by Amy Andrews
Beth’s head was spinning by the time they called it a day four hours later. She had lists of things she needed to organise and follow up. Extra lighting, sufficient of instruments and regular practice days were the most pressing.
Having the theatre fitted with closed-circuit cameras was also something that needed to be sorted out sooner rather than later. Gabe had insisted on the importance of such a set-up. On D-day the tearoom, which would act as the main hub for superfluous staff, would have live footage relayed to its screens so everyone could keep abreast of the progress.
Beth knew that a lot of modern theatres were being built with these systems already in place. One of the newer south-side hospitals had all its theatres fitted out and she made a note to talk to the NUM involved about the intricacies of the system.
They agreed to meet every Saturday as a team and the surgeons would practise the exact techniques both alone and together in addition to the whole team sessions. Beth felt a bit like she was training for an Olympic event except there were more than medals at stake. Two precious lives depended on them. Penny was right—how did Gabe cope with the pressure?
‘We’re all going to the pub for lunch,’ Kerry said as she popped her head into Beth’s office. ‘Join us?’
Lunch with Gabe? Tea had been bad enough. ‘I want to get some of this organised,’ Beth said waving her list in the air and picking up the phone.
‘Oh, come on, Beth,’ Kerry cajoled. ‘You work too hard. Have lunch and then come back afterwards if you want.’
Beth looked at the pleading look on her friend’s face. They’d known each other for a long time. ‘I’ll join you later,’ she fobbed her off, knowing she wouldn’t be doing anything of the sort. ‘You going to Barney’s?’
Kerry nodded. ‘You’d better or I’m going to send Gabe over to drag you here.’
‘What am I going to do?’ Gabe asked, popping his head in too.
‘Beth’s passing on lunch.’
Gabe looked at Beth and then back at Kerry. ‘Leave it with me. Save us both a space.’
‘No,’ Beth said, when she’d given Kerry enough time to be out of ear shot.
Gabe sighed. ‘You know, Penny was right. We do need to be a well-oiled team. This operation is a hugely stressful event. Socialising will help build rapport and it gives us another forum to discuss the operation. Maybe talk about things we hadn’t thought about.’
‘Take notes,’ she said, and started to dial a number.
Gabe entered her office and pushed the call cut-off button.
‘Dr Fallon…’ Beth gaped.
‘Sister Rogers. I’m afraid I’m going to have to insist. Debriefing is mandatory.’
Beth tried to ignore how her skin erupted with goose bumps at his insistence. His accent slid over her like silk and she felt a pull down low in her abdomen.
They glared at each other for a few moments. Beth looked at his finger still firmly in place. This was ludicrous. There was a huge group of them, she didn’t have to talk to him at all.
‘Let me make a few phone calls and then I’ll join you,’ she finally acquiesced.
Gabe smiled at her as he lifted his finger. ‘Thank you.’ He strolled towards the door. ‘If you’re not at Barney’s in thirty minutes, I’m going to take Kerry up on her suggestion.’
Beth swallowed as his silky threat tantalised more than it terrorised.
Twenty-five minutes later Beth stopped at the kerb, waiting for the green man. She looked to her right. The city skyscrapers loomed nearby. The General had been around for over a century and whoever had chosen this spot had done well. It was prize real estate, with its city views and proximity to the hustle and bustle of downtown Brisbane.
The light changed and Beth crossed the busy road, heading towards the garish neon sign that announced the pub’s location. Barney’s was a popular hangout for the hospital staff, being situated as it was directly opposite the General.
She stepped into the jovial atmosphere and moments later squinted into the dark recesses as her eyes adjusted from the bright sunshine outside.
‘I was just about to come and get you.’
Beth wasn’t expecting the sexy low threat growled in upper-crust English so close to her ear and her skin tingled where Gabe’s breath fanned her skin.
‘We’ve ordered fish and chips,’ he said, ushering her along with him as he balanced three beers. ‘What do you want to drink?’ he asked, as everyone greeted her and he pulled out her chair.
‘Um…’ Beth was still catching her breath from his earlier statement. ‘Chardonnay, please.’
She listened, slightly dazed, as the conversation flowed around her. Any chance she had of forming coherent chatter died as Gabe joined her, plonking her wine on the table in front of her and sitting down next to her.
He joined in the flow easily, unlike Beth who had developed a sudden case of muteness as her awareness of him rose to excruciating levels.
He was dressed as Gabe. Laid-back Gabe. Not the cool professional he’d been an hour ago, dressed in scrubs and a cap, concentrating and focused on the Fisher case, calling her Sister Rogers. He was in jeans and a polo shirt like he’d been the first time they’d met. His caramel hair looked like it had been carelessly finger-combed, making him look impossibly young, and he was smiling at her. A lot. And calling her Beth.
Oh, god! Despite telling herself not to, despite not wanting to, she had a thing for him. She took a gulp of her drink. How embarrassing. Hadn’t she embarrassed herself enough in front of him? Not content to just sleep with him after five minutes’ acquaintance, she’d also sobbed like a baby in his arms. Beth took another gulp of her wine. Coming here today had been a mistake.
She was grateful when the meal arrived and people concentrated on eating instead of talking.
‘So,’ Gabe said, his voice low. ‘I enjoyed my time with your family the other night.’
Beth cringed, thinking about how his surprise invitation had thrown her and how uncomfortable she’d felt sitting next to him. She’d been less than polite. ‘John and Penny enjoyed your company,’ she murmured, trying to make amends for her behaviour.
‘Only John and Penny?’ Gabe teased.
Beth glanced up from her meal at him and saw his easy grin. She ignored him, returning her attentions to her beer-battered fish. His ego didn’t need any massaging.
‘How old were you when the Winters fostered you?’ Gabe asked.
Beth stopped in mid-chew. ‘Fifteen,’ she said stiffly.
Gabe noted her reticence. ‘I’m sorry. I’m prying. You don’t like to talk about it.’
Beth placed her cutlery on her plate carefully. ‘Not at all. I just don’t see the point in discussing it.’
Gabe laughed. ‘It’s called conversation, Beth. You know, social interaction? Getting to know each other? We seemed to have put the cart before the horse and I thought it might be nice to get to know each other beyond the…physical.’
His voice lowered on the last word and she shivered. Like she needed reminding of their uninhibited beginning. Talking about her past seemed preferable to hushed references of their night together. ‘It’s a long story. My mother died when I was six—’
‘I’m sorry,’ Gabe interjected.
Beth shrugged. It wasn’t as if she remembered her. The only images of her mother she could recall had come from battered old photos. ‘I didn’t really know her.’ Except that wasn’t entirely true. Vague, elusive sensations of being hugged and rocked and loved were never far away.
Maybe if her mother hadn’t died, the rest of her life wouldn’t have gone to hell. And her father would never have insisted she adopt the baby out. But, then, if she’d lived there’d have been no catalyst for the dramatic downward spiral and life would have been very different. Beth probably wouldn’t have found herself in the predicament in the first place.
‘My father…Things were bad after. He threw himself into his work, shut me out. I think it was too painful to acknowledge me.
He was distant and the times he wasn’t he was harsh and critical. He remarried. My stepmother…well, she wasn’t exactly…kid friendly. I rebelled in my teenage years. We fought a lot. The stricter he got, the more I rebelled. After years of ignoring me he didn’t know how to handle me.’
Gabe listened to her tale of woe and could draw eerie parallels with his own life. He was beginning to see why Beth was so reserved, so tightly in control of her actions. Her childhood had been fraught. He remembered how his own parental circumstances had buffeted his life and the constant state of anxiety he’d lived in for such a long time.
‘I ran away.’ She shut her eyes as the awful isolation and dread of life on the streets revisited her. It had been a harrowing time. She opened her eyes, stirring from the memories, realising she’d given away more than she’d meant to. ‘Anyway, I eventually wound up in the foster-care system. And got lucky.’
Gabe wasn’t fooled by her quick wrap-up. Somewhere there was a chunk of the story missing. Could it be worse than what he’d already heard? What had happened to her after she’d run away? Had she got into drugs or crime or other things that street kids became embroiled in?
‘You certainly did,’ he agreed, knowing he’d pushed too much for one day.
But there was more to the Beth Rogers story, of that he was sure. Having this glimpse into her life seemed to throw up more questions. Her uncharacteristic act of sleeping with him seemed even more peculiar, knowing what he now knew. Was there an even bigger demon in her past?
They ate in silence for a few moments. Low conversation buzzed around them. As the silence stretched between them Beth’s awareness of him trebled. At least conversation kept her mind off the sensations stroking her skin.
She took a swig of Dutch courage and looked at him. ‘What about you, Gabe? What was it like growing up with the great Harlon Fallon?’
‘It wasn’t dull.’
Beth noted his clipped reply and frowned as a memory flashed a warning light in her head. Oh, God! Open mouth, insert foot. ‘Damn. Sorry, Gabe. He died just recently, didn’t he?’
Gabe felt the heaviness in his chest that had been with him since his father’s death intensify. ‘A few months ago.’ He nodded.
His voice sounded so bleak and Beth saw the same sadness she’d caught a brief glimpse of that first night. So…he had been grieving too. ‘Look, sorry, forget it. I didn’t mean to pry either.’
Gabe gave her a sad smile. ‘It’s OK, Beth. I don’t mind talking about it.’ He forked a chip into his mouth and took a swallow of his beer. ‘My parents divorced when I was twelve. Dad was never around and I guess Mum got sick of being a single parent. They argued a lot. Mum accused him of loving his job more than us.’
‘Ouch.’
Gabe nodded. ‘Unfortunately, Dad didn’t disabuse her of it. She married again shortly after. Like you, my step-father and I never really saw eye to eye.’
So Gabe had his demons too. Maybe that explained her rash attraction to him that fateful night? Maybe she’d recognised a kindred spirit, had identified with his grief and been drawn to him? She looked down at her empty plate. ‘I think it takes someone much stronger than a mere child to accept someone new into the picture.’
He nodded. ‘I guess I felt it was betraying my father to accept Ronald. We argued a lot. I’m afraid I wasn’t very nice.’
Beth remembered back to her own tumultuous teens. She hadn’t been nice either. In fact, she’d gone off the rails big time. Being emotionally isolated from her father, she’d felt acutely the loss of the mother she’d never even really known. Was it any wonder she’d wound up pregnant when she’d been so hungry for some love and attention.
‘Did you go live with your dad?’
Gabe snorted. ‘Dad didn’t have time for anyone, never mind a sullen teenager.’
Poor Gabe. The bitterness she heard in his simple statement was achingly familiar to her. Gabe had obviously felt as let down by his parents as she had by hers.
‘So you didn’t really get on with your dad either? Did you reconcile before he died?’
‘I don’t know about reconcile. I lived with him when I went to med school in London. He was a complex man. I don’t think he’d have let me in even if he’d lived to be a hundred. But I think he was…proud of me…at the end.’
‘I’m sure he was,’ Beth murmured. She took another sip of her drink, leaving Gabe alone with his memories for a minute.
‘Well, you must have been the envy of all your fellow students. Living with the great Harlon Fallon. You must have learnt so much from him.’
‘Oh, yeah. I learnt single-mindedness. That any distractions to your career were to be avoided at all costs. That you could be a great doctor but you couldn’t be a great father or a great man as well, and you had to make the choice early on. That success comes at a cost to your family.’
Beth stopped chewing. It sounded so bleak. At least the Winterses had shown her that children, even surly teenagers, needed love and had showered her with it. Thankfully she’d had a chance to be a part of a real family. A chance to start over. ‘That sounds dreadful.’
Gabe smiled down at her. ‘No. It wasn’t that bad. I thank him actually. My father may not have been the warm and fuzzy type but in his own way he was looking out for me. He was right—doctors have one of the highest divorce rates of all professions. Surgeons are worse. Neurosurgeons worse again. None of the marriages of my friends who are surgeons have made it past a couple of years.
‘Being a product of divorce has helped me prioritise in my life. I don’t think you can have the type of career I want and have a family also. That’s just not fair to them.’
Beth looked into his steady green gaze, his accent oozing rivers of sensation all over her, and felt completely horrified. She had a thing for a guy who’d been raised by a robot! Harlon Fallon may have been a brilliant physician, taught his son focus and the importance of a career, but had he ever put his arms around Gabe and told him that he loved him?
She felt absurdly like doing that just now. Not the love thing. But just hugging him. Hugging the lost little boy somewhere inside who just wanted his father to love him. Maybe it was the loneliness of her early years or more likely the unrequited mother in her, but she sincerely hoped that anyone, regardless of what they did for a job, could see that family was more important than anything. Above career. Above accolades. Even above Nobel Prizes.
At least, despite all evidence of her past, she still believed that a happily-ever-after was out there for everyone. Who knew? Maybe it was still out there for her. If she could ever forgive herself enough to love. And it could still be out there for Gabe too. As long as he didn’t become a chip off the old block.
CHAPTER FOUR
MONDAY morning the majority of the team gathered in a clinical support office on the tenth floor for the first case conference. Subsequent meetings would only involve the main players but Gabe had wanted everyone involved to meet the Fishers at least once. He wanted them to see that through all the hype, all the media coverage, this was what it was about. Two little girls. A family. He wanted to put a human face to the mammoth task that lay ahead of them.
The large room was dominated by a huge oval table and a magnificent view of the Brisbane skyline but when June Fisher pushed the pram through the doors, all eyes were on Bridie and Brooke. Those who hadn’t seen the girls before, including Beth, stared in awe. They were truly a sight to behold.
Gabe introduced the team and Beth was impressed he’d remembered everyone’s name even down to Tom the orderly.
‘Hi.’ Beth smiled at June, holding out her hand as Gabe got to her. ‘I’m Beth Rogers. I’m the nurse unit manager of the operating theatres.’ June and Scott shook Beth’s hand. ‘If you have any questions at all as we go along this morning, make sure you let us know. You two are as much a part of this team as anyone else.’
‘Thank you,’ June murmured.
Beth’s gaze was continually drawn to the twins as the
surgeons discussed the logistics of the case with their parents. Bridie was asleep but Brooke babbled away as she sucked furiously on a rattle. How Bridie slept Beth had no idea. Her sister’s vocalising filled the whole room and the surgeons kept stopping in mid-sentence to smile at the happy, normal noises coming from a far from normal child.
The longer she spent in the meeting, listening to all the complex issues, the more she admired the Fishers resilience. There’d been a lot of gossip in the hospital and reports in the media that the Fishers had been irresponsible and should have had the twins terminated when their condition had become evident.
But looking at the two dear little girls Beth knew it couldn’t have been that clear cut for Scott and June. Having given up a child herself, Beth knew the terrible gut wrench of such decisions. She didn’t envy them their position or judge them for their choice. And none of it mattered now anyway. Bridie and Brooke were here. That was all that mattered.
Bridie started to stir and Brooke automatically reached back to touch her sister. Beth felt a lump in her throat as she watched the innate gesture of comfort. She thought about her relationship with Rilla and Hailey. About their sisterly bond and how strong it was. They had to pull both the girls through. After such a close tie, how could either be whole without the other?
Gabe sat opposite and she looked up to find his gaze on her. He was talking to the vascular guys and quickly turned his attention back to them but he’d definitely been watching her. Goose-bumps pricked her skin as his voice washed over her, and Beth found herself wishing they’d started off on a different footing.
It still felt awkward to be around him. She knew—she hoped—that with time and distance it would ease, but the Fisher case was throwing them very much together, not giving her the space she needed to look at him with indifference.
Scott and June departed with the girls half an hour into the meeting, along with most of the team. Beth stayed on and took necessary notes as they pertained to her and her staff’s role, conscious as ever of Gabe.