“Which means we’re no closer than we were before.” Miracle slumped down low. She looked depressed.
“Should I make you some green tea?” Zing asked.
“Sure. Why not?”
Miracle followed Zing to the kitchen and watched her fill the kettle and put it on to boil. She sniffed. “I’m going to miss you, you know that?”
“Maybe Bertha will let me come back for a visit. I could tell her how miserable you’d be without me.”
Miracle brightened. “You think so?”
Zing sighed and sat next to Miracle at the bar. “No. My boss, Bertha, is mean.”
“Bosses are like that.”
“Except for Nell.”
“Yeah, except for Nell.”
At the mention of Nell’s name, Zing grew sad. She missed Nell and she wasn’t even gone yet. Like Miracle said, she was pre-missing Nell. She’d never felt a sadness this heavy. It seemed to weigh her down. She could hardly lift her head. And before she knew what she was doing, she was crying. Big, salty tears ran down both cheeks. And Zing knew that this was a sadness so big, so heavy, that no amount of ice cream could ever fix it.
***
Later that night, Zing lay in Nell’s arms. “I brought work clothes so I won’t upset Carol in the morning.”
“You think of everything,” Nell said tracing her fingers up and down Zing’s tummy.
“Except how to stay with you forever,” Zing said, feeling morose. This was a new sensation for her and she didn’t like it.
“I would think falling in love with me and curing my broken heart satisfies the selfless act clause you told me about.”
“I thought the same thing. So I asked Annabelle to find out for me. She’s contacting Human Resources to see if it qualifies. But I’m pretty sure Bertha won’t allow it. She’s got veto power.”
“I have this strange feeling it’ll all work out,” Nell said, as her lips followed her fingers down Zing’s stomach and kissed that special place between Zing’s legs.
After their lovemaking, Zing lay watching Nell sleep. She looked so peaceful and happy. And Zing swore Nell glowed with love like she did. How could Bertha want to take this away from her? And what about Betty and the florist? They could very well be humans that were angels or angels that were human. How did that work? She needed to find out, but no one was talking.
Annabelle materialized in the room. She leaned against the wall. “You make her happy,” she whispered, cocking her head in Nell’s direction.
“I’d like to keep making her happy.” Zing studied Annabelle’s face. “Are you here to tell me that Bertha said no?”
“Not exactly.”
“What does that mean?”
“Bertha said your loving Nell isn’t selfless. But. . . it’s what she didn’t say that I find encouraging,” Annabelle said.
“Oh.” Zing was confused. “What did Bertha not say?”
“It was more the way she didn’t say it,” Annabelle said.
Now Zing was really confused. “Oh. Well, how did Bertha say what she didn’t say?”
“I just think there’s something Bertha isn’t telling us,” Annabelle said. “Like you becoming human can be done, but it’s something you have to discover on your own.”
“But why?”
“Because then too many angels might abdicate their positions.”
“Oh.” Zing hadn’t thought about that. “What should I do?”
“Enjoy Nell while you can,” Annabelle said simply. “I’ll be around if you need me.” Then she disappeared.
Nell stirred. “Zing? Who were you talking to?” Her was voice scratchy with sleep.
“My friend Annabelle,” Zing said, stroking Nell’s cheek.
“An angel friend?”
“Yes. She’s Miracle’s guardian angel.”
“She didn’t see me naked, did she?”
“No. I covered up your boobs.”
“What did Annabelle say?” Nell asked.
“She said I should enjoy you while I can.”
“Mmmm. Good advice,” Nell said. She peppered kisses on Zing’s neck.
“I thought so, too,” Zing said, pulling Nell into a deep kiss. She fully intended to enjoy Nell as much and as often as possible.
***
The next morning Carol was back at work. Zing was glad. After Carol had stomped out yesterday, Zing had made a mess of the chocolate éclairs. Homeless Tom was delighted because his box was stuffed full of the misshapen pastries.
“I’ve decided I’m not angry with you anymore,” Carol stated.
Zing spread glaze over five dozen warm donuts. “I’m glad, but why have you changed your mind?”
Carol sighed and continued filling the éclairs with cream. Nell stood on the other side of the kitchen, hand-mixing banana nut batter for muffins, and softly singing, The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.
“I think that’s directed at you. However Roberta Flack definitely sings it better,” Carol said.
“The first time Nell ever saw my face, her head was bashed and she’d lost a lot of hair.”
“She’s already rewritten your love story. We all do it.”
“Miracle says when humans do that it’s called revisionist history.”
“And she’d be right,” Carol said.
“She’s a very intelligent woman,” Zing said.
“Among other things,” Carol said, smiling to herself. “Are you spending the night at Nell’s tonight?”
Zing was caught off guard. She looked at Carol, trying to gauge if she were on the verge of another stomp out.
“I won’t be mad if you are. After all, I want to stay the night with Miracle,” Carol said.
“You should stay overnight. Then you’ll know for certain if you’ll like living there. Remember to use the fancy goat’s milk soap so you’ll smell nice. It’ll make Miracle happy to know you like the soap.”
“I’ll probably shower before I get there.”
“Oh, don’t do that. Miracle is looking forward to having a romantic bath with you—like with candles and fancy soap.”
Carol was aghast. “She told you that?”
Zing smiled coyly. “She might have mentioned that she’d enjoy a sexy bath with you. I think I’ll invite Nell to sit in the bathtub with me.”
“You need to work on your subtleness,” Carol said.
Nell had snuck up behind them. “Don’t you dare. I like your no-nonsense approach to love,” she said.
“Ooo-kay,” Carol said with an eye roll. The fryer timer went off.
“I’ve been thinking about time. You know, I’m really old by human standards, and this last month has been the best time in my entire life. So time, this time, is a time I’m glad I’m in.” Zing said, smiling at Nell.
“That made absolutely no sense,” Carol said.
“Love seldom does,” Nell said. She pecked Zing on the cheek.
Chapter Fourteen
The last five days of Zing’s earthly existence were the best of her life.
Zing held Nell’s hand as they walked back to her apartment. They’d had a picnic in the park with Mindy (who’d been forgiven for her transgression), Carol, and Homeless Tom. Zing had arranged it. She wanted to say goodbye. No one, not even Annabelle, had figured out a way for her to stay. Zing knew that Nell was heartsick, but they both tried to live in the moment and ignore the sadness.
“So what will happen? Do you evaporate or just disappear piece by piece?” Nell asked. She bit her lip and blinked back tears.
“I don’t know. I’ve never done this before. I guess I’ll just be here until I’m not,” Zing answered.
They waited at the crosswalk for the white man on the traffic signal to indicate it was safe to cross the street. When Zing had first arrived, she thought the white man was nice and the orange man was angry. It took her a few days of watching other people to deduce their true meaning.
Zing stared down into her beautiful eyes. “I will always be there for
you, you know, just not in this form.”
“I know,” Nell said.
A man wearing cross-trainers and running shorts ran across the street. Thinking it was time to cross, Nell stepped off the curb and walked into the street.
Zing glanced up at the traffic signal. It was still the orange man. The runner had broken the rule.
A garbage truck sped into the intersection.
A loud alarm screeched in Zing’s head. The garbage truck was headed straight for Nell!
Zing didn’t think, she reacted with lightning fast reflexes honed by 1,004 years of guardian angelship. She leapt into the intersection and forcefully threw Nell out of the truck’s path.
The garbage truck screeched its brakes and blared its horn.
But it was too late.
The truck was headed right for Zing.
Time slowed. Nell’s eyes met Zing’s. Nothing moved. It was just the two of them and the enormous garbage truck coming straight for Zing. It was at that moment that Zing knew what it was to truly experience selfless love.
Nell screamed, “No!”
That was the last thing Zing heard.
The truck collided with Zing, tossing her body high into the air. Zing’s last conscious thought was, “So this is what it feels like to fly.”
Zing hit the pavement, her body bouncing like a rag doll.
She didn’t move.
Everything froze. The truck was still. The crowd of people was still. Then Nell broke the stillness with an ear-piercing scream. She pushed through the crowd and ran to Zing, shouting over and over, “No, no, no, no. . .”
***
When Zing opened her eyes, Annabelle stood over her. “You have a real flair for the dramatic,” Annabelle said.
Zing blinked. “What happened?”
“Well, what was the last thing you remember?” Annabelle asked.
Zing sat up and shook her head to get the fuzziness out. “Getting hit by a garbage truck,” she said. She looked down at herself and didn’t see any blood or gore.
“That’s pretty much what happened. The good news is that you saved Nell’s life when you pushed her out of the way. All she’s got are scraped up hands and knees.”
“I did? Thank goodness.” Zing stood. Her angel form felt weird after wearing a body for so long. Her head spun, and she stumbled. Annabelle quickly manifested a chair. Zing sank gratefully into it.
Frida, another guardian angel, handed Zing a bottle of water. Zing looked around her. She was surrounded by her former coworkers at HQ. Zing gratefully chugged the water. Finally, she asked, “I hope I didn’t pee my pants when I got hit.”
Annabelle shrugged.
“You didn’t,” Gloria said. She was another of Zing’s coworkers. “Here, look at the monitor. You can see yourself, I mean, your human self.”
A large white screen appeared where none had been before. Zing stared at it. She saw the accident unfold. It happened so fast. It felt like it took twenty minutes when it was happening, but now Zing saw that it really only lasted a few seconds.
She watched her body lie motionless in the middle of the street with people crowded around it. Nell pushed through the crowd and threw herself next to Zing’s body. She was sobbing hysterically.
Zing saw her body twitch. Not much. Just the tiniest bit. Zing leaned forward in her chair and stared hard at the monitor. “Am I breathing? I mean, my human body. Is it still breathing?”
“Well, technically you’re still alive,” Annabelle said. “They have you hooked up to machines and those machines are keeping you alive.”
Annabelle waved her hand at the monitor and the picture changed. Zing saw her human body lying in a hospital bed. Tubes and wires were hooked up to her. There was a mask over her nose and mouth. The body’s chest rose and fell.
“How come I’m not dead? Shouldn’t I be dead?” Zing asked.
Bertha suddenly appeared in front of Zing. “By all rights, you should be dead. Why you’re not, I haven’t the foggiest—probably because you’re so damned stubborn,” Bertha said. “Good job on the save, by the way. That was a perfect textbook rescue. We might use the footage of that in some of our training classes.”
“So, I did the right thing?” Zing asked.
Bertha nodded. “Nell’s life is far from over. She was not intended to get crushed by a garbage truck.”
“What about. . .” Zing had tears in her eyes. “What happens now?”
Bertha put her hands on her ample hips and said, “Your days as a human being are over.”
“But what about Nell? She’s given me her heart and soul. I can’t just leave her like this.” Zing gestured to the monitor where it showed Nell bent over Zing’s prone body. Nell was sobbing. Carol and Miracle stood in the background, hugging each other, crying.
“You did your job. Now it’s over. And the sooner you get that through your head the better,” Bertha said. She turned and stomped off. After ten feet, she stopped and turned back around. “Oh, and welcome back.” Then she left.
Zing ran to the monitor. She lightly touched Nell’s face on the screen. She whispered, “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”
Annabelle put her hand on Zing’s shoulder. She leaned down and whispered in Zing’s ear where none of her coworkers could overhear, “Let’s go for a walk.”
***
They walked slowly. Zing was still getting used to being in angel form again. She figured it was like getting her sea legs. They stopped walking when they reached the Zen garden. It was fashioned after the lovely gardens of Kenrokuen—one of the three most beautiful gardens in Japan. According to the head gardener, Ito, she’d built it like the original garden, so that it incorporated the six attributes important to a Zen-like quality of reflection. (Bertha had originally wanted a garden modeled after Eden. But after the infamous apple tree shenanigans, she consented to a Zen garden instead.)
Zing didn’t know much about any of that Zen stuff. All she knew was that the garden was a place to get away from her desk and blow off steam. “Let’s go in,” Zing said.
“Let’s not and say we did,” Annabelle countered.
Zing took her arm and pulled her onto the gravel walkway that led to the Zen garden. “I won’t do anything bad. I just want to get one last bit of reflection before we have to go back to the grind.”
“You promise? Last time you made Ito really mad and we had to sit through that anger management seminar.”
“She came after me with a rake,” Zing said.
“You deserved it,” Annabelle said. They stood looking at the smooth sand with perfect lines made by Ito’s rake. There was one strategically placed boulder sitting at the far end of the garden and a smaller one set off to its side. It was very peaceful. Annabelle breathed in deeply, closing her eyes and attempting to center herself.
“Did Ito miss me while I was gone?” Zing asked.
“Actually, she did. She came looking for you after a week of undisturbed peace in her perfectly-raked Zen garden.”
To Zing, this seemed like the perfect invitation. She made a run for it, skipping through the garden, twirling like a dervish, and destroying the perfectly aligned sand. She climbed up on the larger boulder with a big grin on her face.
Annabelle opened her eyes and screamed. “You promised!”
“I lied,” Zing said. She jumped off the boulder and landed a perfect 360, destroying the one spot of sand that had been left unspoiled.
She faced Annabelle and said, “I thought that would make me feel better.”
“Did it?”
“No, not really. I miss Nell.” She reached up to wipe away a tear, and then she realized she didn’t have tears anymore. “I think I stubbed my heart. It hurts really bad. Worse than stubbing a toe even.”
At that moment, Frida came running up to them. “I thought I’d find you here,” she said, breathlessly. She leaned over, hands on her knees, and tried to catch her breath.
“What is it?” Annabelle said. “What’s the big
hurry?”
Frida straightened up. “Bertha is fit to be tied. Zing, you’re not brain dead. I mean, you’re human body isn’t. The doctors have taken you off all the machines and your body is breathing on its own. You’re in a coma and. . .”
“And what?” Zing asked.
Frida continued, “And Bertha is pissed. She keeps pacing in front of the monitor and muttering something about Nell keeping you alive.”
“How could Nell keep my body alive? She’s not a doctor.”
Frida shook her head. “I’m not sure. But Bertha keeps muttering something about love. About a love so big that it can’t die.”
Zing grabbed Frida by the shoulders. “What’s Nell doing?”
“She’s with Carol and Miracle and they’re all sitting around your bed. Betty is there, too.”
“How do you know about Betty?” Zing asked. She knew Annabelle had been keeping tabs on her, but how did Frida know?
“Oh, we’ve all been watching you. You were like our very own soap opera.”
“You didn’t watch during the intimate moments, did you?” Zing asked. She certainly hoped they hadn’t. She didn’t want the whole office to see her with her ass up in the air making animal noises.
“No, that would have been an infringement of your guardian angel civil rights,” Frida said, pouting.
“I made them turn off the monitor,” Annabelle said, narrowing her eyes at Frida. “Believe me, they wanted to watch.”
“It’s not like it was you, Zing the angel,” Frida said, pouting even more.
“What was it like?” Zing asked.
“It was like you were acting,” Frida said.
“Yeah, but that’s just it. I wasn’t acting,” Zing said. She plopped down onto a wooden bench. Annabelle sat on one side of her and Frida sat on the other. They each held one of Zing’s hands.
“What if I told you I might know how to help?” Frida asked softly.
“Help me get back into my human body?” Zing asked.
Frida nodded. She pulled a ring of keys out of her robe pocket.
Annabelle gasped.
“What are those?” Zing asked.
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