Hayden turns around, facing the wall instead of them, hiding her beautifully bruised face. But she wasn’t quick enough. Her mother notices, “Hayden Marie, what is that on your face?”
Hayden is going to be pissed but I fucking don’t care. I answered, “Her lovely boyfriend.”
Hayden turns her attention to me and says, “Are you fucking for real?”
Cilla interrupts, “What the hell happened?”
Hayden looks at her mother and answers, “Richard hit me last night. There, I said it. Can we leave this alone?”
Ralphie voices his opinion, “The fucker is dead.”
Cilla looks at me. “Where is Charlie?”
“Right here, gamma,” a childlike voice in the background.
We all turn our attention to Charlie, who is smiling ear to ear.
Hayden asks, “Charlie, why the big smiles?”
“I saw mommy kissing daddy. Gamma and papa are here. My family.”
My hand grabs Hayden’s. I squeeze it. He said my family. That included Ralphie and me. I turn my attention to Hayden and see her eyes glistening up again. He must have heard the entire conversation but all he took from it was that his family is together. Hayden looks at me. She removes her hand and wraps her arm around my waist. Is she really doing this?
Cilla comments, “Sweetie, we are family.”
He skips into the kitchen, “Yep!”
Hayden looks at me and asks, “Can we talk in private?”
I nod my head in agreement.
Hayden
My mother and Ralphie help with breakfast while I lead James to my bedroom. I shut the door and look at him. Before I can say anything, he has to open his mouth, “Wow. This is a first. I didn’t realize private talk was code for fucking.”
I roll my eyes at him once more and hit him in the gut. I laugh, “As much as you are a good lay and all, that is not why I brought you in here.”
He walks toward me, coming stomach to stomach, face to face. “Tell me why I am in here.”
“We need to talk about all of this. I know this is happening so damn fast. Literally, just a few weeks ago, I was a single mother. Then bam, the father of my son pops into our life. You came into my life and literally turned it around. I haven’t spoken to my boyfriend in days. My mind and body has been consumed by you. Why is that?”
I glare at him.
He responds, “The same reason I am consumed by you.”
“We only had one night together. Now, I can’t get enough of you. I lied to the man I thought I was going to marry. I wanted to protect you.”
He laughs, “I don’t need protecting.”
“That is not the point. Why can’t I control myself with you? Then seeing how Charlie is toward you.”
James puts his hands on my waist. “Hays, I just want to be the man I never had from my dad. I look at Charlie and it is all done for me. He is my life. I look at you and…”
“What?”
“I don’t know yet. I do know I want to protect and be there for him, for you, and for us. Like you, I don’t know where this is going but the ride is something I have never experienced before.”
“James. I do love Richard. But…”
“He fucking hit you.”
“I know. I’ve never seen that side of him before and it scares me. I’m afraid for Charlie and me.”
“What do I need to do?”
“Do what you want to do. Help me change the locks.”
“Is that all?’
“For now.”
“Anything else?”
I laugh, “Is there something else?”
“You’re going to make me ask, aren’t you?”
“Get on your knees and ask!”
“Woman.”
“Do it!”
“I’m staying.”
“That doesn’t sound like asking.”
“Fuck, asking. I’m telling you.”
“Mmmhmm.” I bite down on my lip, knowing it is going to drive him crazy.
He grabs me and pulls me closer. “I want to fuck you so bad right now. But…”
“I wanna go for a ride.”
“How are we going to do that?”
“I think Charlie wants some grandma time. If she says no, we will pull in the big dog. Ralphie!”
He smirks at me. “I like the way you are thinking. I have somewhere I want to take you.”
I wink at him. “Let’s do this.”
“Fucking you? Okay.”
I push him away from me. “No, silly. You know damn well what I meant.”
“One could only hope.”
I take another breath. “You know, this thing with Richard is not going to be good?”
“What are you struggling with?”
“I’ve been with him for a long time and just like that, it is done. I still…”
“Don’t say it. I’m here for you.” James wraps his burly arms around me and lays a kiss on my forehead. “You’re not getting rid of me. You’re mine now. He comes near you, I will handle it.”
“Wow. I didn’t know it was time for you to claim me already.”
He grunts, “I claimed you a long time ago. You didn’t look hard enough.”
“Neither did you. Mr. I was in Germany.”
I bite down on my lip once more.
He muffles, “Fuck, woman.”
And that is that. James tightens his hold on me and lifts me up to him, slamming a kiss on me. I wrap my legs around him, accepting his kiss. Damn, I move fast. I have not even ended it with my boyfriend and I have been claimed by James. Now, he is going to show me how he is going to seal the deal.
James carries me to the bed and we fall onto it. His hands creep up my shirt to grab my breast, he caresses it. His lips never leaving mine. Our tongues start to dance in unison. My roaming hands go straight for his belt buckle and button on his jeans. His very eager cock is ready to bust through the zipper. Snap. Zip. And out comes his glorious dick. I grasp it, starting to pump. James moans. I whisper, “Fuck me, baby.”
He groans, “Trust me. I will.” His mouth trails to my neck, leaving tingling kisses. Electricity zings through my body. I’m wet in anticipation of him taking me.
“Don’t hold back.”
“Woman, you’re all mine.”
“Prove it.”
James shoves down my pajama bottoms and tears off my shirt, exposing all of me. His shirt comes flying off and pants pushed down on the floor. James slams into me, hitting me hard with everything he has. My legs hook tighter around him, squeezing him. This man fits me perfect. Every single inch of him, pushing harder, hitting my spot. Moans seep through me. I cannot control what he is doing to me. I grab his firm ass, digging my nails into him. Nothing but groans and moans as skin slaps against each other. My body starts to convulse and then…
Banging on the door and a little boyish voice says, “Mommy. Mommy. I need you.”
And come kill. Fuck.
I push James off of me. He looks as confused and sexually frustrated as I am right now.
I holler, “Be right there, honey.”
My attention goes back to a very sexy naked James. I comment, “Welcome to parenthood.”
Looking down at his very erect cock, he laughs, “Our son just blue balled us!”
“Pretty much,” I laugh while rolling my eyes. “Go to the bathroom and take care of yourself.”
“What about you?”
“You will take care of me later.” I get off the bed and so does he.
James smacks my bare ass while I start to dress myself. “Damn straight.”
Chapter 13
Hayden
I hold on tight while James drives his bike along the highway toward Ponca. In the distance, the mighty Mo is brown and dingy as ever. The Missouri River is gross but right now, the brown is offset by the broccoli colored trees above the horizon. James is taking me to The Cabin, owned by his best friend, Ajax. He owns it, but it is a community cabin. When the boys want to get
away, this is where they go. James says it is important to them all. Not everyone is allowed to go to The Cabin. I guess I should feel privileged to be allowed to go. Honestly, I do not care. When my mother saw James and I together - frazzled, messy hair, and flushed, she grinned. She knew. James asked Ralphie and her to watch Charlie while he and I set off to get to know each other. Before James even finished the question, my mother responded with a quick yes.
The ride to The Cabin allowed me to clear my mind on what to do about Richard. One would say this is a break-up. Everything I have done with James in the past week is unforgivable in a relationship. However, what he did to me last night is another story. He hit me. Yes, I was trying to cover up my infidelity. I know what I am doing with James is bad, but I don’t regret it. Goodness, this sounds so bad. But seeing him with our son, I fell in love with what I saw. The father of my son bonding as if there were no barriers. Like they were meant to be father and son. Despite never meeting each other, they acted as if they have been in each other’s lives since day one. This is just so weird.
When I look at James, something inside me becomes unpredictable. I just want to be wrapped up in his muscular arms. Those tatted beauties bring out the woman I want to be for my man. It is like I want to be his woman. His old lady.
Shit. I’ve become my mother.
We pull up to a two-story log cabin that is lake front property. What the hell does Ajax do for a living to own such a beautiful piece of land with a home? The Cabin looks like something out of a movie. Like it should be nestled in the woods and a retired couple should be rocking in chairs on the wraparound porch decking. This is surreal. Plus, it is kept up. The lawn is landscaped. Pontoon boat hooked up to the dock. Shit, there is even a flower bed. Do bikers really own this? What kind of biker group is this? All these questions that need to be answered.
It dawns on me that I barely know anything about James. Maybe fucking is going to have to wait until after I get the details. I am going to enjoy this time with him. Getting to know the father of my son. The man I cannot control myself around.
After unpacking our clothes, which wasn’t very much− I guess the plan is to be naked a lot; I am totally fine with that− I scope out the cabin, imagining all the places James could take me. Then it hits me. Has he taken others here before? Has he fucked many women in the places I envision him fucking me. Jealousy creeps over me. I cannot be like that. If he has, that was before all of this. Fuck, I am the one with a boyfriend who I need to end things with.
James is sitting on a wooden chair outside on the patio. He is looking at the lake in front of him. The sun’s rays are in contact with his black wraparound sunglasses. His features are more prominent. A red tinge barely masked his jet black hair. He is like a statue, just sitting there, thinking. Me, on the other hand, in awe of the man sitting there, I walk over to him and sit on his lap, wrapping my arms around his shoulders. His massive, bulky arms do the same around my waist.
His attention focuses on me. He acknowledges, “Hey, babe.”
I lean down to kiss him and soon, pull away. I demand, “Tell me everything.”
He looks at me confused. “What?”
“I don’t know much about you. As much as I love fucking you, I want to know you.”
He smirks, “You love fucking me?”
Playfully, I hit him. “For real. But seriously, tell me who you are.”
He sighs, “Nothing much to tell. I work with dead veterans. Army veteran. Biker. Now, a father.”
“I know those things. What about your family? You never mention them.”
“Nothing much to say about them. My father left my mother and me when I was young. My mother was a club whore. Ralphie pretty much raised me.”
“You shouldn’t refer to your mother as a club whore.”
“Well, that is what she was. Her focus was to find someone to take care of her. She forgot about me.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. But she still took care of you.”
“Sometimes. If it wasn’t for Ralphie, I probably would’ve been in jail or something. I wanted to be like him and fight for this country. And, of course, ride with them in the club. That is who had my back.”
“What happened to your mother?”
His brown eyes stare at me. I sense his annoyance with all the questions but clearly, there is mommy and daddy issues here. With anger in his tone, he response, “If you really want to know. Overdose. Her last boyfriend was a piece of work. I was in the army when it happened. There was only so much Ralphie could do. It is what it is.”
“I guess. You have a lot of resentment toward your mother.”
“And father.”
“Okay.”
“I will never do what my father did to my mother and me. He created her. Charlie will not grow up with an absent father. I’m not going to lose any more time with him.”
I smile, “I like hearing that. Fathers are important.”
“Speaking of fathers. Your father?”
“He died when I was sixteen. Motorcycle accident.”
He squeezes his hold on me tighter. “Babe, I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Thanks. My mother likes her bikers, let me tell ya. I swore I would never date one. And look at me here. I had a baby with one. Repeating the pattern.”
He laughs, “Pattern or no pattern, you aren’t getting rid of me.”
It pains me to feel this way, but with his family issues, will that hinder his relationship with Charlie? His role models were absent in his life. But he grew up just fine. Successful and seems happy. But, at our age, he has no one to love him unconditionally or someone who did. I know I was a notch on the old bed several years ago. Fuck, I am still a notch. But has he ever gotten serious about any of those notches? Has he experienced love, especially since he was never really loved?
I pause, “Are you sure you are up for all this? Charlie, me?”
He squints his eyes at me. “Why would you ask that?”
Inhaling then exhaling, I respond, “Just a little concerned.”
“Why are you concerned?”
“All of this is new to you? Being a father without having a father.”
“More reason, I’m going to be a better father. Why are you questioning this? You grew up without a father.”
“Not by his choice. And I grew up with a mother who was around.”
He stands up from the chair, I practically fall down on the cement. “I can’t believe you are questioning if I will be a good family man.” He runs his hand through his jet black hair.
“I’m sorry to question that, but I would be lying if I said it didn’t concern me.”
The intensity in his brown eyes grew blacker in anger. “Just because I grew up without a father and had a mother who preferred men and drugs over her son, will not make me a shitty dad. I get your concern. But you need to hear me when I say this. I grew up with a different family. A man who is not my father by blood. He made sure I was on the straight and narrow. Yes, I had moments where I was lost because of the demons of my parents. But the club, Ralphie, and my brothers from the service were my family. They were there for me through every damn obstacle.”
I get up from the cement and stand near James, grabbing his chiseled arm. “I’m sorry to judge you like that. Charlie is my world and I would hate for him to experience heartache.”
He shrugs out of my grasp and turns around. “Charlie will never experience the bull shit I experienced as a kid. His mother would never do what my mother did. His father will not leave him or his mother. Hays…”
He faces me, wrapping his rather large arms around my waist and continues, “Hays…I can’t explain what is going on between us. All I know is that I am not letting this go. I want to be the man you deserve. I want to be the father your son has always wanted. All I want is to be with Charlie and you. I will do whatever it takes.”
I tearfully laugh, “You know it has only been like a week and you can’t live without me.”
H
e shakes his head at me. “I can’t believe I have been living without you.”
“Is this insta-love?”
He smirks, “More like I’m going to insta-fuck you.”
“Please do. Right here. Right now.” I wiggle from his hold and strip myself down.
James grins, “Not afraid to fuck in public.”
“Whoever is around will get a show.”
“Yes, they will.” He unbuckles his pants and pushes them down. I aid in taking his tight gray shirt off.
I demand, “Sit down on the chair. I’m going to ride you.”
“Talk dirty to me, baby.”
“Sit down.”
“Demanding.” He does exactly what I ask. I wrap my legs around him like I straddle his bike. His cock eases into me. A moan creeps out from both of us. My knees push down into the wicker chair, as I slide up and down his joy stick. My eyes roll back. My tits dangle in front of his face. He cups one, bringing it close to his mouth, soon sucking on my anxious nipple. His tongue swirls around, sending zings throughout my body. My hips move faster, continuing with the up and down motion.
He moans, “Baby, you taste so good. You feel so good.”
My speed picks up. I move his mouth from my nipple. I demand, “Look up at me.”
My arms hug his neck, squeezing him closer to my naked chest. I continue to ride. He looks at me while I look at him. Passion overflowing from his eyes. I slide down harder, causing him to go deeper in me. I move up again, then down. I moan, “James, I’m close.”
“That’s it, baby. Keep riding that dick.”
My body begins to spaz as I enjoy every inch of his cock inside of me. “James, oh my God.”
“Keep going, baby. I want this for the rest of my life. You, all of you.”
And…I lost it. The woman in me comes out on the stage and belts her heartfelt note. The lake community is no longer peaceful. Birds are fluttering from the trees. Deer run scared across the lawn. Fish jumping out of the water.
James grunts as he releases all of himself inside of me. In that moment of sex, we become one. I am afraid to think it is more than sex, but it is. It is the next level of intimacy. James and I are all about each other. There is no one else. No Richard. No other girls. It is just him and me. I think I could be falling in love with someone I barely know. But I know him. This connection between him and me is more than Charlie. We are magnets who have been waiting for years to connect again.
All I Wanna Do (Hell's Phoenix MC Series Book 1) Page 8