by Aurora Rey
“So work is sucking up all her time.”
Joss shook her head. “That’s part of it. I’m not unreasonable, though. I know there are times when work is demanding, when a deadline is looming and a project has to get done. I don’t begrudge her that or expect her to be available whenever I am.”
“But?”
She sighed. “But it feels like a bigger shift than that. What seemed like a good balance is all out of whack.”
“All work and no play…”
“I’d finally started to believe we were on the same page and now I’m not at all sure.”
Ben gave her a sympathetic look. Perhaps he was remembering the last time Joss fell for someone whose priorities were different from hers. “You don’t think it’s just the aftermath?”
“I’m hoping that’s what it is. I know the whole incident really shook her. And in her work, being in the right isn’t always enough. This whole tenure thing is nuts.”
“So I’ve heard. So what are you going to do about it?”
Joss didn’t know. She’d been asking herself that for the last couple of weeks and had yet to come up with an answer. “Be patient, I guess, at least for a while. Now that her house is done and I’m working on other projects, we’d be recalibrating anyway. I want to give her time, be supportive.”
“Because there’s potential?”
Joss had to chuckle at his choice of words. When she’d been hesitant to date Olivia in the first place, he’d harped on the idea of not worrying too much about whether Olivia had potential to be The One. Letting go of the expectations had opened the door and Joss had come around to seeing just how much potential was there. Somewhere along the way, between talking about kids and building goat pens, she’d started planning their lives together. Just how much Joss had done that, how much she’d invested in it, hit her like a punch to the gut. She looked at Ben. “I think I’ve got myself way beyond potential.”
“Well, then I’m sure you’ll find a way to work it out. Olivia is special, what you have is special. You’d have to be blind not to see that.”
“Thanks, man. I appreciate that.”
“I just calls them as I sees them.”
After finishing their beers, Ben left to meet Becca and Joss started the walk over to Maxie’s. Their conversation—and the feelings it stirred up—played over and over in her mind. She wanted to be with Olivia. She wanted to build a life and a family and a home. Well, they’d already built a home. Only, it was just Olivia’s home.
Joss realized how easy it would be to think of the house on Davis Road as theirs. For one thing, it was a great house, exactly the kind of thing she’d choose. For another, she and Olivia had done so much of the work together. Between the carpet and wallpaper, the painting and the decorating, Olivia had been around. Unlike clients who made decisions from a distance and stayed away until there was a finished product, Olivia had her hand in things every step of the way.
And then they’d spent so much time together not working. Other than a casual lunch here and there, she wasn’t in the habit of having meals in a home she worked on. She sure as hell didn’t do sleepovers. Or bring Ethel along. Or get chummy with goats.
Having never dated a client, she wasn’t sure if all this was a normal reaction to mixing work with pleasure or if it was something unique to Olivia. It had to be Olivia. Not only could Joss see herself living in the house, she saw her future with Olivia. Olivia’s visions of tree houses and little feet had become her own, along with big family barbecues and morning after morning of waking up with the woman she loved.
Joss had already started thinking about moving in with Olivia. She’d thought about proposing, too. The last couple of weeks had put a bit of a damper on that, but the thoughts were still there. She needed a sign, something that told her Olivia was all in. Joss didn’t know what that would be, but she hoped she’d know it when she saw it.
Maxie’s was hopping. People waited outside for tables and crowded the bar, sipping drinks and sampling raw oysters. She didn’t see Olivia anywhere, so she put her name in with the hostess and stepped back outside. The evening air was cold and snow was in the forecast, but it hadn’t started yet. People came and went, but still no sign of Olivia. Joss pulled out her phone to check the time and realized she’d missed a text from her.
Fell into a conversation with chair of ACC, who’s also on Tenure & Promotion! Amazing luck, but just finishing now. Sorry. Dinner still?
The text had come in just a few minutes before. Joss was working on a reply when the hostess came out to say their table was ready. Knowing it would take Olivia at least twenty minutes to get to the restaurant from campus, she apologized to the woman and told her to give the table to the next people in line. She’d suddenly lost her appetite.
Restaurant packed. I’ll meet you back at your house.
She’d typed “at home” and then corrected herself. This sure as hell wasn’t the sign she was hoping for.
*
Olivia read the text from Joss and frowned. She couldn’t tell for sure, but it seemed like Joss was irritated. She hoped not.
The ACC meeting had, as predicted, run long. Afterward, Arun Dutta, who was from the Physics Department and chaired ACC, had come up to her. He was welcoming and friendly, asking about her background and how long she’d been at the university. It was only after talking for a while that she learned he was also on the Tenure and Promotion Committee. It wasn’t like she would—or even could—campaign for herself, but knowing members of the committee couldn’t hurt. They’d chatted for nearly an hour and Olivia completely lost track of time.
She walked to her car trying to think of how she could make it up to Joss. A good starting point was probably dinner. She called an order in to the Chinese place in Collegetown, knowing the food would be ready by the time she got there to pick it up.
Olivia pulled into the driveway, relieved to see Joss’s truck there. She grabbed the bag of food and made her way inside. When she walked in the front door, Joss switched off the television and stood.
“I feel so bad about our dinner plans. I thought I’d bring a peace offering of General Tso’s and dumplings.”
Joss sighed, but she did crack a smile. “If there’s shrimp lo mein in there, too, I suppose we could work it out.”
Olivia grinned. “But of course.”
She walked to the kitchen and set down the bag, got out plates. When Joss came in behind her, she turned her attention and wrapped her arms around Joss’s neck. “Forgive me?”
“I wasn’t mad in the first place.”
“Oh, admit it. You were annoyed. It’s okay to say so.”
Joss sighed again. She was sighing a lot lately. “I’m really not. I’m…I guess if anything, I’m worried.”
Olivia stepped back and gave her a puzzled look. “Worried? Why would you be worried? I was just on campus.”
“Not worried about your safety. I know campus is safe.”
“Worried about what, then?” Getting Joss to open up was like pulling teeth. Why was she being so vague?
“You’ve been spending so much time at work. I thought that after you were cleared, things would settle down. Instead, work seems to be getting even more of your attention.”
Olivia put her fists on her hips. “Honey, I told you about my plan. You knew I was signing up for this.”
“I know. I guess I underestimated just how consuming it would be.”
In the whole time they’d been together, Joss had never been clingy. Olivia found it odd that she’d start now. She couldn’t decide if it was cute or irksome. She settled on the former, closing the distance between them and putting her arms around Joss’s waist. “Aw, you miss me.”
Olivia thought that would earn her a smile but it didn’t. Instead, Joss frowned. “It’s not like that.”
Olivia fought to keep her patience. “Well, what is it, then? I am a woman of many talents, but reading minds isn’t one of them.”
Joss weighed her o
ptions. Telling Olivia how she felt might clear the air. It might also start a colossal fight. Did she want to risk it? “I guess I miss you some.”
Olivia kissed her. “That’s very sweet.”
“With the house done, both of us are having our attention pulled in other directions.” Joss didn’t add the fact that this terrified her.
“I know what you mean. I’m so glad the house is done, but I miss working on it together. It was fun, but it was also what brought us together.”
Joss cringed inwardly. Great, now Olivia thought she missed working on the house together. She did miss working side by side on projects, but that wasn’t the point. Joss felt like the moment for baring her soul had passed. “It’s all good. Let’s eat before things get cold.”
“Yes. I’m starving.”
Olivia went about filling their plates from the takeout containers. Joss poured wine, not having the heart to say she wasn’t the least bit hungry.
“Was that a football game you had on when I got home?”
“Yeah. Nothing exciting. LA Tech at Rice.”
“That’s okay. I’m not picky. Shall we put it back on?”
Joss decided the game would be preferable to talking, even if it was a snoozer. “Sure.”
By the time they crawled into bed, Olivia was lamenting how exhausted she was. Rather than bothered, Joss was relieved that Olivia wasn’t feeling amorous. She took some ibuprofen for the headache that had been simmering at the base of her neck and joined her. When Joss finally fell asleep, it was after midnight and the questions were still swirling around her mind.
>Chapter Thirty
The next morning, Joss woke with the same headache she’d had the night before. She took two more ibuprofen and downed a cup of coffee in addition to filling her travel mug. She kissed Olivia and headed out to the Patel house, dreading having to deal with the consultation and walk through with such pounding in her head.
She wasn’t sure if it was the coffee or the pills, but by the time she arrived at the site, she felt better. Mr. and Mrs. Patel were very friendly. And with their three kids approaching their teens, they were desperate for a space for the kids to hang out with their friends. Basement remodels weren’t Joss’s favorite, but the Patels were going all out. In addition to finishing the space, they were putting in a bedroom, a bathroom, an efficiency kitchen, and a media room.
After talking with them, Joss realized they were essentially looking for an in-law apartment. They wanted a space for the kids, but they also needed a place for their parents to stay when they visited from India. Since those visits lasted a month or more, having more than a guest room was important.
They had ideas, but were content to let Joss make a lot of the decisions. And while they didn’t give Joss a blank check, doing the job well and quickly were clearly their top priorities. By the time she left, Joss had a vision for the project and a two-week window when the family would be traveling to the West Coast to get started on the work.
When she was done with the consultation, Joss drove back to the shop to work up a more precise rendering of her plan and start making a supply list. Although the task could have waited until Monday, she liked getting things on paper while they were still fresh in her mind. The office was quiet and she worked quickly. Within a couple of hours, she had everything sorted out, including a bright and functional laundry room where the washer and dryer currently sat. It would only add a small percentage to the overall budget, and she thought the Patels would go for it.
Feeling pleased, she drove back to Olivia’s in a good mood. Maybe she’d overreacted the night before. Olivia was doing her best, just as Joss was doing hers. It was hard to fault Olivia for not giving family priority when there was no family yet that needed tending. She’d give it time and see how things went, at least for the next few weeks. She’d be plenty busy anyway.
She walked in the house to find Olivia standing in the kitchen, staring into space. She was wearing leggings and an oversize sweater; her hair was pulled into a clip that exposed her neck. The stir of arousal was both exciting and reassuring.
“Hello, gorgeous.”
Olivia turned and blinked at her a few times. Clearly her mind had been elsewhere. “Hi.”
Olivia smiled, but Joss thought she could see a shadow of worry behind it. “Everything okay?”
“It is. I love you, you know.”
Joss smiled, more concerned rather than less. “I love you, too.”
“I’m sorry the last few weeks have been so hectic. I know I’ve been putting more energy into work than into us.”
Joss relaxed a little. “It’s okay. I don’t need all your attention all the time.”
“Yeah, but I’ve hardly been giving you any.”
“I do love your attention, but I hope you know it’s not about that.”
Olivia raised a brow. “What do you mean?”
“I’m a big believer in balance—work, life, family. It’s felt a little lately like all your focus is on work. I worry about you burning out, you know?”
“That’s sweet. You’re sweet.”
“I mean, if you felt compelled to lavish me with attention, I wouldn’t say no.”
“Ah.”
“For your well-being, of course.”
“Of course.” Olivia closed the distance between them. She’d just started undoing the buttons of Joss’s shirt when her phone rang. “Shit.”
“What?”
Olivia took a step back and sighed. “That’s my mother.”
Joss had to laugh. “Answer it so you won’t have to call her back later. I’m not going anywhere.”
Olivia gave her a quick kiss. “You’re the best.”
Olivia snagged her phone and answered it. Joss headed to the living room so it wouldn’t seem like she was eavesdropping. She wandered over to the mantle she’d crafted from a reclaimed beam. Olivia might love the kitchen, but the living room was Joss’s favorite.
About fifteen minutes later, Olivia appeared. She looked shell-shocked. Joss’s first thought was that someone had died. “What’s wrong?”
“My parents are coming for a visit.”
Joss smiled, relieved. “That’s great. I’ve been hoping to have the chance to meet them. And they’ll get to see the house and all of your hard work.”
Olivia nodded, as though she was trying to convince herself that was true. “Yes, they will.”
“Are you not looking forward to it?” Joss got that she was unusually close to her parents because they worked together, but Olivia seemed to be on the complete opposite extreme. She knew Olivia and her parents weren’t close, but maybe it was worse than that.
“I am. Of course I am. They haven’t visited since I moved north, so it’s a bit of a surprise. That’s all.”
“They haven’t visited at all?”
“Well, it’s only been a couple of years. I went down for my youngest nephew’s christening. And I was in an apartment for a while, so I would have had to put them in a hotel. It just didn’t work out.”
Joss smiled again. “I think it’s great that they’re coming. When?”
“Thanksgiving.”
“Thanksgiving? That’s really soon.” It was in a week and a half, to be exact. Joss did her best to hide her surprise.
Olivia took a deep breath. “I know. They’ll fly in on Tuesday, then drive to New York City on Friday to take in a couple of shows. I think my mom might be more excited about doing her Christmas shopping in the city than anything else.”
Joss willed herself to stay positive. The more she learned about Olivia’s parents, the less she liked them. But still. They were Olivia’s parents. Meeting them was important. And seeing how Olivia was with them might answer some of the questions that had been nagging at her. All in all, it would be a good thing. It had to be. “The city does have a certain thrill. But they’ll be here for the holiday. That’s so nice. I’m sure my mom would be happy to have them if you all wanted to come over for dinner.”
A look of alarm passed over Olivia’s face.
“Or not.”
Olivia must have realized she’d made a face. She quickly backpedaled. “It’s such a sweet offer. And as much as I’d love to spend Thanksgiving with your family, I’m not sure it would be ideal.”
“Okay.” Joss was trying to make sense of the hesitation and the real meaning behind it.
“They can be kind of high maintenance. I love them, but I’m not sure inflicting them on your family at a big holiday dinner is the way to go.”
Joss nodded. “I understand.”
“Maybe we could do something casual on Wednesday night. Here, even. Drinks and hors d’oeuvres.”
Joss loved finger food and cocktails as much as the next person, but it was the last thing she thought of when she thought of family. Maybe Olivia was right and colliding the worlds wasn’t such a good idea. “Sure. You can decide whether you want to invite my parents, too, or have it just be the four of us. Introduce them in small doses.”
Olivia chuckled. “That’s the phrase I usually use to talk about myself spending time with them. But yes, I think you’re right. Small doses.”
Olivia seemed genuinely happy with her new plan and Joss was relieved, mostly. “You just let me know what I can do to help you get ready.”
Olivia smiled for real. “Thanks. I know I’ve said so already, but you really are the best. I’m going to go make some lists. That always helps.”
Joss nodded. “How about I go out and take care of the goats. I haven’t seen them in a couple of days, and since we’re supposed to get some snow tonight, we want to make sure they’ve got enough bedding to stay warm and cozy.”
“They’ll be thrilled to see you.” Olivia walked over and kissed her. “I’ll be in my lovely office that is no longer a makeshift bedroom.”
Joss wanted the whole thing to feel homey—Olivia preparing for guests while she tended things around the house. Something was off, though. As much as she wanted them to feel like a team, it seemed like Olivia was just happy to have another pair of hands. Maybe she was overreacting. Joss put her coat on and headed out to the barn.