The Bonding

by Hansen, Victoria

  “Oooh,” Ilandra said softly, “are you the mysterious foreign woman who saved all Koral from certain destruction?”

  “Gods, is that what people are saying?” Kiri rolled her eyes. “I'm a soldier, I fight. It's my job, nothing more.

  “No, I heard this story too.” Krissy piped up, “our own chief of magical law enforcement was there with his soooo pretty swordmaster Jarrell.”

  “That is true,” Kiri told them, “unfortunately, Jarrell did not survive. Only Davin and I made it back alive, mostly due to his quick thinking.”

  “They also say,” Juleena drawled, “that he has hardly left your side since then.”

  “What a great adventure!” Krissy added.

  “If this is adventure,” Kiri said dryly, “I'll pass. The only good thing about the whole experience has been getting to know Davin. The rest has been nothing but danger and crisis and pain. Don't wish for adventure, girls. It comes at too high a price.”

  “That's good advice,” Dori told them. “Now, let's begin our training. The first skill is to connect with your magic on purpose. Close your eyes and imagine a bright golden light in the vicinity of your heart. It's yours. It belongs to you. You control it.

  Open yourself to the light and let it fill you.”

  Kiri was glad for the opportunity, at least, to close her eyes.

  * * *

  The three hours of magic class actually passed relatively quickly. It was interesting to learn to use an ability she had never known she possessed. It was also not as exhausting as she had feared. In fact, it seemed the more time she spent delving into her magic, the more energized she became. Late in the class, Kiri had been attempting to light a candle using only her mind, when her magic surged uncomfortably, just as it had done the previous day. Without Davin there to distract her, the pulsing made her nauseous and she gagged several times. Disgusted, Juleena swept out saying she couldn't learn any more that day.

  “Stay,” Dori told her sharply. “You are not in charge here. This could happen to any of you, and you need to know how to deal with it.”

  Sourly, Juleena sat. Dori took Kiri's hand in hers and looked closely into her eyes.

  “You are in control. You do not have to let it control you. Picture the golden light.” Kiri squeezed her eyes and tried to obey. She could see it inside her, swelling, pulsing. She swallowed hard. “Tell it to stop.”

  “Stop,” Kiri said aloud.

  “Say it like you mean it, like you know you're in control.

  “Stop!” Kiri shouted and to her amazement the pulsing stilled.

  “There, did you all see that? You control your magic. Don't let it control you. Excellent lesson everyone. You are dismissed for today.”

  The other girls crowded around Kiri.

  “Are you all right? Ilandra asked softly.

  “I think I will be. Just give me a minute to catch my breath. That was…uncomfortable.”

  “What happened to your face?” Juleena asked rudely.

  Kiri leveled a stony gaze on the young woman. “Not that it's any of your business, little girl, but I'm a convicted murderer. You might keep that in mind.”

  Juleena scuttled out the door.

  “Is that true?” asked Krissy, her eyes huge.

  “Yes, but there's more to the story. A person can be convicted, even punished, without being guilty.”

  “So you didn't kill anyone?”

  “Don't be naïve,” Kiri told her bluntly. I've been in battle. I've killed many people.”

  “But battle is different,” Ilandra said softly.

  “Is it? Those men and women are just as dead. I don't see a difference. But I'm tired of killing.” Kiri closed her eyes for a moment. “Listen, girls, I would love to talk to you, but today I'm exhausted. I'm not well. I need to go back to the hospital and rest.”

  “Of course, ma'am.” Krissy said, and Ilandra nodded in agreement.

  “Please, don't call me ma'am,” Kiri smiled. “I'm not THAT old!” Both girls grinned and helped her to her feet.

  Kiri hadn't lied; she was tired, but not as tired as she had been before. Davin didn't seem to have arrived yet to pick her up, so she decided to walk back on her own. It was a short distance, and this would be a great way to start her training again.

  She made it almost halfway before she had to stop, leaning against a building, and catch her breath. Perhaps walking alone was a mistake. I wonder where Davin is, and why he didn't come to meet me.

  As she was contemplating what to do next, a woman sauntered up to her and gave her an insulting look.

  “Can I help you?” Kiri asked wearily.

  “You're that foreign woman aren't you?”

  Kiri took a slow breath, trying to control her irritation. “Astute observation. You are correct. I was not born in Koral. And?”

  “They say you're a hero, that you killed a monster.”

  “I didn't kill it. I neutralized it,” Kiri corrected. “Others finished dispatching it. Look, I don't mean to be rude, but I don't feel much like having a long conversation right now. If you have a point, please get to it.”

  “All right. You are the subject of a great deal of gossip.”

  “I'm sure.” Kiri said coolly, wondering where the hell this was going.

  “Is it true you and Davin Colorian are lovers?”

  Koralians are strange. “I don't see what business it is of yours.”

  “It IS my business. I'm his wife.”

  The world faded to gray and a loud buzzing sounded in Kiri's ears. “You're lying.”

  “Why would I lie? I don't even know you. Davin and I have been married for over ten years, but we're estranged, mostly because I won't tolerate his infidelity. He loves to scoop up sad and unattractive women. He says they're easy to manipulate because they're so grateful for the attention. But I don't think it's fair, after all you've been through, for him to use you this way, so I'm warning you. Stay away from Davin. He'll only break your heart in the end, the way he has so many others.”

  She walked away leaving Kiri breathless with distress. Could it be true? Davin, married? But then how could he have spent so much time alone with her, and no one said anything…or did they? He had told her living together would not be well accepted. Was it, as he had said, because it was too soon, or was it really because he had a wife? And what was wrong with her that only married men desired her? Was it her destiny never to have a lover, a husband of her own, only other women's? Without conscious thought, Kiri began to walk again. She was still in shock when she arrived at the apartment of healers and drifted to the alcove where she had been staying. It's time for me to leave. I'm was well enough. But where would she go. She sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the wall.

  A few moments later, the curtain opened and Kyla entered. “Hello my dear,” she said gently, as though Kiri were a small child.

  Kiri turned to look at her, but said nothing.

  “Have you decided about living arrangements? If not, we have secured an apartment for you, between here and the magic school. You can get to your classes easily each day, and can come here for medical help if you need it. There is also a restaurant on the ground floor of the building, so it will be easy for you to eat.”

  “How will I pay?” Kiri asked. Her voice sounded strange and hollow to her ears. “I have no money, nor do I have a job at this time. What can I do to earn a living?”

  “For now, let us pay for you. Once you have completed your magical training, you will be better able to assess your talents and interests.”

  “You're going to give me money? For what?”

  “Think of it as payment for the job you did…destroying those two creatures should merit some kind of pay don't you think?”

  “Fine. I'll accept it as a salary. Can you take me there now?”

  * * *

  Davin arrived at the apartment of healers about an hour later. He had stopped by the magic school, but had found no one there. Kiri, he thought to himself, had al
ways been too strong for her own good. He hoped she had made it back to the hospital safely. As he walked towards her room, he ran into Soren, Jaya's tall and bald-headed lover. He had never liked the man, but strived to maintain a neutral demeanor for his sister's sake.

  “Kiri's not here,” the healer said abruptly.

  Davin's eyebrows snapped together. “She's not? Where is she?”

  “One of the elders came and took her to an apartment. She's going to live there now.”

  What's going on, baby? “An apartment? I thought she was going to live with me.”

  “Apparently not.”

  “Where is this place?”

  Soren gave the address and Davin turned to leave. The older man grabbed his arm.

  “Make sure she's all right, would you? She didn't look too good when she left.”

  “I will.” Davin assured him. Alarmed, he hurried the short distance to the apartment and pounded up the stairs to the third floor. There, he found the number and knocked. The door opened, but it was Kyla, not Kiri, who looked out at him. He could hear from back in the apartment, the sound of piteous sobs. Kiri, who never cried, who had faced her certain death and his with only a single tear, was weeping as though her heart was broken. Davin attempted to push past the elder but she held him back with a shield of magic.

  “You may not come in,” she told him harshly. “You have harmed this young woman enough already.”

  When are things going to start making sense? “What are you saying? I have to go to her. Kiri! Let me in!”

  “No. You are not going to hurt her again.”

  “My lady,” Davin said, squashing down his growing panic, “I never hurt Kiri. I love her. She needs me. Please, let me go to her.”

  Magic billowed around them, shielding their conversation from any ears but their own. “Never hurt her? You raped her magic and enslaved her with some kind of bonding spell. I suspect she learned that today when she was exploring her magic. She came back from class deeply shaken, and she hasn't stopped crying since then. We both know why. Now get out of here and leave her alone. You will NOT be allowed in.” She slammed the door in his face.

  Can it be true? She might have learned in class that me using her magic without permission is considered rape. Still, that seemed off. He had done it to save her, of course. And Kiri had always been so level headed and strong. But she also had a natural sensitivity to the idea of violation. If she felt he had violated her, it might explain why she didn't want to see him. Face set, Davin grimly headed back to his own apartment, wondering what the hell he was going to do now.

  Chapter 11

  The next two weeks dragged by for Kiri. She was regaining her physical strength due to long hours spent exercising, trying to keep herself from thinking. She faithfully attended her magic class each day, and was making progress, although her magic did tend to surge often. Her attempts to stop those surges were not as successful as they should have been. Perhaps she didn't care enough to squash them properly. In fact, her whole life had lost its promise, and she was afflicted with a great weariness of the soul. What really matters, anyway?

  While pushing her mind and body to the limit kept her moving through the day, night was another matter. After eating her solitary supper in a dark corner of the restaurant, she would return to the small but attractive apartment the elders had provided for her. She tried to read the novels she picked up occasionally at a second hand shop, but they failed to capture her interest. War stories were so inaccurate, reading them merely annoyed her. Love stories were agonizing. Most nights she ended up crying herself to sleep.

  The temptation to go to Davin almost overpowered her. What difference did it make if were married? It was Kiri he loved. But she knew how selfish the thought was. If she loved him, she would want what was best for him, not just for her, and the best thing for him would be to reconcile with that other woman, his wife, not Kiri. Besides, if Davin had really wanted to be with her, wouldn't he have sought her out? After the first night, when Kyla had refused to let him in, he had not even attempted to see her. She could feel him. The magical bond they had forged still connected them. She felt drawn to him, but she would not go.

  There was another problem too. Although Kiri was definitely recovering from her weakness, she still felt ill at odd moments. The healers had warned her there might be residual nausea after the poison purging treatment, but two weeks later seemed excessive. One day, after a particularly harrowing magic class in which she had surged several times, and not been successful in controlling it, she had been forced to run into the water closet and was violently ill.

  When she came out, pale and sweaty and trembling, she asked Dori to be excused from the rest of the lesson and staggered back to the hospital to get herself checked out.

  While she had hoped to find an anonymous stranger to examine her roiling belly, it was Jaya she saw first. Davin's sister leveled her with a dark glare and dragged her into an examining room.

  “What do you want?” Jaya hissed through clenched teeth.

  “That's harsh, Jaya. I'm not feeling well,” Kiri moaned, clutching her roiling belly.

  “If I hadn't sworn an oath, I would just leave you to suffer,” the woman snapped.

  “Maybe someone else…”

  “No.” Jaya shook one finger in Kiri's face. “I have things to say to you, and you had better plan to sit and listen to them.”

  “Fine.” Nausea rolled through Kiri and sweat beaded on her forehead.

  “What the hell is wrong with you?” Jaya demanded.

  “I don't know,” Kiri whined. “That's why I'm here. Is this still from the treatment?”

  Jaya made a face. “No, that wouldn't have lasted beyond the first few days. Did you eat something bad?”

  “Not that I'm aware of.”

  “Sit down. I'm going to scan you.” Jaya said, pressing Kiri onto a chair. Kiri sat and Jaya summoned magic into her hands and ran them over Kiri's belly. “Oh my gods!” she exclaimed, her eyes wide.

  “What?” Kiri demanded. Even a bad answer is an answer.

  “You're pregnant, Kiri.

  Kiri's jaw dropped. She stared at the blonde healer in shock. “No! Oh gods, no, how can it be?”

  “I don't know, but it is. I assume it's Davin's baby?”

  Kiri buried her face in her hands. “Yes,” she whispered, rocking back and forth. “Oh no, it can't be. I'm sorry Jaya. I didn't know. I would never have…I didn't know. I didn't mean to get pregnant. I didn't even think of it.”

  “Some lover you turned out to be.” Jaya said, her voice hard. “First you make Davin fall desperately in love with you, and then you drop him. What the hell kind of game are you playing?”

  Kiri's temper flared. “You're mad at me for leaving Davin? How dare you? I did what was best for him. He shouldn't be sleeping with me. He should get back with his wife.”

  Jaya drew back, startled “What are you talking about? Davin has never been married.”

  Kiri pressed her fingertips into her temples, trying to ease the headache caused by her confusion. “But this woman…she told me…she said she was his wife.”

  “That bitch!” Jaya exploded. “This time she's gone too far. And you!” She rounded on Kiri. “You believed her? Didn't you ask him?”

  “I couldn't,” Kiri cried, the revelation radiating through her like a shockwave.

  “The only way I could actually manage to end this was not to see him at all. I have no strength where he is concerned.”

  Jaya rolled her eyes and explained. “That woman has been plaguing Davin for years. They had a brief affair almost a decade ago, but she has never let go. She torments him, tries to interfere in his life. No one does anything about it because she's crazy. But he was never married to her or anyone else. Never.”

  Cold terror clenched Kiri's heart. “What have I done?”

  “What you have done, my dear,” Jaya sneered, “is to break the heart of a very good man who loved you.”

  K
iri inhaled sharply through her nose. “I have to go to him. Do you know where he is?”

  “Damn right I do. He's in prison, Kiri.”

  Shock had Kiri nearly choking. “What?”

  “For raping you.”

  “He never…he wouldn't,” she sputtered.

  “Of course he wouldn't.” Jaya crossed her arms over her chest. “But the council of elders believes he has been manipulating you with magic, and when he tapped your magic to bring you here, he did it against your will, which constitutes rape. They're meeting today to decide his sentence. The only person who can save him now is you. You had better run.”

  “No,” Kiri said, “Open me a portal.”

  * * *

  Seconds later, Kiri strode into the main chamber of the council of elders, head held high like a queen, like a warrior, her sword strapped to her hip, her long braid hanging over her shoulder.

  She marched down the long aisle between two rows of polished wooden benches, traversing a floor in sparkling, silver stone, until she stood before a low dais, on which four mature individuals sat on throne like chairs with high backs and red velvet cushions. Pale sunlight filtered through high, narrow windows that were little more than arrow slits.

  Kiri bobbed her head once in the direction of the elders, a faint imitation of a bow.

  “Ah, there you are, my dear. We wondered if you would be coming,” Kyla said kindly, “That bad young man will not be able to hurt you anymore. He's going to prison for a very long time.”

  “Yes, I heard. That's why I'm here. I want Davin released immediately, and all charges against him dropped.”

  Kyla's mouth fell open at Kiri's firm demand. From the corner of her eye, she saw Dalwyn nod.

  Miranda spoke, “Kiri, after much investigation, the council has ruled Davin is guilty of magical crimes against you and he was about to be sentenced to prison. Do you have new information you would like to add?”