Hilde nodded, settled into the seat and closed her eyes.
“Sleep, mein Liebling, and dream about your sisters,” he said.
The trip to Hamburg wasn’t the joyous event they had originally planned, but one of sorrow and worry. Hilde’s family was equally agitated upon their arrival. Hamburg had experienced the same outbursts of violence as Berlin, and while the quarter of the Dremmer family had been spared, they’d heard the radio reports and worried.
But Carl and Emma had made it a rule not to make any negative comments in front of their teenage daughters because they were afraid Julia or Sophie might blurt out something inappropriate at school.
Nobody wanted to get caught criticizing the Nazi regime as that was a sure way to become the next victim. Thus it was only in the evenings after the girls had gone to bed that Q and Hilde felt comfortable voicing their concerns to her parents.
“I just don’t see how these atrocities can continue,” Q stated.
Carl nodded. “I agree with you, but what are the options? The Jews are powerless to fight back, and anyone even suspected of showing them sympathy is likely to be treated as a traitor.”
“But where will our nation end up if everyone just stands by and turns a blind eye?”
Carl stared for long moments at Q and Hilde before he said, “You two are young and without responsibilities. But I just turned fifty-three and have a wife and two teenagers depending on me. I may not agree with what the Nazis are doing, but I can’t afford to battle them.”
Q didn’t want to go down that route and changed the topic of the discussion. “A few days ago, we received a letter from my cousin Fanny in America. She invited us over to visit.”
Emma joined the discussion. “You should definitely go while you still can. Once you have children, travelling that far won’t be so easy.”
Hilde giggled. “Q’s mother gave us the same advice before we embarked on our honeymoon.” Then she kissed Q lightly on the cheek and whispered in his ear, “It sounds like everyone is waiting for grandchildren.”
Q smiled. He was getting the same impression. “We were planning to visit Fanny next summer.”
“You shouldn’t wait too long,” Carl said and lit a cigarette, offering one to Q. “Who knows how long it will be before we are at war, and you won’t be able to leave the country for leisure trips.”
Q nodded. It had been time-consuming to secure the visa and papers for their honeymoon in Europe, how much more challenging would it be two years later to travel to America?
“We’ll send a letter to Fanny right away.”
Chapter 14
The Kristallnacht was only the first of many terror campaigns against the Jewish people in both Germany and annexed Austria. Q was in a constant state of alert, a premonition of worse things to come looming in his subconscious.
His faith in the good of humanity had been severely shattered as he witnessed time after time what people could do with their hatred. Nothing was the way it was before, and Q was appalled by the actions of his compatriots.
As New Year arrived, he was still dealing with guilt over Jakob’s death, moping around without finding joy in even the things he liked most.
“Q, you have to stop this. You are not responsible for Jakob’s death,” Hilde said once and again, but Q refused to listen. His mood had been steadily declining, and he was slipping into a deep depression. The only thing to lighten his mood was planning their upcoming visit to his cousin Fanny in America.
“What is the weather like in Forest Hills?” Hilde asked as they sat over dinner.
“June through August are the hottest months of the year. Fanny wrote the temperatures can be well above 80° Fahrenheit, which is close to 30° Celsius.”
Hilde smiled. “I’ll need summer dresses. Maybe I should start to do some shopping?”
Against his will, Q had to chuckle. If life was only that easy. He doubted Hilde could buy summer dresses right then. Not in January and not in a Germany singularly focused on war.
Without warning, his good humor turned into anger, and his frustration burst out. “The whole damn nation is focused on war. Every industry has been re-purposed to keep the war machine running smoothly. There’s no liberty to develop me scientifically. All my work is redirected to research war-relevant things they want to use as weapons.”
Q pushed over an empty glass as he talked himself into a rage.
He went on, “Can you believe those narrow-minded officials in charge laughed at the inventions Otto and I presented them several years ago. And now they are feverishly trying to produce something similar, and yet inferior.”
Hilde moved the glass out of his reach before she filled it with water. “I thought you were relieved that the government didn’t buy your inventions?”
“I was. I am.” Q sighed. “I couldn’t have lived with the knowledge that my inventions are used to kill innocent people simply because of their heritage. But it still hurts that those arrogant men refused my work and think they can do better on their own.” He paused and ran a hand through his hair. “And you know what is the worst?”
Hilde looked reluctant to ask. “No. What?”
“I used to think a weapon as being neither good nor bad, it just is. But humans will always abuse them. Allow any of those testosterone-driven lads free use of a weapon and he will use it against his fellow human. Hatred, fear, and the sense of power will do that to him.”
Hilde put a hand on his arm. “You’re exaggerating, my love. Mankind is not that bad, and things surely will get better.”
“No, they won’t.” Q buried his head in his hands, the evil of the entire world weighing him down.
“Maybe we should look at extending our trip to America to several months, rather than just visiting for a few weeks?” Hilde suggested.
He looked up. Surprised. A zing of euphoria rushed through his veins. “You would? I mean… our trip to America is the one thing to make me happy, but whenever I think about having to leave and come back here, I fall back into my depressive state of mind.”
“Then we should apply for green cards in America,” Hilde said.
Q looked at her with wide eyes. She was the one to resist that idea when he first mentioned it. But so many things had changed during the last year. The situation in Germany was hopeless. Hitler would never back down until he got everything he wanted. Austria. Sudeten territories. What would be next on his list?
“Isn’t that being cowardly to use the easy way out and run?” he whispered.
“No. You’ve done so much already.” Hilde put a hand on his arm.” Maybe you’ll be of better use against the Nazi regime from outside, where you can concentrate on your research work. Like this echo-sound system to locate ships and airplanes you told me about.”
He’d almost forgotten about his echo-sound theories. The Royal Air Force had shown interest but had asked him to deliver a working prototype, not just theories on paper.
“Maybe you’re right, and it’s not cowardly to emigrate. I guess, I’m not cut out to be a hero.”
“You are my hero,” Hilde said and circled the table to sit on his lap. For the first time since finding Jakob’s body, Q was filled with hope and excitement at the possibilities that lay before them.
He held her close and said, “Let’s go to the embassy first thing in the morning and turn in our applications for a green card.”
Chapter 15
Several weeks later, they received a letter with the denial of their requested travel visa. The reason stated was that green card applicants couldn’t also hold a travel visa. Probably out of fear that those persons would simply not return when their allowed time was up.
Q and Hilde were suitably disappointed, but still hopeful. The drawing for the green card lottery would take place later in the year, and they decided to travel then. Meanwhile, they tried to live as normal a life as possible.
When Gone with the Wind came to the movie theater, Hilde convinced Q to take her to the premiere. It had occupie
d the headlines for weeks, and all her friends wanted to see Scarlet O’Hara and Rhett Butler. It was a welcome distraction from dull reality.
Hilde was wearing a new two-piece dress with a fitted, pencil skirt, and a fitted jacket that fanned out below her waist like a short skirt. The long sleeves and deep burgundy color gave her skin a healthy glow. The matching three-inch heels made her feel like Scarlett herself.
She giggled and daydreamed about a dashing Rhett Butler carrying her away on his horse. She couldn’t understand why Q thought the movie was cheesy.
“You truly didn’t like it?” Hilde asked as they walked home.
“No. Scarlett was a selfish brat.”
“Yes, but she endured so much, didn’t you feel even a modicum of sympathy for her?” Hilde pouted.
“Not really. I agree that war is awful and she lost so much, but that doesn’t excuse her behavior. Not in my book.”
Hilde sighed and shook her head. “We’ll just have to agree to disagree.”
“Very well.” Q paused and looked at her shoes. “Are you sure you want to walk home in those? We can always take a tram.”
“No. It’s such a lovely evening, and I need some fresh air.”
“You look beautiful,” he said, pulling her close to his side.
“Thank you.” She tucked her handbag beneath her elbow and slipped her gloved hand in the crook of her husband’s arm. The small hat she wore had a piece of netting that fell over the top to just below her eyes. This kind of netting was the current fashion and seemed to be showing up on most of the new hats this year.
She looked up at her husband and grinned. “You’re looking rather dashing yourself this evening.”
Q grinned back at her. “I can’t let you receive all of the admiring looks, now can I?”
Hilde fingered the fabric of his new linen suit in a light heather grey. The pants were cuffed at the bottoms, and a large lapel adorned the jacket that Q had buttoned only once, in the middle.
He’d paired the suit with a crisp white shirt and a white cravat tied around his neck, tucked into the neckline of the shirt. As they readied themselves for bed, she said, “You definitely could give Rhett Butler a run for his money in the looks department. Thanks for taking me to see the movie.”
“Hmm. I might ask some favors in return.” He pulled her into the bed beside him.
***
Hilde was still smiling the next day as she arrived at her office. She looked at her schedule to see she had a meeting with one of her biggest clients that morning. His industrial company produced lubricants and filters for machinery.
Herr Becker arrived, worrying his fingers and fidgeting on the seat she offered him. This was not his usual behavior.
“Herr Becker, thanks for coming. It’s been a long time, and I wanted to go over those statistics with you. The number of occupational accidents in your Berlin factory has soared recently.”
“Frau Quedlin.” The sturdy man in his fifties looked at her like a schoolboy caught in mischief and folded his hands. “We have already implemented measures to decrease the number, if this is what worries you.”
Hilde looked straight into his brown eyes, and Herr Becker evaded her glance. “I’m sure you did. But what strikes me as unusual is that our insurance company settles only a fraction of those accidents. Are you not satisfied with us anymore?”
Herr Becker lowered his head. “No, it’s not that.” His voice fell to a whisper. “The Berlin factory has been assigned one thousand new workers.”
Hilde smiled, pleased for his growing success. “Congratulations. That’s excellent news.” When the man’s face fell, and his eyes took on a pained expression, she lowered her voice and leaned closer. “It isn’t good news?”
“Not really.” He leaned over the desk and whispered, “They’re Czech workers.”
She still didn’t understand. “And…?”
Herr Becker sighed. “Workers displaced from the occupied territories forced to work for the Reich.”
Hilde gasped. “You don’t mean…?”
He sighed again, misery flashing across his face. “No. Look. I’d rather employ people working out of free will, but I don’t have much choice. The authorities have raised my production quota, and without those Czech workers, I cannot reach it. There’s just no way to find one thousand workers on the market.” The man leaned back, intently studying the tip of his shoes.
Hilde took a few moments to process his words. It didn’t make sense. “I understand why your occupational accidents have gone up, but why did the claims go down at the same time?”
Herr Becker coughed. “Because we don’t insure them. They’re considered second class workers and get none of the benefits our own employees do.” He was talking himself into a rage, and Hilde was glad that the colleague she shared the office with had called in sick for the day.
“Their working conditions are horrible. They get less payment and have to work longer hours. They have to do all the dangerous and dirty work, sometimes without the necessary instructions or protective gear. They live in camps. And the Reichsarbeitsamt requires me to give a weekly report on their performance and behavior. Anyone found lacking faces severe sanctions.”
The blood left Hilde’s face, and she felt a slight dizziness. “Sanctions?”
“Yes. The work office even provided me with special supervisors for them, and more than once, I saw one of the supervisors mistreating the workers. But my hands are bound. The only thing I can do is forbid punishment at the factory because of the implications for the general work safety. But what happens at the camp, I don’t know. Some don’t come back the next day.”
Hilde stopped breathing altogether.
“If I don’t reach the production quota, someone else will,” Herr Becker added in a defeated voice.
Just then, her boss entered the room. Herr Becker jumped up and greeted the newcomer, “Heil Hitler.”
“Herr Becker, I was told you were coming in today. How are those new workers doing?”
The despondency and complaints of a few moments ago changed before her eyes and Herr Becker answered with a loud and cheerful voice. “Having those workers has been a great addition to the cause. I can’t thank the government enough for seeing the need and taking such prudent actions to help my company perform the best it can for the Reich.”
“That is good to hear.” Her boss glanced over at Hilde, and she quickly ducked her head. “Is Frau Quedlin taking care of your needs?”
Herr Becker readily came to her aide. “Yes, sir, she is an excellent representative of the company. Unfortunately, for your company, we aren’t required to insure the new workers.”
“I know. Don’t worry about that. If you need anything else from us, don’t be afraid to let Frau Quedlin know. We all need to do our best for the Reich. Have a good day.” Hilde watched her boss leave the office and then bid her goodbyes to Herr Becker.
She probably should have been shocked, but everyone kowtowed to the Nazi ideals when pressed. Including myself. While she never openly praised the government, she had long ago stopped saying anything negative in regards to the Nazis, Third Reich, and Hitler.
Like everyone here, she just wanted to survive.
Chapter 16
Denied.
Q stared down at the paper in his hands…his hopes and dreams burning to ashes. A letter from the United States Embassy with the lapidary message that his and Hilde’s number hadn’t been drawn in the green card lottery. But they were encouraged to apply again next year.
One year?
That seemed like an eternity given the current conditions. Hilde was staring at him, and he cleared his throat before re-reading the letter to her. He wasn’t fooled by her attempt to put on a brave face. The disappointment was too obvious.
“Well, it looks like we won’t be travelling to America this summer. Nor will we make a permanent move anytime soon.”
Hilde’s eyes welled with tears as she nodded and he took her hand in
his. “Maybe we should take another trip to Italy?”
“Yes, that would be something. See the places we didn’t on our honeymoon.” Hilde leaned against his back, looping her arms around him, and he knew she longed for the blissful time they’d spent away from Germany.
“I’ll request the travel visa tomorrow. I guess I need to write Fanny and let her know we won’t be visiting this year after all.” Then he stood and headed for his office to grab pen and paper.
It took him a few minutes to tamp down his disappointment before he sat down to write his cousin a letter.
Dearest Fanny,
I hope this letter finds you and your family in good health and spirits. I’m writing to bring you the unpleasant news that Hilde and I won’t be visiting you this summer after all.
Fate has prevented us from taking the easy way out, as we did not get chosen in the lottery to receive green cards. I have to confess that Hilde and I were looking forward to the opportunity of fleeing to the comfortable security of America, but that is not to be at this time.
No, the powers that be have different plans for us. May I ask that you keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we continue to live out our lives here in the midst of this turmoil?
Your cousin,
Q
He placed the letter in an envelope and then let Hilde know he was going to walk down and place it in the post. His mind was slowly adjusting to the reality of his future, and by the time he returned to their apartment, he had a new resolve.
His convictions to destroy the Nazi regime had weakened as he’d given over to the hope of leaving this fight to others, but now he found a new strength and resolve burning in his chest. If it’s my fate to stay here, then I will fight back however I can.
“Hilde?” he called to her, watching as she came from the kitchen with a questioning look on her face.
“Q?”
“I’ve made a decision. I’m convinced that we’re meant to stay here and do all in our power to destroy this regime from the inside.”
Unyielding: Love and Resistance in WW2 Germany (World War II Trilogy) Page 8