Paper Boats

by Lestari, Dee

  Kugy felt a bit uneasy as she climbed in. Although Remi was always relaxed when it came to dealing with his employees, Kugy was still intimidated by the fact that her boss was driving her home. But Remi seemed calm and unaware that anything unusual was happening. Finally Kugy decided she was the one who should get over her own uneasiness.

  The car was extremely clean, and the fragrance of the seat leather mingled with the scent of air freshener. Music thumped softly in the background. “Is this Dead or Alive?” she asked, then began singing along.

  “You know this band?” Remi asked. “Were you even born when this song came out?”

  “Yeah, yeah, I know.” Kugy laughed. “But as people say, I’m something else. This is the music I’ve been listening to forever. It’s like I’m stuck in the 1980s.”

  “Yeah, that’s pretty unusual,” said Remi, nodding. “But I’m not surprised. Karel told me how ‘unique’ you are.”

  “‘Unique’ is just a polite way of saying I’m weird.”

  “Life is too short to be ordinary,” said Remi. “I appreciate all things unique, weird, and extraordinary. Maybe that’s why I hired you. I have a sixth sense for sniffing out weirdness. And it looks like I made the right choice.”

  Kugy couldn’t help but grin. “Thanks for giving me a chance to be a project leader. I know all I have going for me is luck.”

  Remi shook his head. “Winning the lottery—that’s luck. This is different. You have natural talent. All you have to do is be yourself in the role you have now. All someone like you needs is a chance.”

  Kugy nodded slowly. It felt too awkward to say anything. She looked out the window and watched the traffic, which was nearly at a standstill.

  “Are you in a hurry to get home?” Remi asked.

  “Why?”

  “This traffic is terrible. It might be better to wait until it’s less busy before getting back on the road. It’s not a problem, is it?”

  Kugy shook her head. “Not at all.”

  Remi pointed to a café up ahead. “We’ll stop there first, okay? Their coffee’s pretty good.”

  “Sure,” she said with a slight shrug, though deep down she was marveling at it all. What a strange day, she thought. Not only had she suddenly gotten a huge promotion—the owner of the company was having a conversation with her in his car. She couldn’t wait to tell Neptune about this.

  After two cappuccinos, two servings of ice cream, and an enormous plate of fries, they might as well have been two old friends talking and laughing, equal in age and status. Kugy forgot about the eight-year age gap between them. And she also forgot that their respective ranks were as removed from each other as heaven and earth—one of them was an intern who had just graduated, and the other the owner of his own company.

  Kugy told him she had wound up at AdVocaDo because of her love, starting in childhood, of anything to do with words. She related her life story in her usual storyteller manner, full of energy and fire. Remi’s response was to listen earnestly, gawk, smile, and at points, double over with laughter.

  “You’re beginning to regret it, aren’t you? Hiring me as one of your employees?” Kugy was shaking and clutching her sides as she asked this. She felt very comfortable being herself in front of Remi now.

  “As an employee, you’re an asset—the most promising I’ve ever come across. But as a friend, yeah, I’m beginning to have my doubts.” Remi chuckled. “Still, I want to be one of Neptune’s secret agents, too.”

  “What’s your sign?”

  “Libra.”

  Kugy shook her head, her expression serious. “That may be difficult. A basic requirement for becoming one of Neptune’s agents is that you have to be an Aquarius. So Libra, huh? With its scales of justice? Hmm. Whose agent could you be?”

  “How about an agent for the National Bureau of Logistics? They’re in charge of food distribution. I could weigh rice.”

  “That could work. And agents who work for Neptune need to eat rice, too, don’t they? Me especially. So when it comes down to it, we need each other.”

  “I feel like there’s an imbalance here. If I give you rice, what’ll you give me? Seawater?”

  “Seafood,” Kugy answered. “It goes well with rice. How about it? Good deal, eh?”

  “Sure. How about tomorrow night after work? Sixish? We’ll eat dinner at a seafood restaurant. There’s a really good place in Radio Dalam.”

  Kugy felt that what happened earlier in the lobby was repeating itself. She thought of boxing for some reason: Remi was an agile and formidable opponent, slipping in several blows before she’d even had the chance to adopt a fighter’s stance. Unprepared, and unable to put up any opposition, she nodded slowly and accepted Remi’s invitation.

  “Excuse me, Noni?”

  Noni, who had been busy sweeping her room, propped the broom against the wall and went to answer the door. It was Ellen, the freshman now occupying the room next to hers.

  “Yes, Ellen? What is it?”

  “I was just cleaning my cupboards, and I found this.” Ellen handed her something wrapped in plain blue paper. “I almost threw it away by accident.”

  Noni took it with a frown. It was large and heavy, and judging by its shape, it was a book or a photo album.

  “The person who used to live in my room—she was a friend of yours, right? It must be hers.”

  “I’ve never seen it before,” Noni said with a shrug. “But I’ll ask her about it if I see her. Thanks, Ellen.”

  When her new neighbor had left, Noni sat down and placed the object in her lap. She was annoyed because now she had no choice but to hold on to it for safekeeping.

  She felt a passing urge to open the package, but hesitated. In the end, she placed the object inside her desk drawer. Don’t bother thinking about it. Then Noni picked up the broom and resumed sweeping.

  Kugy counted the empty shrimp shells on both their plates. “You lose by two,” she said.

  “But in the steamed-clams category, you lose by three,” answered Remi.

  “That’s not my fault,” Kugy protested. “The portions weren’t even. If there’d been an extra ten clams on my plate, I would have eaten them all, too, you know.”

  “That’s the way it goes.” Remi grinned. “So, have I eaten enough to become one of Neptune’s agents?”

  “Now hold on, hold on.” Kugy thought for a moment. “According to the protocol in the astrological agent’s guide, if non-Aquariuses want to join, they must meet certain requirements. First, they must be good at eating seafood.”

  “I’ve obviously passed,” said Remi.

  Kugy looked again at the empty plates. “True. You’ve met the first requirement. Second, you must know how to make a paper boat.”

  “Here, let me demonstrate,” said Remi. He snatched up one of the printed menus on the table, which doubled as disposable placemats. Deftly, he folded it, and before long, he produced a boat.

  “Amazing!” Kugy clapped her hands. “You’ve met the second requirement!”

  Remi’s eyes gleamed as he rubbed his hands together. “I’m beginning to feel optimistic. What’s the next one?”

  Kugy thought and thought. Then she grinned. “There is no third requirement yet.” She laughed. “Hold on, it’s coming.”

  “What kind of HR department do you guys have?” Remi complained. “Here I am, ready and waiting!”

  “I’ll bring this matter to the attention of the official association for the HR Departments of the Underwater Kingdom, and I’ll let you know, sir. Thank you for your patience.” Kugy spoke in a serious tone.

  Suddenly, the room grew dim. Several lights had been turned off. The restaurant was about to close. The waiters were standing and watching them, forced smiles on their faces. They looked polite, and also like they wanted to kick them out. Stifling their laughter, Kugy and Remi left.

  Remi dropped off Kugy at her house shortly after eleven.

  “Say hi to Karel for me,” he said before Kugy got out of the ca
r.

  Kugy nodded. “Thanks for dinner.” She opened the door and had one foot on the curb when Remi stopped her.

  “Kugy, wait a minute. Can you do something for me?” He handed her the paper boat he had made back in the restaurant.

  “What’s this for?” Kugy asked.

  “It’s for you to set out to sea tomorrow,” said Remi smoothly, warmth creeping into his gaze. “I want to send a message to Neptune.”

  “A message? Well, that means you’ll have to write something on it.” She spoke quickly. She was beginning to feel nervous.

  “No problem,” Remi said calmly. He turned on the car light and took a pen from his bag. He unfolded the paper and wrote on it, using the dashboard as a writing surface. Then he folded it into a boat again and gave it to Kugy. “And because you’re the courier, you’re allowed to read my message,” he added. His gaze made Kugy even more nervous.

  “Actually, it’s forbidden to send or receive letters until you receive confirmation that you have the job. But I’ll see what I can do. I can’t make any promises, though.” Laughing, she got out of the car.

  “It’s okay.” Remi shrugged. “No harm in trying. See you tomorrow.”

  “Bye!” Kugy waved. She watched the car until it disappeared around a bend. Without delay, she unfolded the paper boat and, with the aid of the street lamp, read what Remi had written:

  Thank you for sending Agent Kugy to my office and making this night such an enjoyable one. It’s okay if I can’t be one of your agents. But I’d really like to have dinner with her again. Hopefully your agent does, too.

  Kugy stood motionless, clutching the sheet of paper in her hand. She felt confused, anxious . . . and happy. She couldn’t tell which emotion was most dominant—all three had mingled and become one. She didn’t know what to call it. But she felt there was only one surefire antidote: sleep.

  CHAPTER 31

  THE TOILET SORORITY

  October 2002

  This was the first time Kugy had attended a gathering for employees of different ad agencies. She was new to this game, and this was her first night interacting with other people in the advertising world, seeing people whom she had only known by name, and meeting people from various firms, ranging from senior executives to newcomers like herself.

  There were almost a hundred people at the event, which was being held at a wine bar. Glasses of red and white wine along with light snacks were being circulated on trays. Kugy hadn’t eaten dinner yet, and her stomach was showing signs of dissent.

  “Iman,” she whispered, “do you think they serve food here? Rice, maybe?”

  Iman burst into laughter. “This is a wine bar, girl. Plus I don’t think they’d serve anything substantial at this hour. You could leave and get some fried rice from a warung by the roadside.”

  “Great. Thanks for the info,” Kugy answered sourly. She looked around. No one seemed to be hungry like she was. Maybe they had more experience and had anticipated the matter by eating dinner beforehand. Or maybe conversation and wine could fill one’s stomach—though obviously, that wasn’t the case with her.

  Then her eyes came to rest on Remi. Women swarmed around him like bees around honey, doing whatever they had to just so Remi would glance at them and offer up a sentence or two. Some took the opportunity to steal in for a moment and exchange kisses on the cheek with him in greeting, slipping their arms around his waist. But once this ticket had been used, they had to get back in line and wait their turn.

  What made Remi look in her direction, she didn’t know, but their eyes suddenly met. Hastily, she looked away. Her heart shrank in panic. How embarrassing, she thought. And Kugy’s panic only grew when she realized Remi had left his circle of bees and was walking straight toward her.

  “All alone?” he asked. “Don’t you want to mingle?”

  “Looking for something to eat,” Kugy answered with a grin.

  “Over there.” Remi pointed at a tray of tiny bread rolls and potato chips which were being served in pinch-sized paper cupcake holders.

  “I’m looking for more robust portions,” answered Kugy as she patted her stomach. “My pet anaconda is starting to kick up a ruckus. I don’t think it’ll be content with small-talk food anymore. I’m heading off, if that’s okay.”

  “I’ll go with you. Give me five minutes. Meet you out front.” Remi hurried away.

  Kugy tried to say something, but he had already vanished into the throng of people. Huh. I didn’t even say yes. She shook her head in amazement at how quick Remi was.

  While she waited, Kugy went to the bathroom. A group of women were lined up in front of the mirror reapplying their makeup. She didn’t know any of them, but she immediately caught the gist of the conversation they were carrying on.

  “Damn. The man gets better looking every day!”

  “I’d like to be locked up in a room with him for a week.”

  “Me, too—for a month. Who else wants to join?”

  “You know Sandy, the account executive at ViaAd? She went on a date with him.”

  Several jaws dropped. “Whaaa? Sandy?”

  “Damn! Lucky girl!”

  “It’s because of . . . you know . . . her front bumper . . .”

  They all laughed.

  “You always think about the physical!”

  “But she only got as far as one date. They’re not going out.”

  “A girl like that can’t go far, no matter how big her boobs are. In the end, it’s the brain that counts.”

  “Please. The walls have ears,” said someone in a half whisper. “So are you saying Sandy doesn’t have a brain? Oops! Did I say that?” She followed this with a sprinkle of laughter. Her friends followed suit.

  “Well, anyone who’s relying on her body to do the work isn’t going to stick around long. These days, it’s what’s inside that counts.”

  “Yeah. What’s inside your blouse!”

  They laughed again.

  “So Remi isn’t interested in anyone? He’s still eligible?”

  “Looks like it. My spies in Avocado haven’t had anything to report.”

  “There’s no one from Avocado here, right?” someone exclaimed suddenly.

  Kugy quickly turned toward the wall. “Avocado” was the advertising world’s nickname for AdVocaDo. Kugy thanked her lucky stars she was new. Nobody there knew who she was.

  “It wouldn’t matter even if he did have a girlfriend. Before the wedding vows are said, anything is fair game!”

  “Who cares about wedding vows these days? Before the death rites are read, anything is fair game!” The woman who said this laughed.

  “Dirty girl!”

  Just as it was her turn to enter a stall, Kugy decided to slip away. The competition for Remigius Aditya’s attentions was fierce, and things were heating up too much for her liking. She never would have guessed the man was so popular. After seeing how sought after Remi was, Kugy didn’t know whether to feel lucky or cursed. If those women knew she was going out to eat with Remi in the next five minutes, she wasn’t sure she would have made it out of there in one piece.

  Kugy had just polished off a plate of fried rice, and her mouth was now watering at the slice of toast Remi had ordered for himself. “I want some, too,” she said as she looked around for a waiter.

  “You’re one hell of an eater. But where does it all go? How can all that food fit inside that tiny body?” Remi shook his head.

  “Intestines. Everywhere,” Kugy joked. “If you sliced open my hand, you’d find intestines there, too.” Before long, she had placed an order for toast and a mug of hot chocolate.

  “Other women must be jealous,” Remi commented.

  Kugy burst into laughter. “Tonight I can say with all certainty that you’re right. But it has nothing to do with my eating. It’s”—she tried to suppress her laughter—“my eating companion they’re jealous about.”

  Remi frowned. “What do you mean?”

  “I’ve just learned I’m eati
ng with the most eligible bachelor in town! Almost every woman at that event was showering you with adoration and fighting over you!” Kugy chuckled. “There was even a sorority gathering in the ladies’ room discussing you!”

  Remi smiled and looked away. “Oh, whatever. It’s nothing,” he said with a wave of his hand.

  “Well, of course,” Kugy answered. “It’s just funny, that’s all. It seems like I’m the only one who doesn’t realize what”—she hesitated, wondering whether she should continue—“what a valuable opportunity I have here.” She took a deep breath. “At least, in their eyes,” she added quickly.

  Remi gave Kugy a look—the same look he had given her a couple of weeks ago in his car, when he had given her the paper boat. And once again she felt nervous.

  “I’m happy you don’t,” said Remi softly. “This way, you can just be yourself. So can I. And I think that’s been the most enjoyable thing about us spending time together.”

  Kugy swallowed. “I agree. It’s best when you can be yourself,” she answered, not knowing what else to say.

  Remi sipped his hot tea and said lightly, “What they don’t know is that I’m the one who has the valuable opportunity.”

  Just then, Kugy’s toast arrived. She began eating with gusto, partly because she was still hungry and partly because she was trying to compensate for how awkward she felt. She was beginning to feel something wasn’t quite right about all this. Not about Remi. And not about herself.

  November 2002

  Keenan sat in the bale, leaning against a wooden pillar. How many months had he spent in that exact spot? But nothing was the same anymore. Bali wasn’t the same anymore.

  The bomb that had exploded in Kuta a month ago had done more than just physical damage. It was as if a smoky haze still lingered in the air, casting a spell over this happy island and turning it into an island of fear. Everyone was talking about what lay in store—the dark times ahead.

  Even though no one in the family had been hurt—no one lived in Kuta—a sense of mournfulness was present in that big house nonetheless. Nobody was safe from its spell, including Keenan. The only difference was that Keenan had been experiencing a darkness in his soul even before the bomb had gone off.