REMEMBER JAMIE BAKER

by Kelly Oram

  “Jamie, please,” Ryan pleaded. “Something is wrong. This isn’t you. Let us help you.”

  My eyes scanned the group again and I shook my head. “You don’t want to help me. You want to use me. I can’t trust you. I’m sorry. I have to go…”

  As I backed up a step, Ryan whispered three words that made me freeze. “That’s not true, Jamie. I love you.” When I paused, Ryan shook his head. “I could never hurt you. You know I couldn’t. Somewhere deep inside, you know that.”

  My heart reacted, fighting against the urges in my head. I didn’t want to leave him. I needed to, though I didn’t understand why. But I didn’t want to. Tears of frustration burned my eyes. This was all too much. My head was a jumbled mess that was only getting worse by the second. “I don’t know anything.”

  My energy kicked up into high gear, reaching the point where my hair started whipping around my head and electricity crackled along my skin. I was full of inexplicable anxiety and seeing yellow, but I still caught the major’s small nod to Johnny G.

  The ACE team leader tried to subtly lift a tranq gun in my direction. Rational Jamie would have understood his actions, but I wasn’t feeling or thinking rationally at the moment. All I saw was a weapon. A threat. And I acted. “I don’t think so.”

  I had the gun out of his hands and smashed into an unusable ball of metal, and was back in my spot facing them in my standoff before Johnny G hit the ground. Which he did hard, because I’d disarmed his tranq gun and jabbed him in the neck with his own dart.

  “Anyone else want to try and take me out?” I growled. Before, I’d just been frustrated, but now I was pissed. I didn’t respond well to attacks of any kind, even if they were meant for my own protection.

  Ryan lifted his hands in surrender, and as he tried to talk me down from my temper tantrum, several of the ACEs used the distraction to fire tranquilizers at me.

  And this is why superreflexes rock.

  I heard the guns fire and was more than able to move faster than the darts. I not only dodged them: I caught them and made every man who’d fired at me join their team leader in dreamland. Their guns all ended up in tranq gun heaven, too.

  “Stop shooting at me!” I roared. “You guys are seriously starting to piss me off, and bad things happen when I get really angry.”

  “Calm down, Angel,” Major Wilks said. He, Ryan, Abiodun, Tex, and Eyes were the only men still standing. “We don’t want to hurt you. We just need to figure out what that man did to you.”

  “By shooting me with tranquilizers? I should roast you! You can forget about me working with you. I’m done. Out. You got that? I’m leaving. You guys are never going to see me again. And if you manage to track me down someday, good luck to you. This is your one pass. I won’t be so nice next time.”

  A small sting hit my neck. I knew what that meant; it meant I was the biggest idiot on the planet. It looked like I needed to add that word to my personality traits list after all. I couldn’t believe I’d been caught monologueing. Well, sort of. I’d been delivering threats instead of divulging evil plans, but, you know, still wasting time when I should have been running, so, same difference. Curse my freaking temper! At least Teddy wasn’t here to witness my stupidity. Ryan was, though, and as I gasped and blinked slowly, he gave me a sorrowful smile. “It’s going to be okay, babe. You’re just going to sleep it off.”

  “Sorry, Angel,” Tyson whispered as my head fogged over.

  I’d been so distracted I never heard him approach. I’d forgotten about him because I couldn’t see him, and when he popped back into sight right behind me, I reacted instinctively, blasting him with a full dose of electricity. It may have even been an actual lightning bolt, because I was more amped up than I’d ever been. I barely had time to watch him fly backward from the force of my blow before the lights went out and I joined the unconscious ACEs on the ground.

  . . . . .

  When I woke up, I figured I’d have a raging headache, but I felt surprisingly relaxed. I wasn’t locked in a cage or strapped to a gurney, either. I was lying on a beautiful sandy-white beach backed by a thick tropical rainforest, and I was looking at the most amazing crystal-clear ocean I’d ever seen. The sun was hot on my skin, and a slight breeze was keeping me just cool enough to feel absolutely perfect.

  I couldn’t remember the last time I felt so at peace. There wasn’t a soul on this beach with me except for the one person I’d want to share this moment with. I smiled, trying to decide what was more gorgeous: this private exotic beach, or my companion.

  Ryan lay sprawled next to me on a large blanket in a pair of swim shorts. He was propped up on his elbow, staring out at the waves as they crashed on the shore just a few yards in front of us. He seemed lost in thought, but a small smile played on his lips.

  Sucking in a huge breath of fresh ocean air, I pushed my body into a stretch and moaned with pleasure. The sound startled Ryan from his thoughts. When he grinned, my heart fluttered. “Feel better?” he asked.

  I didn’t question how we got here or why. I didn’t care. “So much better. Thank you for bringing me here.”

  “Me?” Ryan quirked a brow at me. “I’m not the one with superspeed.”

  “You know what I mean.” After rolling my eyes, I shook my head and let out a soft sigh. “Do you always know exactly what I need?”

  Ryan shook his head, chuckling. “Not always. Today was easy, though. A little peace and quiet always calms you down.”

  I lifted myself up onto my elbows and gazed out at the view around me. It was definitely peaceful and quiet, but I suspected that’s not what had calmed me down. Feeling bold, I told Ryan as much. “I don’t think it’s the place so much as the company.”

  Surprise flashed in Ryan’s eyes, but he quickly flashed me a cocky grin. “I thought I had the opposite effect on you.”

  To prove his point, he dragged a finger over my shoulder and down my arm. His soft touch on my sun-baked skin sent a chill through me. My heart started pounding in my chest and my breath quickened.

  Ryan only smiled in response to my physical reaction. There was no need for him to point out the obvious. He started trailing his finger along the strap of my swimsuit. It was a cute white one-piece with pink polka dots that had been sitting in my closet in the desert, untouched since the moment my memory began. I’d always loved it, but I’d never had occasion to wear it until now. It was questionably low-cut and only held in place by a thin strap that tied behind my neck. This was the strap Ryan was fiddling with. He was concentrating very hard on the thin material, as if he were contemplating untying the bow on the back of my neck. The thought thrilled me unlike anything ever had before.

  Ryan, guessing the direction of my thoughts, scooted closer to me, closing the small gap between us. His hands continued their heavenly torture, moving slowly over every part of exposed skin they could find. Well, I thought, if he can do it, so can I.

  Dozens of times I’d imagined what it would feel like to run my fingers up his rippled stomach, and finally I turned that fantasy to reality. Shyly, I reached out to feel his smooth skin and soft baby-fine blond hair. He sucked in a sharp breath when my fingers made contact. His hand clasped over mine, stilling my exploration of his body, and his eyes flashed to mine, searing me with heat. “Jamie,” he rasped, voice huskier than it had ever been.

  He brought my hand to his lips, and his eyes fell shut as he kissed me softly on my inner wrist. “I need you.”

  It was a desperate plea, an irresistible plea. I couldn’t deny him any more than I could deny I wanted him. I was still nervous. “I want to…but…I’ve never…”

  “I know, Sunshine.” He leaned forward, giving me a tender kiss. “We don’t have to, if you’re not ready…I just…”

  He took a deep breath and leaned back. The feeling of him pulling away was what drove me to grab his wrist and say, “I’m ready.”

  With a hard swallow, I lay back, placing myself in his care, never breaking eye contact. “Are you
sure?” he whispered.

  My body was sure, if nothing else, so I nodded again.

  Ryan needed no other prompt. “I love you, Jamielynn Baker. I always have, and always will.” He leaned over me, kissing me deeply. His body, warm and solid pressed against me, ignited a fire inside me that might just have been hot enough to melt the sand around us. I gasped…

  …and shot to a sitting position, in a bed, groggy from sleep and yet flushed from the heat coursing my body.

  “Jamie?”

  Ryan was there, but the beach was gone. He was back in his army green and my swimsuit was probably still tucked in my dresser in the desert safe house where it had always been. Though, the heat I’d been consumed with was lingering inside me. Placing the back of my hand to my cheek, I took a breath, shook myself, and rubbed my neck as I slowly released the air from my lungs. Man, it was hot in here.

  “Jamie? Are you okay?”

  Blinking in the dimly lit room, I looked at Ryan, perched in a chair beside the head of my bed—I was back in my room at ACE headquarters—and realized what had happened. “I dreamed!”

  I shook my head in awe. “It was a dream.” I flinched as the implications hit me full force. “Ryan! I had a dream!”

  Ryan flashed me a crooked grin. “A pretty hot one, from the looks of it.”

  I was so not responding to that.

  “Was it about me?”

  Or that.

  “Don’t you get it? I dreamed. I’ve never dreamed before. I couldn’t. That means the serum worked!”

  I thought about it again, still fascinated by what I’d experienced. I knew what dreams were, and Teddy had told me about some of his, but I’d never really been able to understand before. “It was so real. So vivid. It was like I was really there.”

  “With me?” Ryan asked again. “Where were we? What were we doing?”

  I glared at him to try to keep from blushing. Not sure it worked. “I never said it was about you.”

  Ryan’s grin doubled. “But it was, wasn’t it? I can tell. You’re all flushed. Come on, babe. Give me all the juicy details. You can’t have that kind of fun without me.”

  “Oh my gosh, would you shut up? I didn’t dream about you.”

  Lie. But he didn’t need to know about my dream; his head was big enough already.

  Ryan didn’t buy it, and countered with an excellent argument. “But what if it wasn’t just a dream? What if it was a memory?”

  “You think?” I gasped. My heart may have stopped from the excitement that surged through me.

  Ryan shrugged. “People have memories in dreams all the time.”

  He was right. I’d read all about amnesia, and there were many times when people’s memories started coming back in bits and pieces, often in their dreams. I was a special case, of course, but if my brain was healing and I was starting to get my memories back, it was possible. My dream could have really happened. I shivered at the thought. “Did we ever go to a beach?”

  “So it was about me. I knew it.”

  “No,” I said stubbornly, rolling my eyes when he smirked. “Fine. Maybe you were there. Did we ever go to a beach, or not?”

  Ryan rose from his chair, puffing out his chest like a proud peacock. “The beach, huh?”

  I was about to comment on his gigantic ego, but he moved from his chair onto my bed and leaned close—very close—causing my mouth to dry up before I could get the words out. “Were you wearing the pink polka dots?” he asked. “Because I love the pink polka dots. They’re so girly and cute. You never do cute except for that one swimsuit.”

  I may as well have been back in my dream the way my heart was pounding. He was just so close, pushing all of my senses into overdrive. He smelled so good, and I could feel heat rising off his body. I was practically shaking from the anticipation of his kiss. “So we did go to a beach?” I asked. My voice was shaky and barely above a whisper.

  His gaze zeroed in on my mouth. “A few times.”

  He captured me in a firm kiss that made my head swim. I broke it with a gasp, desperate to finish this conversation and confirm that my dream was a real memory. “Was it a beautiful, tropical one? Probably in Central or South America somewhere?”

  “Santa Cruz,” he said, stealing another kiss. “Northern California.”

  My heart sank a little. California wasn’t tropical. It couldn’t have been the same beach. But the swimsuit was right, so maybe only parts of the memory had been incorporated into the dream. “What did we normally do when we went there?”

  That was a dangerous question considering Ryan’s current mood, but I had to know. Ryan moved his mouth to my neck. His lips stretched into a smile against my skin, and a low chuckle vibrated in his chest. “What were we doing in your dream, babe?”

  I sucked in a breath. The dream was still so vivid in my mind. Pretty much what we were doing now, except more intense and with more skin.

  Ryan didn’t need to hear my thoughts to know what I was thinking. “Mmm. My kind of dream. I’m sorry I missed it. How far did we get?”

  He kissed me again, deep and sensual. I couldn’t help responding to him, and when I did, he pushed me back until I was lying on the bed with him mostly on top of me. He was completely gone now, lost down a single-track thought path that led to only one place. Just like in the dream my body was ready to follow him, but my head and heart weren’t there yet. My awake self had more restraint than my subconscious. “Ryan, wait. I’m sorry. Please stop.”

  After stealing one last kiss, Ryan rolled onto his back with a groan. “Sorry. I know you’re the queen of taking things slow. I get it. I respect it. I’m just not as good at it.”

  He stretched his long body and then pulled me into his arms, as if he intended to lie there and snuggle for the next few hours…or at least until he calmed down some. He squeezed me tight and let out a long breath. “It feels so good to hold you again, you have no idea.”

  “Maybe I do.” I debated asking him my next question, but I really, really needed to know. “Were we alone on a beach the first time we…you know…”

  He groaned again, as if in true pain, and squeezed me so tight against his chest he’d have crushed me if I were normal. “Babe, you’re killing me. I’m sorry, but I really don’t think I can tell you that particular story right now. I’m too…” He blew out another breath, squirming as he tried to get comfortable. “I just can’t.”

  That I had such an effect on him was both terrifying and thrilling. “I don’t need details,” I said. “I just need to know if my dream was real. Did we…on the beach…my first time?”

  It took him a moment to answer. His arms trembled around me, probably because he was trying so hard to restrain himself. “Sorry, Jamie. As nice as that could have been, that’s not how it happened. Not even close. We were at the cabin. There was snow outside. A roaring fire inside. Frosty windows… A soft fir rug…” He swallowed loudly and buried his face in my neck. “It was perfect.”

  I closed my stinging eyes and braced myself against the sharp pain lancing my heart. It sounded perfect. And unfamiliar. My dream had just been a dream.

  I tried to hold on to the hope that dreaming had given me, but it wasn’t easy when all of my memories with Ryan sounded so amazing. He cherished every moment we’d spent together. I hated that I couldn’t cherish them with him.

  “We’ll have that night again, Sunshine. You have my word,” Ryan said, his voice a gentle but firm whisper. “Or if you need something different, we can find your tropical beach. It sounds like it was a really good dream.”

  When I said nothing, he lifted my face up to his and pecked my lips. “No sad thoughts right now. You dreamed, Jamie. That’s a good thing.” He paused, and another wicked smile crept over his face. “And for your first dream, you dreamed of us naked. That’s not something to be sad about.”

  I gasped. “I did not! We were not naked!”

  “We were getting there. That’s good enough for me.” He kissed me again, hard, a
nd then pulled back with one last groan. “Come on; we should get up. I’d love to keep you to myself for the rest of the day, but there are a lot of people worried about you.”

  His words brought reality crashing down on me, and I finally remembered why I’d been asleep in this bed. The events that led to me passing out were a bit jumbled, but I remembered enough. “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe I forgot!” I jumped up, tugging Ryan with me. “Why didn’t you say something?”

  Ryan laughed. “I meant to, but you kind of distracted me, babe.”

  I snorted. “You are such a guy.”

  Superspeed was involved as I showered and made myself presentable. Only seconds after I got out of bed, Ryan and I went in search of Major Wilks. As Ryan led me through the maze of boring identical halls, I realized my stomach felt hollow. “What time is it? How long was I out?”

  “It’s been about twenty-four hours.”

  Well, that explained it. Food was definitely going to have to be a priority soon, but there was something I needed to do first. “Where’s Tyson?”

  Ryan grimaced. “He’s still in the infirmary.”

  Still in the infirmary, twenty-four hours later? My heart gave out. What had I done?

  When the lights above us flickered, Ryan sighed. “Relax, Jamie. He’s going to be fine. They’re just being cautious because he’s a PAC, and a kid.”

  That didn’t make me feel better. “Will you take me to him?”

  “Way ahead of you, Sunshine.” Ryan pointed to a sign on a nearby door, indicating we were already there.

  I stumbled to a stop, suddenly too overwhelmed to take another step. Ryan paused beside me. “Something wrong?”

  “You knew I’d want to go see him first.”

  “Of course I did.”

  My chest burned, and I could barely speak past the lump in my throat. It was just like in my dream. He’d given me what I needed, before I’d even realized I needed it. Ryan’s answering smile, when he realized why I was so overwhelmed, was so understanding, and full of love that it pushed my emotions over the edge. My eyes filled with tears.