Vancouver Nights

by Blythe Stone

I got out of Olivia's lap and stood beside the chair.

  “Leave us if you must,” I sighed.

  “You're both killing me right now,” Olivia spoke gravely. “He’s really just here for a day.”

  “We’ll see,” Nat said.

  Olivia stood- hunched her shoulders- and walked away, back to the house.

  “Guess I pissed her off,” Nat said.

  “Guess so, but what were you trying to do?”

  “I dunno,” Nat sighed guiltily. “I just don't like it.”

  “What don't you like?” I asked.

  I stepped closer and tried to figure her out.

  “Any of it,” Nat laughed. “Him here. Her stress. Not knowing what she's really feeling."

  “She feels guilty for just leaving him but she just told me that she's thinking of stepping back from the company. She wants to stay here,” I said.

  I took Nat's hand and kissed her cheek.

  “It's scary not to know but I think she's going to pick us,” I assured her.

  “We don't live here Avery,” Nat reminded, a little uneasy. “Our life isn't this simple. Not like she thinks it is right now.”

  Nat hugged herself a little, she was obviously thinking too hard about it.

  “I'm sorry,” she said. “I'm just feeling a little insecure right now. Again.”

  “Okay, well… You still have me. You know I'm yours forever. Some things aren't going to change,” I ventured.

  How could that compare with her long lost love though? That was unfair but since when is the human ego committed to that particular principal?

  Never.

  “You're not a consolation prize,” she laughed and leaned forward over me, tugging on my shirt. “I'm offended,” she said, defending me.

  I shrugged a shoulder. “I just mean you're not alone,” I said.

  I didn't want her to know that sometimes my mind told me that exact thing. Even though I knew she loved me true.

  “Baby, I know I'm not alone,” she said, worried and adoring me with her eyes.

  I nodded, too caught in the web of deceit to find words. She had to know I didn't doubt her, only my own power to hold someone's affections. That was long ago damaged and only partial repairs had been managed over the years.

  “Come inside and lay with me,” she said. “You're freaking me out.”

  “Okay,” I said.

  I let her lead me upstairs and I waited on the bed while she changed and dried off some. When she came back I looked up to see her considering me.

  “What's up?” I asked.

  “You're exceptionally beautiful when you're sad,” Nat explained.

  “How poetic of me.” I propped my head on my hand and watched her. “I'm trying to be more happy than sad but you know how that goes.”

  She crawled up the bed and kissed me, pushing me back. “Any better now?” She wondered.

  “You're touching me. That's instant relief from any ill that could befall me,” I answered.

  Her kisses were a kind of witchcraft that I would never find replicated outside my experience with her.

  “I'm pretty sure you could cure cancer if I had it,” I told her.

  “I hope you're right,” she said, kissing me deeper and pressing her body up and into mine. Her hands found mine and she held them down. “I need you well,” she whispered sexily.

  “As long as you keep me, I'll be protected,” I said, bucking my hips up into her.

  “Ahh,” she breathed. “And yet you've been pouting all day,” she reminded, and teased. “You could have a fever,” she said, kissing my face obnoxiously to overly-check and see. “A little warm. Mmm. How's the rest of your body?”

  I felt her hands groping down my sides and then back up. She pushed my shirt up and kissed my stomach.

  “I think you'll find that if you check a little lower you might discover a different kind of fever that needs tending to right now,” I smiled.

  “Lemme see,” she flirted, encouraging me. “If there's anything I can do to make sure you're well I'm going to do it. I mean. I have time.”

  “You might have to check with your lips,” I teased. “You know, those are more sensitive to temperature, and if your tongue happens to slip into the mix them I won't complain.”

  “Shhh, lemme see baby,” she cooed. Her hands led my pants down. She tugged them just down to my knees. I felt her open mouth dragging along my inner thigh, tasting my soft skin. Her tongue dragging. “Mmm.”

  I shivered and groaned.

  “What did you find?” I asked.

  “I think this spot needs attention,” she breathed. Then I felt her tongue on my sex, gently licking me. “Mmm,” she hummed, delighting me.

  “Fuck, you're right,” I got out.

  She knew by body so well she could probably do this in her sleep.

  When she got into a rhythm she always knew just how to drive me over the edge. Slow but perfect. No movement an accident. She hummed into me.

  36

  (Olivia)

  The day had grown into a fine night. My fears and anxiety from the weeks away and the growing buffer of time I’d put between Farrow and I was finally dissipating. I think I had to remember that Farrow was actually very sweet. I made fun of him all the time for being too perfect. Of course, he did the same to me. My own annoyance with him about how perfect he was always intrigued him.

  “You look beautiful tonight.”

  “Well thank you, Farrow. You're very handsome all of the time,” I mocked.

  “Mm. No, I mean it,” he said, allowing his gaze to travel down me. We sat across from each other in the restaurant he chose that sat atop a high rise and had a live jazz band playing up until closing. “I've never seen you like this.”

  “Like what,” I wondered, drinking my wine down. He quickly moved to refill it.

  “You're happy,” he said, eyes locking with mine.

  “Uh-" I laughed a little and shook my head. “I dunno, maybe,” I shrugged.

  “You are,” he smirked, sure of it. “I’ve never seen you smile this much. I love it.”

  “Why,” I laughed, confused by him.

  “It suits you. It suits you very well.”

  “You're too formal. I hate it,” I laughed.

  “You love it. Don't lie to me,” he beamed.

  “Okay fine. There's no one like you.”

  “So, come on, tell me.”

  “Tell you what?”

  “You want to tell me something. I can tell. I wouldn’t be here otherwise.”

  “That's honestly scary,” I said.

  “Hide from me all you want. I'll still know you.”

  “Right,” I smiled nervously. “This um. This break or whatever it is. I'm into it. I like it.”

  “I can see that,” he smiled again.

  “I’m thinking about extending it.”

  “Hm…”

  “For a long time.”

  “A long time,” he nodded. “Okay.”

  “Okay?”

  “Mhmm. Why not?”

  “Um,” I laughed awkwardly. “We didn't get where we are by accident.”

  “No we did not,” Farrow laughed and rubbed his smooth chin.

  “But, Olivia,” he shook his head, happily. “What's it all for if we can't both enjoy it?”

  I watched him wondering. Was he really okay with it? He seemed okay with it.

  “We’re at a really good place right now Olivia.”

  “I-I know,” I said, still worried somehow.

  “You can hire whoever you want,” he reminded. “Or we can sell high. Wash our hands of it. Be forever rich.”

  “Yeah but. I- I'm not ready yet. I-I can't go back. It's too soon.”

  “Then I will hire someone,” Farrow decided.

  “Farrow. Wait.”

  “You want time,” he said. “You did a lot. And you want time. Correct?”

  “Yes,” I said, worried about doing this. It was so official.

  “You're s
till in charge. Alright? I wouldn't have it any other way. It's still your company.”

  “Our company,” I corrected.

  “We both know you do a lot more than I do Olivia.”

  “Farrow…”

  “What. Are we not telling each other the truth now?”

  “I thought we always told each other the truth.”

  “Um no,” Farrow said. “We both hide big things until we can't do that anymore. Like when I hid that I was in love with you. And you hid that you couldn't love me that way. Remember?”

  “Don't ask me that,” I said, annoyed by him. Of course he had to take it there.

  “We can do this Olivia. Hell, we can even do one better and just sell.”

  “Farrow.”

  “I want to do what you want to do. At this point, that is all I want with our company. And I know that’s shallow and ill-advised on my part and, perhaps, naive and idiotic but I like you and I trust you and the best thing I ever did was hitch my wagon to yours. I owe you my life.”

  “Oh-okay, that’s so crazy, and you have to know that makes me want to kiss you,” I laughed, annoyed by him.

  “And you have to know I’d like that very much.”

  “I do know,” I laughed.

  He reached across the table and grabbed my hand in both of his.

  “It's time,” he said. “We've done a great thing together. We made our baby.”

  “Ew,” I laughed, overcome with sudden emotions about things.

  “Since you’re not ready to let go just yet, I'm going to hire someone for you. Maybe five people,” he chuckled. “And I'm going to miss you every day but then remind myself that wherever you are you are very very happy and spending some of the money you worked very hard to make. Laughing with people you care about and love. And I'm going to take pleasure in knowing that. Okay?”

  “Okay,” I nodded. My hand was squeezing his back reflexively. When I noticed I let up. It was weird.

  “And I am going to hope that I don't let you down or fuck anything up.”

  “You never swear,” I laughed emotionally.

  He started to laugh too. In less than a few minutes, he had put me at ease and the deal had been struck.

  We drank wine, talked about other things. When we got back at night, Nat and Avery were tucked away in their bedroom, I sat up with Farrow and we talked about his wife.

  “So you’re gonna have kids?”

  “Looks that way,” Farrow said. “Wynn went to a specialist and we started trying this week.”

  “Does it feel different?”

  “A lot different, yeah,” he confessed. He brought weed and we were smoking some on the roof in the hot-tub. We didn't do it often, just every once in a while. When we were first starting out we experimented with certain substances to see what they would do to use creatively. Everything did a little of something else. Mostly we just found we were more honest with each other when we smoked.

  In a lot of ways it was a subtle tradition, this smoke time.

  “How is she?”

  “Restless,” he said, shaking his head and staring up at the stars.

  I took the joint from his hand and smoked a little. It felt nice to just hangout again, not have it be about work. I actually couldn’t remember the last time we did this. It was probably Paris.

  “She just gets in these moods where nothing is enough and she can’t calm down.”

  “Sounds stressful,” I said.

  “When I kiss her, it helps,” he smiled.

  A long pause ensued. I smoked again and handed the joint back.

  “Will you tell me what's happening,” he asked.

  “Do you really want to know,” I wondered.

  “Of course I do,” he said, tugging me over to sit closer to him. “Come on,” he asked. He had me close now and our thighs were touching.

  “Well you know how I feel about Natalie.”

  “I do,” he answered quietly.

  “I realized I was still in love,” I said. “That I’d been hanging on for years in hopes that I’d just get over it. Like magic.”

  “Hmm,” Farrow smiled. He hugged his arm around my shoulders. “But you’re happy,” he reminded.

  “The love hasn't died,” I said, staring at him. “It's only multiplied. For both of us.”

  “And the new girl,” he asked.

  “She’s very lovely as well,” I smirked.

  “Oh god,” he laughed, beginning to cough since he started to choke on the smoke.

  I laughed and let him have his space back.

  “That’s,” he laughed and coughed again. “That's a very desirable situation,” he commented. “And not at all what I would've guessed you were doing out here. I thought for sure you got rolled up in some real-estate thing. A house you had to have.”

  “So, I still surprise you?” I asked.

  “Every day,” he swallowed and stared.

  “I do miss you,” I said.

  “Yeah but you've got your hands full,” he teased.

  “Don't be an ass,” I splashed him.

  “No,” he laughed, tugging on me to hug me again. “It's perfect,” he said. “You starved yourself. It makes sense.”

  A lot of people wouldn't be so open-minded about the situation I'd put us all in. I was lucky for Farrow.

  We stayed a little longer but then I excused myself and went downstairs to shower alone.

  He’d leave tomorrow morning and I’d no longer feel the stress of keeping my secrets or avoiding my work.

  Farrow had freed me.

  As the water flowed over me I felt hands turn my body and lips find mine. I knew the hands, and the taste. It was Natalie, she’d been waiting to find me again.

  She led me back against the wall and pressed her body to mine. Then the kissing became its own all-encompassing thing. Like the ocean or maybe space. I was in it and I belonged where I was.

  “Talk to me,” Nat asked, kissing my skin and touching me everywhere. “What’s happening with you?”

  “I'm yours,” I reminded. “He’ll go tomorrow.”

  “And you,” she asked, pushing me in such a way that I could barely contain my yearning for her.

  “I'll stay,” I whispered.

  “How long,” she panted, needing me. I felt small when she did this but I also felt cared for and needed and so so right in a world that often made little sense to me.

  “As long as you want me,” I gasped.

  She lifted me up with her hands at the backs of my thighs. My own back dragged up the cool tile of the wall. My sex wanted her. And it reminded me of Avery.

  Her strong thigh held me up even more than her hands.

  “Fuck,” I gasped as the pleasure ran through me.

  Tomorrow I'd be calm and patient. I’d take Farrow out for breakfast and make delightful small-talk. I'd even leave him a list of important things he should know or do. But I'd be thinking of this, even then. I'd be thinking of being back here and being touched by her. Of her knowing that I wasn't going to hurt her again that I didn’t want to, not now and not ever.

  My mind would fill with all the memories of the past two weeks. Avery and I both writing. The long hours we spent slowly kissing each other and listening to our bodies try to breathe.

  “I love you,” Nat whispered, so tender and shaky.

  “I love you too,” I said, kissing her again, showing her. “I'm not leaving you,” I reminded again.

  We collapsed into touching then, doing and feeling helped a lot more than trying to convey a verbal message that might not be trusted or believed. With all I'd done before I deserved to be mistrusted. For now, I'd love her and allow her to touch me and just hope that we could be okay.

  37

  (Avery)

  I went back into the writing room. That was what I called it now. It was filled with words and thoughts, the tangible bits of which could be caught on printer paper that accumulated in stacks on every surface.

  It was my way of working
and I knew it probably drove Olivia crazy but my haphazardness helped that creative drive inside of me. Sometimes she would pick up a few pages and read. They were peppered with the usual erotic love scenes and romance but there was a folder where I put the most precious of the papers. It was a book, one unlike anything else I’d ever written.