by Kate Swain
“Yeah, slightly,” I told her. “Tanya… could you do something for me?”
“Anything,” she said instantly. Again, her readiness to help touched me.
“Could you maybe bring me a pregnancy test? I’ll feel better if I know for sure.”
“Of course,” Tanya agreed. I gave her Carter’s address. “I’m on my way to the pharmacy now.”
I thanked her repeatedly, then said goodbye and hung up. I shut my eyes, leaning back on the seat. Of all the people I could have told, I was so grateful I had Tanya to help me. She was like a sister.
Twenty-five minutes later, the doorbell rang.
“Amelia! I brought the test,” she said with a smile, handing me a bag with a green logo on it. Inside was the box with the test. “Want me to come with you while you do it?”
“No, thanks.” I smiled at her. I appreciated how reassuring she was being. I felt mixed about the situation. I was half-hopeful and half-terrified.
I went to the bathroom, my heart racing. I had never felt so apprehensive before.
The result was positive.
I stared at it, feeling a strange mix of disbelief, fear, and wonderment. The feeling was like nothing I had ever felt. I didn’t understand it. Nor did I expect it to feel like this.
“I’m carrying his child,” I said aloud to myself, needing to hear it for the words to make any kind of sense.
I knew it was Carter’s—it couldn’t have been anyone else’s.
I went to the kitchen, the test safely bundled away to throw away later. I didn’t want anyone to see it and guess what was going on, especially Carter.
“It’s positive,” I said, as Tanya looked up expectantly.
“Amelia!” She looked up at me. Her eyes were happy, even though the rest of her face was uncertain, as if waiting to see how I felt first. I loved her at that moment.
“It’s positive, and I don’t want to end it,” I said. I hadn’t realized how firmly I had decided already, but in the few minutes between finding the results, and entering here, I’d come to a very definite choice.
“I wouldn’t have said anything either way, but I’m pleased,” Tanya said gently. “If you don’t mind my asking…”
“What?” I asked, feeling the mix of excitement and unreality surge through me.
“It’s Carter’s,” she said. “Yes?”
“Yes,” I agreed, nodding my head. “It’s his child.”
“Are you going…”
“I won’t tell him anything about it,” I said firmly. She looked shocked, and I didn’t blame her. The amount of coldness in my voice surprised me, too. I hadn’t realized how absolutely I wanted to leave him out.
“Are you sure?” Tanya said gently. “I mean… it’s not like he’s an uncaring guy.”
“He doesn’t want to settle down with me,” I said harshly. “He could barely stand having me in his house for this week! I don’t think he wants me to move in.” I laughed. It had hurt me, no matter how hard I’d worked to hide it. He’d been so on edge every time he’s been near me, and he hadn’t so much as looked at me in any way that suggested that he was attracted to me.
Tanya looked skeptical. “I don’t know.”
“I do,” I said. I had told him that I’d move out, and he had been glad. I suspected he was even more relieved than he’d shown. He had clearly been concealing something, and I guessed that he had been itching to whoop and yell. No, he didn’t want me here, and nothing she or anyone else said would convince me of any other possibility. Not after seeing his reaction earlier.
“Okay,” Tanya said. “I understand. It’s got nothing to do with him anyway. Not unless you want it to.”
“Oh, Tanya,” I said, relieved. “I am so glad I have your help.”
“Of course,” Tanya said briskly. “Besides, if I didn’t like being around you and if I wasn’t hoping that you might move back in with me, I wouldn’t be here.”
“Oh, Tanya,” I said again, feeling a deep bond of sisterly love for my friend at that moment.
“You’re my best friend,” she said gently. She looked into my eyes, and I could see she was as touched as I was. I blinked and looked away. She coughed firmly.
“If there’s anything I can do—get a crib, take you to an appointment, anything. You call me.” She gave me a firm stare.
“Thanks, Tanya,” I said again softly. “I appreciate it.”
“I appreciate that you trusted me,” she replied.
I sat there at the kitchen table, waiting for my tea to steam, looking at Tanya, and felt a strange calm flow through me. It was a feeling unlike any that I’d had in my life before. I felt as if I was absolutely certain about what I wanted to do and how I was going to live my life from now on.
I was going to get child support money and move back in over the shop to save on rent. I would contact my mother at some point, but only after the child was born. The child support would help cover the basics, and I would use the money I saved to pay for childcare. I didn’t know how I was going to get around taking maternity leave without Carter knowing, but by the time I had to apply for it, maybe he would not think to ask about the father.
And, I thought, as I sipped my tea, as soon as I felt able, I was going to go to the police and tell them about Luke Lowry, and how he’d been contacting me and threatening me.
I might not have had the courage to file a complaint for myself, but I could do it for my child. I had put up with things for too long, and it was time I took a stand—for both of us. Whatever Carter might think, I didn’t need him to think or do anything. I could do this on my own.
“What do you want to do now?” Tanya asked. Her voice seemed to come from a long distance away.
“I don’t know, really,” I murmured. I was floating in a sense of unreality, a haze that wrapped around me and made me feel strangely peaceful. Now that the initial shock was over, I had made up my mind on what I was going to do. I had a plan.
“I have to go in to work for an hour or two,” Tanya said, making a long face. “I promised the boss I’d catch up on some paperwork.”
“Sorry,” I said, realizing that it was ten o’clock in the morning, and Tanya had been sitting with me for about half an hour.
“Not at all. If you need anything, you let me know. Okay?” Tanya said gently. She reached out and rested her hand on mine. I felt my throat tighten with emotion.
“Thanks, Tanya,” I said softly. “I can’t tell you how much you mean to me.”
“No worries,” she said gently. “If you need me, call. I’m never more than half an hour away. If you want to go to the doctor or anything, you know I’m happy to help you.”
“Thanks,” I whispered.
She stood to leave. I stood too. We hugged.
When I stepped back, my eyes were blurred with tears. I smiled and blinked them away, not wanting her to notice.
“See you soon,” Tanya said, squeezing my hand.
I nodded. “Thank you,” I whispered. “You’re like a sister, really. Thanks.”
She smiled. “I always wanted a sister,” she said. Her mouth twisted up at the corners, and I was amazed to see tears in her eyes. Tanya never got emotional. I had known her since high-school, and I had never seen her choke up. I was moved.
“See you,” I said.
She went out, and I shut the door behind her.
I sat down at the kitchen table and made more tea. I considered what I should do next. I felt calm, and that strange calmness that had descended on me took hold of me, my mind floating in a sleepy state.
“I want this. Really.”
I surprised myself by the depth of my conviction. I hadn’t really given much thought to having children before, but now that I was expecting one, I realized that it meant so much to me. This was my child. Carter’s child. I made a mental checklist of what I had to do this week.
“Well, one thing I have to do,” I told myself firmly, “is to ask Carter for the flat above the shop.”
I wasn’t going to stay here where Carter could guess my condition—not until I was sure whether I wanted him to know or not.
I went to the sink and poured myself some water, then went through to my room to get my clothes together. I still had the keys to the apartment, and I could move back in again this afternoon.
I would wait until Carter came home and tell him then.
I should also go to the doctor to have somebody confirm the test and give me some advice.
Then, I thought as I put my jacket into my suitcase from where it hung in the guest room closet, I would think about going to the police to make a statement.
I had every reason in the world to make sure Luke Lowry was no longer a threat.
23
Carter
I looked up from my desk. It was Monday, and I had barely been sleeping since Amelia moved out. I was confused and worried, and I had no idea what was going on anymore.
Unfortunately, none of that allowed me to neglect the business. I was going through some paperwork and trying to stay awake. I had a full cup of coffee, and the radio was on softly in the background, but it didn’t help to ease my nerves. I stared at a form on my desk, unable to focus enough to fill it out properly.
“Carter?”
“Yes?” Looking through the door, I spotted Adam. He was waiting nervously on the step, one hand clutching something that could have been an envelope. “What is it?”
“Is Amelia here?” he sounded hopeful.
I raised a brow. She wasn’t, which was part of the reason I was worried. She had called in yesterday, asking for a sick day today. In itself, that shouldn’t have been odd—everyone can take a sick day when they’re sick, after all—but she had been secretive and weird since Saturday afternoon. I still felt hurt that she’d moved out. She hadn’t really been clear about why, and I had enough decency to know that I shouldn’t push for answers. It was her life.
“She’s on sick leave.” I raised a brow.
“Oh.” Adam frowned. “Is she okay?” he sounded shocked.
“She’s fine,” I said, feeling somewhat annoyed that he looked so stressed. Why did he think he had anyone’s permission to fuss about her? I realized how possessive I was becoming of Amelia and forced myself to relax somewhat. She wasn’t my property. She was, at this point, only my employee and nothing more. “I’m sure she’ll be back tomorrow.”
“Oh.”
I frowned as Adam turned and walked off again. “What is it?” I shouted after him. “Is there something I can help you with?”
“Nothing, really.” He held up the document in his hand, sealed in a white envelope. “I was just going to ask her if she had a stamp for this. I have to send it to my bank to close my account.”
“I see,” I nodded. “Well, I’m sure there’s a stamp somewhere in the drawers in Amelia’s office. All that kind of stuff is Amelia’s stuff.” I pointed my head at the office where she could usually be found.
“Okay. Thanks,” Adam said. His voice sounded flat and lifeless compared to when he asked for Amelia’s whereabouts, and I felt a bit annoyed with him.
“Carter, you know that’s stupid,” I chided myself. Adam was fond of Amelia like we all were. He had no reason not to be. She was a lovely person and an awesome receptionist. The guys had every reason to worry about her if she was sick.
“I’m also worried,” I reminded myself. “Which is why I’m so grumpy.”
The phone rang, and I jumped. The calls were all routed to my office, now that Amelia was away. I sighed, hoping that I’d be able to take some time repairing bikes today as well, or I might go crazy with sitting still. I answered the phone, wrote down the details for the repair, and went to Amelia’s office to record the appointment in the schedule on her desk. While I was in there, I glanced out of the window.
Her car—the little VW—wasn’t around. It was usually parked in the parking spaces reserved for our employees. She always parked in the one on the end by the wall.
“She’s probably gone out somewhere,” I told myself firmly.
I felt my stomach twist uncomfortably. I tried to recall if I’d seen her car when I came in that morning. I didn’t recall seeing it there. If she was out all morning, that would be odd.
“Carter, stop it.”
I was jumpy because I was worried. And yes, I was hurt that she’d moved out. Maybe I was just being possessive. She had every right to go anywhere she wanted, sick or not. Something didn’t feel right, though.
“It’s my imagination running wild. I just want there to be some reason for why she left.”
I leaned back in my chair with a sigh. I shut my eyes. I should stop panicking, but I had a bad feeling about all of this. Maybe it was because I was feeling left out like there was something she’d hidden from me. Maybe it was because there’d been no news about her stalker in days.
“I don’t like this.”
I tried to focus on my work. I went to the shop. I had a bike to repair and limited time to do it in, which was a challenge I’d usually relish, but today my mind kept wandering. I couldn’t shake this feeling that something was wrong with Amelia.
“Boss?” Matt said as we stopped for lunch. I was dressed in overalls, furiously sanding the paint off a bike, so vigorously that my overalls were covered. “What’s happening?”
“Huh?” I frowned up at him, wondering what he meant. “How do you mean? Something wrong?”
He looked at me strangely. “I mean, you look stressed. Something up?”
I sighed. “Not really,” I said. I stepped back. I had worked on the bike all morning, finishing the bulk of the work in record time. I had been so lost in my own thoughts that I hadn’t noticed the rest of them and what they were up to, which was worrying. The whole shop could have caught on fire, and I wouldn’t have noticed.
“Well, that’s good,” he said gently. “We were worried about you.”
“Thanks,” I said gruffly. I felt embarrassed. I had lost track of work around here. I wondered with a worried shudder who had been answering the phone. I had no idea if it had even rung.
“No worries,” Mark said, coming up behind us. “We’re going to go and grab lunch. Are you joining us?”
“I’ll stay here,” I said, brushing paint-flakes off my trousers. “I should catch up with some office work.”
“Sure,” Mark shrugged. “We’ll just go down to the pizza restaurant. You want anything?”
“The usual. Please,” I said, reaching into my pocket. I pulled out a twenty-dollar bill and handed it to him. “You can use whatever’s left.”
“Okay! Thanks!” Mark beamed, a bit confusedly. It wasn’t usual for me to be that generous, and I felt bad. Not only was I absent-minded about my work, but I’d been barely noticing my brothers. I went off to change out of my overalls and return to my office.
“You need to get yourself sorted out.”
I knew that I wasn’t going to let go of this nagging worry. I needed to do something about it.
Something is worrying her.
From the moment I’d got back on Saturday, I had felt there was something off about her. I thought maybe it was that she was getting sick, but she’d looked fine. The more I thought about it, the more I wondered if she had heard from Luke Lowry again.
“But, then, why would she have moved back here instead of staying with me?”
It didn’t make sense. In desperation, I decided to call Tex. If anything was wrong, he would know.
“Hello?”
“Hi! Carter! What’s up?” Tex’s happy voice raised my spirits just by hearing it. “Something wrong?”
“Kind of,” I hesitated. “Tex… has anybody seen that creep recently? Luke Lowry, I mean.”
“Um…” Tex frowned. “I can call Kyle. He was watching the house yesterday. Won’t take much time to check with him.”
“Thanks,” I breathed. As soon as I’d hung up, I started feeling a bit silly. Why was I acting like this?
Ten minu
tes later, he called back. He sounded worried.
“Carter, he was there.”
“What?” I jumped in my seat. I was suddenly really worried. My heart jumped. “Here? At work?”
“Yeah. He went past the place on Sunday afternoon, around four p.m. Kyle said he saw the car there. It didn’t stay long, just a few minutes, then left.” He sounded worried.
“He might have said something sooner,” I said, feeling like shifting blame, just to dispel the terror inside. “Tex… did he see anything else?”
“No,” Tex confirmed. “That’s all.”
Now I was really worried. I thanked Tex hastily for the information, then put down my phone. I started pacing. What if he had gone past, and she was there? What if he’d tried to attack her? She said she was sick, but maybe it was something else!
“Carter, calm down,” I told myself sternly. Making a fuss wasn’t going to make anything any better.
I texted her. There was no reply, and no sign she was online. I called. No answer.
Where was she? And, more to the point, wherever she was, was she okay?
“Only one thing to do.”
I drew in a breath. My brothers had, along with the motion-sensing lights, installed a small CCTV circuit. If there had been an intruder, or if Amelia had gone out early today and not yet come back, there would be footage. I hated prying, but I had to do something. Taking a breath, I went upstairs. I was going to check.
I logged into the camera. I selected the footage from this morning, just because it would show if Amelia had gone out early this morning and not come back. I watched the recording from today.
At eight o’clock, I saw Amelia coming out of her door. The camera showed the back of her head, the shapes slightly stretched and blurred, as they are on security cameras.
I watched for a while longer. She went down the stairs, carrying her purse. At the point where she reached the end of the stairs, and the range of the camera just started to end, somebody else appeared.
“No!” I shouted. A man launched from the side of the stairs, grabbing Amelia. She screamed, but he covered her mouth. I saw them struggle. Then they both left the view.