The Romany Rye

by George Borrow

  CHAPTER XVIII

  MR. PETULENGRO'S DEVICE--THE LEATHERN PURSE--CONSENT TO PURCHASE A HORSE

  As I returned along the road I met Mr. Petulengro and one of hiscompanions, who told me that they were bound for the public-house;whereupon I informed Jasper how I had seen in the stable the horse whichwe had admired at the fair. 'I shouldn't wonder if you buy that horseafter all, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro. With a smile at the absurdityof such a supposition, I left him and his companion, and betook myself tothe dingle. In the evening I received a visit from Mr. Petulengro, whoforthwith commenced talking about the horse, which he had again seen, thelandlord having shown it to him on learning that he was a friend of mine.He told me that the horse pleased him more than ever, he having examinedhis points with more accuracy than he had an opportunity of doing on thefirst occasion, concluding by pressing me to buy him. I begged him todesist from such foolish importunity, assuring him that I had never somuch money in all my life as would enable me to purchase the horse.Whilst this discourse was going on, Mr. Petulengro and myself werestanding together in the midst of the dingle. Suddenly he began to moveround me in a very singular manner, making strange motions with hishands, and frightful contortions with his features, till I becamealarmed, and asked him whether he had not lost his senses? Whereupon,ceasing his movements and contortions, he assured me that he had not, buthad merely been seized with a slight dizziness, and then once morereturned to the subject of the horse. Feeling myself very angry, I toldhim that if he continued persecuting me in this manner, I should beobliged to quarrel with him; adding, that I believed his only motive forasking me to buy the animal was to insult my poverty. 'Pretty poverty,'said he, 'with fifty pounds in your pocket; however, I have heard say,that it is always the custom of your rich people to talk of theirpoverty, more especially when they wish to avoid laying out money.'Surprised at his saying that I had fifty pounds in my pocket, I asked himwhat he meant; whereupon he told me that he was very sure that I hadfifty pounds in my pocket, offering to lay me five shillings to thateffect. 'Done,' said I; 'I have scarcely more than the fifth part ofwhat you say.' 'I know better, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro; 'and ifyou only pull out what you have in the pocket of your slop, I am sure youwill have lost your wager.' Putting my hand into the pocket, I feltsomething which I had never felt there before, and pulling it out,perceived that it was a clumsy leathern purse, which I found, on opening,contained four ten-pound notes, and several pieces of gold. 'Didn't Itell you so, brother?' said Mr. Petulengro. 'Now, in the first place,please to pay me the five shillings you have lost.' 'This is only afoolish piece of pleasantry,' said I; 'you put it into my pocket whilstyou were moving about me, making faces like a distracted person. Here,take your purse back.' 'I?' said Mr. Petulengro, 'not I, indeed! don'tthink I am such a fool. I have won my wager, so pay me the fiveshillings, brother.' 'Do drop this folly,' said I, 'and take yourpurse;' and I flung it on the ground. 'Brother,' said Mr. Petulengro,'you were talking of quarrelling with me just now. I tell you now onething, which is, that if you do not take back the purse, I will quarrelwith you; and it shall be for good and all. I'll drop your acquaintance,no longer call you my pal, and not even say sarshan {119} to you when Imeet you by the roadside. Hir mi diblis {120} I never will.' I saw byJasper's look and tone that he was in earnest, and, as I had really aregard for the strange being, I scarcely knew what to do. 'Now, bepersuaded, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro, taking up the purse, andhanding it to me; 'be persuaded; put the purse into your pocket, and buythe horse.' 'Well,' said I, 'if I did so, would you acknowledge thehorse to be yours, and receive the money again as soon as I should beable to repay you?'

  'I would, brother, I would,' said he; 'return me the money as soon as youplease, provided you buy the horse.' 'What motive have you for wishingme to buy that horse?' said I. 'He's to be sold for fifty pounds,' saidJasper, 'and is worth four times that sum; though, like many a splendidbargain, he is now going a begging; buy him, and I'm confident that, in alittle time, a grand gentleman of your appearance may have anything heasks for him, and found a fortune by his means. Moreover, brother, Iwant to dispose of this fifty pounds in a safe manner. If you don't takeit, I shall fool it away in no time, perhaps at card-playing, for you sawhow I was cheated by those blackguard jockeys the other day--we gyptiansdon't know how to take care of money: our best plan when we have got ahandful of guineas is to make buttons with them; but I have plenty ofgolden buttons, and don't wish to be troubled with more, so you can do meno greater favour than vesting the money in this speculation, by which mymind will be relieved of considerable care and trouble for some time atleast.'

  Perceiving that I still hesitated, he said, 'Perhaps, brother, you thinkthat I did not come honestly by the money: by the honestest manner in theworld, brother, for it is the money I earnt by fighting in the ring: Idid not steal it, brother, nor did I get it by disposing of spavineddonkeys, or glandered ponies--nor is it, brother, the profits of mywife's witchcraft and dukkerin.'

  'But,' said I, 'you had better employ it in your traffic.' 'I haveplenty of money for my traffic, independent of this capital,' said Mr.Petulengro; 'ay, brother, and enough besides to back the husband of mywife's sister, Sylvester, against Slammocks of the Chong gav for twentypounds, which I am thinking of doing.'

  'But,' said I, 'after all, the horse may have found another purchaser bythis time.' 'Not he,' said Mr. Petulengro, 'there is nobody in thisneighbourhood to purchase a horse like that, unless it be yourlordship--so take the money, brother,' and he thrust the purse into myhand. Allowing myself to be persuaded, I kept possession of the purse.'Are you satisfied now?' said I. 'By no means, brother,' said Mr.Petulengro, 'you will please to pay me the five shillings which you lostto me.' 'Why,' said I, 'the fifty pounds which I found in my pocket werenot mine, but put in by yourself.' 'That's nothing to do with thematter, brother,' said Mr. Petulengro; 'I betted you five shillings thatyou had fifty pounds in your pocket, which sum you had: I did not saythat they were your own, but merely that you had fifty pounds; you willtherefore pay me, brother, or I shall not consider you an honourableman.' Not wishing to have any dispute about such a matter, I took fiveshillings out of my under pocket, and gave them to him. Mr. Petulengrotook the money with great glee, observing--'These five shillings I willtake to the public-house forthwith, and spend in drinking with four of mybrethren, and doing so will give me an opportunity of telling thelandlord that I have found a customer for his horse, and that you are theman. It will be as well to secure the horse as soon as possible; forthough the dook tells me that the horse is intended for you, I have nowand then found that the dook is, like myself, somewhat given to lying.'

  He then departed, and I remained alone in the dingle. I thought at firstthat I had committed a great piece of folly in consenting to purchasethis horse; I might find no desirable purchaser for him until the moneyin my possession should be totally exhausted, and then I might becompelled to sell him for half the price I had given for him, or be evenglad to find a person who would receive him at a gift; I should thenremain sans horse, and indebted to Mr. Petulengro. Nevertheless, it waspossible that I might sell the horse very advantageously, and by sodoing, obtain a fund sufficient to enable me to execute some grandenterprise or other. My present way of life afforded no prospect ofsupport, whereas the purchase of the horse did afford a possibility ofbettering my condition, so, after all, had I not done right in consentingto purchase the horse? the purchase was to be made with another person'sproperty it is true, and I did not exactly like the idea of speculatingwith another person's property, but Mr. Petulengro had thrust his moneyupon me, and if I lost his money, he could have no one but himself toblame; so I persuaded myself that I had upon the whole done right, andhaving come to that persuasion I soon began to enjoy the idea of findingmyself on horseback again, and figured to myself all kinds of strangeadventures which I should meet with on the roads before the horse and Ishould part company.