Thunder Snow_Prequel to In the Shadow of the Cedar

by Sheila Hollinghead

  Momma rose. “Let’s go. We’ve got work to do.” Momma took Zeke from me. “Get your clothes on. Hurry.”

  Zeke scooted out.

  I rubbed the bridge of my nose. “I’m not going.”

  “What do you mean?” Momma placed her hands on her hips.

  “I’m not working today.” I stood to face her.

  “You will do as I say as long as you live under my roof.”

  “I don’t have to live under your roof.” I went to our tiny room, Momma following.

  Zeke was pulling on overalls. I pulled Poppa’s Bible from beneath my mattress. I hurriedly stuffed a pillowcase with all of our things.

  “Zeke, where’s Poppa’s pipe?” My voice trembled. He pulled the pipe from under his pillow, and I held open the pillowcase for him to put it in.

  Zeke took my hand, and I gave it a reassuring squeeze. Momma watched me.

  “We’re going to Aunt Jenny’s.” My heart pounded in my ears.

  “Sarah Jane, you would leave me with all this work to do? When I’m trying to save our home?”

  I shook my head. “No. You are destroying our home! You’re just trying to save a house and a few acres of land.”

  She clutched my arm. “This is how you repay me? After all I’ve done for you?”

  “After all you’ve done for me?” I laughed.

  “Zeke is not going with you.” She grabbed Zeke by the arm.

  “Zeke?” I looked at Zeke and raised an eyebrow.

  “I want to go with Jay.” He looked at me with anxious eyes.

  She flung him from her. “Go on. But if you go, don’t ever come back. I don’t want to see either of you ever again.”

  Zeke grabbed my hand.

  Gazing down at him, I tried to smile reassuringly. “Do you want to go with me?”

  “Please?” He sucked in his bottom lip.

  Momma followed us into the yard. “I mean it.” She was now yelling. “Don’t ever come back.” Her voice continued to rise. “Do you hear me?” She fell to her knees.

  My heart broke for her, but I steeled myself. I couldn’t, we couldn’t, continue living like we had been.

  I whistled for Chance, and he ran after us, stirring up a cloud of red dust.

  When we were out of sight of the house, I exhaled noisily, not even aware I had been holding my breath. The sun rose as we walked and dispersed some of the early-morning chill.

  “Are we going to Aunt Jenny’s, Jay?” Zeke whispered.

  I looked down at him and nodded. His Aunt Jenny’s at least.

  “What’s wrong with Momma?” He tilted his face to mine, and the early morning sun sparkled in his eyes.

  I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know. But you’re safe with me.”

  I gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

  I hoped I was telling the truth.

  Chapter 32—Knowing

  We walked the rest of the way in silence. When Laurie opened the door to our knock, she gasped and stared at my cheek.

  Momma’s blow to my face must have left a large bruise. I touched my cheek gingerly and winced as Laurie dragged us in, taking the pillowcases and slinging them aside.

  “Momma, Poppa!” she called.

  Aunt Jenny and Uncle Colt rose to meet us.

  “Uncle Colt, Momma needs you.”

  He searched my eyes for a second and left without a word.

  They had been eating breakfast, and Aunt Jenny fixed us plates.

  But I wasn’t hungry. I pushed the food around. Aunt Jenny glanced at my cheek. She cleared her throat and glanced at Zeke but didn’t say anything. I was glad.

  Laurie hugged us tightly before leaving for school. William even gave me a brief hug.

  Neither wanted to go, and Aunt Jenny had to shoo them out.

  I helped Aunt Jenny clean the kitchen. When we finished, Aunt Jenny suggested Zeke take a nap, and he readily complied.

  Although I hoped Uncle Colt would be able to stop Momma, I still expected her to show up any minute, no matter what she had said.

  When we finished the dishes, I paced around restlessly. I wanted to know about the date on the birth certificate but was afraid to ask. Did I really want to know Poppa was not my real father?

  I wrung my hands together. Aunt Jenny got the churn out and began churning.

  She cleared her throat and her eyes softened. “Jay, do you want to talk about it?”

  I sat down and laced my fingers together. Did it matter if Poppa wasn’t blood kin? He was the only father I had ever known. The best father anyone could have, no matter what. He was my Poppa.

  Still, I had to know. I took a deep breath. “I found Momma and Poppa’s wedding certificate. The date on it was 1923.” My words came out in a whoosh. I clamped my lips tightly and watched Aunt Jenny through my lashes.

  Her eyes widened, but she did not speak. Her hand slowly quit churning as she stared into the distance.

  “Aunt Jenny?” I spoke softly.

  She turned her head to me, and her glance caught mine.

  “I promised your father I would never tell you.” Her eyes, so much like Poppa’s, welled with tears.

  The door swung open, and Uncle Colt entered. My heart leaped to my throat. My heartbeat steadied when I saw Momma wasn’t with him.

  Aunt Jenny looked at him. “Well?”

  “I left the preacher and Doctor Burch with her. The doc gave her a shot that calmed her. She’s sleeping now.” Uncle Colt’s face was white and strained.

  Sadness filled me. What had I done to Momma? I wrung my hands, finally clutching them together.

  Uncle Colt looked at me. “Your momma has been needing help for a while. Preacher Patterson thought we needed to get Doctor Burch long ago.” He stopped and glanced at Aunt Jenny.

  She sighed and leaned back in her chair. “We just didn’t know what to do. We’ve been praying so hard.” Tears glistened in her eyes.

  I swallowed down the lump in my throat and nodded. We couldn’t go on like we were.

  Aunt Jenny stood and came to kneel in front of me. She took my hands in hers and studied my eyes before speaking. “Jay, your father married Molly after you were born.”

  Uncle Colt strode to Aunt Jenny and put a hand on her shoulder.

  She tilted her head to look at him. “She found James and Molly’s wedding certificate.”

  “Oh.” Uncle Colt said, softly. He nodded his head.

  I managed a smile, although tears stung my eyes. “It’s okay that Poppa wasn’t my real father.”

  Aunt Jenny placed one hand on my cheek. “Of course he was your father.”

  “Yes.” I nodded my head in agreement. “He treated me the same as Zeke. He loved me even if he adopted me.”

  Aunt Jenny cleared her throat, and her eyes traveled to Uncle Colt.

  He shook his head. “No. You’ve got it wrong. You were not adopted by your father.”

  Aunt Jenny took my hand in hers. “James was married before. Your momma died when you were born.” She gave my hand a gentle squeeze. “Molly adopted you when she married your father.”

  “What?” My head swirled, and I tried to understand Aunt Jenny’s words.

  “James was married to Frances Bryan.” She glanced back at Uncle Colt.

  “Frances Bryan?” I frowned. That was Uncle Colt’s last name.

  “She died when you were born.” Aunt Jenny searched my eyes. Her own brimmed with tears.

  Uncle Colt knelt beside Aunt Jenny, and tears also glistened in his eyes. “Jay, your mother was my sister, Frances. We called her Frankie.” He cleared his throat and looked away.

  “Your sister?” I shook my head, trying to make sense of it all.

  Aunt Jenny smiled at me. “Your poppa and I married a sister and brother. Laurie and William are your double cousins.”

  I looked from Aunt Jenny to Uncle Colt. “Why didn’t Poppa tell me?” I searched Aunt Jenny’s eyes.

  “Molly didn’t want him to.” She leaned back on her heels. “
After you were born, after Frankie died, your poppa left you with us. He went up north to Birmingham. When he came back, he was married to Molly.” She squeezed my hand and smiled. “It’s going to take a while to let it all sink in. But I’m glad you know.”

  Uncle Colt stood and helped Aunt Jenny to her feet. No one spoke.

  Aunt Jenny went back to her churning, and Uncle Colt mumbled and went out. I stared down at my hands in my lap. My mind just wouldn’t function.

  I pushed myself from my chair, my legs feeling strangely weak. “I’m going for a walk.”

  Aunt Jenny nodded, and I went out. My feet led me to Cedar Spring. I sat under the cedar tree, leaned my back against the trunk, closed my eyes, and steadied my breathing gradually.

  Frankie. I said the word out loud, and it sounded strange to my ears. My mother was Uncle Colt’s sister. Laurie and William double cousins.

  Did my mother have other family still living? I had never heard Uncle Colt talk about his family. I would have to ask him. I wiggled into a more comfortable position.

  Momma may not be my mother, but she was Zeke’s momma. And Poppa’s wife. Poppa had loved her.

  My stomach growled, and I stood and stretched. I’d best be getting back and check on Zeke. The sun, high overhead, showed me it was about lunch time.

  A cool breeze blew, and I shivered as I walked back to Aunt Jenny’s. It was October, a little early for such cool weather.

  I shook my head. All that cotton still in the field, and it was already October.

  Cooking smells of turnips and cornbread drifted out to me as I neared Aunt Jenny’s house.

  I went in. Zeke sat at the table, his head nodding.

  “Time to wake up, Zeke,” I said.

  He rubbed his eyes.

  Aunt Jenny smiled. “Jay, will you get the butter out?” She indicated the churn on the table.

  “Yes, ma’am.” My hands shook as I removed the butter from the paddle, placing it in a covered dish.

  I poured the buttermilk into a pitcher, spilling some in the process. I wiped up the mess.

  “Can I have a glass, Aunt Jenny?” Zeke asked.

  “Sure can. Jay, will you pour your brother some buttermilk?”

  I nodded. Aunt Jenny was frying chicken, and my mouth watered.

  “Dinner will be ready in a bit. Colt’s in the barn. Why don’t you go fetch him, Jay?”

  Zeke already had a buttermilk mustache. He swiped at it with his arm and eyed the chicken hungrily.

  “Keep your hands off that chicken,” I warned him and went out smiling.

  My steps slowed as I neared the barn. Uncle Colt stepped out, and I stopped, feeling shy. He was now someone I didn’t know—my mother’s brother.

  I scuffed a toe in the dirt. “Uncle Colt, dinner’s almost ready.”

  “Yep, I can smell the chicken frying. I was heading that way.”

  My eyes sought his, and he stepped closer, pulling his wallet from a back pocket of his overalls. “Before we go in, I want to show you something.” He opened it, pulled out a picture, and handed it to me. “Your mother.”

  I studied the picture. She appeared to be no older than me. Her hair curled around her shoulders, and she had Uncle Colt’s smile. I held out the picture to him.

  He pushed it back to me gently. “You keep it. I have another one.”

  I glanced at him through my lashes. “Thanks.” I slipped the picture in my pocket.

  I placed my hand on Uncle Colt’s arm to stop him before we went through the door. “Should I tell Zeke that Momma’s not my mother?”

  He patted my hand. “If and when he’s ready to hear. It’s not good to keep secrets.”

  I nodded my head in agreement. “Uncle Colt . . .”

  He waited for me to speak.

  “Do you have any other family?”

  I held my breath.

  Chapter 33—The Trip

  He smiled. “You mean, do we have.” He nodded his head. “I have a sister who lives in Plainsville, near Auburn.”

  “Really?” My heart thumped in my chest.

  “They’ve wanted to meet you all these years.”

  “Does that mean I have more cousins?” I watched his face eagerly.

  “My sister and her husband are childless.”

  I was disappointed but at least I had an aunt and uncle. I wanted to question Uncle Colt more, but the smell of fried chicken was too alluring.

  We went in, and I ate until I thought I would pop. After lunch, Zeke trailed out with Uncle Colt while I helped Aunt Jenny with the dishes.

  We worked for a while, Aunt Jenny chatting about the neighbors. I barely heard her. My mind spun with all I had learned that day.

  When Aunt Jenny fell silent, I spoke. “What’s going to happen to Momma?”

  She shook her head and sighed. “Wish I knew.”

  “Wouldn’t it be best if Zeke and I left?” I held my breath, not knowing if I wanted her to say yes or no.

  Her eyes widened. “Left? Where would you go?”

  I rubbed the cloth round and round on the plate until it squeaked. “Uncle Colt said he has a sister living in Plainsville.” I placed the plate on the shelf and turned to face her. “Do you reckon she would let us stay with her?”

  Her eyes searched mine. “Jay, is that something you really want to do?”

  I wrung the cloth in my hands. “I’m afraid Momma will try to take Zeke and me back. It would just be for a little while. Until Momma . . .”

  “Feels better?” She nodded and sighed. She took the rag from me and hung it on a nail. “It just might be best.” She nodded her head. “I’ll talk to Colt.”

  She went out and returned in a few minutes with Zeke. “Colt’s going to the store to call his sister.”

  My hands shook, and I clasped them together.

  “Why don’t you lie down for a while? Zeke can help me gather eggs.”

  I nodded but didn’t speak. I went to Laurie’s room and climbed on her bed.

  The room spun around me, and I closed my eyes. What had I done? When Uncle Colt got back, I would tell him I changed my mind.

  My mother’s family. What were they like? Well, Uncle Colt was nice, wasn’t he?

  I pulled my mother’s picture from my pocket and studied it. She had a kind face. Maybe it would be okay if we went to visit her sister.

  But to leave here? Why had I ever said I wanted to go?

  Slipping the picture into Poppa’s Bible, I closed my eyes tightly and began to pray.

  And then I slept.

  UNCLE COLT WOKE ME and told me to walk with him outside. I followed him out, groggy from my nap.

  “Liza can’t wait for y’all to visit.” He squeezed my shoulder with one broad hand.

  “Liza?”

  “My sister who lives in Plainsville.”

  I nodded and bit my bottom lip.

  “Are you okay?” he asked gently, raising my chin up.

  “Yes, sir. Just tired.” And scared.

  “You’re leaving first thing in the morning, if you’re sure you want to go.” His eyes were full of compassion.

  I had to look away to keep from crying. “I’m sure,” I heard myself saying.

  He nodded his head in satisfaction. “I’ve been praying all day. I’ve got a feeling this is going to be the right thing for you, and for Zeke, too.”

  “Aunt Liza . . .” The name sounded strange to my ears. I tried again. “Aunt Liza doesn’t mind if Zeke visits?”

  “Of course not. She loves young children.” He scratched the stubble on his chin.

  “Are you coming with us?”

  “No, it will take too long by mule and wagon. I can’t be away for that long. Besides, I have to see about Molly. And the farm.” He gave me a quick hug. “I’ve hired someone to take you by car.”

  “Who?”

  “Never you mind.” He grinned at me. “Let’s go tell Zeke.”

  I trailed behind him up the steps.

  Zeke didn’t take it
very well. I held him in my lap, but he scrambled down and ran to Aunt Jenny.

  “I don’t want to go to Plainsville.” His blue eyes rounded.

  Aunt Jenny held him from her at arm’s length. “Zeke, it would be best if you go with Jay.”

  Zeke gazed at her solemnly and shook his head. “Why can’t we stay here?”

  “Your momma is sick,” Aunt Jenny said gently.

  “Sick?” Zeke’s eyes widened even more.

  “Not sick like your poppa.” She smiled at Zeke. “Sometimes people need help . . . because they’re sad. The doctor can help her feel happier.”

  “Momma won’t be sick anymore?” Zeke asked.

  “She might have to go in the hospital, but it would just be for a little while.”

  I nodded my head vigorously. “So, we can come back later, Zeke.” I hoped it was true. I tried to imagine Momma happy and normal but failed.

  “How far away is Plainsville?” Zeke asked.

  “A little over a hundred miles.” Uncle Colt placed a gentle hand on top of Zeke’s head.

  “Hundred?” His brow puckered. “A hundred is a lot. How will we get there?” He crossed his arms. “I’m not riding a car.”

  I smiled at his poked-out lip.

  “It’ll be fun,” Aunt Jenny said. “I’ve got a bag you can borrow to pack your things in. Let’s go find it.” She held out her hand, and he allowed her to lead him from the room.

  Uncle Colt smiled at me. “Zeke doesn’t like cars very much.”

  “Nope. But then, he’s never ridden in one. If we can get him in, I bet he’ll like it.” I rose from the chair and paced around the room.

  I came to a halt by the cold fireplace. Butterflies danced in my stomach. Tomorrow we were going to Plainsville. Even now I could tell Uncle Colt I didn’t want to go.

  But I didn’t.

  Uncle Colt left, and I went to find Aunt Jenny and Zeke.

  THE NEXT MORNING WE told William and Laurie goodbye before they left for school.

  Aunt Jenny thought it best not to mention to them that we were going to Plainsville. She didn’t want word to get back to Momma before she had a chance to talk to her.

  Zeke and I were ready, sitting on the front porch when Mr. Drake’s Phaeton pulled into Aunt Jenny’s yard. My heart sank.