Starting At Zero

by Jimi Hendrix

  SPAT OUT THE WASTE AND WALKED

  UPON THE NEW DAY.

  I see miracles every day now. I used to be aware of them maybe once or twice a week, but some are so drastic that I couldn’t explain them to a person or I’d probably be locked up by this time. One of these days I’ll finally release all that out, but I’m not going to say anything about it until a wide range of people see it. It’s a universal thought; it’s not a black and white thing, or a green and gold thing ...

  People are frightened to find out the full power of the mind. At the moment, people use only a minute part of their minds, and there’s so much more scope. At one time man could see right around the world with his third eye. That was something that’s always been there. If we could only redevelop those old skills.

  I think the way things are going right now, maturity, that’s going to take time. But spirituality and things in the head, they’re always there. I mean, it gets better and better all the time. I’m always having visions, and I know it’s building up to something really major. It’s out of what’s directing me. What I was here in the first place to do.

  {JIMI CONTINUED RECORDING AT ELECTRIC LADY STUDIOS THROUGHOUT AUGUST. THE STUDIO WAS OFFICIALLY OPENED ON AUGUST 26.}

  New York is killing me at the moment. It’s positively claustrophobic! Things go so fast you might as well step on a roller coaster each time you move outside your door. One day I saw a soldier in the street and said, “Hey, how are you?” He just stared at me and said, “Hey, man, are you for real?” He was bringing himself down because he was so full of hate.

  I BELIEVE YOU HAVE TO LIVE AND LIVE AGAIN until you have got all the evil and hatred out of your soul. Your body is as unimportant as one fish in the sea compared with your soul. But there are still some hardheads who don’t give themselves a chance to develop in the brain, or to let the soul develop or the emotions. You’ve got to gentle these people along for a while until they are clued in on the scene. With enough love and faith, they can find themselves again.

  There’s no bad people or good people; it’s actually all lost and found. That’s what it all boils down to. There’s a lot of lost people around, and there are a few chosen people that are here to help get these people out of this certain sleepiness that they are in. There’s going to be sacrifices. You have to go down into a really bad scene before you can come up with light again. It’s like death and rebirth. After you’ve gone through all of the hell of dying, you’ve got to find out and face the facts to start a nationwide rebirth.

  The whole past is going towards a higher way of thinking. There’ll be a day when houses will be made of diamonds and emeralds. Bullets’ll be fairy tales. There’ll be a renaissance from bad to completely clear and pure and good – from lost to found.

  TRUMPETS AND VIOLINS I CAN HEAR IN THE DISTANCE

  I THINK THEY’RE CALLING OUR NAMES.

  MAYBE NOW, YOU CAN’T HEAR THEM, BUT YOU WILL

  IF YOU JUST TAKE HOLD OF MY HAND.

  I attribute my success to God. It all comes from God. I go by message, and I’m really a messenger of God. My name is nothing but a distraction. Already this idea of living today is magic. I’m working on music to be completely, utterly a magical science, where it’s all pure positive. The more doubts and negatives you knock out of anything, the heavier it gets and the clearer it gets, and the deeper it gets into whoever’s around it. It’s contagious. Bach and all those cats, they went in there, and they caught a whole lot of hell.

  The deeper you get into it, the more sacrifices you have to make. It means I’m going to have to strip myself of my identity, because this isn’t my only identity. Really I’m just an actor. The only difference between me and those cats in Hollywood is that I write my own script. Someone is going to have to go back to his childhood and think about what they really felt, really wanted before the fingerprints of their fathers and mothers got a hold of them, or before the smudges of school or progress ...

  {ON AUGUST 30, 1970, JIMI RETURNED TO GREAT BRITAIN TO PLAY AT THE ISLE OF WIGHT FESTIVAL, HIS FIRST APPEARANCE IN ENGLAND IN ONE AND A HALF YEARS.}

  It’s nice to be back. I’ve been away from this country and Europe for such a long time. But the band has been committed to so many tours and college gigs in the States that it was utterly impossible for us to come over. Believe me, we wanted to! We’d mention that we’d like to come back to Britain to play, but our business people would tell us, “You’re nothing over there in Britain at the moment. Besides, you’ve got this booking in Boston ...”

  We received a lot of STATIC in New York, a lot of aggravation in New York. So I’ve been doing like Yogi Bear, I’ve been hibernating. I just tried to do the gigs and stay quiet for a while. I’ve been going through certain changes. I guess it’s something else for people to talk about.

  While I was doing my vanishing act in the States, I got this feeling that I was completely blown out of England. I thought maybe they didn’t want me anymore, because they had a nice set of bands. Maybe they were saying, “Oh, we’ve had Hendrix, yeah, he was okay.” I really didn’t think we’d have any drawing power.

  I’m so very nervous about the Isle of Wight, I can’t believe it. I really hate waiting around like this. I think it would be better if I’d come and mingled, took a sleeping bag with me and mixed with the crowds to identify with it all. It would be so much better than all this, but there are the usual problems. If I do things like that the people keep coming up to me saying, “Look, it’s him,” and, “C’mon, c’mon” and all that, prodding me.

  I’m just a little bit worried now because I sound a teeny bit like a frog. Last night we were playing so loud that I was shouting on my tiptoes. I felt like my kneecaps were up in my chest nearly. I get kind of tense before a show. I like to be left alone to think. I have to think myself into my act. I can’t just turn on.

  My road manager tries to keep the dressing room free from people, and if people come in I find a corner somewhere else. So right now I just feel kind of nervous, but I think it will be all right, because now we’re going to go on and do our little gig. Mitch will be playing drums and Billy will be playing bass and I’ll be playing GUITAR! You know, instead of up there screaming.

  Most of the time we play a whole vacuum, I mean a wall of sound, a wall of feeling. That’s what we try to get across, you know what I mean? Shhheeeooo! We haven’t been to sleep for two days. I’m tired, and I don’t have much time.

  The Isle of Wight might be the last or second to the last before I form my new big band. If the kids really enjoy it, then I might carry on a little longer. But I will only carry on that way if I am useful. You have got to have a purpose in life. But I’m not here to talk, I’m here to play. I want to show them all over again what it’s all about.

  I’m happy. It’s going to be good.

  “Yeah! Thank you very much for showin’, man.

  You’re all very beautiful and outasight.

  And thanks for waiting. It has been a long time, hasn’t it ...

  Oh yes, somebody wants the people in the front row to sit down.

  I think it’s probably from the hills.

  Don’t forget you can’t fly off the top of those hills.

  Don’t forget that.”

  Is the Isle of Wight the last of the big festivals?

  I don’t know why they’re always trying to kill the festivals. The Isle of Wight was great. It’s a fantastic place to have a show because it brings the kids together from not only the British Isles but also the whole of the Continent.

  There were problems with some of the crowd.

  You’re going to get that with five hundred thousand people. That’s way larger than the average city, and every city in the world always has a gang, the so-called outcasts. So you’re going to have gate-crashers, you’re going to have the other side of everything.

  People were demanding that the music be free.

  Well, they learned that from the papers. They didn’t do all that kind of mess with
Monterey. Sometimes I feel we should do a free concert. I see the prices that the kids pay to see us, and it’s just ridiculous.

  What is the reason for the new, subdued Jimi Hendrix?

  I felt maybe too many people were coming to see me and not enough to listen to me. My nature changed as well. I just hid for a bit, and now I’m emerging as me. I suppose I’m growing up a bit. I feel as though I get little sparks of maturity every now and then.

  Do you ever see yourself settling down?

  I couldn’t even think of a place where I’d like to live for the rest of my life, but I’d like to settle someplace eventually. Sometimes I am all alone and I say, “What are you doing here dressed up in satin shirts and pants?” I’ve got this feeling to have a proper home. I like the idea of getting married, just someone who I could love, though one can never tell if the time is right. With music there’s no time for anything else. I’m already married to my music.

  So marriage is not an option?

  Marriage is a bit risky now. I’d really hate to get hurt. That would completely blow my mind. But I must admit I’d like to meet a quiet little girl now, probably one from the country, someone who doesn’t know anything about me and my reputation. One day I want to become a parent. Now that is what the world is all about. Having kids. Like planting flowers.

  How do you relax?

  I daydream, maybe paint landscapes, read a little. I’ve always loved painting. In fact it was my first love when I was a child. I used to paint a picture of, say, a really pretty mountain, then write about four lines of poetry about it. I don’t hardly get a chance to paint now.

  What plans do you have now?

  I’d like to see as many places as I can and play in as many atmospheres as I can. Your home isn’t America, it’s the Earth. I am planning a major world tour, either before or just after Christmas. I want to go to Japan and Australia. We also want to come back to England and do one big concert at each of the major cities. Jimi Hendrix at the Oval! I’d like to do Stonehenge, for the vibes. In fact, I want the group to work all over the place. I want to turn the world on. Music and sound waves are cosmic when they’re flying from one side to another.

  Any personal ambitions?

  I’d like to have my own country, an oasis for the gypsy- minded people. My goal is to erase all boundaries from the world. I’d like to take part in changing reality. You have to set some heavy goals to keep yourself going. As long as I know there are people out there who aren’t fully together, I can’t withdraw to lesser goals.

  Do you have enough money to live comfortably?

  Ah, I don’t think so. Because I want to wake up in the morning and just roll out of my bed into an indoor swimming pool and then swim to the breakfast table, come up for air and maybe get a drink of orange juice, and then swim into the bathroom and, you know ... have a shave.

  You want to live luxuriously?

  Is that luxurious? No! I was thinking about a tent, maybe, overhanging a mountain stream.

  {THE CRY OF LOVE BAND PLAYED SIX MORE CONCERTS IN EUROPE, DURING WHICH BILLY COX BECAME SERIOUSLY ILL WHEN LSD WAS SLIPPED INTO SOMETHING HE WAS DRINKING. THE LAST SHOW WAS ON SEPTEMBER 6, 1970, AT THE VIOLENCE-BESOTTED ISLE OF FEHMARN LOVE AND PEACE FESTIVAL IN GERMANY.}

  Billy Cox has split, so I don’t know what to do next. I don’t know what my music will be like. It’s really hard to know what people want around here sometimes. I’m going to just go on and do what I feel, but I can’t feel anything right now because there’s a few things that’s just happened. So I just have to lay back and think about it all. It’s got to be quiet for a while.

  I’m so tired of everything. I lose myself, I can’t play anymore. I’ve been working very hard for three years. I sacrifice part of my soul every time I play. Certain things recharge me in an instant. I might get worn out in an instant too. It all depends.

  IT WASN’T TOO LONG AGO,

  BUT IT FEELS LIKE YEARS AGO SINCE

  I FELT THE WARM HELLO OF THE SUN.

  LATELY THINGS SEEM A LITTLE COLDER,

  THE WIND, IT SEEMS TO GET A LITTLE BOLDER,

  THE EAGLE FLYING,

  NOW IT’S ON THE RUN – BUT THEN AGAIN

  IT’S ALL IN MY MIND.

  Direction is the hardest thing for me to find now. I can’t even try and think how this life has affected me. Somehow I must have changed, but I can’t know how. That’s the problem. I’ve turned full circle. I’m right back where I started. I’ve given this era of music everything, but I still sound the same and I can’t think of anything new to add to it in its present state. Sometimes I can’t stand to hear myself because it sounds like everyone else, and I don’t want to be in that rat race.

  The trouble is that people won’t let me change. I tried a couple of years back, but it didn’t work then either. You’re still supposed to entertain, no matter what’s happening to you as a musician. I wrote Foxy Lady so long ago by now she’s going to have three kids. We’ll dedicate it to her children, because she’s worn out with it.

  PURPLE HAZE – BEYOND INSANE.

  IS IT PLEASURE OR IS IT PAIN?

  DOWN ON THE CEILING

  LOOKING UP AT THE BED,

  SEE MY BODY PAINTED

  BLUE AND RED.

  I still can’t figure out what directions my writing is going at the moment, but it’ll find a way. All I write is what I feel, that’s all. And I don’t really round it off too good. It’s almost naked. The words are so bland that nobody can get into them, and when we play – flip around and flash around – people just see what their eyes see, and forget about their ears.

  I’m trying to do too many things at the same time, which is my nature. I just hate to be in one corner. I hate to be put as only a guitar player or only a songwriter or only a tap dancer! I like to move around. I’ve got to try something else. I’d like to get something together, like with Handel and Bach and Muddy Waters and flamenco – that type of thing. If I could get that sound, if I could get that sound, I’d be happy.

  I think I’m a better guitarist than I was, but I never have been really good. Every year, like my writing, it slips further and further away. The music I might hear I can’t get on the guitar. It’s a thing of just laying around daydreaming or something. You’re hearing all this music, and you just can’t get it on the guitar.

  As a matter of fact, if you pick up your guitar and try to play, it spoils the whole thing. I think of tunes, I think of riffs. I can hum them. Then there’s another melody comes into my head and then a bass melody and then another one. On guitar, I just can’t get them out. I can’t play guitar well enough to get all this music together.

  I want to be a good writer, and I’d like to be a good guitar player. I’ve learned a lot, but I’ve got to learn more about music because there’s a lot in this hair of mine that’s got to get out. There’s so many songs I wrote that we haven’t done yet, that we’ll probably never do.

  I WON’T BE DOING MANY LIVE GIGS because I’m going to develop the sound and then put a film out with it. In five years, I want to write some plays and some books. I want to write mythology stories set to music, based on a planetary thing and my imagination. It wouldn’t be like classical music, but I’d use strings and harps, with extreme and opposite musical textures, even greater contrasts than Holst’s Planets.

  Then I would like to write a story for the stage and compose the music for it. Take Greek mythology, for example, or your old stories about the Vikings and Asgard. I’d like to present that on stage with lights and lots of sound. Or perhaps a space war between Neptune and Uranus.

  MY INITIAL SUCCESS was a step in the right direction, but it was only a step. Now I plan to get into many other things. I’d like to take a six-month break and go to a school of music. I want to learn to read music, be a model student and study and think. I’m tired of trying to write stuff down and finding I can’t. I want a big band. I don’t mean three harps and fourteen violins, I mean a big band full of competent musicians that I can
conduct and write for.

  I want to be part of a big new musical expansion. That’s why I have to find a new outlet for my music. We are going to stand still for a while and gather everything we’ve learned musically in the last 30 years, and we are going to blend all the ideas that worked into a new form of classical music. It’s going to be something that will open up a new sense in people’s minds.

  I dig Strauss and Wagner, those cats are good, and I think that they are going to form the background of my music. Floating in the sky above it will be the blues – I’ve still got plenty of blues – and then there will be western sky music and sweet opium music (you’ll have to bring your own opium!), and these will be mixed together to form one. And with this music we will paint pictures of earth and space, so that the listener can be taken somewhere. You have to give people something to dream on.

  WHERE IS HE COMING FROM?

  FROM HEAVEN WHERE A MILLION WORLDS ARE ONE

  WHERE IS HE GOING TO? HE’S GOING TO MAKE

  CONTACT WITH THE LIVING AND THE DEAD.

  IT SEEMS TO ME LIKE MUSIC GOES IN A BIG CYCLE. The circle is completed and I’m starting back already. My goal is to be one with the music. I just dedicate my whole life to this art. You have to forget about what other people say, when you’re supposed to die, or when you’re supposed to be living. You have to forget about all these things. You have to go on and be crazy.

  Craziness is like heaven. Once you reach that point where you don’t give a damn what everybody else is saying, you’re going towards heaven. The more you get into it, they’re going to say, “Damn, that cat’s really flipped out. Oh, he’s gone now.” That’s what they call craziness. But if you’re producing and creating, you’re getting closer to your own heaven.

  When the last American tour finished I just wanted to go away and forget everything. I just wanted to record and see if I could write something. Then I started thinking. Thinking about the future. Thinking that this era of music sparked off by the Beatles has come to an end. Something new has got to come, and Jimi Hendrix will be there.