Box Set #3: The Serenity Deception: [The 4 book 3rd Adventure of Egg and the Hameggattic Sisterhood]

by Robert Iannone

  “You’re not here to guide us, are you?” interrupted Sylvia before the conversation could meander too far into the annoying.

  “Guide you where?”

  “Wherever it is we’re supposed to go.”

  “How would I know where you’re supposed to go?”

  Now it was Egg’s turn to interrupt. “So why are you here?”

  “I’m here in my official capacity as Dream Whisperer.”

  “Which is what?”

  “What witch?”

  “What?”

  “That’s what I’d like to know.”

  “What is?”

  “What witch?”

  “STOP,” yelled Aeri’elle. “This isn’t getting us anywhere.”

  “If you would tell me where you want to get to, maybe I can help,” offered the cat creature.

  “That’s the point . . . we don't know where we want to get to. We don’t know where we’re supposed to go,” answered Egg trying to keep her voice calm.

  “Then it doesn't much matter which way you go, now does it?”

  Egg opened her mouth to say something rude but stopped. Dorothy was right. Maybe these surreal dreams had no purpose other than to walk about and meet strange beings.

  “Dorothy.”

  “Yes?”

  Restating Egg’s original question, the Thought Weaver said, “My name is Spirit. Can you tell us what a Dream Whisperer does?”

  “Of course I can.” They waited but the creature said nothing.

  “Would you?”

  “Sure. I’m here to tell you about your challenge.”

  “What challenge?” asked Egg who began to get goose bumps.

  Dorothy pulled off her hat, reached inside and took out a piece of paper. “Hear ye, Hear ye . . . the contest between the legendary Hameggattic Sisterhood and . . . and . . . hmmm.”

  “Hmmm what?”

  “It’s blank. The name of your challenger should be right here,” and she pointed to a blank space on the paper. “But it’s not. That’s highly irregular.”

  Egg turned to her sisters. “Obviously it’s the big cheese. She’s not too clever, is she?”

  “If I may continue?”

  “Yes, you may.”

  “Most of the rest is meaningless legal gobbledygook. The important thing is the Sisterhood has five hours to find the key. Furthermore, at the end of each hour, one or more of you will be trans-configurated and become part of the problem and not the solution. Any questions?”

  The girls looked from one to another. All they saw were blank expressions in each other’s faces. Egg shook her head and turned back to Dorothy. “We have absolutely no idea what you just said.”

  “Shall I read it again?” asked the Whisperer helpfully.

  “NO. What you can do is try to explain it to us. First, what is the key we’re looking for?”

  “No idea.”

  “Where do we look to find it?”

  “No idea.”

  “What does trans whatever that word mean? How do sisters go from solution to the problem?”

  “Here I can help. Trans-configurated means that they will change into other characters. Once they do, whoever is left can’t call on them to help . . . because they’ll be working for the other team.”

  Egg’s goose bumps got worse. “I don’t like it. This is just crazy and now I’ve got goose bumps on my goose bumps. I’m going to call Tee.” She waited to see if anyone would argue. No one did. “TEE’KA.”

  Nothing.

  “TEE’KA”.

  Nothing.

  “TEE, help please.”

  Their hostess materialized in front of them. “Yes, Egg?”

  “We want out of this simulation. You were right, it’s way too weird.”

  Tee’ka flickered. “As you requested, the safety protocols have been disengaged. Please enjoy your adventure. I’m sure it will be memorable.” With that, she blinked out.

  “Tee . . . hey, Tee. Come back.” But the girl didn’t. Egg turned to her friends and asked, “What just happened?”

  “Egg, her wand . . . the tip was red,” said BreeZee.

  “NO.”

  “Yeah, it was,” confirmed Soo.

  Flying Girl looked at her sisters and spoke a heartfelt “Uh-oh.”

  Before they could discuss this unpleasant turn of events, the freakish looking Dorothy said, “Well, if there’s nothing else, have an excitingly spirited competition.” With that, she disappeared. A moment later, her head materialized and she added, “Just a personal observation . . . the Queen of Hearts is nuttier than a pecan pie, meaner than a junk yard dog and scarier than the Wicked Witch. If you have the chance to meet her . . . DON’T.”

  *****

  “Are we in trouble?”

  “Pretty much.”

  “That wasn’t a question. It was an observation” clarified Bl’azzz.

  “So what now?” Soo asked Egg.

  “Anybody have a watch so we can tell when the next hour is up?”

  No one did.

  “Anyone have any idea what the key we’re looking for might be?”

  No one did.

  “Anybody want to guess which way we should go?”

  No one did.

  “Anybody know what Tee meant when she said the safety protocols are off?”

  This time Syl did. “I think it means that when we get hurt in this simulation, it’s for keeps.”

  “Meaning?”

  “Meaning if we break a leg here, our leg will be broken back in the real world.”

  “You’re not suggesting,” asked Aeri’elle, “that if we die in the simulation, we really die?”

  Six mouths dropped open at that question.

  Egg recovered from her shock to ask, “Syl, explain it again to me? About the safety protocols.”

  “This is an amusement world. No one is supposed to get hurt, except maybe a pretend hurt in a simulation. I think Tee’ka was trying to tell us that the programming that protects our real selves from anything that happens in here isn’t working. Somebody turned it off. So, if I cut my finger right now . . . my real finger back in the room would start to bleed.”

  “That can’t be right.”

  “Why not?”

  “How can a pretend hurt in here become a real one out there?”

  “Egg, this is all extraordinarily advanced technology. We’re not smart enough to answer that question,” admitted BreeZee.

  “Well, then this certainly isn’t a game anymore. The big cheese has turned it into a real life and death battle. Worse, she can’t lose. Even if we win, there’s no way to prove that she’s behind this. Even worster . . . don’t you dare say that’s not a word . . . she sets the rules. And worstest of all, we don’t know what the rules are. We are totally and royally in a world of hurt. And it’s not even a real world, just a figment of my stupid brain.”

  “We have one thing going for us,” said Spirit. They looked at the girl with a glimmer of hope. “Since I’m a simulation of the real me, I should be able to use my mutant powers.”

  “Oh my gosh. You can look into the future and maybe give us some idea what we’re up against. Spirit, you just lifted mine.”

  “Lifted your what?”

  “My spirits.”

  “What?”

  “Forget it. Times a wasting. Do your magic.”

  “This will take ten maybe fifteen minutes. Your . . . um . . . silence would be appreciated.”

  “Mums the word.”

  “Wait a second,” interrupted BreeZee. “If the cheese finds out that you’re able to help us by looking into the future, I’d have to believe you’re going to be the first of us to be trans-configurated. So, we’re not going to get too many more opportunities like this.”

  That was greeted with dead silence.

  “Just saying.”

  *****

  In a very exotic spaceship orbiting unseen and undetected high above Laff’Alott, the lone occupant stared intently at her instrumen
tation. Then she giggled. A moment later, the giggle turned into a deep-throated laugh. And over the next few hours, she fully expected to laugh a lot.

  *****

  As Spirit began to weave her magic, Egg signaled for the other girls to follow her some distance away so they could talk without disturbing the Thought Weaver. “Listen, we don’t have a lot of time so let’s not waste any of it. While Spirit does her thing, I want Bree to sail above the trees and get a feel for what’s around us. Take Syl with you. Aeri’elle and Bl’azzz, you guys do the same thing. Maybe you can see something that might help us choose a direction.”

  “Great idea,” answered her Feminion.

  “What about me?” asked the sea serpent.

  “You’re with me . . . we need to guard Spirit while she’s in her trance. She’s too important to us to let the cheese do something bad to her.”

  “How long do we have?” asked Bl’azzz.

  “Till she comes out of her trance. No more than ten or fifteen minutes. And be sure to go in different directions. If you see anything . . . don’t get close to it. We don’t know who the bad guys are. Just look around and get back here in one piece. Any questions? Okay, go.”

  It took Spirit most of the fifteen precious minutes to come out of her dream-like state. “Oh, boy” were her first words as she opened her eyes.

  “That’s not encouraging.”

  “Wasn’t meant to be.” The girl looked around. “Where are the others?”

  “They’re up there . . .” and Egg pointed skyward, “. . . scouting the area.”

  “Good thinking.”

  “Well, spill it. What did you see?”

  Ignoring the incomprehensible phrase ‘spill it’, the other girl replied, “If the others won’t be long, I think I should wait till they return.”

  “Speaking of which,” said Soo, “here they come.”

  Bree and Syl landed first, followed by Bl’azzz. Everyone scanned the night sky looking for the other dragon. “Why don’t you call her?” suggested Sylvia.

  “How?”

  “We appear to have whatever we were wearing in real life. That includes our communications crystals.”

  “Hey, you’re right.”

  “Don’t sound so shocked,” teased her Feminion.

  “Not shocked, just a little surprised . . . in the nice way.”

  “Amazing.”

  “What is, Bree?”

  “We’re in the middle of what might very well be a life and death struggle, yet you two can still find time to kid each other. I stand in awe.”

  “Would someone please call big bird?” hissed Soo.

  “Oh yeah. Big bird, can you hear me?” asked Egg as she pressed her communications crystal.

  No response.

  “Big Bird? Aeri’elle?”

  No response.

  “Oh, drat . . . I’m getting goose bumps.”

  “Try it again,” insisted Bl’azzz.

  “Aeri’elle, it’s Egg. Where are you?”

  “Should I go find her?” offered Bl’azzz.

  “No. If something happened to her, it’ll probably happen to you.”

  “We can’t just leave her.”

  “Of course not. We’ll head in the direction she took. Which way was that?”

  Bl’azzz pointed.

  “We need to get a move on. Spirit, now would be a good time to tell us what you saw.”

  “I tried to follow the strands of the future for each of us. Only Egg had one that led out of this darkness.”

  “What does that mean – that I’m going to lose all of you in this . . . this . . . dream world?”

  “Remember, I see probable futures not certainty. And the answer is yes, only you have a high probable future that leads out of the darkness.”

  “But . . .”

  “Egg, just let her finish,” insisted Sylvia.

  “Sorry. Go ahead.”

  “When you get out of here, you will meet two girls. But they’re not what they seem.”

  “And that means what?”

  “They’re alive but not the way we are.”

  “Okay. Now you’re just creeping me out.”

  “Spirit, what did you see about the contest and the key?” asked BreeZee.

  “We need to find the Metropolis of the Crystalline Edifice . . . which shouldn’t surprise anyone when I say it looks a lot like the Crystal Mountain. After all, this all comes from Egg’s memories.”

  “I think you mean Emerald City . . . that was where Dorothy went in the Wizard of Oz.”

  “What’s that?” asked Bl’azzz.

  “The children’s story I mentioned before. Very famous.”

  “Does it have a happy ending?”

  Egg looked at Syl. “Yeah.”

  Soo asked Spirit, “We’re not going to go through seven lands again, are we?”

  “No. There were no special lands as you put it. There will be any number of weird . . . um . . . characters that will try to stop us or if that fails to confuse us.”

  “Confuse us?”

  “With riddles or make us think we’re doing things wrong when we’re not.”

  “So we just ignore them?”

  “I don’t think it’s that easy. They’re very convincing. Some of what they say will be true, some false. No easy way for us to know which is which.”

  “So what’s the key that we’re looking for?”

  “It’s not a key like for a lock. It’s a key like for a puzzle or mystery or a map.”

  “That’s helpful . . . somewhat. Anything else?”

  “I kept hearing a voice. It was a girl’s voice and she was laughing.”

  “That’s what you said when we were on Zynn-Zaz’zia. A girl who laughed a lot.”

  “Definitely the same one.”

  “Curiouser and Curiouser.”

  *****

  “Do we fly or walk?” asked BreeZee.

  “Flying got Aeri’elle into trouble so I’m not inclined to do that again.”

  “You didn’t happen to see any rivers going our way,” asked Soo hopefully.

  “We didn’t,” answered Syl.

  “Sorry, sea slug. None,” added her friend.

  “Any rivers on Paradox?” the serpent asked Spirit, thinking about their next adventure.

  “Many. Your aquatic talents should prove most useful.”

  “Great. Can’t wait.”

  “Okay, let’s get going. Stay close. If you get separated, use the communications crystals. Bl’azzz, your hot breath goes first. I’m next. Then Spirit, Syl, Bree and Soo. Questions?” She didn’t wait for an answer. “Let’s move.”

  *****

  Unfortunately, the direction that Aeri’elle had flown led them through the heart of the graveyard. The good news was that the fog was thinning out and they could see more clearly.

  The bad news was the fog was thinning out and they could see more clearly. Shadows in a graveyard were one thing; seeing graves and tombstones in all their eerie clarity was another.

  They walked quickly, determined to get away from the dead as fast as possible. As they approached, some sort of abandon building or chapel, Bl’azzz came to a sudden stop. “Egg . . .,” she whispered, “look at that,” and she pointed to one particular gravestone a few feet away . . .

  “What about it?”

  “It looks a lot newer than the rest, for one thing. And isn’t than a broken egg painted on it?”

  Everyone gathered round to take a closer look.

  “At least there’s no inscription,” commented BreeZee. “Like ‘Here Lies Egg, Died of a Broken Shell’ . . . or something.”

  Egg rolled her eyes.

  “Actually, it’s a good sign” said Sylvia. “It means that we’re headed in the right direction.”

  “You-know-who obviously wanted us to see it. Good thinking, Syl.”

  “Let’s keep going,” urged Soo.

  “Right. Okay . . . umm . . . let’s go up the steps.”

  �
��I knew you were going to say that,” moaned the serpent who despised steps.

  “Sorry, but there’s no way around and no way I’m going in there,” and she pointed at the dark and foreboding building.

  Chapter 9 – The Clown & the Lion

  They got to the top and what they saw was a bit freaky . . .

  “Oh my gosh.”

  It was more of the graveyard, but running through it was a blood-red brick path. In the moonlight (the fog seemed to be gone), it glowed ominously.

  They stopped and stared.

  “That’s not at all inviting,” observed Bree.

  “Got that right,” answered someone.

  “Egg, look at that gravestone” and Spirit pointed to one on their left.

  They walked slowly up to it and stopped.

  “I don’t recognize the writing,” said Bl’azzz.

  “It’s in Earth English . . . don’t forget this is all from the disturbingly creepy and delightfully zany imagination of our dearest leader,” explained Sylvia.

  “Would one of you please read it for the rest of us?” requested Bree impatiently.

  “Sorry. It says . . .

  There was a young lady who laughed and who flew

  She had six sisters who followed her true

  She gave them adventures, and fame they did earn

  But humility and modesty is a lesson they must learn.

  “Well, that can’t be about us,” said Soo with a goofy grin. “We’re unbelievably and unabashedly unpretentious.”

  “Nice,” complimented her friend.

  “It’s a gift.”

  “Hang on there’s more but it’s hard to read.” She reached down and wiped away some dirt covering the wording. “It says ‘The best magic is a good laugh but not all laughs are magic.”

  “What the heck does that mean?” asked her friend.

  No one could even venture a guess.

  “What’s the significance of the unpleasant face?” inquired Spirit.

  “That’s a clown,” explained Egg.

  “Which is what? You mentioned them before.”

  “Um . . . a clown is . . . um . . . tell them, Syl.” Funny how we use words, know inside our heads what they mean, but can’t really explain it to someone else.