The Elusive Consultant

by Carol Marinelli

  ‘Mum, leave it, please.’

  ‘No, Tessa, I won’t leave it,’ Bronwyn insisted, misinterpreting the blush on her daughter’s face. ‘Why shouldn’t he put in word for you? What’s so good about the London hospitals that they won’t take a good Australian nurse? And if Mac can get your foot in the door, why not seize the day?’

  ‘His name’s Max,’ Tessa said, furiously filling her bowl again from the box of cereal in front of her. ‘And the last thing I need right now is to be grovelling to him for favours.’

  ‘But, Tessa...’ Bronwyn’s voice trailed off as her daughter shot a look across the breakfast table.

  ‘I’m not going anywhere,’ Tessa said sharply. Too sharply, she realised as she watched her mother blink back a few tears—the leaking tear ducts were obviously hereditary. ‘Mum, I’m fine, really I am. I just needed to check out for a couple of days, to be spoiled and mollycoddled, and I’m sorry for all the worry I’ve caused you, but there really isn’t a problem, I’m great now.’

  ‘Honestly?’

  ‘Honestly,’ Tessa lied, making her way around the table and giving her mum a hug. ‘Anyway, why on earth would I want to go to London? You know how much I hate the cold.’

  ‘That’s true,’ Bronwyn sniffed.

  ‘And you’d miss me.’ Tessa managed a grin and a playful nudge. ‘Remember how you embarrassed me at the airport when I went to Queensland for a fortnight.’

  ‘You were much younger then.’

  ‘I was twenty-two.’ Tessa straightened up. ‘You’re stuck with me, Mum, so no more talk about backpacking holidays and big London hospitals.’

  ‘But you’ll be all right?’ Bronwyn still wasn’t quite convinced. She’d seen Tessa down, had heard her break her heart over patients, had nursed her through a couple of broken romances when Tessa had sworn her heart would never mend, but never, not once in twenty-nine years of mothering, had she seen the pain she had witnessed in Tessa when she had arrived utterly bereft at her doorstep two nights ago.

  ‘I’ll be just fine,’ Tessa said assuredly. Picking up her bag, she slung it over her shoulder. ‘I’d best head off home and dig out my uniform, and you’ve got to get ready. Look, stop worrying about me. It’s your thirty-first wedding anniversary today. You should be painting your nails and fretting about what to wear, not getting worked up over your cranky daughter. So, where’s Dad taking you for your anniversary?’

  ‘Just a little seafood restaurant on the bay. We used to go there when we first started dating.’

  ‘It sounds lovely.’

  As her mum dashed off to answer the telephone, Tessa gulped down the last of her chocolate, determined to say goodbye to her mum with the brightest of smiles.

  ‘I really am OK, Mum,’ she said as Bronwyn came back into the kitchen, but seeing her mum’s strained face, the smile faded in an instant. ‘Who was that on the phone?’

  ‘Your father.’ Bronwyn picked up the teatowel and flicked it across a couple of plates, but her shaking shoulders let Tessa know what was coming next. ‘He has to fly off to Sydney tonight, seems they’ve called him for an early breakfast meeting tomorrow.’

  ‘But it’s your wedding anniversary,’ Tessa said. ‘He can’t do this to you today. I’m going to ring him, tell him to cancel—’

  ‘Leave it, Tessa.’ There was a warning note to Bronwyn’s voice that stopped Tessa midway to the telephone. ‘It’s only our thirty-first, it’s not exactly a milestone one, we can go out and celebrate at the weekend.’

  ‘So long as something doesn’t come up,’ Tessa muttered.

  ‘Don’t start, Tessa,’ Bronwyn warned. ‘Your father’s not happy about it, but it’s his work, it’s not as if he has any choice in the matter.’

  ‘Doesn’t he?’

  Tessa’s question hung in the air unanswered as Bronwyn gave a small shrug and turned back to the sink, effectively dismissing her daughter.

  ‘You’d better get moving, Tessa.’ Bronwyn’s voice was unnaturally high as she forced an air of cheerfulness, an act she had perfected well over the years. ‘There’s some sandwiches cut for you in the fridge— best ham, and I managed to get some of that pickle you like.’

  ‘You’ll be all right, Mum?’ Tessa checked gently. ‘I mean, I can ring in sick if you want me to stay.’

  ‘Don’t be daft,’ Bronwyn said.

  ‘The place won’t collapse without me.’

  ‘And neither will I.’ Bronwyn kissed her cheek and even managed a watery smile. ‘Go to work, Tessa, I’d really rather be on my own for now.’

  * * *

  Home was just as she’d left it.

  No banners flying outside, warning of the scarlet woman that resided there, no broken windows or neighbours shaking their fists.

  It was just a kiss, Tessa checked herself, mocking her own imagination.

  He said he loved you. That stalled her in the hallway, but only momentarily.

  He’d no doubt said the same to Emily.

  The answering machine flickering away Tessa had braced herself for but the second she deleted the unheard messages, she regretted it. His voice, his explanation lost for ever, erased.

  If only she could rewind to Monday, freeze-frame the moment that they’d sat on the barstools, still just as friends. If only she could somehow have foreseen what was to come, what would she have done different?

  Had she been flirting at the department store, should she have corrected the sales assistant? Refused to go up to the observation deck? Staring distractedly out of the window, Tessa put a shaking hand to her lips.

  No.

  Because that would take away the one sweet moment in this whole sorry mess.

  Max’s kiss.

  One kiss wasn’t a lot to show for five years of love, but it was almost worth the pain.

  Almost.

  Two more days to get through, two days of smiling and laughing, two more shifts plus his leaving lunch and finally the party.

  In the days leading up to the inquest the days had peeled away, the calendar racing by like a film where they’d happily moved to the next month. Yet now the hands of time seemed to have stopped. Every hour, every moment a feat in itself. Hiding at her mother’s had been necessary and nice, but now it was time to face the music.

  * * *

  ‘Did you enjoy your days off?’ Jane didn’t even bother to look up from the whiteboard as Tessa approached, her greeting so wooden, so uncomfortable that Tessa’s already reddened face deepened its colour.

  ‘Not bad.’

  ‘Max said the court case went all right, you must be so relieved.’ She turned around awkwardly, not looking Tessa in the eye.

  ‘What’s the problem, Jane?’ Whatever was coming, Tessa was ready for it. Sleepless nights had been filled trying to work out how to best deal with the infamous hospital grapevine, and she had decided that any gossip would be nipped in the bud right here and right now.

  ‘I’ve got a wry neck,’ Jane sighed.

  ‘Sorry?’

  ‘I woke up with it. The twins climbed into bed with us and I spent half the night hanging over the side of the bed and now I can’t move.’

  Tessa was so relieved she almost laughed then smothered it with a cough.

  ‘I shouldn’t have come in, or at the very least I should have taken a taxi,’ Jane carried on abstractedly. ‘You should try looking left then right then left again when your neck’s frozen. I just about killed myself getting here.’

  ‘Leave the car here tonight,’ Tessa offered. ‘I’ll see if I can rustle up a cab charge from Heather.’

  ‘Some chance!’ Jane huffed.

  ‘Well, then, I’ll drop you home—you can’t risk having an accident. Are you sure you’re all right to work today, Jane?’ Tessa’s heart sank at the thought of calling for yet another agency nurse. They were short-staffed as it was without calling in someone who didn’t even know the department.

  ‘I’m going to have to be,’ Jane said in a martyred voice. ‘Ella ca
lled in sick so we’re already down on numbers. I’ll just have to battle on as best I can.’

  Battle being the operative word.

  The late shift started off easily enough. All the patients were pretty straightforward, and there was easily enough work to keep Max and Tessa safely at arm’s length, but no sooner had Tessa returned from coffee to send the early shift home that the rumblings started.

  ‘Didn’t you get my messages?’

  Max, who she’d been so skilfully avoiding, caught Tessa unawares as she stripped a trolley in one of the recently vacated cubicles.

  ‘What messages?’

  ‘Oh, come on, Tessa. I must have rung ten times. I’ve been so worried.’

  ‘Worried?’ Her voice was tinged with the incredulous grin he couldn’t see as she busied herself, tucking in a sheet. ‘Worried I might say the wrong thing? Worried I might land you in hot water with Emily?’

  ‘I’ve been worried about you.’ That didn’t even bring a response as Tessa plunged a large plastic pillow into a rather small pillowcase. ‘The last I saw, you were getting into a car with Fred and you haven’t been home for two days.’

  He waited for an answer, a response, in the end reverting to impatiently pulling the pillow from Tessa and hurling it onto the trolley. ‘Will you, please, answer me, Tessa?’

  ‘I wasn’t aware you’d asked a question,’ Tessa answered cheekily. ‘In fact, even if you had, I don’t think it really deserves a reply. Not even my own mother asks for an itinerary of my movements so I hardly think I’m answerable to my boss. I had two days off, in case you hadn’t noticed.’

  ‘I’ve been worried,’ he intoned.

  ‘Why? Did you think Fred had kidnapped me? Whisked me off to have his wicked way? I’m a big girl, Max, some might say too big. I can look after myself, thank you very much.’

  ‘I knew you were upset. We needed to talk.’

  ‘Wrong on both counts.’ Tessa faked a smile. ‘I’m not upset, and we most definitely don’t need to talk.’

  ‘Sorry, guys.’ Jane was too preoccupied with her neck to notice the strained atmosphere. ‘We’re filling up outside and a we’ve just had a storm warning passed through.’

  ‘I’ll be right there.’ Grateful for the excuse Tessa made to go, but Max pulled her back.

  ‘Tessa...’

  ‘If you were that worried about me,’ Tessa said with a calm logic that defied her pounding heart, ‘then you should just have asked Fred.’ Again she made to go, but this time it was Tessa that stopped. Tessa that turned back with a black look on her face. ‘But you couldn’t do that, could you? Couldn’t risk making Fred suspicious. It must have been a rotten couple of days for you, mustn’t it, Max? Wondering what I’d told him, wondering if you were about to be knocked off the pedestal this department’s put you on. Don’t worry, I’m not about to shatter anyone’s illusions. You can go away with them all thinking you’re the nice guy you so perfectly portray. One word of advice, though.’ She shot him a sweet smile that clearly didn’t meet her eyes. ‘You mightn’t be so lucky next time.’

  ‘Next time?’ Max stared at her bemused.

  ‘Oh, there’ll be a next time,’ Tessa said darkly. ‘Not with me, but if you can’t manage to be faithful now, what hope have you got in London? Emily’s not a fool, Max, and she’ll see through you soon enough.’

  The waiting room had filled as quickly as the black clouds in the sky. Stretchers were coming in through Triage, the paramedics drenched as they relayed their findings.

  ‘Darren Canning, forty-two, coming home from work and lost control of the car on the freeway,’ Ryan, Tessa’s favourite paramedic, said in his booming Australian accent. ‘He’s got multiple superficial abrasions and a nasty seat-belt injury. There’s probably a couple of fracture ribs there,’ Ryan added. ‘Some cars slammed into the back of him so there’s a few more heading your way, Tessa.’

  ‘Are any of them seriously injured?’

  Thankfully, Ryan, shook his head. ‘Not at this stage, but we’ll be tied up there a while.’

  ‘Hi, Darren.’ Tessa smiled gently. ‘How are you feeling at the moment?’

  ‘Like a fool.’ Darren mumbled, his shocked face as white as the bandage tightly wrapped around his forehead. ‘I wasn’t even going that fast.’

  ‘It wasn’t your fault, mate,’ Ryan said quickly, and though it seemed like an empty statement for the paramedic to be making it. Tessa knew it must be true. He wouldn’t give that kind of reassurance if it wasn’t genuine. ‘The roads are like glass out there. All this rain after a long dry spell is lethal.’

  ‘Let’s get you onto a trolley, shall we?’ Darren wasn’t exactly dressed for easy access. His suit and tie, combined with his newly fractured ribs, proved a struggle even for Tessa, who had boasted for a giggle at a nurses’ night out that she could undress most men in two minutes flat.

  ‘Need a hand?’ Kim offered.

  ‘Thanks, Kim.’ Tessa smiled at her colleague standing in the cubicle entrance, massaging her back as if she were eight months pregnant instead of twelve weeks. ‘Are you OK?’

  ‘I’m fine,’ Kim said assuredly, but Tessa was convinced she was putting on a brave face. Despite her apparent legendary morning sickness, coupled with a bladder the size of a thimble, Kim had soldiered on without a word of complaint, and now she was standing pinched and pale-looking and obviously in some discomfort.

  ‘If you need a break, I’ll manage on my own,’ Tessa offered, but her kind words only seemed to upset Kim.

  ‘I’m fine, Tessa,’ she snapped uncharacteristically. ‘What do you want me to do?’

  ‘If you could finish getting Darren undressed and run a set of obs, that would be great,’ Tessa replied easily, ignoring Kim’s snappish response, her mind filled with more important matters. ‘I’m just going to make a phone call.’

  As she made her way to the telephone, the fateful night when Matthew had died played over and over in Tessa’s mind. OK, Tessa reasoned, everyone had said she was blameless, even the coroner, and the care Matthew had received had been appropriate for his injuries, no doubt about that. But if Matthews death had taught Tessa anything, it was never to be too proud to ask for help.

  And ask in time.

  Jane, with her wry neck, should be at home with a hot pack, Kim clearly wasn’t a hundred per cent, and though Tessa had a few other nursing staff on duty with her, their experience didn’t add up to much. The foreboding skies and the paramedic’s words needed to be heeded. At any moment the place could ignite, and with the staff Tessa had on she wasn’t quite sure they would handle it. But as Tessa voiced her very real concerns into the telephone, the nursing supervisor begged to differ.

  ‘I know we’re not exceptionally busy,’ Tessa said somewhat exasperatedly, even rolling her eyes and managing a half-smile as Max entered, the drumming of the rain loud against the darkened windows. ‘But the department is filling and I could really use an extra staff member just to clear some patients to the wards and fetch and carry.’ A rather prolonged exchange followed as Tessa was given a guided tour of the department’s failure to meet its budget and the staff-patient ratios deemed appropriate by the nameless faces in Admin. ‘All of which I understand,’ Tessa said as diplomatically as she could, ‘but you know how quickly things change down here.’

  ‘Let me try,’ Max offered, and, as proud she was, Tessa wasn’t going to jeopardise the patients.

  ‘Max Slater here, Sister.’ His voice was affable, but there was no mistaking the authority behind it. ‘Sister Hardy is concerned with the safety levels down here and frankly so am I. We’re in for one helluva evening so two more staff would be much appreciated.’

  ‘Two?’ The splutter down the phone was audible even to Tessa.

  ‘For now,’ Max replied easily ‘If that number goes up, I’ll be sure to let you know.

  ‘They’re on their way.’ He grinned as he hung up the telephone.

  ‘Thanks for that.’

  �
�I had an ulterior motive. Now you’ve no excuse not to take your supper break later.’ He was smiling but the confidence in his voice had gone now that the conversation had moved to a more personal level and Tessa could feel herself start to weaken. Maybe she should hear what Max had to say about the other evening, should at least give him the benefit of the doubt until she heard his explanation.

  This was Max.

  Her friend.

  Five years of friendship had to count for something.

  As if sensing her weakness, God, or the powers that be, threw in a firecracker, nothing too major.

  Yet.

  Just enough to divert her, enough to stop Tessa giving an answer she would surely only live to regret.

  ‘Max.’ Ryan was bearing down on them, his face serious. ‘We’ve got a problem.’

  ‘Why’s it always “we” when there’s a problem?’ Max said, a quick light joke before his face grew serious. ‘What is it’

  ‘Two kids out walking along the cliff at Burney’s point. One of them lost his footing.’

  ‘Go on.’ He prompted.

  ‘Apparently he’s fallen onto a ledge, seemingly unconscious.’ Ryan was talking as he ran back to the ambulance and Max and Tessa followed, Tessa urgently beckoning Jane to join her. ‘The other kids made it back to get help, but the tide’s coming in.’

  Tessa pulled out the emergency cupboard keys from her pocket and unlocked the door by the ambulance bay as she took in the information as Max listened to the unfolding story.

  ‘The chopper can’t go out, the wind is too strong.’

  ‘Who’s with him at the moment?’ Max asked urgently. ‘I can give some instructions over the radio...’

  ‘That’s just it.’ Ryan’s face was lined with concern and the hairs on Tessa’s neck stood up as his grim words reached her ears. ‘No one’s with him. We’re the nearest crew. The rest are stuck with the traffic accident—we’re going out to him now.’