The Perfect Dress

by Brown, Carolyn

  Mitzi shut her eyes to keep from rolling them toward the ceiling. “And?”

  “We’re getting married so I thought it was best that I was honest. So I told him that he wasn’t the first, but he’d be the last.” Her chin quivered and the sniffles started again.

  “How about you? Had he had other women before you?” Jody asked.

  “Of course. He had the whole college experience. Frat parties. Women whose names he didn’t even know, all that kind of thing,” Ellie Mae answered.

  “And he wanted a virgin? That’s not fair,” Paula said. “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander.”

  “How did he not know that you’ve been in other relationships? Celeste is a small town,” Mitzi said.

  “He’s from up in Oklahoma. He moved to Greenville last fall. I met him at a church social down there, and we hit it off from the first day.” Her face turned crimson. “I kind of knew he was the one, so I played hard to get. We didn’t have sex until Thanksgiving.”

  Ellie Mae jumped like she’d been shot when another hard knock turned everyone’s attention toward the door again. “I don’t want to see him, not yet. Tell him to go away.”

  Mitzi cracked the door to find a tall, muscular guy on the other side holding his hat in one hand and a lawn chair in the other. The hat looked new. The lawn chair’s webbing was frayed and sagging.

  “I’m Quincy Roberts. Is Jody Andrews here? She said she worked at a wedding dress shop, and I believe this is the only one in town,” he said.

  Mitzi stuck her head back inside and said, “Jody, there’s someone here to see you.”

  “If it’s Lyle, tell him to go to hell,” Jody said.

  Mitzi raised both eyebrows. “It’s not Lyle.”

  With a puzzled expression, Jody left Ellie Mae’s side, but when she saw who was at the door, she grabbed Mitzi by the arm and said, “Don’t you dare leave me alone.”

  “Hello again, Jody. You forgot your chairs when you left. I’m returning them.” When Quincy smiled, his blue eyes twinkled.

  “Throw them in the trash. I don’t want ’em,” she said.

  “They’re still pretty good chairs, and could be rewebbed. How ’bout I just set them here on the porch? Would you be free to go for a cup of coffee with me?” Quincy asked her.

  “We’ve got sweet tea in the refrigerator,” Mitzi said before Jody could refuse. “And we’ve still got leftover cake. There’s a situation going on in the house, but y’all are welcome to sit in those lawn chairs and have a visit. Just go on and sit down. I’ll bring out tea and cake.”

  “That’s nice. I have a terrible sweet tooth.” Quincy unfolded the chairs and set them up a couple of feet apart.

  It took Mitzi only a few minutes to put pieces of cake on a couple of plates, fill glasses with ice and sweet tea, and take it outside on a tray. She set it on the porch between the chairs and turned to go back inside. But before she’d taken a step, Quincy’s phone rang.

  “Excuse me. I really have to take this call.” He stood up, left the porch, and took a few steps out into the yard.

  “I’m not talking to you for a week. You could have told him I wasn’t here,” Jody whispered. “Is Ellie Mae any better? You do realize she hasn’t paid her bill in full. We still need payment for all the flowers and her mother’s and sister’s dresses. I need to be in there calming her down.”

  “She’s relating to Paula better than me,” Mitzi whispered back to Jody. “And we both needed a break from her. Besides, I wanted to see what Quincy was like.”

  “You are a dead woman. I could have refused to go for coffee with him, and this could’ve been avoided,” Jody hissed out the side of her mouth.

  “Do I need to be careful what I eat or drink? Are you going to poison me?” Mitzi asked.

  “I’d like to. Do you realize that only one person needs to drive down the street and see me out here with him?” Her phone rang before she could finish the sentence.

  “Hello, Mama.”

  Jody shot a dirty look toward Mitzi and listened for a good thirty seconds before she said, “No, Mama, I have not been cheating on Lyle. I only met the man this afternoon. He’s buying the property where our trailer used to be, and he brought my lawn chairs back to me.”

  Another few seconds passed and another dirty look or two, then Jody said, “I’m hanging up. I don’t have to listen to this.” She shoved the phone back in her purse and sent another sideways look toward Mitzi. “See what you caused.”

  “Hey, it’s either have a nice, pleasant conversation with a handsome guy or listen to Ellie Mae whine until dark. Your choice, but if you’re smart, you’ll stay out here even after he’s gone,” Mitzi said.

  Quincy ended his call and rejoined them on the porch. “Cake looks great, and I am thirsty. That was the Realtor that has the property. We were discussing my offer,” he said. “I don’t know that I caught your name.”

  “Mitzi Taylor,” she said. “And I should go on back inside.”

  “Hey, are you kin to Harry Taylor?” Quincy asked.

  Mitzi stopped at the door and turned around. “He’s my father.”

  “Good man. I’ve had some dealings with him in the oil business. He’s the one who used to inspect things until he retired.” Quincy sat down in the chair and turned his attention to Jody.

  “See y’all later.” Mitzi escaped back into the house to find Ellie Mae sipping sweet tea and having an Oreo.

  What a day, Mitzi thought as she sank down onto the sofa across from Paula and Ellie Mae. Instead of floating on air because Graham kissed me, I’m wrung out from all this drama. I wonder if he thinks I’m still a virgin—that since I’m a larger woman, no man would’ve ever wanted to go to bed with me.

  “I’ve got to make a bathroom run,” Paula said as she pushed up from the sofa. “Too much lemonade this afternoon.”

  “I understand, and I think Mama might be getting suspicious about me needing to go so often,” Ellie Mae said. “This tastes even better than ice cream.”

  Mitzi suddenly felt guilty because she hadn’t thought to get out a quart of ice cream and four spoons. That was the standard problem solver in her friendship with Paula and Jody. “Would you like a bowl of ice cream?”

  Ellie Mae took another cookie from the package. “Not when I can have these. I’m a chocoholic.”

  Paula covered the short distance from the small half bath at the end of the foyer and sat down beside Ellie Mae. “Sometimes ice cream works. Sometimes it takes cookies. Feelin’ better? Ready to talk to him now?”

  “Not yet. He really hurt my feelings,” Ellie Mae said.

  Jody came inside at the same time someone knocked on the back door.

  “I bet that’s Granny.” Mitzi headed that way, not ready to talk about the Rita-and-Graham situation with Fanny Lou but glad for an excuse to get away from the foyer drama again. She practiced her we’re taking it real slow speech all the way through the kitchen. No way was she telling her granny about the kisses.

  She unlocked the door and opened it to find Clinton Ballard. His face was set in stone, and his arms were crossed over his chest.

  “May I help you?” Her tone dripped icicles, but she couldn’t help it.

  He opened the screen door. “I want to talk to Paula.”

  Mitzi blocked his way into the kitchen. “Too bad. She doesn’t want to talk to you.”

  “So she told you about us, did she?” he growled.

  “Yep, so we all know you’re a son of a bitch,” Mitzi answered.

  “I’m going to talk to her.” He started to push his way past her.

  Mitzi put her hands on his chest and walked him right back outside. “You can wait right here. I’ll see if she wants to even lay eyes on you. If not, then you’ll have sixty seconds to get off our property.”

  “Or what?” He threw open the door again.

  “Or I’ll call the police. If they get here before I can load my shotgun, I’ll let them take you to jail. If not, then
they can call the coroner,” Mitzi answered.

  “Just go get her and stop making threats,” he growled.

  Mitzi reached for the gun hanging above the door on two hooks and racked in a shell.

  He put up both hands and stammered, “Take it easy, lady. And for your information, I am a policeman.”

  “Not in Celeste, you’re not. You stay right there while I ask Paula if she’d like to visit with you.” Mitzi slammed the door in his face. She stopped at the cabinet, took down the tequila, had two big gulps right out of the bottle to steady her nerves, and laid the shotgun on the table. If Ellie Mae saw the gun, she might take it away from her and shoot Darrin. Then she made her way to the foyer and told Paula that someone was there to see her.

  Paula raised an eyebrow. “Who?”

  “Clinton Ballard is at the back door. The shotgun is loaded and right there if you need it. Want me to go with you?”

  “Yes.” Paula’s chin quivered. “Why would he come here?”

  “He wouldn’t tell me.”

  “Ellie Mae, we’ve got some business to take care of but we’ll be right back,” Mitzi said.

  “I’m okay,” Ellie Mae whimpered. “But you won’t be gone long, will you?”

  “No, honey,” Paula answered. “Just a few minutes. Can we bring you anything when we come back?”

  “No, I’ve got cookies right here.” She tried to smile.

  “Okay, then.” Mitzi patted her on the shoulder and then almost jogged to the kitchen. She picked up the gun as they passed the table.

  “She says you might have a word or two, but you’re to stay on the porch,” Mitzi told him as she took a couple of steps to the side so he could see Paula.

  “It took you long enough,” he growled as he reached for the door.

  “Oh, no!” Mitzi pointed the gun right at his crotch. “Don’t even think about coming inside.”

  “Do we have to talk through a screen door? Can’t I come inside the house?” he asked. “Paula, I need to talk to you privately.”

  “Whatever you’ve got to say to me can be said in front of Mitzi, and if she says we keep the screen between us, then that’s what we do,” Paula told him.

  “Okay, then. I’m sorry that I led you on, but I was lonely. Kayla was sick all the time, and I was trying to take care of my father, and—”

  Paula held up a palm. “Real apologies don’t need buts, ifs, or ands. You should’ve been honest with me, Clinton.”

  “I know.” He ducked his head, but it wasn’t very convincing.

  “Why are you even here?” Paula’s hands knotted into fists.

  “To ask you not to tell Graham because he might tell Kayla and it would ruin my marriage. I hate talking through this screen. Someone might see me out here,” he said.

  “You got a choice. You can stay out there or come inside and I’ll help Mitzi clean up the blood,” Paula said.

  “That’s pretty harsh.” Clinton’s head jerked back up and he glared at her.

  Paula eyed him from toes to eyes, wondering all the time what in the world she’d ever seen in him to begin with. “Go home to your wife. Try being faithful to her. And stay away from me. I never want to see you again.” She slammed the door and slid down the wall. She dropped her head to her knees and took a deep breath. “Do you think he could tell that I’m pregnant?”

  Mitzi sat down cross-legged in front of her. “Nope. He’s only interested in saving his own hide. The bastard doesn’t care that he broke your heart or got you pregnant. Can I get you anything?”

  “No, I’ll be fine when my heart stops pounding. Been a helluva day, hasn’t it? Don’t let it ruin your perfect time with Graham. And please don’t tell Graham, not to appease Clinton, because I don’t give a damn about him, but for the baby’s sake. If he said something to Kayla or Rita, it could eventually get back to Clinton that I’m pregnant.”

  Mitzi held up a pinkie finger. “Remember when we did this when we were little girls?”

  Paula linked her finger with it. “We’re big girls now, and it’s still friendship before relationship.”

  “After today, I’m not so sure that I ever want a relationship,” Mitzi said.

  “Don’t let what’s going on with me and Jody spoil what you might have. Good Lord!” Paula eased her way to a standing position when someone knocked on the back door again. “If it’s Clinton again, load that shotgun. This time I mean to do more than scare him. We can drag him inside, and then bury him in the cellar out back soon as it gets dark. The dirt floor won’t be too hard to dig up. I’ll even repair the hole in the screen myself.”

  Mitzi eased the door open a crack and shook her head. “It’s Darrin. Do we let him in or not?”

  “Sure, we do. Unless you want to offer to let Ellie Mae crash on our sofa upstairs,” Paula answered.

  Mitzi opened the door wide and unlatched the screen door. “I suppose you’re here to see Ellie Mae?”

  “I’ve been driving all over town, looking for her car. I finally spotted it out front but there wasn’t a parking space.” His eyes were swollen, as if he’d been crying, and his hands trembled when he motioned toward his truck. “Tell her that I made a huge mistake. I love her, and we’re havin’ a baby, and—”

  “We’re not the ones to tell all that.” Paula pointed. “She’s in the foyer, and you might lead with the line about loving her.”

  He rushed that way, and in a few seconds, Jody joined them in the kitchen. “Quincy is gone, and I refused to go for ice cream or coffee with him. Darrin is still here, but they don’t need a referee since he dropped down on his knees, laid his head in her lap, and cried like a baby. We might as well sit out here until it’s done. There ain’t no way we can go to the sewing room or upstairs without interrupting them. I could barely get through the foyer.”

  Paula was the first one to pull out a chair and sit. “It’s like we got a sign outside. Clinton was here.”

  “You’re shittin’ me,” Jody gasped.

  “Nope, not one bit. Mitzi even loaded the shotgun,” Paula said.

  “Is he dead? I didn’t hear a shot. Please tell me that he’s layin’ on the back porch, bleedin’ out,” Jody said.

  “No, he’s not dead, but he might be if he gets tangled up with another woman and she finds out he’s married,” Mitzi answered.

  “One can always hope.” Paula went to the refrigerator and brought out what was left of a cheesecake. “If he was out there with a gutshot, I’d eat a piece of this, then go brush my teeth before I called the ambulance.”

  Mitzi got out three forks and laid them on the table. “It’s probably going to take a while for the lovebirds to get things settled between them.”

  “If they can make up and be happy, it’ll be worth it,” Jody said. “But I’m disappointed y’all didn’t hurt Clinton, the sorry bastard, a little bit. You could have at least used the butt of the gun to wreck his balls.”

  “I just want him to disappear so I can get on with my life. Things are getting quiet in there. Think it’s safe to peek around the corner?” Paula said.

  Jody pushed back her chair and leaned around the doorframe for a look. “They’re kissing. We don’t have to offer to let Ellie Mae move in with us.”

  “I would have vetoed that,” Paula said. “She’s way too dramatic for me to put up with her for more than an hour or two. When they get done making out and leave, let’s forget about sewing. I want to go upstairs, bring up a movie on Netflix, and forget about all this crap.”

  “Amen to that.” Jody had barely taken a seat again and picked up her fork when Ellie Mae and Darrin came into the room, holding hands and having trouble taking their eyes off each other.

  “The wedding is back on,” Ellie Mae said. “We’ve got it all worked out—Darrin has got a promotion and we’re transferring to Dumas, Texas, right after the wedding. We don’t know anyone there, so it’ll be a brand-new start for both of us.”

  “That’s great,” Jody said. “See you Friday f
or a fitting?”

  “I’ll be here, and thanks to you all for the support today,” she said.

  “And for letting me come inside.” Darrin grinned sheepishly. “I acted like a jerk, and I know it.”

  “Yes, you did,” Mitzi said. “But we don’t drown men or shoot them for one mistake. After that it gets kind of iffy.”

  He leaned down and kissed Ellie Mae on the forehead. “Yes, ma’am. It won’t happen again. I almost ruined the best thing in my life because of my pride. I’ve learned my lesson.”

  “See y’all in a few days,” Ellie Mae said as they left by the back door and passed Fanny Lou coming inside.

  “Well, now if that wasn’t downright weird,” she said. “Ellie Mae looked like she’d been crying and yet was the happiest person alive. So what’s happening?”

  “Which story do you want first? The one about my baby daddy, or Jody’s new boyfriend, or the one about Mitzi kissing Graham?” Paula asked.

  “Or maybe you’d rather hear about Ellie Mae?” Mitzi kicked Paula under the table.

  “Given all those choices, I think we need to go upstairs to some more comfortable chairs,” Fanny Lou answered. “Mitzi, lock the doors. Jody, get us some chips and dip. Paula, you can bring up three beers and a glass of sweet tea for you. The rest of us deserve something stronger with stories like these to tell.”

  “I don’t have a new boyfriend.” Jody gathered two bags of chips from the cabinet and a jar of salsa from the refrigerator.

  “Even if you don’t, it’d be good for Lyle to think you do. Sorry bastard,” Fanny Lou fumed on the way up the stairs. “I heard that two men had been knockin’ on the back door this afternoon. I came to be sure y’all hadn’t put in a brothel.”

  Mitzi had been following her upstairs but stopped and gasped, “Granny, that’s not funny.”

  Fanny Lou looked down at her from the landing. “I didn’t think so, either, especially when you didn’t ask me to be the madam. That’s why I came to see what was going on here. Let’s get settled in y’all’s livin’ room, and each of you can tell me all about it. And we’ll start with Jody, since I want to know why Quincy Roberts was sitting on the porch with you.”