It was my turn to swallow down the lump stuck in my throat. As much as I needed to be careful, something inside me had woken up and going back to the way things used to be, would be impossible.
"I don't want to walk away," I took a deep breath. "But I can't put a label on this yet. It's just-"
The rest of what I had to say disappeared when Logan pressed his lips to mine again. He didn't kiss me slow and deep, it was just a simple kiss but it didn't have any less of an effect on me.
"Shh," he murmured against my lips. "We'll go as slow as you need us to go."
It wasn't enough that he'd already crawled beneath my skin, now he was breaking down my walls brick by brick. The funny thing was that I wasn't all that sad to see them crumble to the ground. I just hoped that this risk I was taking wouldn't come back and bite me in the ass.
Absolutely unforgettable, that's what that kiss was. Even when we went back inside and finished our game and a few sodas - Logan was driving and I didn't want to drink alone—I couldn't stop thinking about it. I also couldn't stop wishing for a repeat performance.
Unfortunately, by the time I was climbing into his truck, Logan hadn't even attempted to touch me, let alone kiss me. I couldn't decide if it was a good thing or not. I understood I was the one who wanted to go slow, I just didn't realize that after one kiss I'd be hooked.
Soft, bluesy music filled the silence in the cab of the truck as we made our way to Chase's house to pick up Flynn. As I watched the darkened landscape roll past the window, it hit me that I didn't want the night to end. And it wasn't about sex.
Sure, I wanted to sleep with Logan but more than anything I wanted to keep feeling the way I felt when I was with him.
Like I mattered.
Like I wasn't damaged.
Turning my gaze to him, I sneaked a peek at the man who had so spectacularly broken down some of my walls. It always amazed me how comfortable he looked in his colorful skin. And tonight was no different. With one arm resting on the door panel, the other loosely gripping the steering wheel and his dark strands spilling over his forehead, he looked as carefree as I longed to feel.
"I can feel those pretty eyes of yours on me, Sugar." He spared me a quick glance before returning his focus to the road. "What's on your mind?"
"You," I answered softly but honestly.
"Mmm, I like that."
A minute later we were pulling into Chase's driveway. I'd barely hopped out of the truck when the warmth of Logan's palm seared into the small of my back, leading me up the cobblestone path.
I felt slightly uncomfortable when his hand never left my back as he brought the other up to ring the doorbell. We weren't even one hundred percent sure what was happening between us and I was afraid if his brother were to see us in such an intimate position, he'd make assumptions. He wouldn't be wrong; I just wasn't ready for the whole world to know.
As fast as I could I took two steps to my right earning me a hard look from my left. Just as Logan's mouth started to move the door in front of us swung open. Greeting us wasn't Chase though, it was Eli.
The discomfort I'd felt moments ago increased tenfold. Whatever smart-ass comment Chase was to make, I could handle. But Eli's distrusting eyes scanning me with nothing but suspicion was a bit too much.
After giving me a thorough once over Eli turned his attention to Logan. "I didn't expect to see you so soon, brother. I thought for sure it'd take a bit longer to…get her out of your system."
"What the-"
Before Logan even had a chance to finish his sentence I stepped between the brothers and bravely glared at Eli. "Where's my son?"
Over my head, the two Jackson men were locked in a testosterone battle, staring daggers at each other. For a moment I thought I was going to have to come up with a way to defuse the situation but then Eli broke eye contact with Logan and addressed me.
"He's watching a movie with Chase and Molly in the TV room."
I gave him a tight nod before pushing past him. As I ventured deeper into the house, I could hear angry whispering behind me. I had no doubt that I was the subject of their heated argument. Trying to shake the guilty feeling that had suddenly overcome me I made my way to the back of the house where I found Flynn, Molly, and Chase fast asleep.
When I bent down to scoop up my boy Molly's dark head caught my eye. I honestly didn't understand how a man with such a beautiful little princess could be so angry all the time. But I guess everyone had their secrets, I just wished that Eli would stop being so damn interested in mine.
By the time I stepped back outside, there was no sign of Sheriff Jackson, just Logan leaning against his truck with his arms folded and his legs spread. The earlier ordeal almost disappeared from my mind when he spotted me and his lips curved into a wide smile.
An excited bark reminded me of Dozer's presence. I didn't even have to wonder how I missed him sitting next to Logan. Whether I wanted to admit it or not, that man always had my full attention whenever he was in the vicinity.
"I'm sorry my brother was an ass," Logan said to me once we were on the road again. "It's not an excuse, but life has dealt him a pretty shitty hand and he likes to think that entitles him to be a jerk."
I started to nod in understanding when Logan took hold of my hand resting on the seat. "And just in case you were wondering, Sugar, this...attraction—or whatever the hell is brewing between us—isn't something that I want to get out of my system."
"Okay," I sounded like an idiot but the sincerity in his voice scared me. For once I allowed myself to think back to those early days with Drew. He'd been charming and convincing but I couldn't remember him ever sounding sincere.
Because I couldn't voice that we were on the same page I squeezed Logan's hand. He seemed to understand the meaning behind it. It might have been dark, but I didn't miss it when his eyes darted to mine or when he graced me with a smile.
We pulled to a stop in my driveway and before I even had a chance to get Flynn from the back seat Logan was already cradling my boy to his chest. The image held my heart in a vice grip and showed no chance of letting up as Logan purposefully strode through my house to place Flynn in his bed.
Not for the first time that night I felt out of my element. What was to happen next? Was I supposed to invite him for coffee or walk him to the door? As I stood in my hallway trying to figure out how to proceed, Logan appeared in front of me looking a lot more troubled than he had a few moments ago. The sadness I'd spotted in his eyes a couple of times before seemed to be back.
"I…uh," his hand came up to rub his neck as he studied the floor. "I'm gonna go. Lock up when I'm gone." Reaching into his pocket he pulled out the keys to the truck and dropped them on the coffee table on his way to my front door.
"Logan?" I took one step toward him but the storm brewing in his eyes had me stopping in my tracks.
"Sweet dreams, Sugar."
And just like that he was gone, leaving me a hell of a lot confused. What on earth could have changed in the little time it took him to tuck Flynn in? Again I was reminded of the fact that everyone carries their own secrets, some are just better at hiding them than others. And Logan, it would seem, was the best.
When I woke up the following morning I was feeling more than a little ticked off. I'd spent most of the night tossing and turning over Logan's abrupt departure. After the intensity of the evening, I wasn't expecting it to end like that.
That was why when I heard a knock at the door I stomped over and pulled it open with a lot more force than necessary without even checking the peephole. On the other side stood an amused looking Lizzy, holding up two coffees.
"So I guess you didn't get laid then?" My very funny friend handed me one of the cups before pushing past me to plonk down on my couch. "So?"
I closed the door and turned to her. Pulling up my shoulders I asked, "So what?"
Like a defiant teenager, Lizzy rolled her eyes at me and sighed heavily. "I rolled out of bed way earlier than normal just to get all the
juicy details of your date with Mr. Mechanic. I even brought you coffee and you just stand there and shrug. No, nope, not fair. Spill!"
I had to laugh at her dramatic little speech. Taking a much-needed sip of my hot caffeinated drink I settled into my seat, Lizzy's expectant eyes never leaving me. "It was good," I told her after a while. "We had beers, played some pool, kissed and then-"
"Wait! What?" Excited, Lizzy scooted to the front of her seat and leaned forward. "You locked lips with Logan?"
Maybe it wasn't in good taste to be sharing this, but the truth was, I needed to tell someone. "I did, and it was…amazing." I was perfectly aware of the little sigh that left my lips but it couldn't be helped.
The anger I'd felt not five minutes ago quickly made way for some major swooning.
What the hell was this man doing to me?
I had no idea how I was going to explain my behavior to Harper, but I knew I had to try. She deserved so much more than the way I'd left the previous night. Definitely not my finest moment, that's for sure.
It was just my luck that after she finally—FINALLY—admitted that there was something simmering between us a small thing like carrying Flynn to bed would trip me up. I knew if I'd stayed, there would've been no way I'd be able to hide the black, aching hole in my chest.
I was uncharacteristically nervous when I pulled open the door to the clinic, the bell above the door even giving me a bit of a start.
Really? Grow a pair, man.
For 9 AM on a Friday morning, the clinic was certainly buzzing. Dogs, cats, birds, and even a turtle all waiting to be checked out. A sense of pride filled me as I moved through the waiting room toward Harper's desk. My brother was still one of the few people who didn't do it for the money but for the love of the animals. He had no problem giving people credit and most times he'd even help them for free.
With her back to me, Harper was bent over a cabinet frantically searching through the files. I tried so damn hard not to be a pervert and stare at her perfect little ass, but I failed miserably. There was just something about the way those jeans hugged her backside.
She must have mistaken my presence behind her for Chase's because she held a file triumphantly in the air before spinning around.
"I found…Oh," I didn't like the way her voice went from enthusiastic to flat the moment she spotted me.
"Sugar," I managed. "We gotta talk."
"We're kind of busy," Harper nodded her head toward the full waiting room. "No time for chit-chat." It was very possible that it was my imagination but my pretty little sugar sounded a bit ticked off.
A good sign.
Relief spread through my body like a wildfire and I couldn't help but grin when I said, "I got time. I'll just wait until you're… not busy." Before she could open her mouth and protest, I parked my ass in one of the empty chairs.
After I fired off a quick text to Brett letting him know that I wouldn't be back at the shop until later, I leaned back and waited.
Two hours later the madness had finally died down. While Chase was tending to the last patient of the morning, Harper emerged from behind her desk and put up the 'closed for lunch' sign. On her way back she indicated for me to follow her.
I kept my distance as we walked down the little hallway that led to the kitchen. Once we entered a little ball of fuzz curled itself around Harper's feet. Upon closer inspection, I saw it was a three-legged kitten that looked like it had seen better days.
Immediately, Harper stooped and gave the feline some love; cooing and scratching its little ears. One thing was for sure, she had a way with broken creatures. Was it perhaps because she understood their pain?
"You're angry," I said after she'd released the kitten and started yanking open cupboards. I was fighting a damn losing battle with my smile as I tried to hide it.
Harper spun around and glared at me through narrow eyes and the only thing I could think of was how badly I wanted to kiss her.
"I am not. Why would you think that?"
"Yes you are," I didn't hide my smile this time as I took a step toward her. As expected, she took one back. But I just kept going until she was backed up against the counter with my arms caging her in.
"Is it because I didn't stay last night?"
I could see her nostrils flare while her throat worked down a swallow. I wasn't sure if it was because of my proximity or because there was truth in what I'd said. Call me greedy, but I was hoping for both.
"It is, isn't it?" I was aware that I was pushing her buttons and my luck at the same time.
"The way you left," she said at last. "It was…confusing."
For a few seconds, I allowed myself to get lost in her eyes and all the hesitancy swimming in their green depths. I leaned in and ran my nose along her cheek, stopping at her ear. "Sugar," I breathed out. "You have no idea how desperately I wanted to stay. Just know that you weren't the one who chased me away, it was my own demons."
And then, because I just couldn't help myself, I pressed my lips to her skin and trailed them to her waiting mouth. I was quickly reminded of how easy it was for me to get lost in all things Harper. As I twirled my tongue around hers, tasting her, savoring her, the whole world fell away.
We were both so utterly sucked into the moment that neither of us heard my brother enter the kitchen. I was alerted to his presence when I felt a tap on my shoulder. But even then, we didn't break apart like two naughty teenagers.
"Uh…" Chase sounded extremely amused, and I just knew what tonight's dinner conversation was going to be about. I couldn't bring myself to care though. "I know you two are wrapped up in your own little bubble but I'm hungry and I definitely did not order a show with my lunch."
For the first time since I'd met Harper, I saw something that resembled embarrassment flash in her eyes when I put a few inches between our mouths. "You're just jealous," I told Chase without breaking eye contact with Harper.
I gave her one more quick kiss and with a promise to call her later, I walked out of the clinic feeling about ten feet tall.
Friday night dinners at my parents' place were always something to look forward to. Daisy Jackson knew how to keep her boys happy by feeding them good food. As I made my way down the long drive that led to the old-school farmhouse I grew up in, I was reminded of how much I missed the ranch.
Orange and pink seeped through the clouds as the sun sat low in the sky. The grass seemed greener and the birds chirpier. That also might've had something to do with Harper. When I reached the house, I noticed that my dad was already enjoying a beer on the porch. I also noticed that my brothers weren't there yet which gave me some time to chat with Pop.
After parking my bike behind my dad's pick-up I made my way to the house. My momma was most definitely going to kill me for not going in to greet her first.
"Hey Pop," I grabbed a beer from the cooler next to dad's chair and sank down opposite him. "How's life?"
My dad leaned closer and tapped his can against mine. "It's good, son." After taking a swig he settled back in his chair and gave me a knowing smile. "Probably not as good as yours."
I should have known! "He told you, didn't he?"
My dad let out a wheezy laugh that ended in a cough. "Chase phoned your momma this afternoon. Told her he caught you sucking that girl's face off." Pop started laughing again and I couldn't help but join in.
"So are you gonna bring her around to meet your momma and I? Or are you planning on hiding her forever?"
"I'll bring her eventually, Pop. Right now we're taking things slow. I don't want to overwhelm her and scare her away, ya know?"
The truth was I couldn't wait to introduce Harper to my parents. I just knew that they would be as crazy about her and Flynn as I was. A cloud of dust signaled one of my brothers' arrival and I chose that time to duck inside the house and greet my momma.
It was no surprise that I found her in the kitchen furiously stirring some delicious concoction.
"Logan, my boy," she cooed when she spott
ed me. Promptly dropping her spoon and spreading her arms wide. I wasted no time; momma's hugs were the best even if I had to bend down to get them.
"You have news?" Expectation burned in her eyes.
Cupping my mom's elderly face in my palms, I dropped a kiss on her forehead. "Not just yet, Momma. But soon."
My mom reached up and patted my hands on her face. "I just want you to be happy." I got the feeling that she wanted to say something more but we were interrupted when both my brothers came barging into the kitchen.
"This is the second time today I find you kissing a woman, you need help man."
When my mom laughed and turned around to check on the food again, I, very discreetly, flipped Chase the bird.
"The second time?" This coming from Eli with whom I was still plenty pissed at. "When was the first?"
"You won't believe-" As Chase recounted the story of how he found me and Harper kissing, I studied Eli. His entire body stiffened with irritation and for the life of me, I couldn't understand why.
I knew he had a reason for being angry all the damn time but why he had such a strong dislike for Harper I didn't know.
I didn't like it and I was going to tell him as much.
"What's your problem, man?" Annoyance had me stomping toward my brother with no regard to the fact that we had an audience. "First you make that shit remark last night and now you're pulling up your nose as if you're better than her. You're not!"
Not caring that I'd just yelled at him, Eli casually folded his arms in front of him and propped his shoulder against the wall. "My problem, brother," he said using the same tone he used whenever he was disciplining Molly. "Is simply this: That woman is hiding something. Did you know that there is no record of a Flynn Evans born to a Harper Evans?"
"You're screwed up in the head, you know that?" My voice was booming through my mom's kitchen but I couldn't help myself.
Shattered (Willow Creek Book 1) Page 8