Shade

by Jamie Begley

  Shade repeated the words after he placed the wedding band on her finger.

  Lucky then turned to Lily.

  “Lily, place your ring on John’s left hand and repeat after me.

  “John, I give you this ring as a symbol of my love.”

  Lily repeated the words, placing the wedding band on his finger. When she finished, Shade gripped her hand in his.

  “Lily and John, you have now exchanged rings and vows, marrying in the presence of God, your family, and friends. By the authority vested in me by the state of Kentucky, I pronounce you husband and wife.

  “You may kiss the bride.” Lucky smiled as he finished the ceremony.

  Shade pulled Lily closer, lowering his mouth to kiss his wife for the first time.

  * * *

  The freezing guests left immediately after the ceremony while drinking the cups of hot coffee or cocoa that had been waiting for them inside the church. Shade invited only Lucky and Killyama, who was the only psycho of the bitch pack able to attend, back to the clubhouse for the private reception; both had refused. Lucky had Christmas Eve service that evening, and Killyama wanted to get back to Jamestown before the weather made the roads even worse.

  Lily and the other women climbed in Beth’s SUV, while Shade and Train were riding with Rider in his truck.

  Train had climbed into the back seat when Killyama came out of the church, going to her car, but then Shade and Rider turned, startled, as Train jumped out of the truck and approached the woman before she could get in her car.

  Shade rolled his window down, unashamedly listening to the budding argument.

  “Why are you ignoring my calls?” Train asked.

  Killyama didn’t answer his question, asking one of her own. “How did you get my fucking number? I sure as hell never gave it to you!”

  “I asked Stud for it.”

  “Bastard.”

  Shade wondered who she was calling the name—Stud or Train.

  “So, why didn’t you answer my calls?”

  “Why in the fuck would I want to talk to you? I wanted a fuck, and you gave it to me. Then, when I asked if I could come to one of your parties, you said no. If you thought your dick was too good for me, then you shouldn’t have given it to me.”

  “That wasn’t what I meant!” Train snarled.

  “You had your shot, but you didn’t want it. Now, fuck off.”

  Shade watched as Killyama got in her car, ignoring Train who was still trying to talk to her. Train had to jump out of the way to avoid being hit by her before finally climbing back into the truck.

  “That bitch is crazy.”

  “Nope, that’s her friend,” Rider laughed, putting the truck in gear and backing up.

  A car sped into the church parking lot, barely missing Rider as he continued to back up.

  “Who the fuck was that?” Rider asked angrily.

  Shade looked out his window at the woman getting furiously out of her car and slamming the door shut.

  “Betsey Watson.” Shade turned his back to the window so she couldn’t see him.

  “Why is she here? The wedding’s over,” Rider asked, pulling out onto the road toward the clubhouse.

  “She didn’t come to see the wedding; she’s here to see Knox.”

  * * *

  With everyone back at the clubhouse, the men ended up carrying the women up the steps since they were so icy. Then several of the men went back out to clear them and the pathway for anyone who came by later.

  As soon as Shade set Lily back on her feet, she escaped to their bedroom to change while Shade and the men were standing at the bar, congratulating him with shots.

  Shade saw Lily standing on the steps a few minutes later, watching him with a curious expression on her face, and went to her. She had changed into a green sweater and brown slacks. His hands circled her waist, lifting her off the last two steps and holding her against his chest.

  “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “Watching you.” She smiled, touching his cheek.

  “Why?” Shade smiled down at her.

  Lily’s face got solemn. “Shade, we need to talk. We should have talked before we were married this morning.”

  Her serious tone wiped his smile away. Shade didn’t want anything bad to tarnish their memory of today.

  “Not today.”

  “But I really need to tell you—”

  “Not today, okay? Today is Christmas Eve—our wedding day—and we’re not going to talk about anything else except that today.”

  “Okay.” Lily gave in to his demand.

  “I’m going to go get out of this get-up. I’m never going to live this down.”

  “I think you’ll survive,” Lily teased.

  Shade bent down, brushing his lips with hers, but before he could start up the stairs, a knock sounded on the door behind them.

  Shade gave her a quick grin. “I have another surprise for you,” he said, turning to open the door.

  As it opened, Shade caught the second Lily saw Penni standing on the porch, her whole face lighting up.

  When Penni saw Shade, she threw herself into his arms, something Shade hated yet decided to let go since it was his wedding day.

  “You big doofus. Only you would give me a day’s notice to get here. My stupid flight got cancelled, and I didn’t think I would ever get through the roads from Lexington. I didn’t even know you two were seeing each other. How come neither of you told me?”

  Shade set Penni back on the floor. “Slow down, Penni. If you hadn’t been so occupied with your new job, you would have known,” he told her.

  It hadn’t taken Penni long to figure out the real reason he had wanted her to switch colleges. The nights he had spent watching their dorm room had both concerned her and provided ample opportunity to tease him, which was why he hadn’t told her his and Lily’s relationship had progressed until he had called and left a voicemail that they were getting married.

  “Lily!” Penni squealed when she saw her from behind Shade and then grabbed her, pulling her into a tight hug. “I missed seeing you in your wedding dress. I was supposed to be there,” she wailed.

  “It’s all right. Razer took a video for us.” Lily said with mild resentment in her tone.

  Penni’s eyes flashed her hurt, but she wasn’t one to take anything without giving it right back.

  “I know you’re probably mad at me for not telling you Shade is my brother, but he threatened to take the car back if I told.”

  Shade’s face went blank at his sister’s revealing words then tuned the two women out as they chatted until Lily corrected his status as Penni’s half-brother.

  “That doesn’t matter. Our families both get along. It wasn’t an ugly divorce. His mom was just sick of moving every couple of years. Our parents are pretty cool, our dad especially.”

  “We’ll save that for another day. He couldn’t make it to the wedding. He and my stepmother are in Florida, taking a long vacation. He just retired,” Shade explained to Lily. “Why don’t you take Penni into the kitchen and let her see everyone while I go get changed.” He didn’t need more of the lies he had spilled to Penni unraveling like the one he had used to prevent her from running to Penni when she had first come to the clubhouse.

  The girls continued talking as they made their way to the kitchen, and Shade went to change out of his uncomfortable suit.

  When Shade came back down, everyone was together in the kitchen. They spent the next hour eating and talking, and Shade found out Penni’s boss had connections to the Predators, the club which had come through town and Lily had acted friendly with after they had helped her when Gaige had gone after her at the fair.

  Shade put his foot down and demanded Penni to stay away from them, but he could tell she was hiding something from him about them. Their bickering about it continued for some time and then settled down as everyone talked throughout the rest of dinner. When the meal was over, the women left to go to Christmas Eve service
while the men got busy.

  Chapter 66

  “We finally done?” Knox asked, coming in the kitchen door to see the brothers all sitting around.

  “Yeah, we’re done.” Shade tossed him a beer as he leaned against the kitchen counter.

  They had just finished hauling his bedroom set from the basement to his new house. He was going to surprise Lily when she returned from Christmas Eve service.

  Shade smiled.

  “Damn, I don’t even want to know what he’s thinking about,” Train told Viper.

  “Can I help it if I’m in a good mood on my wedding day?” Shade asked.

  “Fuck no. I just wished it would last,” Train laughed.

  “About as long as you lasted with Killyama?”

  Train’s laughter died abruptly. “What in the hell do you mean by that?”

  “Stud told me when I called to invite them all to the wedding that Killyama has been telling anyone who will listen that”—Shade had to smother his laughter—“you’re a little quick on the draw.”

  Train stood so fast his chair fell backward. “That bitch! I’ll show her how long I can last. Next time I fuck her, I’m going to make her beg me for twenty minutes before I let her come.”

  Viper pushed him back down in his chair after picking it up. “You aren’t going anywhere. I’m not starting a war with the Destructors and The Blue Horsemen just because you can’t perform,” Viper joked, sitting down next to Train.

  “Oh, he performed, just not long enough,” Shade reminded Viper helpfully.

  Train turned red, clenching his fists on the table. “I’m going to pay her back some way,” he promised.

  “Brother, I don’t think you’re up to the job,” Knox joked.

  Train went for Knox, having enough of the kidding, but Viper and Shade held him back as the women returned. Train sat sulkily back down at the table, drinking his beer.

  Shade looked for Lily and didn’t see her.

  Beth came in the kitchen, wrapping her arms around Razer from behind.

  “Where’s Lily?” Shade asked her.

  Beth nodded out the backdoor. “She wanted to go for a walk before she came inside. Shade, Georgia gave her a hard time at church tonight.” Shade started to question her, but Beth raised her hand. “Lily handled it. She had Georgia running out of the church.”

  “She’s fired,” Razer snarled before Shade could.

  “I’m not going to argue—Georgia stepped over the line tonight—but, Shade, I don’t think that’s all that’s bothering Lily. When we were in my car today, she asked the women who the worst one in the club was.” Beth looked toward Train. “She thought it was Train, but she figured out it was you.”

  The women in the room looked guiltily away from him.

  Shade nodded, going toward the door. “Thanks, Beth. I’ll handle it.

  “See, Lily knows I can last a long time. I’ll get her to tell those bitches the truth—” Train broke off when Shade turned back to stare at him.

  Train hastily changed his mind when he saw Shade’s expression. “Then again, maybe I won’t.”

  Shade went out the backdoor.

  “I told you his good mood wasn’t going to last,” Train muttered.

  * * *

  Shade found Lily leaning against the front porch post of their house, staring out at the mountains.

  “Why are you out here?” Shade asked, coming to the bottom of the steps, looking up at her.

  “You couldn’t have picked a better spot for your home. The view is … perfect. When I stand here from this viewpoint, I feel like I could reach out and touch the sky. It sounds silly, but it’s so high here I think God might hear me a little better.”

  She gave him wry smile. “When I was a little girl, I would pray and pray at night. My real mother wasn’t much of a church-goer. If it wasn’t for my friends, I wouldn’t even have known there was a God. They told me about Him. My mother didn’t believe, explaining as much to me.”

  “Lily, stop. I told you, not today. Not on our wedding day,” Shade begged her. He didn’t want her dream day spoiled with nightmares from her past.

  “I have to tell you today, Shade. Today’s the day you made me your wife.” Her arms circled the post she was leaning against.

  Shade wanted her to lean on him for the strength she needed, but he remained at the bottom of the steps, sensing her need to talk. She thought he didn’t know the woman he had married; however, he had known from the first time he had looked in her eyes.

  “I didn’t know what a daddy was, so my friends tried to explain it to me. When they told me, I started crying because I wanted one. I didn’t have a lot—no dolls or toys—but I never cried for those. But when they told me what a daddy was, I really wanted one of those. My friends didn’t know what to do, but then one of them ran into her apartment and came out with a Bible, and they told me about God, how He was everyone’s Father. I would talk to Him whenever … whenever I needed Him. I don’t know if He could hear me. I don’t think I was close enough.

  “That’s why I love the mountains. I feel closer to God. When I came to the mountains, He gave me parents who loved me. He gave me Beth, and He gave me you, Shade. My husband.

  “Do you know why I didn’t want to have sex with my husband before I married? Because I wanted it to be clean and new, because I’m dirty, unclean—”

  “Don’t you ever fucking say that again!” Shade’s foot came up on the first step.

  “It’s the truth, Shade. I’ve slept with more men than any woman in that house, and you deserve to know that. I can’t give you my virginity; I lost it long ago and everything else from that life that I forgot until Halloween night.”

  “I wish you had never remembered.” Shade’s voice held all the anguish he felt at what she had lived through.

  “I don’t. It was destroying me, Shade.”

  “There was nothing worth remembering.”

  His harsh words had her straightening from the pole.

  “Oh, yes, there was. There were three little girls who were like sisters. When my mother would finally crash and sleep, she would take me to a babysitter. I know my mom didn’t pay her; she spent all her money on anything other than me. I was raised with two beautiful little girls. They loved me enough to see that I had food to eat, that I had toys to play with, that I had a normal touch. They would hold my hand constantly when we went out. They were constantly afraid they would lose me.

  “We would sit on the playground and pretend that we would run away when we grew old enough. Vida was sweet and sensitive. She loved animals. She wanted to live on a farm. Sawyer was more adventurous. She wanted to have fun. She chose Disneyland, and I wanted to see the Northern Lights.”

  “That was why you wanted to go to Alaska,” Shade wondered aloud softly.

  “I had the farthest to run,” she said softly. “That night we were looking through those books must have triggered a memory. My mind was trying to remind me of my past. A past I don’t belong to any more than I belong here.”

  She stood straight, standing on the top step, looking down at him. “You thought I was a young, innocent woman, that I’ve never touched alcohol. You don’t know that I was sold for pocket change. I’ve done things which make me sick. How can I belong anywhere when I know how disgusting I am?”

  “Lily, look at that house behind you. I built that house for you—every room, this porch, these steps, is for you, for us and the children we will have.” He put every ounce of the passion and love he felt for her in his voice so she would understand her past wasn’t a burden she had to carry alone anymore.

  “I love you. When I say it, I don’t say it lightly. I say it because, when I look at you, I see an angel who God let slip through His fingers to leave behind just for me.

  “Lily, you belong. You belong to me. You will always belong to me.” Shade walked up the steps, sweeping her up into his arms. “Always.”

  He took her to the front door of their house, carrying he
r inside and slamming the door behind them. Reaching beside the door, he balanced her while he flipped on the lights.

  Lily stared around the living room filled with furniture. “When did you do this?” she asked, seeing the furniture they had just picked out the day before.

  “While you were in church tonight. The brothers and I busted our balls getting this done while you were gone.”

  “How did you get the furniture delivered so fast?”

  “I threatened Leonard, but I also gave him a big tip,” Shade said ruefully.

  “We did good,” Lily said, trying to wiggle down so she could look closer at her house. “Let me down; I want to see the kitchen,” Lily said, exasperated.

  “Later. I’m going to show you the bedroom first.” His gave her a wicked grin, and she grinned back, laying her head on his shoulders.

  Shade took her upstairs to the bedroom where the door was already open. He carried her through, setting her down in their new bedroom. There were candles set in various places throughout the room, giving it a soft glow, and the bed was made up with the covers pulled down. On the bed was the present she had bought Shade the day before.

  “Beth made me promise to have it on the bed waiting for you,” he told her when her eyes fixated on it.

  “What time is it?” Lily asked.

  Shade glanced down at his watch. “Eleven-thirty.”

  “That’s close enough. I think it’s time I gave you your Christmas present,” she said mischievously.

  Lily went to the bed, picking the package up, and then headed toward the bathroom.

  “Wait, I thought you were going to let me open it?” Shade asked, confused. If it was meant for him, why was she taking it away?

  “I will. Give me ten minutes.” Lily disappeared into the bathroom.

  Shade took his clothes off while she was in the shower then laid down on the bed to wait for her. The bathroom door opened some time later, and he saw his wife standing in the doorway.

  “That is the best present I’ve ever had. Come here and let me open it.” His intense eyes didn’t lift from the gift she had bought him.

  The white lace corset she was wearing had no straps. It hugged her chest in sweetheart cups which pushed her full breasts up and showed how tiny her waist was in comparison to her flared hips. The lace ended just above the tiny white lace panties.