted to come for ages, but I kept thinking you wouldn’t want to have anything to do with me. Anyway, I didn’t know where you lived. I knew you taught at the school, but by the time I got up the courage to come you’d broken up for the summer. Then my nan told me she was sure your brother had an antique shop in the old town.’

  Rowzee said, ‘So your nan knows you’re here?’

  He nodded. ‘She’d have come with me if she could, but she can’t leave Dad, so I had to come on my own.’

  Puzzled, Rowzee said, ‘Why can’t she leave your dad?’

  He shrugged. ‘He’s not all that well, so she takes care of him. Anyway, it was cheaper for me to come on my own. Only one rail ticket and I had somewhere to stay with my mate Ryan. I have to get back tonight though, they’re expecting me at work tomorrow.’

  Rowzee looked at Graeme as he said, ‘When we talked you told me you wanted to speak to my sister and only her, so would you like Andee and me to leave you alone for a while?’

  ‘It’s OK, I don’t mind saying it in front of you. I mean, I get that you probably don’t feel right about leaving her on her own with me after everything that happened before, but I promise she’s safe. I wouldn’t never harm her, or anyone. I’m not like that. I know I might look like a bit of a ruffian, that’s what my nan always says, but it’s my way of trying to stop people having a go about the colour of my hair and everything. They still do it, but not as much.’

  ‘You have beautiful hair,’ Rowzee assured him. ‘Just like your grandpa’s. Well, he had more of it, but I’m sure you would if you let it grow.’

  Seeming to like the advice, Jason began, ‘The reason I wanted to talk to you . . .’ He was blushing again, so hotly that it was all Rowzee could do to stop herself taking his hand. ‘Well,’ he stumbled on, ‘it’s to tell you how sorry I am, my nan is too, for what my dad did all those years ago. I only found out about a year ago, when my nan started telling me things she thought I should know. It was terrible, the way my dad beat up his own dad. He should never have done that. He probably wouldn’t have if he hadn’t been drunk. He was always drunk back then.’

  He looked so dismal and saddened by this memory that Rowzee couldn’t help patting his hand in an effort to comfort him. ‘So he doesn’t drink any more?’ she asked hopefully.

  He shook his head. ‘Not the hard stuff, anyway. Sometimes he has a beer, you know, on special occasions and that. My nan blames herself for the way he is, but it’s not her fault. She didn’t make him go on the booze, any more than she pushed him under the car that nearly killed him.’

  Rowzee felt a tremor of shock, and wished she’d started her medication days ago, as she tried blinking away the tadpoles. ‘I didn’t know about that,’ she said softly.

  Jason shrugged, as if to say why would you? ‘The driver never stopped,’ he went on, ‘but he owed some people, big time, so it’s pretty certain that’s who did it. We realised that when someone came to my nan for money after, and the only way she could raise it was to sell her shop. She still works there, and has a share in it, but it’s not completely hers any more.’

  Rowzee said, ‘Is this why your dad’s unwell? He’s never properly recovered from the accident?’

  Jason nodded. ‘He can’t walk, or anything. He doesn’t even talk.’

  Overcome with pity, Rowzee turned to Graeme. ‘We have to help them,’ she told him earnestly.

  ‘No, it’s all right,’ Jason insisted before Graeme could respond. ‘It’s not why I came, I promise. We’re doing OK. It’s just that my nan thinks it might help our karma if we said sorry to you. She believes in all that.’

  ‘And who can say she’s wrong to,’ Rowzee responded warmly. ‘Please tell her that I accept your apology and that I’m very glad you came to find me. Do you think there’s a chance she’ll see me if I go to Totnes?’

  ‘Rowzee,’ Graeme warned.

  Ignoring him, Rowzee kept her eyes on Jason.

  ‘I expect she would,’ he replied. ‘She works on Mondays and Thursdays, but any other day should be all right.’

  ‘That’s fine,’ Rowzee assured him
. How soon would her medication kick in? She daren’t drive until it did. ‘How about this Friday?’ she heard herself saying. ‘I could get the train, the same as you.’

  ‘Or I could take you,’ Andee suggested.

  Rowzee turned to her in surprise.

  ‘I’m going that way to see Jenny Leonard,’ Andee explained. ‘She’s with her parents in Dittisham, which isn’t so far from Totnes. So if Friday works for Jenny and Jason’s nan, it’ll work for me too.’

  ‘Thanks for offering to take her,’ Graeme said as he walked Andee out to her car, leaving Rowzee showing Jason photographs of his grandpa. ‘I’d change things around and go myself . . .’

  ‘You don’t have to,’ Andee came in gently. ‘I’m more than happy to be her chaperone.’

  Humour sparked in his eyes but was quickly gone. ‘I’m worried about her,’ he confessed.

  Understanding that he wasn’t just referring to the sudden appearance of a step-grandson, Andee waited for him to continue.

  ‘You won’t have missed what happened in there,’ he said, his expression stiff with concern. ‘She seemed to have forgotten that she’d already seen you today, and yet she hadn’t forgotten that I was bringing Jason. That seems strange to me, remembering one thing and not the other. And the way she keeps blinking . . . I hadn’t really noticed it before today. Did you notice it?’

  Andee nodded.

  ‘Pamela thinks she should see a doctor, and I’m inclined to agree.’

  Carefully, Andee said, ‘Has Pamela suggested it to Rowzee?’

  ‘Yes, and Rowzee says she will, but I don’t think it’s happened yet.’ He glanced back inside as he said, ‘I’ve always worried about her. So has Pamela, mainly because she always seems to need protecting, though I’d never tell her that. She wouldn’t like it one bit, she likes to consider herself completely capable and fiercely independent, which she is, of course, but there’s no getting away from the fact that she’s very trusting, and that’s not always a good thing. Victor was the same. A sweeter, more generous and loving couple you’d never find anywhere, but being that way hasn’t always served them well. A good example of that is Victor getting into his car to go and see a complete stranger who calls him up out of the blue claiming to be his son. If he hadn’t been so trusting he wouldn’t have ended up being beaten half to death.’ He shook his head as though still trying to absorb it. ‘You have to wonder what was going through their minds back then – and since. I mean, imagine not telling anyone the truth, or feeling ashamed of it, as if that dreadful attack were in some way Victor’s fault.’