Six Cats a Slayin'

by Miranda James

  We both watched the conversation between Jared and our hostess. We couldn’t hear it with so much chatter around us, but it seemed to me that Gerry stood much closer to Jared than was necessary.

  Melba evidently agreed with me. I heard the thinly repressed anger in her voice when she said, “She’d better back off, or I’m about to go over there and remove every single one of those dyed red hairs on her head and laugh the whole time I’m doing it.”

  FOURTEEN

  “You don’t really want to cause a scene, do you?” I asked, made more than a little uneasy by Melba’s tone.

  “I wouldn’t give her the satisfaction,” Melba said. “She knows I’m watching her, and she’s doing it deliberately. Trying to goad me into embarrassing myself, but I’m not going to let her.”

  Relieved, I said, “Good for you. What are you going to do?” Because I knew Melba well enough to realize that she would retaliate somehow.

  She looked at me and smiled. “I’m going to chat with her guests, and I’m going to find out if anybody here knows anything about her. Who she really is, where she came from, and what she’s up to. She’s no Albritton, that’s one thing for sure.”

  This was the first time today that I had seen Melba, and I realized that I still hadn’t told her about overhearing a shouting match between Gerry and Billy Albritton on Sunday.

  “I’ve been meaning to tell you something,” I said in an undertone. “You may have to change your mind about her being an Albritton. On Saturday your friend Billy came to see her, and they ended up having a really loud argument.”

  “And you’re only just now telling me about this?” Melba frowned at me.

  “You weren’t at work yesterday,” I reminded her, “and I wasn’t there today. I figured I’d wait until I saw you at work tomorrow. I didn’t think it qualified as news that had to be shared immediately.”

  “Tell me about it now, then,” Melba said.

  I shared with her what I knew about the quarrel, and that wasn’t much, only that they were shouting at each other loud enough that I heard the noise from inside my house.

  “But you couldn’t hear what they were saying?” Melba asked.

  “No, I couldn’t,” I replied. “I thought the fact that they were arguing would be of sufficient interest to you. If they were complete strangers to each other, I can’t imagine they would carry on like that where the neighbors could hear.”

  Melba looked thoughtful. “I wonder if Jared heard them. I’ll have to ask him, but not right out. I don’t want him to think I’m nosy.”

  “He’ll find that out soon enough,” I said.

  Melba ignored my little dig. “Time to break this up.”

  I watched her move in on Jared and Gerry. The latter quickly found herself detached from Jared, and Melba bore him off to another part of the room, where they started chatting with another couple. I didn’t know the people, but I supposed either Melba or Jared did.

  I looked around for Helen Louise. I had had enough of the crowd now and was ready to go home. If Helen Louise was intent on staying, though, I wouldn’t make an issue of it. She worked hard and deserved the chance to enjoy herself at a party, if that’s what she wanted. I didn’t see her in this room. With her height, she was generally easy to spot.

  The hall held a crush of people, and I worked my way through it to the dining room. I went around one side, trying to maneuver where the path seemed a bit more open. When I reached the wall, I turned to survey the room. I spotted Helen Louise moving toward the door. Slightly aggravated, I retraced my steps, but by the time I reached the door, I couldn’t see Helen Louise.

  I chanced to glance down the hall toward the room where she had left her coat. There she was, making her way toward the back of the house. I set off once more in pursuit, muttering “excuse me” repeatedly as I squeezed between and around couples and groups.

  I caught up with her at the door of the den and started to speak, but she held up a hand to silence me. Then she nodded toward the partially open door. I thought I heard voices coming from inside the room. I moved closer to her, and together we peered into the room.

  A heated exchange was in progress, between Gerry and Deirdre Thompson. The issue seemed to be the flyer that Gerry or her minion had left at Deirdre’s house.

  “. . . ask you not to bother sticking such things on my door,” Deirdre said, each word enunciated and dripping with disdain. “I don’t like trash left at my house. Why you ever thought I would be interested in selling a home that’s been in the family for four generations, I’ll never understand.”

  Gerry shrugged. “Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Isn’t that the way the saying goes? Besides, if I remember correctly, the house is only about seventy-five years old, if that much—your father bought it, so don’t give me that four-generation crap. Looks it, too, from what I can see on the outside. That’s why I thought you might be interested in selling it. If you’re going to keep it, you ought to do something to improve it.”

  Helen Louise leaned close to whisper in my ear. “She’s not kidding. Deirdre is so tight with her money, she hardly ever spends it. Just look at that dress. Must have belonged to her grandmother.” Now that she mentioned it, I thought Deirdre’s dress did seem old-fashioned. I remembered seeing my grandmother in a similar style. I even think we buried her in a dress like it. I hadn’t known that Deirdre had a reputation as a skinflint. Rumor had it that she was rich enough to buy Memphis two times over and have change left.

  Gerry was still talking. “. . . going to fall in if you’re not careful.” She laughed. “You’ll end up buried in the rubble when the whole thing crashes down around you. Let go of a few bucks, why don’t you? I’m sure your father left you a lot of them as his heiress, right?”

  Deirdre’s hands clenched and unclenched repeatedly. I thought she might be struggling not to slap Gerry or punch her right in the face. Gerry didn’t appear to be concerned about any potential attack from Deirdre. After all, women like Deirdre were reared to remember the first tenet of Southern genteel womanhood: Thou shalt at all times behave like a lady.

  That probably explained why Deirdre hadn’t fired back a response yet. These old codes of behavior are difficult to break sometimes, and I watched with great curiosity to see if Deirdre reached the snapping point.

  All at once Deirdre’s hands relaxed, and she smiled. “You are probably the most remarkably ill-bred person I have ever encountered. You’ve made the entire neighborhood a laughingstock with that completely tasteless display in front of this house. By putting that up for all and sundry to gape at, you’ve shown us all just how little class you have always had. Then you go and serve expensive champagne to your guests and pair it with the cheapest food you could find that’s halfway edible. I decided to come here tonight on the vague chance that you were someone worth acknowledging. I was wrong to do so, because you’re obviously not.”

  Deirdre shot Gerry a look of haughty triumph and began to walk away. Gerry stared at Deirdre’s retreating back, and if Deirdre had burst into flame from Gerry’s gaze, I don’t think I would have been surprised.

  “Not so fast, Deirdre dear,” Gerry said, more coolly than I would have thought possible. “You don’t want to make an enemy of me, I promise you. I know a lot about you, don’t forget that. Some people think they’re so much better than anyone else when they really aren’t. Think about how your society friends would react if they knew some of the things I do. Wouldn’t do to let some of those things get around, now would it?”

  Deirdre whirled around, her face white. “Don’t try to threaten me. My society friends wouldn’t listen to a word you say about me. I couldn’t care less what you’ve heard from the type of people you probably know intimately.” Her lip curled. “Too intimately, I imagine.”

  Gerry’s expression hardened. “Why don’t we test my little theory, Deirdre? Introduce me to some of your s
ociety friends. If you play nice with me, maybe I won’t destroy your reputation after all.”

  “You can go to hell.”

  With that, she turned and came toward the door.

  Helen Louise and I were frozen to the spot for a moment, but before we could decide what to do, Gerry’s mocking laughter halted Deirdre in her progress.

  “If you know what’s good for you, Deirdre darling, you won’t leave the room until I’ve finished what I have to say to you.” After a brief pause, during which Deirdre didn’t move, Gerry continued. “I have a proposition for you, and it’s to both our advantage, so listen up.”

  Helen Louise and I exchanged glances. I knew we were both thinking that we should have walked away before now. This was none of our business. Accordingly, we both stepped back from the door and turned toward the front of the house. I could see Stewart still making his way through the crowd in the hallway, evidently intent on reaching us. We moved forward to meet him.

  “Finally,” he said, when he stood only a couple of feet from us. “I’ve been looking for you two and for our hostess for the past five minutes or so.”

  “Is there a problem?” I asked.

  “No,” Stewart said. “Haskell has to be up early in the morning, and we’re going home. Thought you should know, and of course, I wanted to thank Gerry for inviting us.”

  Helen Louise responded hurriedly. “I think Gerry’s pretty busy at the moment with another guest. We’re not ready to leave yet, and we’ll be happy to express your thanks to her. You can always write her a note later.” She smiled.

  Stewart’s gaze narrowed as he regarded us. “Okay, you two, what’s going on? You can’t fool me. What have you heard?”

  “Nothing to worry about,” I said in a firm tone. “Y’all go on home. We won’t be far behind you.”

  A voice from behind us gave me a start. “Would you mind moving out of the way? You’re blocking the hall.”

  “Sorry,” I said, and moved aside.

  Deirdre Thompson brushed past me, her face set in angry lines. She continued to push her way through the hall.

  Stewart stared after her briefly, then turned back to Helen Louise and me. “Whatever it was must have involved Deirdre. Who was she talking to that you overheard?” Then he appeared startled. In a low voice he said, “Never mind. Here comes Gerry.”

  I turned, as did Helen Louise. Gerry came up to us, her hostess’s smile in place. “I hope you’re enjoying yourselves this evening. Be sure to have more champagne. There’s plenty of it.” She nodded and walked on past us.

  “She looks pretty satisfied with herself,” Helen Louise said. “You wait here. I’m going to the restroom.” She headed back toward the den and the bathroom connected to it.

  “Why does Gerry look satisfied with herself?” Stewart demanded. “Were she and Deirdre having an argument?”

  I knew Stewart would continue to pester me, so I might as well go ahead and tell him now. I gave him a short summary of what Helen Louise and I had witnessed. Feeling guilty at my behavior, I concluded by saying, “We should have walked away immediately, of course. It was a breach of good manners to stand there and watch, but the temptation was too great to resist, I guess.”

  “Yes, it was.” Stewart winked at me. “But life would be pretty dull if no one ever eavesdropped. I wonder what on earth Gerry knows about Deirdre that’s blackmail-worthy. Fascinating idea.”

  Over Stewart’s shoulder I saw Haskell coming our way. Not far beyond him, headed toward the front door, was a man who looked like Billy Albritton from the brief glimpse I had. He disappeared through the door, and then I wasn’t sure I had seen the councilman after all. Probably someone who looked a little like him.

  Haskell tapped Stewart on the shoulder. “Where have you been? I’ve been waiting at the door, and I saw Gerry go by, into the dining room. Did you speak to her?”

  “No, I didn’t,” Stewart replied. “It doesn’t matter. Charlie and Helen Louise will express our thanks. Let’s go home. See you in the morning,” he said to me.

  They disappeared into the crowd, and I turned to watch for Helen Louise. At least two more minutes passed before she returned. She had not brought her coat, and I interpreted that correctly to mean that she wasn’t ready to leave the party. I suppressed a sigh and followed her back to join the festivities. I gave a fleeting thought to taking refuge in the den, but Helen Louise wouldn’t let me get away with that.

  Helen Louise accepted another glass of champagne, but I refused. I asked the waiter instead if there was bottled water available, and he assured me there was. He promised to return soon with one for me. While I waited, I stood next to Helen Louise and listened with half an ear to her conversation with a woman I vaguely recognized as a resident of my street. I gathered that she and Helen Louise had worked on a church committee together last year, and they were discussing the results of their efforts.

  The waiter returned promptly with my water, and while I sipped at it, grateful that it was cold, I surveyed the room. I spotted Deirdre Thompson once again talking to Betty and Chip Camden. Deirdre evinced no signs now of her acrimonious argument with Gerry earlier. I wondered idly what it was that Gerry had demanded of her.

  Melba and her escort, Jared, stood a few feet away from me. Upon seeing me, Melba waved me over. I glanced at Helen Louise, but she was too involved in her conversation with her church friend for me to interrupt. I joined Melba and Jared.

  “Looks like a successful party to me,” Melba said. “Lot of people here, so that must make Gerry happy. How nice for her.” She smiled at Jared, who smiled benignly back.

  It took me a moment, but I got it. Melba wasn’t about to let Jared know how she really felt about our hostess. I had to suppress a chuckle. Jared probably had no idea that the women loathed each other, and I didn’t plan to be the man who enlightened him.

  “Yes, it is nice, isn’t it?” I said. “Jared, what do you think?”

  “Nice,” he said. “Definitely.”

  A loud crash sounded somewhere behind me. Women screamed. I turned around, seeking the source of the noise, but I couldn’t see anything at first. There were too many people in the way. So I moved forward, and someone stepped aside.

  Then I caught a glimpse of Gerry Albritton on the floor, surrounded by serving dishes and food scattered about.

  Our hostess lay prone on the floor. She wasn’t moving.

  FIFTEEN

  Had she suffered a heart attack or a stroke? Or had she simply fainted? Like everyone else, I stood where I was, not moving, stunned by what I was seeing, focused on Gerry lying on the floor.

  I glanced up and saw Helen Louise standing a couple of feet to the left of where Gerry had fallen. There were two women close to her, Deirdre Thompson and Betty Camden. Melba and Jared Carter stood not far away from me, but they were facing the other direction.

  Suddenly Helen Louise was on her knees beside Gerry, and I pushed through the people in front of me to help her. Helen Louise was trained in CPR.

  “Someone call an ambulance,” I said harshly. I knelt and helped Helen Louise turn Gerry on her back. Helen Louise quickly positioned Gerry’s head and began blowing air into her mouth. In my days as a library manager I had learned CPR, too, though it had been quite a few years since I had had to make use of my skills. I helped with the chest compressions.

  Helen Louise and I worked on Gerry until an ambulance crew arrived to take over. I helped Helen Louise to her feet, and we moved out of the way.

  “It’s no use,” Helen Louise said softly. “She’s gone.”

  Her dress now splotched from the food scattered on the floor when Gerry fell, Helen Louise looked tired and shaken. I glanced down and saw that my knees and lower trouser legs were stained as well.

  I slipped my arm around Helen Louise’s waist, and we watched as the EMTs worked on Gerry a few minutes more. Then
one of them called a halt, and they stood back.

  Police arrived on the scene and began clearing the room. They moved us into the dining room, and I could tell that many people had left. Only the curious had remained, it seemed. Deirdre Thompson was not one of them, I noticed. I didn’t see Betty Camden, either, although Chip was still there.

  Melba and Jared came over to us. “Your beautiful dress,” Melba said in tones of sorrow.

  Helen Louise looked down. I don’t think she had noticed until now. “Couldn’t be helped,” she said.

  “You were terrific,” I said. “You did everything you could.”

  She smiled faintly. “So did you. Thanks for helping.”

  “What do you think happened?” Melba asked. “Looked like maybe she had a heart attack. I didn’t actually see her fall, though.”

  “I don’t know,” Helen Louise said wearily. “She had walked by me moments before, and then I guess she stumbled and fell. I was talking to someone and didn’t pay much attention until I heard the crash. I looked down, and there she was on the floor.”

  “You two were nearby,” I said to Melba and Jared. “Did you see anything?”

  Jared shook his head. “No, I don’t think so.”

  Melba frowned. “I saw her go by us. I think she had come from the hall, or at least, she seemed to be moving from that direction.”

  A low buzz of conversation filled the room as those remaining no doubt discussed Gerry’s sudden and tragic collapse. I wasn’t sure whether everyone realized yet that she was dead, though I doubted it would take long for word to spread.

  “How long should we stay?” Jared asked. “I don’t really see what the point is for all of us standing around here. There’s nothing we can do for her now.”

  “The police will want to question anyone who saw her fall,” I said. “In cases of sudden death like this, they usually do, even if it’s from natural causes.”