Not Even For a Duke

by A. S. Fenichel

  “She is very beautiful.” Aurora couldn’t imagine why she was poking a sleeping bear, but she couldn’t seem to help herself.

  Turning, the intensity of his gaze made Aurora take a step back. He nodded. “She is lovely. Just because I am not interested does not mean I am blind.”

  “Were you not lovers?” Everything inside her clenched at the idea of Garrett and Helen wrapped in each other’s arms. She tried to push the vision away, but it wouldn’t leave her.

  “No.” He stepped closer.

  “Really?” Aurora bit her lip. Two healthy adults living abroad with nothing to keep them apart seemed the perfect scenario for a tryst. “I assumed with all your traveling you flitted from one bed to the next and that is why you didn’t come home.”

  An instant later, he stood inches from her and ran his knuckles down her jaw. “Rora, is it possible you do not know why I left England and didn’t return for so many years?”

  Heart lodged in her throat, Aurora swallowed several times so she could speak. Had he always been so tall and broad? Had intensity always shone so brightly in his eyes? “Rhys said you wanted to see the world. I once asked your father and he said, you had to sow your wild oats. I hadn’t any notion at the time of what that meant, but I assumed it was to do with women you would make conquests of.”

  “Rora.” His whisper drilled down to the pit of her soul.

  “Garrett, have I said something wrong?” Part of her urged to run away and not pursue whatever was happening in the garden. Another part wanted her friend to know that nothing he could say would change their friendship.

  He stepped back and dropped his hand. His expression was sad, far away for a long moment before he grinned. “Not at all. I did my fair share of oat sowing while on the continent. It was a great deal amusing though left one rather unfulfilled. However, Helen is a lady and never offered herself in such a way. Since I had no intention of marrying her, I would not insult her by attempting to seduce her. She is good company and we share a mutual friendship that has been fulfilling. I would never do anything to harm that relationship.”

  “Why shouldn’t you have wished to marry a beautiful and brilliant woman?” Aurora couldn’t imagine a man better suited to a woman of great mind and beauty. Some men might not like to have a wife with a fine mind, but Garrett loved a good debate regardless of the sex of his companion and opponent.

  “I am not in love with Helen, though I like her very much.” His smile was part amusement and part wicked. “I am happy to hear that you missed me enough to make inquiries as to why I had gone away.”

  A small cloud passed over the moon and the garden dimmed before brightening again. Garrett offered his arm. “Do you think it would be too scandalous if we walked in the garden for a while longer?”

  Slipping her arm through his, she laughed. “I can’t imagine anyone caring that a widow and an old family friend walked in a garden on a fine night.”

  He leaned in. “With the house empty of anyone to keep things proper? All our friends have gone home, Rora. Do you not think someone might consider me a suitor?”

  What an odd thing to say. “I don’t think anyone on West Lane gives a fig about what I do, and no one would believe you would court me.”

  An oak tree blocked the light of the moon. Garrett stopped and turned so they were too close. “Why wouldn’t they believe it?”

  It was too intimate. He was too close and not at all behaving like himself. She hadn’t noticed him drinking overmuch, but the hair on the back of her neck stood up as if he were a threat. Dropping his arm, she stepped back. “Anyone who knows me would be aware that I shall not court anyone. I’m not in the market for a husband, nor shall I ever be.”

  The muscle on the side of Garrett’s jaw ticked. “What did Radcliff do to make you so determined to never court again?”

  Panic rushed blood to her head. Another few steps backward put a distance between them. “I don’t know what you mean. Radcliff is long dead.”

  He looked as if he might leap to close the space, but he held his ground. “I think there is more to it than that. I wonder why you would keep secrets from me, Rora. I’m your friend. I would never harm you or speak about you out of turn. Might not telling me relieve some of your burden?”

  “I have no need of such relief from you, Garrett. I’m fine. I don’t know what it is you want to know, but I think it is time you went home.” Her heart thrummed so loudly that she didn’t know if she could bear the sound much longer. It was like a cacophony in her head. The notion of Garrett ever knowing what her marriage had been like, made her stomach turn. He would never look upon her the same way should he know the truth. To have him look at her with pity, would be unbearable.

  Sorrow burned in his eyes. “I see my time away has put more than distance between us. I shall endeavor to earn back our friendship. Good night, Rora.”

  Before she could tell him how wrong he was, he was gone. She wanted to scream that she was fine. Radcliff had not ruined her, but she knew it was a lie. In three years of marriage to Bertram Sherbourn, the Earl of Radcliff, she had endured abuse that made her damaged beyond repair. A tear rolled down her cheek and then another.

  Running for the house, Aurora bounded up the steps to her room and bolted the door. Her private cry couldn’t last. Soon Gillian, her maid would come to help her undress. It was actually surprising to find the room empty so long after the guests had left.

  Did her maid think she would have an affair with Garrett and that was why she was not already waiting to help her lady to bed? The thought sobered her.

  Wiping her face, she sat on the edge of her bed and drew several long breaths. She went to the basin of water and washed her face before pulling the cord to call for Gillian.

  Chapter 4

  Entering the Breckenridge townhouse with more trepidation than was normal, Garrett chided himself. He was a duke in his own right now and had no reason to feel awkward. It had been more than two weeks since the dinner party and walk in the garden, yet he could think of little else besides the way Aurora had laughed off any possible notion of him being a suitor.

  He’d been more disappointed than he could remember in recent history, perhaps ever. It was well she’d asked him to leave before he’d said anything he might regret. Aurora was a puzzle, to be sure. Despite what she had said, she was one of his oldest friends, and regardless of his feeling beyond friendship, he would never abandon her. With a sigh, he entered the ballroom.

  Large chandeliers were fully lighted, there crystals casting a glow to every corner of the large, elegant room. Frescoes spanned the ornate arched ceilings and the light and shadow played upon the scenes of angels, cherubs, and the lower humans who frolicked in fields.

  A rather sour note from the orchestra made Garrett cringe. Surely Nick and Faith could do better than these musicians. He imagined Mercy was grinding her teeth at the sound.

  It was the first ball thrown by the new Duchess of Breckenridge and it seemed all of good society had come to see how she would fare. Garrett couldn’t care less beyond that he liked Faith and hoped she wouldn’t let the wagging tongues of bored society ladies and gentlemen ruin her pleasure. For his part, he’d only come to see and speak to Aurora.

  After their last talk, he’d been haunted with how to make her see how perfect they could be with each other. Maybe that was too much too soon. He would settle for knowing she didn’t detest him.

  “You look like a man on a mission, Corwin.” Rhys slapped him on the back. “It still feels odd to call you Corwin.”

  It sounded far stranger. “Then call me Garrett as you always have, Rhys. This is such a crush no one will hear you. Besides we’ve been friends long enough to survive the scandal of someone overhearing. We need only bow a greeting, and everyone will be satisfied.”

  They both bowed and then chuckled at the ridiculous need for formality even between childhood friends when in public.

  “I’ve learned from my disruptive and beautiful wif
e that caring what the ton thinks is a waste of time. Give them a moment and they will be on to the next scandal.” Warmth shone in his blue eyes when he spoke of Poppy.

  Being jealous of his friend’s situation was becoming a bad habit. “She is a wise woman.”

  Rhys laughed. “Lord! Don’t let her hear you say such a thing. I’ll never hear the end of it.”

  “What won’t you hear the end of?” Poppy arrived with Mercy and each carried a small crystal goblet of some kind of punch.

  Without regard for his own warning, Rhys indulged her. “His Grace thinks you wise, my love.”

  Beaming, Poppy blushed. “Zeus’s beard! He is a very brilliant man, and I for one shall not argue the point.”

  Mercy sipped her punch. “You would not, I dare say.”

  Poppy laughed. “You are my friend and your sarcasm is unkind.”

  “I shall remember that the next time you employ the same, which shall likely be in the next ten minutes.” Mercy cocked her head and grinned.

  Laughing harder, Poppy nodded. “Probably so.”

  “Have any of you seen our hosts?” Garrett thought he should make a formal salutation and since he’d arrived late, Nick and Faith had no longer been in the foyer receiving guests.

  “They are dancing.” Mercy raised one strawberry blond brow. “Together. It will be the talk of London tomorrow.”

  “Shall we always be plagued with what the ton think of us?” Poppy heaved a great breath.

  “I’m afraid so, my love.” Rhys took her punch and put it on the mantel then clasped her hand and gently pulled her onto the dance floor where they joined a rousing waltz.

  Garrett watched with another pang of jealousy. “Lady Castlewick, since I don’t see your husband, would you care to dance with me. I am a poor substitute, but it would be my honor.”

  A wide grin made Mercy from a pretty woman into a beauty. She discarded her punch to sit beside Poppy’s. “He has gone off to talk to someone about some piece of land he’s intent on regaining for the Castlewick title. I would very much like to dance, as I have several questions I’ve been wanting to ask you, Your Grace.”

  They joined the dancers and Mercy danced lithely and with grace.

  Garrett wished only that the musicians were better. “You must be horrified by the pitiful orchestra.”

  She turned her green eyes toward the corner where the music drifted from then returned her attention to him. “They are pitiful, but most of the listeners will not notice. I had no idea you were musically inclined, Your Grace. Do you play?”

  Shrugging, his neck heated. “Compared to you, I do not play. However, I can manage the pianoforte and a bit of violin when forced. I do have a great love of music and certainly can decipher good from bad. Perhaps that’s why I never endeavored to practice as I should. I was bad and couldn’t bear the sound of my own performance.

  “I’m certain you play very well.” Mercy’s eyes wandered before she returned her attention to him. “Are you planning to court Aurora?”

  The blunt question took him by surprise, and he had to swallowed twice before he could find his voice. “Why on earth would you ask such a thing?”

  She shrugged. “You seemed well suited. You like each other very much. I suspect there may be more than that. You are a duke and also kind as far as I can tell. You have decided to remain in England these last several months.”

  With no apparent conclusion forthcoming, Garrett inferred he must add all of those speculations up for himself. “I have had no indication from the lady to lead me to believe she has any interest in being courted.”

  As if what he said made no difference, Mercy went on. “Did you know my husband attempted to court Aurora? That’s how he and I were thrown together so frequently. It is why we fell in love and married. Had Aurora been the least bit interested in Wesley, I would have stepped back, or never stepped forward...” She looked confused for a moment. “I don’t suppose I ever did step forward. I had to be pushed and dragged a bit. You see, we Wallflowers have seen a darker side of marriage and we are very cautious.”

  “What does that mean?” The hair on the back of Garrett’s neck prickled with dread.

  A myriad of emotions flitted through Mercy’s eyes. He didn’t know her well enough to be sure, but he thought anxiety and worry were among them. She allowed those emotions to move through her then gave him a sad smile. “I’m not at liberty to tell that story, Your Grace.”

  “I see.” Frustration warred with his need to be a gentleman. “Then perhaps you might at least call me Garrett and dispense with the formalities.”

  Her smile returned. “And you will call me Mercy. What a relief. All that Your Gracing would soon become tiring. I never expected to be more than Miss Heath, so you can imagine my discomfort with my current title.”

  “I thought all women wanted to marry men with titles.” Didn’t they?

  “Not all women are created equal, Garrett. Some women just want to play music to their heart’s content while other women want to be scholars. There are even those of us who want to be loved unconditionally and tenderly even if she may not know it herself.” The music ended and Mercy gave him a sly smile before making a pretty curtsy and walking into the thick crowd.

  The moment Aurora entered the room, Garrett knew it. His entire body came alive with hope and his heart pounded out an army march. She scanned the room as if she had little care who she found. Never had he met anyone who hid their emotions as well as Aurora. Yet when her gaze found his, something lit those cool blue eyes. It might not have been joy, but it certainly wasn’t indifference.

  He gave her a slight bow, and she returned a hint of a smile.

  She didn’t hate him. After weeks of worry, his tension eased.

  She left the room and turned down the hall.

  Hastily, Garrett wound his way through the crowd. When he reached the ballroom exit, he nearly collided with Mr. Arafa. “I beg your pardon, sir.”

  With a slow and formal bow, Mr. Arafa said, “My fault entirely, Your Grace.”

  Aurora was nowhere in sight. Disappointment shot through Garrett’s heart, but that was no excuse for nearly toppling a very good man. “No. I was in a hurry and didn’t watch where I was walking. You are kind to take the blame, but it is not necessary. How have you been these last weeks, Mr. Arafa?

  “I am well. My business will take me out of London for several months. I was pleased to gain the invitation to attend tonight as I won’t see these fine friends for some time.” Mr. Arafa frowned as if he questioned the wisdom of leaving for his business.

  “We shall all be here when you return, friend. What troubles you?”

  A forced smile didn’t reach Geb’s eyes. “I worry that I shall miss being accepted as I have been by these Wallflowers of West Lane and the men they have married. It’s silly really. After all, I lived years in England with only one good friend in Nicholas. It seems I have become spoiled by friendship and dare I say, family.”

  Garrett would never doubt the kindness of Aurora and her friends. “I think the ladies would be delighted to hear that you think of them so fondly. I am sure they regard you the same way. Furthermore, I am confident they will miss you as much as you miss them, but if your journey is necessary and cannot be delayed, then write to us here in London and we shall keep you up to date on how we all get on.”

  Wide-eyed, Geb stepped back enough to look at Garrett fully. “That is most kind of you, Your Grace. Do you think the others would mind a letter or two from me as well?”

  “I think they would be very put out if they didn’t hear from you.”

  He offered Garrett his hand, which was accepted immediately. “You have given me much comfort, Your Grace. Thank you.”

  “Nonsense. I have only told you where you stand. It’s more than I know myself to be honest. You would do me a great favor if you would call me Garrett and not by some title I’m hardly worthy of.” A twinge tugged at Garrett’s heart as he remembered how perfectly the Duk
e of Corwin fit his father and how lacking he was in most of the qualities needed for the roll.

  Geb lowered his voice and leaned in. “Garrett, you will fill the shoes of your father in due time. A good man always feels he is lacking. It gives him something to strive for.”

  Not knowing what to say to such a compliment, Garrett nodded and looked back at the ballroom as another round of dancing began.

  A wide smile lit Geb’s face. “I think I will see if Lady Marsden will honor me with a dance.”

  “A fine idea.” Garrett wished he’d been quicker and seen where Aurora ran off to.

  Geb whispered. “I think you might check the door at the end of the hall to the right. What you are looking for may be in there.” With a wink, Geb rushed into the crush of people in search of Poppy.

  A bit stunned by the information and the conspiratorial way it was delivered, Garrett stared down the hall for a long moment. Lit candles led toward the back of the house. It seemed there were stones in his shoes as he forced them one after the other down the hall. The further he moved from the party goers and the music, the more rapid his heart throbbed against his ribs. What an idiot he’d become.

  He stood at the door a moment his hand on the knob and listened. If Aurora was in there and she’d gone to meet a lover, the last thing he wanted was to find her in some romantic state. A flush of anger rose up his neck and cheeks. This would be a hell of a place to have an assignation. She should know better. He pushed the door open.

  The distinctly feminine yet comfortable sitting room was well lit with two large candelabras each holding seven candles and the moon shining in the large French doors. In a ruby gown Aurora stood looking out onto a private terrace and garden beyond. The moonlight caught her golden hair in all its perfect curls and braids.

  Garrett struggled to draw breath even as he thanked God she was alone. “Are you hiding from me or someone else?”