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Fallen Fourth Down (Fallen Crest #4)

Page 21

by Tijan


  She murmured, “Am I supposed to worry about her? Is she going to try something else? Logan said she’s crazy.”

  “She was a friend to me when I didn’t like the female gender. I felt like they wanted to use me, use Logan, use my dad. Marissa was a friend that showed me not all girls want to use someone for something. I haven’t wanted to deal with her, with this crush she has on me, because I cared about her.”

  Sam frowned.

  I held my hand up, seeing she was going to say something. I said softly, “I don’t care about her now. I’m not friends with her. I hate thinking that last night was a set-up, that somehow she worked everything so she was brought here, but I can’t rule out that possibility.”

  “Have you talked to her?” She looked back down at her lap. Her hand started to pick at imaginary lint on her pants. She did that when she was nervous or couldn’t deal with the pain inside her.

  “No.” I waited a beat. “Do you want me to?” Marissa was nothing to me, but she kept popping up, and she was becoming a problem. I would do what Sam wanted. This wasn’t about me or Marissa’s feelings. This was about what Sam wanted me to do. It was all about how to make her my first priority, remember that she was my first priority. When she didn’t answer, I prodded, “Sam?”

  “I don’t know what to say. I hate that she’s here. I trust you, but I don’t trust her.” She cringed and pressed her fingers to her forehead, rubbing at a headache. “She just won’t go away. Why won’t she go away? I don’t know what to think about last night. She came to that lunch, then she’s in your hallway, and you’re apologizing for not dealing with that.”

  Hearing the misery in her voice sealed it for me. Marissa was done. Sam would never be exposed to her again, and it was my job to make sure it didn’t happen. If I had to, I would make Marissa hate me. Maybe then she’d stay away.

  I knelt in front of her. My hands went to her legs, felt how stiff they were, and I cursed inside. “Hey.”

  She gazed down at me. Raw hurt was in there. I helped put it there. I couldn’t talk for a moment, but said, “I’m sorry. I’ll make sure she goes away. I promise.”

  The relief was evident. Her head bobbed up and down in a weak nod. A different look came across her features, and she stiffened. Her shoulders lifted, staying there. “I have to tell you something.”

  Logan told me about the douchebag. He gave me warning that another guy was sniffing around Sam, but that was it. As soon as Logan said that to me, I knew it was the real reason Sam was here. She hated keeping secrets, so this must’ve been eating away at her. I nodded. “Go ahead.”

  “It’s about that guy I told you about, the guy who took my virginity.”

  My insides tensed. Even her saying that, made me want to hunt him down and punch him. I didn't know much about the guy she had lost her virginity to, but I wasn’t dumb. I knew she regretted it. A part of me relaxed at the same time, though. The usual condemnation that she had whenever she had spoken about him wasn’t there. I still heard the nervousness, and that made me even more wary.

  Trying to sound casual, I murmured, “Yeah?”

  “He’s here. I mean, he’s in Fallen Crest.”

  Fucker.

  Looking back to her lap, she rushed out, “His name is Jackson; he’s Jeff’s cousin. I cheated on Jeff with him, once, a few months before we broke up. I never talked to him after that, but he recently moved to Fallen Crest. His parents are going through a divorce. He’s going to school at FCA. He’s,” her tone softened, more hesitant, “he’s a big football star.”

  “Jackson?” What was her ex’s last name?

  “Jackson Sallaway.”

  The name registered. “He plays tight-end? He was at Cequate High School?” Shit. He was good.

  “There’s nothing there.”

  I felt her eyes on me, and for once, I was the one not looking at her. Yeah, she was right. There wasn’t anything there because if there had been, that guy would be fucked. I shook my head, cursing to myself. Even if I wanted to kick his ass, I wouldn’t have. Sallaway’s reputation was a good one. He was a decent guy. He didn’t mess with other guys’ girls, and he wasn’t cocky.

  I gritted my teeth. “He’s good-looking? His nickname is Pretty.”

  She laughed, but it stopped immediately on a high-pitched tone. “Yeah.”

  I groaned. “That makes it worse.”

  “He’s not you.”

  A hollow laugh came from me. “I’m aware. He’s there and I’m here.”

  She stood, a determined glint in her eyes as she approached me. Her chin was set. I had to laugh. Sam was going to make me feel better. She was going to reassure me, whisper how much she loved me, and tell me how great of a guy I was. I already knew these things. I didn’t need her to remind me because in the end, she’d still be leaving. He’d be there and I’d remain here. My stomach was already in knots, but I lifted my head and waited for her to stand in front of me. As she did, my hands went to her hips. Hers cupped my face and she whispered, her eyes so goddamn loving, “No one will ever be you. All roads lead to you, Mason. No one else matters because I’m always going towards you.”

  I nodded, feeling the graze from her fingers over my skin. “I know.” I tugged her onto my lap, and as she was going to sit sideways, I lifted her and pulled her legs so she was straddling me instead. I could feel her heart racing and the tension in her body. She was trying to reassure me, but I could tell this was scaring the shit out of her.

  Running my hand up her back, slipping it under her shirt, I watched her. This was one of my favorite moments, when I would touch her and could watch her reaction. Her eyelids dropped, and she relaxed. I slid my hand further up her back, slipping it under her bra, and pulling it towards her front, under her arm. Feeling her breast, it was warm and solid. I cupped it, my thumb rubbing over the nipple. As I did, Sam squirmed like she always does. Her legs surged against mine, pushing into me, and she leaned forward into my hand. Her neck tilted to the side, as if granting me access there.

  I leaned forward and kissed her neck. We had thirty minutes. I was going to enjoy every minute of it and make sure Jackson Sallaway was a very distant memory for her.

  *

  SAMANTHA

  “I don’t think Mason likes me.”

  We were in the women’s bathroom when Kris shared that with me.

  Mason had made love to me before we left for the restaurant. He’d been possessive and a little rough, but I enjoyed it. Even thinking about it brought back a rush of memories. I was growing heated and ducked my head, hoping Kris hadn’t witnessed my red face.

  She sighed. “Oh my god. It’s true, isn’t it?”

  I looked up. She stopped fixing her hair and turned, biting her lip and wringing her hands together. Her puppy dog-like eyes were fixed on mine, and it was obvious that her feelings were hurt. She added, “I haven’t done anything wrong. I don’t think. And I always say hi to him. I try to talk to him, but he just looks at me and walks away or says something to someone else, like I haven’t even spoken. I have no idea what I’ve done wrong.”

  Oh boy. “Um.” I had no idea what to say. Mason was an ass at times. “Have you talked to Logan about it?”

  She nodded. “Yeah, but he doesn’t say much. He changes the subject or leaves like Mason does.” A soft groan came from her. “We’ve been having problems. I’m sure you’ve noticed. I mean, everyone has. I don’t even know how to talk to Logan sometimes.”

  “The last girlfriend Logan had really hurt him. She came onto Mason one night, and he might be standoffish to you because he doesn’t want the same thing to happen again.”

  Her eyes lit up with hope. “You think that’s it?”

  No, but I wasn’t going to tell her that. If Mason had one inkling she might come onto him, he would share that tidbit with Logan immediately. The only redeeming fact I could think was that Mason wasn’t being mean. He just wanted nothing to do with her. I smiled at her. “It’s just the four of us tonight, so se
e how the rest of the evening goes?”

  “Yeah, you’re right.” She nodded to herself and turned for the door, squaring her shoulders back like she was going into battle. “Let’s do this.” A determined expression came over her. Her eyebrows furrowed, her lips pressed together, and she raised her chin up. She was on a mission.

  As we walked back to the table, I caught a glimpse of Mason and Logan with their heads together. I could see the intensity in their expressions from across the restaurant. When we got closer, they didn’t stop their conversation. Logan was saying, “I don’t agree with you. We should call Nate tonight, go over there, and deal with this. I’m coming to this same school next year. I don’t want to come in the middle of a battle. It’s fucked up that you guys haven’t squashed this.”

  Mason flashed him a grin and rubbed my shoulder when I sat next to him. He said to his brother, “We can’t go and bomb their cars. These guys don’t fight like that. The situation isn’t a situation. And I will squash this with Nate, for the Marissa incident.”

  “That’s bullshit.”

  Mason’s eyes narrowed. “What’s up your ass? You’ve been in a mood since you showed up.”

  “Nothing.” Logan’s scowl deepened, and he moved his chair back. “I have to go to the bathroom.”

  Kris spoke up, “He’s mad at me. We had a fight on the way here.”

  Mason and I shared a look. I had no idea what to say to that.

  Mason nodded. “Okay.”

  Her forehead wrinkled and her lips were pressed together, like she couldn’t decide something. Then she nodded to herself and rested her hands on the table. She looked right at Mason. “Why don’t you like me?”

  Oh, shit.

  Mason lounged back in his chair. His hand had been rubbing my shoulder, but stopped. “What?” He looked at me.

  I told him, “She’s not talking to me.”

  He scowled, but it was gone instantly. “Excuse me?”

  Kris’s throat moved up and down as she swallowed. Her hand lifted from her lap, shaking, and she laid it down on the table, spreading her fingers wide as if she could calm herself that way. “I have not done anything to you. I’ve been polite and even friendly, but you act as if I’m not here. I would like to know why you don’t like me.” She paused a beat. “Please. Is this why Logan and I are having problems? Do I need your approval to date your brother?”

  “You already are dating.”

  “I meant for the next level, where we’re more serious.”

  He glanced at me. I shrugged. This was on him to handle. He turned back and settled all of the weight of his gaze on her. I had been on the receiving end from one of those looks from him, before I knew he loved me. When she grasped onto the tablecloth and her hands fell into her lap with a thud, I could sympathize with her.

  He said, “I can give you my honest answer, but I will warn you. You won’t like it, and it will hurt your feelings.” He waited before adding, “Do you still want my answer?”

  “Yes.” She raised that tiny chin again. “I do.” I could see fear lurking in the depths of her eyes. Pain flashed in there as well, but it was moved aside, and her shoulders rolled back once again.

  “I don’t dislike you. I don’t like you either. I’m sorry if I come across as rude. I don’t intend to be, but I just don’t think about you.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You don’t matter to me.”

  She sucked in her breath, and the blood drained from her face.

  Mason added, “Your relationship with Logan won’t last. It’s only a matter of time before he decides to dump you and you know that. I can see it in you. I don’t know why you’re kidding yourself. You’re just lying to yourself and the longer you do, the more you’re allowing yourself to be hurt by him.”

  “You have no idea—” she started, snarling at him.

  He shook his head, stopping her. He softened his tone. “I’m not saying this to hurt you. I am sorry if that's what you think, but I know my brother.”

  She began to shake her head as tears started to fall. “You don’t know this. You can’t…” Her voice trailed off and doubt clouded over her face. Her head dropped until her chin tucked against her chest. From my seat at the table, I could see tears dripping onto her hands. She never brushed them away as they fell steadily.

  Mason glanced at me, a small frown on his face. He said, “I know you love my brother, but he doesn’t love you.”

  Her shoulders lifted, and she inhaled a sobbing breath.

  He added, “I think you know that too.”

  “Excuse me,” she choked out and rushed from the table.

  “Kris—”

  Mason grabbed my hand and held me back. “Don’t.”

  “You broke her, Mason. Let me go after her.”

  “No. Let her go. It’s the best thing for her.”

  “She’s hurting—”

  “Yes, she is, but if you go after her, you’ll end up saying something to give her false hope, whether you mean to or not. Logan doesn’t love her. You know that. I know that. Logan knows it, and she does too. Let her deal with this on her own. She’ll be stronger because of it.”

  I sat back down. Maybe he was right.

  Logan came back at that moment. He scanned the table. “Where’s Kris?”

  Mason never faltered. He never looked away. He spoke clearly, “She asked me why I didn’t like her.”

  Logan froze. “You didn’t. Oh, god. Mase, tell me you didn’t.”

  “So I told her.”

  “Oh my god.” Logan’s hand flew up, and he pressed his palm to his forehead. “For real? Why? Shit, Mason. Why? That’s not on you to tell her.” He shook his head and raked his hand through his hair. “Look, I have to find Kris and see if I can do something to make this better.”

  When he rushed from the restaurant, an alien feeling settled over me. This was off; Logan’s reaction wasn’t normal. I turned to Mason, still stunned at what had happened. “You basically ended his relationship, and he wasn’t even mad at you.” I shook my head. “That’s not normal. Why didn’t he get mad? Why didn’t he do anything?”

  “He went after her.”

  “To make it better. That’s what he said, but…” I looked towards the front of the restaurant where Logan had gone, but didn't see him. I blinked, still in shock. “Why did you answer her like that?”

  We were attracting attention. There hadn’t been any raised voices or angry movements, but I felt the audience growing. Head after head had turned in our direction. Mason saw them too and cursed. He gestured to the door with his head. “Can we finish this outside?”

  As I followed him, a foreboding sensation grew in me. When he led me down the street, then around a corner for more privacy, almost all of me had stopped feeling. I said again, “Why did you answer her like that?”

  “Because she asked me.”

  “Why didn’t you lie to her? You knew it would hurt her.”

  “Because she wanted to know the truth.”

  It sounded so simple coming from him, but I couldn’t get over the surreal feeling of this situation. “You broke them up. Why did you do that? You just caused pain for them.”

  His eyes narrowed, and he shook his head. He looked puzzled. “Because it’s the truth, Sam. Logan doesn’t love her. She knows that, and she asked me because it was time for her to hear it. You don’t seek out an answer unless you actually want to hear it. She’s not dumb. She knew what she was going to get when she asked.”

  “You hurt them, though.” I couldn’t get past that. A tightness had settled in my chest, burrowing deeper and deeper. “If you hadn’t said anything, they’d be still together. She wouldn’t have left crying. Logan wouldn’t have chased after her. I mean, even if they get back together, this will still be between them.”

  “He doesn’t love her.” Mason shook his head, slowly, as he gazed at me. “Why is this bothering you so much?”

  A bitter laugh gurgled up from my throat.
Why was this bothering me? “You could’ve held your words and no one would’ve gotten hurt. That relationship is done, but if you’d just kept quiet, everything would’ve been fine.”

  “Sam.” He started for me.

  I moved away. My voice rose. “I mean, this is their relationship. That’s his girlfriend. It’s gone because of a few words from you; you destroyed them.”

  Tate’s voice haunted me. “Logan’s in love with you.” I closed my eyes as that thought screamed in my head. I could destroy everything. I could destroy us.

  “Sam.” Mason was shaking his head as he took another step towards me. Concern flashed in his eyes. “She loves him and he doesn’t return the feeling. That’s not fair to her to remain in that relationship. She asked me for a reason. She wanted to know the truth, and I’m guessing that she didn’t have the heart to hear it from him.”

  “But how do you know?”

  “I’ve known since the beginning.”

  I sucked in my breath. “Have you guys talked about it? I mean, what other stuff do you talk about? How do you even have those conversations with each other?”

  “I know Logan. I know when he’s in love, and I know when he’s using a girl for a distraction.”

  Oh god. My heart skipped a beat. I shook my head. This was my nightmare coming true. The real truth was right there. I felt it lingering beside us, and he was so close to it. One step and he’d stumble on it, and he’d know. I was holding my tears back. The truth would be out.

  I shook my head. I couldn’t lose him. I couldn’t lose Logan either. “Mason,” I whispered, my voice hoarse. It was there, on the tip of my tongue. But I stopped myself. I couldn’t lose him.

  “Sam?”

  “Nothing.”

  His shoulders lifted in a silent breath and I turned away. His hand touched my arm, and I turned into him at the gentle touch. He pulled me in, his arm moving around me, his other smoothing back my hair, falling to cup the side of my face. His thumb moved back and forth on my cheek in a comforting motion, and he pressed a soft kiss to my forehead. His lips brushing my skin and his breath warming me, he whispered, “I love you.”

 

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