The Pull of Destiny (Undying Love, Book 2)

by Felicity Kross

  “I’ll go to Ilenima and ask the oracle myself,” I say. “If I tell him what’s going on, explain the situation, surely he’ll allow it.”

  The confidant folds her arms in front of her. “I advise against it,” she says. “However, I won’t stand in your way if you really think that’s the best thing to do.”

  “I do,” I say confidently.

  The confidant shakes her head.

  “Someone needs to tell him,” I conclude. “And I’ll do it.”

  She smiles, a small smile. “With your resolve, maybe Cassius will listen. Maybe yours is the voice he needs to hear. Go then. Go to Ilenima and do whatever you want to do. Talk to Cassius. Whatever you want. I wish you luck.” She reaches back for her glass of water and takes a sip. “But don’t leave until I’ve written you a note. You know how angels are about protocol. And I want to make sure you are allowed to talk to Cassius alone.”

  I hesitate before answering, “Understood.”

  She must see that I’m antsy to get going because she says, “I’ll do it in a moment. After I finish this glass of water.”

  I stare as she drinks the water quickly. She places the empty glass in the sink. I stand gawking at her, still trying to figure out what she’s doing with a glass of water in the first place. I’d ask, but I’ve already caused her enough trouble.

  “I can see you’re dying to ask,” she remarks. “I’m surprised you haven’t just done it already. To be honest, this whole pregnancy thing isn’t agreeing with me. Sometimes water helps.”

  I feel rude and confused all at once. If the confidant isn’t feeling well, why would the oracle allow her to be here? Why would he have her take his place?

  “I’m sorry,” I say.

  “Don’t be. It’ll pass. It always does. Now let’s get you a private audience with Cassius.”

  IMAE, GRACIOUS BABYSITTER that she is, actually allows me to go sit outside on the roof. I much prefer outside on the roof, even with the morning sun coming down, to being inside of that fucking base. I squint as the sun starts peeking out, but I invite the displeasure it brings. It’s nothing compared to the physical tortures I’ve been enduring recently. It’s like a slight tickle on my skin, something I can ignore easily enough.

  I look at Imae as she holds out her arms, welcoming the sun with a smile on her face. Her white blond hair looks like more of a gold in this light.

  “I don’t know how I never pegged you and that made angel together before,” I comment. “He must get his snooty attitude from you. What do you feel for him? What was that kiss about?”

  Imae keeps her attention on the sun, but she responds, “Angels often kiss greetings. It’s a rather normal thing to do. Surely you know that, Arsen.

  Did I know that? I guess I did, or at least I’ve heard of it.

  “I’ve never seen it,” I say.

  “We don’t kiss when on duty. The times you’ve been through Zenith you were likely only paying attention to the angels on duty, yes?”

  “You got me there, sweetheart,” I reply. “I don’t really get the kiss though, since you angels are so against sex. Or am I wrong about that, too?”

  “You know so little, demon. We aren’t against sex. However, angels are only allowed to have sex when they are able to conceive. When a female is able to conceive, she takes a mate and those two angels are paired together forever.” She scowls as she looks at me. “Why am I explaining this to you?”

  “I’m curious and you are a benevolent angel eager to answer my questions,” I say nonchalantly.

  She huffs. “The kiss I shared with Rynne wasn’t about sex. A greeting kiss is a chaste kiss that signifies compassion and a love for all beings worthy of love.”

  “Is that really how it works?” I ask.

  I flash her a wolfish grin. I want nothing more than to rip out her heart. I want to rip out the hearts of everyone keeping Tasia prisoner. I could do it. Without Tasia here, without her commanding me, and if I ignored the fact that she’d hate me forever for it, I could go out there and kill every single one of them. What’s stopping me is the fact that I’ll never get her on my side if I do something like that, and though I’m sure I could kill most of them, I couldn’t say for sure I’d be able to clear out the entire base with how weak I have become. Especially with Valor around. She is very strong. She’s a warrior through and through, like no other angel I’ve ever met.

  I have to be careful about the battles I pick. I need to be smart about this. Somehow I have to show Tasia that the angels are only using her. If I could do that, I could get her on my side, and then we could easily escape this place together. That’s what my beast wants. But would we get away? She’s so deep inside of Cassius’s grasp maybe running away with her wouldn’t be wise at all. That’s what my logician thinks. She’s a problem no matter how I look at it, and yet my beast wants to save her. It wants to take her away from all of this. I want to take her away from all of this. Most of all I want her on my side. I want her to believe me. I want her to see me.

  “Why are you looking at me like that?” Imae asks, narrowing her yellow-green eyes.

  “Just how long do you think they can keep me on a leash like this?” I ask, feeling rage well up inside of me. “As soon as I get the chance, I’m going to make you regret all of this. You know that, right? I’ll rip into every single one of you. I’ll rip you all apart, piece by piece.” With each word I say, I take a step closer to her, and I stare her down. My dominance is overpowering. She flinches well before I close the distance between us.

  “Those are big words coming from a demon who has let himself fall so far.”

  I growl as I twist around to see Valor strutting toward me with an overpowering dominance of her own. She challenges me the same way I was just challenging Imae. Her gaze, however, is much harder to hold. I’m the one who ends up flinching as she draws a silver sword to my neck and presses it up against my throat.

  “Are you going to cut off my head?” I ask.

  “If I was going to do that,” she says, “I would have done it already. I would’ve done it before you had a chance to flinch.”

  She withdraws her sword and sheaths it.

  “You had better watch your back, Imae,” Valor says.

  “Understood,” my babysitter replies. “It won’t happen again, Confidant.”

  “Confidant? I know you were the master of the elite team of demons back when the Servant Program was in place. Is that why you’re here? Are you here to enslave demons? Is that what the current confidant does?”

  “I do as the oracle wishes,” she informs.

  I laugh. “Well, you’re a much more competent confident than the previous one. It seems Cassius wised up.”

  I take a big whiff of the air around me. I haven’t given it much thought, but Valor smells odd. Not angel odd, just… odd. Where have I smelled something like this before? She couldn’t be…

  “Are you pregnant?” I ask.

  “It took you this long to figure that out?” she remarks. “You have dull senses, Arsen.”

  “I’ve had a lot of other things occupying my senses.” I raise an eyebrow. “I smacked you pretty hard with my tail that night, but apparently you’re just fine, hm? Whose is it? Don’t tell me. It’s the oracle’s, right?” I smirk. “So that’s why you’re the confidant now. Cassius needs an heir, right? Took him long enough to figure out Leo couldn’t do that for him.” I laugh.

  “Hold your tongue,” Imae threatens. “Not every love amounts to sex, demon. You know nothing of love.”

  I shrug. “Whatever you say.”

  “I think I can understand your hatred, Arsen,” Valor says. “Angels have enslaved demons. Though that is not the term we would use, I can see how it could be perceived as such. You have never known anything but life under our rule. I have no love for you or your kind, Arsen, but that does not mean I hate you. That is the angel way after all. Your treatment, your lot in life, is just. Evil had to be put in its place, and you are evil. I
was raised to believe that and I always have. I still do. However, there have been angels much softer than I. There have been angels who have been openly compassionate toward demons like you. Some angels have believed that you demons deserve the same kind of compassion as every other creature.”

  She steps closer to me, until our noses are almost touching, but I don’t back down. She reaches out her hand, and tugs my head upward by grasping the hair at the back of my neck, but I maintain eye contact.

  She says deadly calm, “If you did deserve compassion, Arsen. If compassion was really what it took to prove you’re more than the monster you appear to be, then why did you kill the only angel who must have believed in you?”

  She lets go of my hair, allowing me to straighten out my neck once again. I don’t have any idea what she’s talking about. An angel who showed me compassion? There is no angel that has ever shown me compassion.

  I glance at Imae who looks as confused as I am.

  “Do keep an eye on him,” Valor says to my babysitter as she dismisses herself, jumping down from the roof and easily landing on her feet.

  Imae glares at me, but I shake off the gesture.

  Hell, I really want to rip something apart. I haven’t had the opportunity to rip apart anything that I’ve wanted to rip apart for too long. I need my fix. Fucking angels.

  I’VE NEVER BEEN in this part of the Citadel before. Everything is going smoothly so far thanks to the confidant’s note. I requested an audience with the oracle, but not in the Great Hall. I said I wanted to speak to him privately, basically as a social greeting. This is informal. That’s why I was sent to this room. It’s like a waiting room of some sort. It looks similar to the rest of the Citadel, but it’s small. It has some comfortable chairs cushioned with red velvet seats, a bright contrast against the bluish tint of the frost crystals.

  I was told to wait here, but the longer I wait the more nervous I get. I’ve never once requested to see the oracle, and especially not like this. I’ve never talked to the oracle much at all to be perfectly honest. Imae has always been the one watching out for me. She’s the angel that I’ve always interacted with. Most of my other angel interactions have been few and far in between. Imae’s words, and my assignments always come down from the oracle, but that has been the only real relation I’ve had to him. Now I’m here to see the oracle, and I’m basically going to tell him that what he’s doing to Tasia isn’t working. I’m here to ask him to stop. I have no idea how that’s going to go over, but I have to do it.

  I bolt out of my chair as soon as I hear the door open. Sure enough, the oracle is standing before me. He closes the door gently behind him. I look forward, and we greet each other with a kiss. Then he outstretches his hand and gestures to the seats.

  “Please make yourself comfortable,” he says.

  After I’m seated, he says, “So why is it you wanted to see me? Specifically, why did you want to see my like this? Surely Valor could’ve answered any questions or concerns you might have, and yet she sent you here. Unfortunately, I am quite busy, so we won’t have much time.”

  “I apologize,” I say with a slight bow of my head.

  “I’m listening.”

  “It’s about Tasia,” I say. “She’s been acting strangely, different from how she usually acts. I’m worried about her.”

  “I assure you Tasia is just fine. She’s adapting to how she needs to control Arsen. It’s a rocky stage, but everything will be okay. You need to continue to be supportive of her through this. She needs you now more than ever.”

  I frown.

  “Are you saying you want to back out now that things are getting hard?” he asks. “Relationships aren’t always easy. If you really love her, you’ll have to work through this with her.”

  “That isn’t it.” I shake my head. “I want to help her. That’s why I’m here. I think the white diamond you’ve been tuning to her, whatever you’ve been doing to it, has backfired. The light that always came from her doesn’t seem to exist anymore. It’s slowly becoming tainted. It’s not about an adjustment. She’s angry, erratic. She’s falling apart. She’s always been so compassionate, and now I see none of that in her at all. Angels are supposed to be compassionate, and yet this whole situation with Arsen seems—” I stop myself.

  The oracle looks at me intensely, the color of his eyes stopping on a bright yellow, and says, “Please continue. Say what you mean to say.”

  I swallow the lump in my throat. “It all seems very contradictory to angels somehow. It feels like darkness is moving in instead of out,” I say quietly.

  The oracle continues to watch me with those bright eyes of his, but the colors in them are changing again. I feel like I shouldn’t even be allowed in his presence. There’s something different about his eyes, something I can’t begin to understand. Maybe it’s the years of life essence, or maybe it’s just the fact that he’s the oracle.

  After a moment of silence, the oracle asks, “Do you think demons deserve compassion, Rynne? You had as much hatred as Tasia does now for demons and monsters when you were first brought to Ilenima. You learned that hatred doesn’t serve an angel, and it has no purpose among us, but you also learned that demons aren’t beings that can be saved. You learned a righteous fury.”

  “I understand that,” I reply. “I don’t feel any compassion for demons, and I’ve learned to put away my anger and hatred, but I feel so confused. I’ve been taught never to make another creature suffer. Whenever I’ve killed, I’ve always done it in the quickest and most efficient way possible. I’ve never fought a made demon intending for them to suffer, because that’s not what we do. We don’t create suffering.” I take a deep breath before I ask what I shouldn’t ask, “You did that to Arsen, that night he returned all burned and bloody, didn’t you? What was that? How could he have wounds like that and not be able to heal? That was spite. That was the power of hatred. That was being no better than a demon.”

  I can’t believe I just said that. It’s what I’ve been feeling, but I never put it into words, even inside of my own head. However, it’s the truth about how I feel. Could something done in pure righteousness have such a painful lasting effect even on a demon? My hands are shaking in my lap as I try to keep eye contact with the oracle. He’s regarding me quietly, and I can’t read anything in his face, but I’m sure I stepped too far.

  “God is not simple benevolence,” the oracle says calmly. “God has brought flood, famine, and pestilence to wipe out wickedness when it has become too much. It is not our place to make evil suffer, but it is what God has planned for all beings of evil. Demons suffer by simply being what they are. They are beings that never had any good in them to begin with. What you saw was indeed the aftermath of something I had done to Arsen, but it wasn’t hatred. His wounds were the result of a righteous fury, the righteousness of God. That’s why they took so long to heal. The suffering was necessary to help mold Arsen’s compliance.” He sighs. “Perhaps you could use a bit of advice.”

  I don’t say anything.

  The oracle stares at me as he says, “There have been angels who have let love and compassion cloud their judgment when it comes to demons, and it costs them dearly every time. Do not become one of those angels.”

  I’m surprised I’m still here talking to the oracle. I’m surprised he hasn’t kicked me out. I’m going to take things farther.

  “Would you at least come and see Tasia?” I ask. “You could tell for yourself if something is wrong. All I’m asking is for you to see her.”

  “There is no reason for me to, Rynne. This change, everything Tasia’s going through, is going to be hard, but she can get through it. You can help her. What needs work is your faith. Tasia needs you now more than ever. She made her choice to follow through with destiny. She has decided not to fight her fate but to embrace it. She is doing what it takes to save her world. Don’t turn your back on her when she needs you the most. None of this is happening without her consent.”

  “I
understand,” I say quickly. “Thank you for your time, Oracle.”

  We both stand up at the same time. The oracle regards me once more. “Don’t forget what I said, Rynne. Tasia needs you. Go back to Terra.”

  I watch as the oracle leaves the room. He closes the door behind him, allowing me a moment to myself. I understand what he is saying, and it makes sense, but I can’t shake this feeling I have. I can’t shake my doubt. I don’t know how to continue functioning on blind faith when I don’t understand the reasons behind so many things. Call me unfaithful or unworthy, but it’s the truth.

  Tasia said she wants to do this. I heard her say it, long before the oracle began altering her white diamond. She went with the oracle willingly. I know that is true.

  I’m the one stepping on her freewill. She said she wants to do this. She agreed to it. I need to stand by her. I will. I have. But now I need to stop my fear. I need to stop fighting against destiny, especially the destiny Tasia herself has accepted. I am the one who’s been making things harder for her.

  Where has all my doubt been coming from lately? Is it from my strange conversations with the confidant? Am I easily swayed? Do I feel sympathy for Arsen?

  I don’t know the answer, but I do know one thing: I will stand by Tasia. I won’t run because I love her.

  “WE FOUND UDEN. Arsen’s antics weren’t much of a setback after all.” Valor announces.

  I avoided Rynne pretty much all day yesterday. I slept most of the day anyway. It’s a good thing I did with all the excitement happening now.

  “It sounds like Uden hasn’t gone out of his way to talk to or meet with anyone. Divya found him hanging out in the ocean, miles off from the East Coast, but he’s not as far out as you might think. He seems to be staying there, in that area. Maybe he’s hoping to wait things out and return to his pub,” Fiona informs.

  “If Divya is the one who found him, where is she?” I ask.

  “She’s observing him right now,” Valor replies. “Tasia, you will go with Imae and Arsen to track Uden down. I’ve decided a small team, with concentrated power like yours, would be best to capture him. Your goal is to bring him back here completely subdued so that we can interrogate him.”