Delphi Collected Works of Marie Corelli (Illustrated) (Delphi Series Eight Book 22)
Page 370
“Meanwhile” — I muttered to myself— “I will say nothing, ... not even to Lucio. He would only smile, ... and I should hate him! ...”
I broke off, wondering at this. For was it possible I should ever hate him? Surely not!
That night by way of a change, I slept in a hammock on deck, hoping to dispel midnight illusions by resting in the open air. But my sufferings were only intensified. I woke as usual, ... to see, not only Sibyl, but also to my deadly fear, the Three Phantoms that had appeared to me in my room in London on the evening of Viscount Lynton’s suicide. There they were, — the same, the very same! — only this time all their livid faces were lifted and turned towards me, and though their lips never moved, the word ‘Misery!’ seemed uttered, for I heard it tolling like a funeral bell on the air and across the sea! ... And Sibyl, with her face of death in the coils of a silent flame, ... Sibyl smiled at me! —— a smile of torture and remorse! ... God! — I could endure it no longer! Leaping from my hammock, I ran towards the vessel’s edge, ... one plunge into the cool waves, ... ha! — there stood Amiel, with his impenetrable dark face and ferret eyes!
“Can I assist you sir?” he inquired deferentially.
I stared at him, — then burst into a laugh.
“Assist me? Why no! — you can do nothing. I want rest, ... and I cannot sleep here, ... the air is too close and sulphureous, —— the very stars are burning hot! ...” I paused, — he regarded me with his usual gravely derisive expression. “I am going down to my cabin” — I continued, trying to speak more calmly — — “I shall be alone there ... perhaps!” Again I laughed wildly and involuntarily, and staggered away from him down the deck-stairs, afraid to look back lest I should see those Three Figures of fate following me.
Once safe in my cabin I shut to the door violently, and in feverish haste, seized my case of pistols. I took out one and loaded it. My heart was beating furiously, — I kept my eyes fixed on the ground, lest they should encounter the dead eyes of Sibyl.
“One click of the trigger—” I whispered— “and all is over! I shall be at peace, — senseless, — sightless and painless. Horrors can no longer haunt me, ... I shall sleep!”
I raised the weapon steadily to my right temple, ... when suddenly my cabin-door opened, and Lucio looked in.
456”Pardon me!” he said, as he observed my attitude— “I had no idea you were busy! I will go away. I would not disturb you for the world!”
His smile had something fiendish in its fine mockery; — moved with a quick revulsion of feeling I turned the pistol downwards and held its muzzle firmly against the table near me.
“You say that!” I exclaimed in acute anguish,— “you say it — seeing me thus! I thought you were my friend!”
He looked full at me, ... his eyes grew large and luminous with a splendour of scorn, passion and sorrow intermingled.
“Did you?” and again the terrific smile lit up his pale features,— “You were mistaken! I am your Enemy!”
A dreadful silence followed. Something lurid and unearthly in his expression appalled me, ... I trembled and grew cold with fear. Mechanically I replaced the pistol in its case, —— then I gazed up at him with a vacant wonder and wild piteousness, seeing that his dark and frowning figure seemed to increase in stature, towering above me like the gigantic shadow of a storm-cloud! My blood froze with an unnameable sickening terror, ... then, thick darkness veiled my sight, and I dropped down senseless!
XL
Thunder and wild tumult, — the glare of lightning, — the shattering roar of great waves leaping mountains high and hissing asunder in mid-air, — to this fierce riot of savage elements let loose in a whirling boisterous dance of death, I woke at last with a convulsive shock. Staggering to my feet I stood in the black obscurity of my cabin, trying to rally my scattered forces, — the electric lamps were extinguished, and the lightning alone illumined the sepulchral darkness. Frantic shoutings echoed above me on deck, — fiend-like yells that sounded now like triumph, now like despair, and again like menace, — the yacht leaped to and fro like a hunted stag amid the furious billows, and every frightful crash of thunder threatened, as it seemed, to split her in twain. The wind howled like a devil in torment, — it screamed and moaned and sobbed as though endowed with a sentient body that suffered acutest agony, — anon it rushed downwards with an angry swoop as of wide-flapping wings, and at each raging gust I thought the vessel must surely founder. Forgetting everything but immediate personal danger, I tried to open my door. It was locked outside! — I was a prisoner! My indignation at this discovery exceeded every other feeling, and beating with both hands on the wooden panels, I called, I shouted, I threatened, I swore, —— all in vain! Thrown down twice by the topsy-turvey lurching of the yacht, I still kept up a desperate hammering and calling, striving to raise my voice above the distracting pandemonium of noise that seemed to possess the ship from end to end, but all to no purpose, — and finally, hoarse and exhausted, I stopped and leaned against the unyielding door to recover breath and strength. The storm appeared to be increasing in force and clamour, — the lightning was well-nigh incessant, and the clattering thunder followed each flash so instantaneously as to leave no doubt but that it was immediately above us. I listened, — and presently heard a frenzied cry —
“Breakers ahead!” This was followed by peals of discordant laughter. Terrified, I strained my ears for every sound, — and all at once some-one spoke to me quite closely, as though the very darkness around me had found a tongue.
“Breakers ahead! Throughout the world, storm and danger and doom! Doom and Death! — but afterwards — Life!”
A certain intonation in these words filled me with such frantic horror that I fell on my knees in abject misery, and almost prayed to the God I had through all my life disbelieved in and denied. But I was too mad with fear to find words; — the dense blackness, — the horrid uproar of the wind and sea, — the infuriated and confused shouting, — all this was to my mind as though hell itself had broken loose, and I could only kneel dumbly and tremble. Suddenly a swirling sound as of an approaching monstrous whirlwind made itself heard above all the rest of the din, — a sound that gradually resolved itself into a howling chorus of thousands of voices sweeping along on the gusty blast, —— fierce cries were mingled with the jarring thunder, and I leapt erect as I caught the words of the clangorous shout —
“Ave Sathanas! Ave!”
Rigidly upright, with limbs stiffening for sheer terror, I stood listening, — the waves seemed to roar “Ave Sathanas!” — the wind shrieked it to the thunder, — the lightning wrote it in a snaky line of fire on the darkness “Ave Sathanas!” My brain swam round and grew full to bursting, — I was going mad, — raving mad surely! — or why should I thus distinctly hear such unmeaning sounds as these? With a sudden access of superhuman force I threw the whole weight of my body against the door of my cabin in a delirious effort to break it open, — it yielded slightly, — and I prepared myself for another rush and similar attempt, — when all at once it was flung widely back, admitting a stream of pale light, and Lucio, wrapped in heavy shrouding garments, confronted me.
“Follow me, Geoffrey Tempest,—” he said in low clear tones— “Your time has come!”
As he spoke, all self-possession deserted me, — the terrors of the storm, and now the terror of his presence, overwhelmed my strength, and I stretched out my hands to him appealingly, unknowing what I did or said.
“For God’s sake ...!” I began wildly.
He silenced me by an imperious gesture.
“Spare me your prayers! For God’s sake, for your own sake, and for mine! Follow!”
He moved before me like a black phantom in the pale strange light surrounding him, — and I, dazzled, dazed and terror-stricken, trod in his steps closely, moved, as it seemed by some volition not my own, till I found myself alone with him in the saloon of the yacht, with the waves hissing up against the windows like live snakes ready to sting. Trembling
and scarcely able to stand I sank on a chair, — he turned round and looked at me for a moment meditatively. Then he threw open one of the windows, — a huge wave dashed in and scattered its bitter salt spray upon me where I sat, — but I heeded nothing, — my agonised looks were fixed on Him, — the Being I had so long made the companion of my days. Raising his hand with a gesture of authority he said —
“Back, ye devils of the sea and wind! — ye which are not God’s elements but My servants, the unrepenting souls of men! Lost in the waves, or whirled in the hurricane, whichever ye have made your destiny, get hence and cease your clamour! This hour is Mine!”
Panic-stricken I heard, — aghast I saw the great billows that had shouldered up in myriads against the vessel, sink suddenly, — the yelling wind dropped, silenced, — the yacht glided along with a smooth even motion as though on a tranquil inland lake, — and almost before I could realize it, the light of the full moon beamed forth brilliantly and fell in a broad stream across the floor of the saloon. But in the very cessation of the storm the words “Ave Sathanas!” trembled as it were upwards to my ears from the underworld of the sea, and died away in distance like a parting echo of thunder. Then Lucio faced me, — with what a countenance of sublime and awful beauty!
“Do you know Me now, man whom my millions of dross have made wretched? — or do you need me to tell you Who I am?”
My lips moved, — but I could not speak; the dim and dreadful thought that was dawning on my mind seemed as yet too frenzied, too outside the boundaries of material sense for mortal utterance.
“Be dumb, — be motionless! — but hear and feel!” he continued— “By the supreme power of God, — for there is no other power in any world or any heaven, — I control and command you at this moment, your own will being set aside for once as naught! I choose you as one out of millions to learn in this life the lesson that all must learn hereafter; — let every faculty of your intelligence be ready to receive that which I shall impart, — and teach it to your fellow-men if you have a conscience as you have a Soul!”
Again I strove to speak, — he seemed so human, — so much my friend still, though he had declared himself my Enemy, —— and yet ... what was that lambent radiance encircling his brows? — that burning glory steadily deepening and flashing from his eyes?
“You are one of the world’s ‘fortunate’ men,—” he went on, surveying me straightly and pitilessly— “So at least this world judges you, because you can buy its good-will. But the Forces that govern all worlds, do not judge you by such a standard, — you cannot buy their good-will, not though all the Churches should offer to sell it you! They regard you as you are, stripped soul-naked, — not as you seem! They behold in you a shameless egoist, persistently engaged in defacing their divine Image of Immortality, — and for that sin there is no excuse and no escape but Punishment. Whosoever prefers Self to God, and in the arrogance of that Self, presumes to doubt and deny God, invites another Power to compass his destinies, — the power of Evil, made evil and kept evil by the disobedience and wickedness of Man alone, — that power whom mortals call Satan, Prince of Darkness, — but whom once the angels knew as Lucifer, Prince of Light!” ... He broke off, — paused, — and his flaming regard fell full upon me. “Do you know Me, ... now?”
I sat a rigid figure of fear, dumbly staring, ... was this man, for he seemed man, mad that he should thus hint at a thing too wild and terrible for speech?
“If you do not know Me, — if you do not feel in your convicted soul that you are aware of Me, — it is because you will not know! Thus do I come upon men, when they rejoice in their wilful self-blindness and vanity! — thus do I become their constant companion, humouring them in such vices as they best love! — thus do I take on the shape that pleases them, and fit myself to their humours! They make me what I am; — they mould my very form to the fashion of their flitting time. Through all their changing and repeating eras, they have found strange names and titles for me, — and their creeds and churches have made a monster of me, — as though imagination could compass any worse monster than the Devil in Man!”
Frozen and mute I heard, ... the dead silence, and his resonant voice vibrating through it, seemed more terrific than the wildest storm.
“You, — God’s work, — endowed as every conscious atom of His creation is endowed, — with the infinite germ of immortality; — you, absorbed in the gathering together of such perishable trash as you conceive good for yourself on this planet, — you dare, in the puny reach of your mortal intelligence to dispute and question the everlasting things invisible! You, by the Creator’s will, are permitted to see the Natural Universe, — but in mercy to you, the veil is drawn across the Super-natural! For such things as exist there, would break your puny earth-brain as a frail shell is broken by a passing wheel, — and because you cannot see, you doubt! You doubt not only the surpassing Love and Wisdom that keeps you in ignorance till you shall be strong enough to bear full knowledge, but you doubt the very fact of such another universe itself. Arrogant fool! — your hours are counted by Super-natural time! — your days are compassed by Super-natural law! — your every thought, word, deed and look must go to make up the essence and shape of your being in Super-natural life hereafter! — and what you have been in your Soul here, must and shall be the aspect of your Soul there! That law knows no changing!”
The light about his face deepened, — he went on in clear accents that vibrated with the strangest music.
“Men make their own choice and form their own futures,” he said— “And never let them dare to say they are not free to choose! From the uttermost reaches of high Heaven the Spirit of God descended to them as Man, — from the uttermost depths of lowest Hell, I, the Spirit of Rebellion, come, — equally as Man! But the God-in-Man was rejected and slain, — I, the Devil-in-Man live on, forever accepted and adored! Man’s choice this is — not God’s or mine! Were this self-seeking human race once to reject me utterly, I should exist no more as I am, — nor would they exist who are with me. Listen, while I trace your career! — it is a copy of the lives of many men; — and judge how little the powers of Heaven can have to do with you! — how much the powers of Hell!”
I shuddered involuntarily; — dimly I began to realize the awful nature of this unearthly interview.
“You, Geoffrey Tempest, are a man in whom a Thought of God was once implanted, — that subtle fire or note of music out of heaven called Genius. So great a gift is rarely bestowed on any mortal, — and woe betide him, who having received it, holds it as of mere personal value, to be used for Self and not for God! Divine laws moved you gently in the right path of study, — the path of suffering, of disappointment, of self-denial and poverty, — for only by these things is humanity made noble and trained in the ways of perfection. Through pain and enduring labour the soul is armed for battle, and strengthened for conquest. For it is more difficult to bear a victory well, than to endure many buffetings of war! But you, — you resented Heaven’s good-will towards you, — the Valley of Humiliation suited you not at all. Poverty maddened you, — starvation sickened you. Yet poverty is better than arrogant wealth, — and starvation is healthier than self-indulgence! You could not wait, — your own troubles seemed to you enormous, — your own efforts laudable and marvellous, — the troubles and efforts of others were nothing to you; — you were ready to curse God and die. Compassionating yourself, admiring yourself and none other, with a heart full of bitterness, and a mouth full of cursing, you were eager to make quick havoc of both your genius and your soul. For this cause, your millions of money came —— and, — so did I!”
Standing now full height he confronted me, — his eyes were less brilliant, but, they reflected in their dark splendour a passionate scorn and sorrow.
“O fool! — in my very coming I warned you! — on the very day we met I told you I was not what I seemed! God’s elements crashed a menace when we made our compact of friendship! And I, — when I saw the faint last struggle of the not qu
ite torpid soul in you to resist and distrust me, did I not urge you to let that better instinct have its way? You, — jester with the Supernatural! — you, — base scoffer at Christ! A thousand hints have been given you, — a thousand chances of doing such good as must have forced me to leave you, — as would have brought me a welcome respite from sorrow, — a moment’s cessation of torture!”