Love in Purgatory (De La Fuente #2)

by Lexi Buchanan

  Emelia stepped into her brother again, and kissed his cheek. “I’m not going to bug you, as I’ve just got you to stop bugging me, but you can talk to me anytime, Diego.” She smiled.

  “I know.”

  She backed off and watched as he walked toward his room. He called over his shoulder, “I’m getting changed. Do you want to chill and watch a movie with pizza?”

  “I’d prefer Mexican, but I’ve just told you that I’m meeting Mike.”

  “If that changes, let me know. I’m all yours.” He grinned.

  Once he disappeared into his room, she leaned against the island in the center of his kitchen, and rested her chin on her hands.

  As she looked around Diego’s apartment, she loved the wall that she faced, which had framed pictures of everyone in their family, but it was the one of Dante from when he was ordained that always drew her gaze the longest.

  He’d always made her heart flutter, and she doubted it would ever settle when in his presence, or when she thought about him.

  She’d finally decided that enough was enough and she would travel home over the weekend to talk to her mom. She hoped that Eric could also make it because she really didn’t want to face everything alone.

  Eric was the second eldest and she’d always looked up to him, so she knew that she’d do whatever he advised once she’d had the dreaded conversation with her mother and father. Emiliano would always be a father to her, regardless of her feelings for Dante. He’d always been there for her and Diego, and she knew that he always would be.

  Not a day had gone by that she’d felt treated differently since she’d overheard them, nine years ago now. They were still her family, and she only hoped that by doing what she was about to do, she would help Dante come to terms with the love he had for her.

  She just wasn’t sure that he’d be willing to leave the church for her, or what the rest of their family would think if he did and their feelings were made public.

  Chapter Thirteen

  That morning made three times since he’d woken up while in the middle of an orgasm with the thoughts of Emelia still fresh in his head—thoughts of her mouth on his flesh while she sucked his release from his body. Each time he woke up with the disappointment that she wasn’t really with him. It made him feel an overwhelming sadness.

  Then the guilt would follow.

  He was a priest and, until the first time, he’d not released his seed in over six years. It was no wonder that once he’d started he couldn’t stop.

  But why would it start now?

  Over the years, he’d had strong control over his body so he couldn’t understand why he’d suddenly started waking up in the thrall of an orgasm. It was as though something had happened over the few days they’d spent in Lexington...but that wasn’t right.

  Or was it? You were drunk…

  He froze when the thought hit him. Was it Eric who took him back to the hotel, or was in Emelia? They’d looked at each other before Eric had answered him when he’d thanked him over breakfast the following day.

  “Father, what’s wrong?” Barbara asked, breaking into his musing.

  “I’m fine.” He was distracted, but managed a smile for her before he headed toward his office. “I have some things to do. Just remembered.” He closed himself inside and ignored her startled glance.

  As he dropped his weight into the old leather chair behind his desk, he was assailed with so many memories, except the one that he needed the most.

  He sagged forward and placed his head in his hands, and tried to remember that night. He’d drunk so much to try and forget the woman, the forbidden woman, the woman he loved. He remembered the first drinks but he lost count of the ones after that. He’d been fully wasted by the time Eric shoved his sorry ass into the backseat of a car and then...then, Emelia had sat beside him.

  She’d been unable to take her eyes from him, and his flesh had hardened, so much so, that he could have pounded nails. It had been at that point that he’d covered himself with his hand. He wasn’t sure that if he hadn’t been so drunk as to whether or not he’d have pounced on her because his defenses had been down.

  He groaned and leaned back in his chair, the throb in his pants distracting.

  It was Emelia...It was. It had to be for him to remember the car journey. Or was it really a dream—a hopeful dream, and did she help him to his room?

  “Oh no.” Was his dream of Emelia not really a dream? Was he remembering fact?

  He felt sick to his stomach at the thought of being with Emelia and having no conscious recollection of it. But his stomach really rolled when he remembered why they couldn’t be together.

  Grabbing his cell, he quickly connected with Eric and hoped he was around because he felt his sanity slipping.

  Not only was Emelia his sister, but if that wasn’t bad enough, he was a priest. Dedicated to God. Being with anyone was a sin. The only reason he hadn’t been on his knees in his church begging for forgiveness was because he’d kept his hands to himself when his flesh had jerked with his release.

  Technically, he hadn’t masturbated, but he knew he’d been skirting the line…if him and Emelia had…done anything…how could he confess that sin?

  “Dante?” Eric’s voice echoed down his cell and brought him back to why he’d called.

  “Eric, I have a question for you?”

  “Not, how are you or anything? Just, I have a question for you. You’ve lost your manners, brother.”

  “I’m sorry.” He sat back and looked out of his window at the snow coming down. “I’m going out of my mind and need to know the truth about the night of Ramon’s wedding.”

  There was silence at the other end even though Dante thought he’d heard a mumbled curse.

  “You didn’t take me back to the hotel...Emelia did?” Dante asked, but he already knew the answer.

  “I knew you’d remember eventually.”

  “Why did you let me think that it had been you?”

  “Emelia, for whatever her reasoning, preferred that you thought it was me. Probably so you wouldn’t worry. For some reason, she always thinks about you first.”

  Just like he did her!

  Dante’s heart sank because he had a good idea why she didn’t want him to know that it had been her. “Do you know anything else?” he asked, hoping Eric had read between the lines.

  “Truthfully, no I don’t. But I suspect something more happened between you both at the hotel, and I don’t suppose you remember and want to fill me in.”

  Dante breathed heavily and wondered just how much more had happened than he could remember.

  “I don’t think so.”

  “You don’t want to fill me in or you don’t think anything else happened?” Eric asked.

  “Both,” Dante mumbled. “I remember the car and that’s about it, but I wasn’t sure whether or not it was fact as you led me to believe you’d been the one to get me back to the hotel.”

  Eric sighed. “Look, Emelia hasn’t said anything to me, but I’ll be seeing her tomorrow when we meet at the house in Montana. As you’re not talking to her, I’ll tell her you were asking now that your memory is coming back.”

  He was a grown man but acted like an adolescent. Even so, he had to talk to her, and thanks to Eric, he knew where she’d be for a few days.

  “I might take a trip home...but don’t mention anything to Emelia.”

  “I won’t. I need to go and change. I’m taking Sylvia out to dinner. You look after yourself.”

  “I will. You too.”

  They finished the call and Dante held his cell in his hand so tightly that he thought it would crack. He took a deep breath through his frustration instead of smashing his cell.

  Emelia was stubborn and, if she didn’t want anyone to know anything, you could guarantee that no one would know.

  Except he needed to know. He needed to remember. The fact that he couldn’t remember drove him crazy. Regardless of their situation, if he’d touched her, made
love to her, then he craved to remember the feel of her surrounding him.

  He’d go to hell, but he was already there to the point that he spent more time thinking about Emelia than he did his church and the people that relied on him.

  He’d had a baptism to do the other Sunday, and afterwards, when he’d been asked to hold the baby so her parents could take a photograph, all he’d been able to think about was never having a child of his own.

  He knew his defenses were down, and they had been since Christmas, but it had suddenly hit him in the gut and he hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Emelia holding their son or daughter in her arms.

  A painful dream.

  For a while, he’d been feeling distracted, more so than he usually was with Emelia, but the distraction had started to move over to his work. He found that it wasn’t as satisfying as it once had been.

  He hadn’t even been into town to just talk to the people who knew him, which wasn’t like him. He’d always been around and available, but the last month, he hadn’t had the energy to do it. It was no wonder Barbara constantly asked him if he was okay.

  Something had to give, and the boulder in his belly told him it wasn’t going to be as easy as he’d like to get back on track. He also knew that the best thing to do would be for him to let go of whatever happened with Emelia. He just didn’t think he was strong enough to do that with the cravings that lived inside of him.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Mornings in Montana were usually early, and loud. Not that day though. Emelia had been exhausted when she’d arrived the night before that she’d told her parents not to wake her up and that they’d see her when they saw her. She was glad she’d had the insight to say that because she’d slept like a log. All her sleepless nights had caught up to her, and she knew that she’d crash hard. And she did. She’d even missed Eric’s arrival.

  If it hadn’t been for the delay he had at the airport in Lexington, he would have arrived within thirty minutes of her flight and she would have waited for him. But no, he’d had a few hours delay. It wouldn’t have stopped him from getting up early to help around the farm. He loved the outdoors.

  Fighting back a yawn, and with a heavy sigh and a stretch, she pushed the quilt back and climbed from the snug warmness of her bed to pad over to the window.

  The snow had been coming down rather heavily by the time she’d reached the house. Her father had promised to use the SUV to go and collect Eric because the vehicle was made for adverse weather conditions.

  But, as she looked out at the snow covered landscape, there were only light flurries even though a thick layer covered the once cleared driveway. That was the beauty of her family home being in Montana, and she wouldn’t change it for the world.

  As she followed one of the flakes with her eyes, she couldn’t help the overwhelming sadness that suddenly came over her. Later, she’d be upsetting her family with her questions, and it hurt to think that it was because of her selfish need to be with Dante that made her go forth with what she knew. If it wasn’t for him, she didn’t think she’d ever go through with it.

  A chill crept through her thin pajamas, so she pulled back from the window and went into her bathroom, where she emerged fifteen minutes later fresh from a warm shower. Emelia felt better after being under the heavy spray of water and hoped that, after a large cup of coffee, she’d have the courage that she needed.

  It helped that Eric had come to be with her, but she knew when Diego found out, he’d be pissed at her for not confiding in him. While she continued to ponder about Diego, she slipped her legs into panties and jeans before she quickly fastened a bra in place and pulled a shirt and sweater on. Thick socks went on her feet, followed by her purple UGGS.

  Her hair was damp so she brushed it out before piling it on top of her head. She had no intention of going out anywhere so it would have to do because she couldn’t be bothered with a hair dryer.

  With a quick glance in the mirror, she left the sanctuary of her room and went looking for coffee first, then she’d find her brother before anything was said.

  “What do you mean that Dante is here?” Emelia fumed.

  She had it all planned out in her head. She’d tell her parents what she’d overheard. They’d confirm it. Then she’d go and find Dante and tell him. Of course, she didn’t think it would be as straightforward as she’d like, but she certainly didn’t think he’d come to Montana.

  “He knows you were the one to take him back to the hotel,” Eric admitted. “He remembered and called me, which is how he knows we were meeting here.”

  “Wait. What?” Her mind whirled as she felt the blood drain to her toes. “He remembers?” She met Eric’s gaze and wanted him to tell her he was joking.

  “He remembers the journey in the car or at least, that you were the one with him and not me. He doesn’t remember anything else, which makes me wonder what else there is for him to remember.”

  She wasn’t going there. No way. “I can’t. Please try and forget that.”

  Eric stared at her long and hard. “I want you to promise me that, while he’s here, you’ll tell him what happened. He needs to know, Emelia?”

  The silence settled between them while she realized that she didn’t have much choice. No matter how embarrassing it would get, she owed Dante the truth.

  “I promise. I’ll tell him.” She picked up her second coffee within the hour, and sat on the sofa across from where Eric had dropped his ass. “So, any advice as to how to go about this? Do I just blurt it out to Mom? Or do I get them both together and blurt it out with you in the room as well? Or...ugh, I don’t know.”

  She rested her feet on the coffee table and waited, wondering what Eric was thinking.

  “I think you’d be more comfortable talking to your mom alone. Am I right?”

  Sighing, she nodded. “I’ve always found it easier talking to one parent alone than them both together, and this time isn’t going to be easy...I’m so nervous, Eric.”

  “I know, Sis.”

  Her eyes snapped to his and he softly smiled. “You’ll always be that to me, and the more time I’ve thought about you and Dante, the more I realize that you were both made to be together. Just be prepared for the others, especially Diego, to not be as happy or understanding as I am.”

  “I know. There’s probably a lot of upset ahead, which is why I’ve always been so torn about saying anything.” She bit her lip and took the cup of coffee that Eric passed to her.

  “It won’t last, and everything is always best out in the open.”

  She heard footsteps heading toward the kitchen, and then the sound of someone quickly rummaging in the cupboard for a box of cereal. The flakes could be heard as the box was shook to judge if there was enough in the box. Everyone did that.

  “We’ll talk later,” she said quietly just as her mom entered the living room.

  “Morning.” Lucia smiled. “You’re both up early.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Her cherry red lips wrapped around his flesh while her gaze held his. His eyes fluttered and closed when he felt the first swirl of her tongue around the head of his dick, and just the sound of her moan when she tasted his precum was enough to nearly have him coming in her mouth.

  He groaned and arched off the bed with the pleasure that coursed through his body...so much pleasure…

  Dante shot up into a sitting position on his bed, his gasp heavy in the silence of the room while his heart pounded. A light sheen of sweat coated his skin while he lay back down and closed his eyes to try and pull himself together. At least, he hadn’t woken releasing all over himself like the previous times he’d had the erotic dream about him and Emelia.

  His flesh burned with need as his fists clenched at his sides and his legs twisted in the covers that were tangled around his feet. He continued to pant and started to fill his head with thoughts of his brothers. Anything to try and lesson how tense his body was.

  Eric entered his head first, because he
knew that he was already at the house. He would talk to him once he’d had his morning coffee and put something in his stomach. Out of all his brothers, Eric was the closest to him. All his brothers meant the world to him and he’d be there if any of them ever needed him, but Eric had always been the one that he’d gone to when he’d needed to talk or when he’d had enough of his own company.

  His fists released the death grip that they’d had on the bed as his body started to ease while thinking about his brother, but soon thoughts of Emelia, beautiful Emelia, filled his head, again. What would the others think if they knew of his love for her? Would they be as understanding as Eric was? Or would they be disgusted?

  The night before, he’d arrived late during the early hours of the morning. There had been a blizzard in Denver, which had prevented the flight from taking off. At least he’d arrived in one piece after the bumpy journey. Planes weren’t his favorite thing, and flying over the Rockies often resulted in a more than smooth flight.

  He sighed and twisted his head to glance at the clock: eleven. It had been a long while since he’d slept passed eight. He’d been exhausted.

  With his body under control, he felt able to head to his bathroom without his erection causing him issues. And as he stepped under the hot stream of water, the rest of his body started to relax.

  Tension had been his constant companion for weeks, more so since he’d talked to the bishop, who resided in Denver.

  Dante had made the arrangements for another Priest to take Mass in Frederick while he was gone, but the Bishop had requested a brief meeting with him before he’d caught his flight.

  Shampooing his dark hair, he groaned wondering how much the bishop had suspected. Bishop Colin Sommer had been there with him since before he’d joined the seminary. The bishop knew him better than the others in the clergy, so he’d know that something bothered him. He didn’t have many friends in the priesthood, more like acquaintances, apart from Colin, that was.