The Knowledge of Love (The Nememiah Chronicles Book 4)

by D. S. Williams

  “Don't worry, we've got it under control,” he grumbled. “Right now, I'm more concerned about you and the baby. Damn fool, what the hell where you thinking, going to Romania like the female equivalent of GI Joe?”

  “I am the female equivalent of GI Joe,” I mumbled sleepily. “I just need to sleep for a little while…” Jerome continued to work over me, but my eyes drifted closed and I was powerless to stop it.

  Chapter 36: Due Dates

  Drifting back to awareness I became conscious of a couple of things, and they both seemed remarkably pleasant after the horrors of the past few days. Firstly, there was warm skin pressed against my back, the warmth like a blanket and following the contours of my body where I lay curled on my side. Secondly, there was an arm draped around my waist and a warm hand cradled against my stomach. I stretched luxuriously, blinking and trying to get a handle on where I was.

  Conal's arm tightened protectively around my waist and he kissed my cheek. “Hey, Charlotte,” he whispered huskily.

  Rolling over slowly, I faced him and looked up into his eyes. “Are you okay?”

  Conal nodded, his black eyes warm. “I still can't believe you three women got into Sfantu Drâghici and got us out.

  “We didn't do it on our own.”

  “Close enough.”

  My gaze flickered down his chest, inspecting the injuries he'd been subjected too. His wounds were healed, only red scars remaining where he'd been so badly tortured, the skin red and shiny. The bruises remained, but they looked better than they had, turning from black and blue to yellowish in color. “Your legs, they're healed?”

  Conal nodded, his eyes filled with warmth. “Fine, Sugar. So are the ribs and the fingers. I told you I'd be okay. Jerome's got me on antibiotics to ensure the infection is cleared up, but other than that, I'm good.”

  “I was so frightened. I thought he was going to kill you,” I whispered, wrapping my arm around Conal's waist and burying my head against his chest.

  “You didn't look very frightened, blasting your way into that place and taking on Archangelo and Arawn,” he murmured against my hair. “I was absolutely terrified. For you.”

  For a long moment we held one another close, relishing being in each other's arms before Conal spoke again. “He could have raped you, Charlotte.”

  I met his eyes, trembling a little. “He didn't.”

  Conal sighed, brushing his fingers through my hair. “What you did, it was crazy. You could have been raped… or killed.” He drew in a ragged breath. “And I couldn't have done a damn thing to stop it from happening.”

  I raised my hand, tracing my fingers across the scar on his cheek. “I'm safe. You're safe. They're the only things which matter.”

  Conal dropped his lips over mine, brushing across them lightly. “I love you for what you did. But if you ever try a stunt like that again, I'm going to kick your ass.”

  I grinned. “Are Goren and Arasinya alright?”

  “Arasinya's doing great.” A small frown creased his forehead. “Goren will be sick for a few days yet. They've counteracted the effects of the poison, but he's pretty weak. He'll probably be here for another four or five days, according to Jerome.”

  “We're in the hospital?”

  Conal sighed heavily. “Yep, stuck in this place again. They've healed my injuries, but I'm stuck in here for another day or two.” He scowled unhappily. “Apparently Jerome's worried about my mental health after the torture. I told him I was fine.” Conal leaned forward, kissing the top of my head. “Your Dad's doing okay, he's in the room next door. William's been released. Misaki dropped by earlier to see how we were doing.”

  “How are 'we' doing?” I asked. Despite my conviction that the baby was fine, I wasn't so sure in the cold light of day.

  Conal smiled softly, immediately picking up on my concern. “We're doing okay.” He leaned forward, dropped his mouth to mine for another brief kiss. “The baby is fine.”

  The relief was overwhelming. Although I'd had to trust Nememiah would protect my unborn child, a niggling fear had remained that I might have harmed the baby during the rescue. Conal ran his fingers across my cheek. “You risked your life and your baby's for me,” he whispered huskily. “I can't believe you did it.”

  I licked my lips anxiously, keeping my palm against his cheek. “I had to, Conal. They wouldn't agree to try and rescue you. I had to do something.” I gazed into his dark eyes. “I love you. I can't live without you,” I admitted, my voice dropping to a whisper. The strength of my feelings for him stunned me, even as I confessed to how I felt and saw the tenderness in his eyes as he focused on mine.

  Conal dropped his mouth over mine, growling huskily as he kissed me. His arms tightened around my waist, drawing me close against his body. When he released my lips he whispered against my mouth. “I can't live without you either, Sugar. I've tried - and I hated it. All I want is you. All I need is to have you with me, letting me love you.”

  “I thought he was going to kill you.”

  Conal's eyes narrowed and he shook his head. “So did I. A few times there, I wished he would.” He bit his lip pensively. “This is going to sound crazy, but Lucas wouldn't let me give up.”

  I stared for a moment, struggling to comprehend what he was suggesting. “Lucas?” I questioned.

  Conal stroked my cheek. “When things were as bad as they could be, when I thought I didn't have the strength to take any more…” He shivered involuntarily, his eyes bleak. “I heard Lucas in my head. He kept reminding me how much I loved you, how much you loved me. He told me I had to live, had to survive to be with you again.”

  I contemplated this revelation for a minute. “How could he…”

  Conal shrugged. “I have no idea. But he kept me going long enough to be rescued.”

  “How did we get to be sharing a hospital bed?” I wondered aloud, snuggling against his chest.

  “My request,” Conal admitted huskily. “After what happened, I needed you close, wanted to hold you against me.” He grinned. “Rowena had a word with Jerome and here we are. In our own private room, just the two of us.”

  I smiled in amusement. “Privacy is nice.”

  “Holding you is better,” Conal added. He squeezed his eyes shut. “When he was torturing me, the only thing that got me through it was thinking about you. Knowing I had to try and survive to get back to you.”

  I shuddered, the tremor rippling through my whole body. “I saw what he was doing to you,” I whispered against Conal's chest. “In my nightmares,” I bit my lip, finding it horrifying to recall even now, “I saw him burning your skin, I could smell it.”

  Conal's arms tightened around me. “It's over now, Sugar. It's all over now,” he whispered as he kissed my forehead, my cheek. “I'm never leaving your side again.”

  I lifted my eyes, saw the horror etched in his. “I wish you'd never gone.”

  Conal managed a cynical grin. “If I'd known you three women could march in there and get out again – I would have never volunteered in the first place.”

  “We had a lot of help. The spirits handled most of the fighting.”

  Conal was thoughtful for a moment. “Lucas?”

  I nodded. “Your father, Phelan – dozens of them.”

  “Ben told me earlier, said you kept them corporeal for ten hours. He said by the time they arrived, there were dozens of vampires being held back at the doors by some invisible force.”

  “I didn't realize it was that long,” I admitted. “Guess that's why I was so tired.” I yawned sleepily. “Thank God Ben and the others came through the portal. I think we were all going to die if they hadn't.”

  “You ladies seemed to have it all under control,” Conal suggested. “At least from what I could see. Of course, I drifted in and out a bit.”

  “Trust me, we were screwed,” I admitted. “If the guys hadn't come through the portal, we were going to be overrun.” I briefly explained Gwynn's actions in the dungeon.

  “You ca
n't blame her for loathing the guy,” Conal said gently. “What he did to the Tine girls – it was horrendous.”

  “I understand that,” I agreed. “But Gwynn lost the plot just when I needed her most.” I shivered. “And you didn't see what she did to Arawn.”

  “So you're angry with her.” It was a statement, not a question.

  “Yeah. Really angry. And Nick's furious with me, for going in the first place.” I hadn't seen Nick since we'd arrived back, but I imagined he was still planning on giving me a grilling.

  “It will all sort itself out,” Conal predicted confidently. “Nick'll calm down, and you and Gwynn will sort out your differences.”

  Despite Conal's assurances, I didn't think it would work out as easily as he expected. “I don't even know how long I've been asleep.”

  Conal lifted his arm from my back, glancing at his watch. “Hours. Probably twenty or so.” He draped his arm over my back again. “Taking a hit from an orb didn't help.”

  “But it didn't hurt the baby,” I mused aloud. “I was worried,” I admitted.

  “Seems Nememiah kept his word,” Conal said. “I don't want you in that position again, Charlotte. No more crazy risks like that.”

  My mouth lifted into a faint smile. “All right. I'll try to stick to the non-crazy risks from now on.”

  “Jerome did another scan on the baby, says everything is perfect. I think he was surprised – and very relieved,” Conal explained. He met my eyes, his own filled with tenderness. “I checked with him – your baby is due on July eighth.”

  My hand instinctively touched my stomach as I gazed at Conal. “July eighth?”

  Conal nodded. “A week after my birthday.”

  I smiled wryly. “I never knew when your birthday was.”

  Conal returned my smile. “Seems there's a lot we don't know about each other. It's something I intend to remedy.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “I guess that's true.”

  Conal got a devilish look in his eye. “We might not even like one another,” he suggested nonchalantly, “our feelings for one another might be… pure lust.”

  I chuckled. “You think so?”

  Conal shook his head, deep dimples appearing in his cheeks as he smiled. “Lust has a lot to do with it on my part, that's true.” He brushed his mouth against my lips. “But what I feel for you – it's beyond anything I've ever experienced before.”

  “You've had other girlfriends?” I asked cautiously.

  Conal smiled. “A few.” He shrugged a little, his eyes fixed on mine. “I'm no saint, Sugar. I'm thirty-nine years old, I've had a few partners.”

  I nodded. “Was there anyone… serious?”

  Conal pursed his lips. “I lived with one woman for about two years. That's probably as serious as it ever got.” He rubbed his chin thoughtfully, “I've never met anybody I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Until now.”

  I couldn't help the delighted smile that lit up my face, the contented feeling in my chest. “I've never asked – do you have brothers or sisters?”

  Conal shook his head. “Only child. Miscarriage rates are high amongst werewolves. Mom lost two babies after I was born.” He lifted his hand up, ran his fingers through my curls. “You're lucky to have a little brother. Kazuki's a fabulous kid.”

  I bit my lip. “I had other siblings too. Alexis, Georgia and Henry.” Somehow, it wasn't so painful to speak about now, not as difficult as it had been all those months ago when I told Lucas. I found myself wanting to share with Conal.

  “They were murdered by your stepfather?” he questioned quietly.

  I nodded, instinctively clinging to his chest. “He stabbed my Mom, Alexis and Georgia. He smothered Henry.”

  “How long ago was this?” Conal asked. His fingers moved through my hair soothingly.

  “Three years ago, this week.”

  Conal swore roughly. “You've had so much to deal with in such a short time, Charlotte. More than anyone should have to cope with.” He captured me against him, whispering against my ear. “I swear to God, Charlotte. I'll love you and protect you for the rest of your life, if you'll let me. I'll make every day as wonderful as I can make it. I'll love you and cherish you for as long as I live.”

  I inhaled deeply against his chest, his warmth comforting against my cheek. “I know,” I whispered, relishing the feel of him against me.

  Conal rolled onto his back, drawing me with him so I was curled up against his side, my head still against his chest. “I adore you. You know that, don't you?”

  I inclined my head, once, twice. “I only wish you'd told me exactly how you felt earlier,” I admitted. “I wish you hadn't told me you were happy with me being with Lucas, when you really weren't.”

  Conal sighed heavily. “What could I do, Charlotte? Make things harder for you by fighting for you?” He shook his head. “It wasn't an option to me. I didn't want to make your choice any more difficult than I could already see it was. It tortured you to make that decision in the first place. It wouldn't have been fair for me to make it even harder for you.”

  I shut my eyes, thinking through my response before voicing it. “But it tortured you, to see me with Lucas.”

  “I won't lie to you. I hated every minute of it. Knowing he had you, when I wanted you so badly…” His voice trailed off, his jaw clenched tightly. Taking a deep breath, he spoke again. “Sometimes when you love someone, you have to let them go. That's what I was trying to do.” He grimaced. “Failing miserably, admittedly. Mom and Nonny kept on at me constantly, telling me to let you know how I really felt, but I just couldn't do it to you.”

  I blinked. “Your Mom?”

  Conal smiled. “You look surprised.”

  My forehead creased in a little frown. “I wasn't sure whether she liked me.”

  Conal shook his head. “How could she not like you? Granted, you haven't had a lot to do with one another, but if there's anyone Mom knows, it's me. She's known from the very beginning how crazy I was about you. She's been pushing me to make a move for months now. Not to mention Nonny's continual interference in my love life. She's hated every woman I've dated since I met you.”

  I giggled, the thought of tiny Nonny interfering in Conal's love life was deeply amusing and I was still giggling when the door opened and Ben walked in, closely followed by Rowena and Marianne.

  “Ah, our heroine is awake,” Ben announced with a delighted smile.

  I flushed with embarrassment. “Hardly a heroine.”

  “Not what I'm hearing outside,” Marianne announced happily as she leaned over to kiss my cheek. “You, Gabrielle and Gwynn are rapidly escalating to legendary proportions. Not to mention the guys, risking a trip through a portal in reverse.”

  I blushed an even deeper red and Conal chuckled, squeezing me gently.

  “We only did what we needed to do,” I protested.

  “I'm afraid I have to disagree, Charlotte,” Ben murmured as he pressed a kiss to my forehead. “Going into Sfantu Drâghici in extreme circumstances took immense courage.”

  “I agree,” Conal said softly, his fingers intertwining through mine.

  “Well, according to Gwynn they did use the fearless sigils,” Marianne laughed. “I must admit; I'd like to try one. It has quite an effect from what I hear.” She peeked at my slyly from beneath her bright blue fringe. “It's enough to start our Charlotte stripping off in front of the enemy.”

  Conal rolled his eyes. “Anything that would make Charlotte act so… provocatively had to be something crazy.”

  “It worked, didn't it?” I muttered.

  Marianne grinned. “I wish I'd been there!”

  The heat rose over my cheeks again and Conal grinned. “It was a good plan, Charlotte.”

  I rolled my eyes in disgust. “It was the most half-baked plan I've ever come up with. I just didn't know what to do to force Archangelo to let go of William.”

  “From what I heard, it worked. You rescued William.” Rowena smiled warmly. “I
can never thank you enough.”

  “Charlotte, we need to talk about Gwynn,” Ben suggested softly.

  “She let me down, Ben.”

  “Surely you had doubts before you agreed to take her?” Rowena said. “She reacted the worst of all of us to what happened while we were being held.” Rowena brushed her hands across her arms, as though a chill had run down her spine. “You can hardly blame her for taking revenge when she saw opportunity.”

  I inhaled heavily. “Taking revenge isn't my issue with Gwynn, although seeing her tear Arawn's heart out through his ribcage is going to take a while to wipe from my memory.” I shivered. “Having Gwynn become completely unresponsive and irresponsible while we were in a dangerous situation is my problem.”

  Ben was watching me closely. “Charlotte, are you sure?” He sighed heavily and sat in a chair beside the bed. “I think sometimes you have become so complacent with being around us, you have forgotten what we truly are.”

  Rowena clasped my hand in hers. “Charlotte, when all is said and done, we are vampire. We appear civilized, we act like humans. But we are not.”

  Marianne smiled sheepishly. “We're violent, Charlotte. In the throes of bloodlust, of anger – we're incredibly violent. Gwynn reacted as a true vampire will react when enraged.” She grimaced. “Granted, her timing was lousy, but she wanted revenge on the vampire who was responsible for causing her so much pain.”

  “The only reason we can live here, amongst humans, is because we are so careful to ensure we are never hungry when we're around them. Charlotte, you know this. Lucas warned you often enough about the dangers associated with being near us. Gwynn did what a vampire does when filled with bloodlust and rage,” Ben added.

  I sighed heavily. “Yeah, I know. And you're right. I do sometimes forget what you really are. I am angry about Gwynn letting me down,” I grimaced a little. “But I'm also freaked out about what she did to Arawn.”

  Conal had remained silent until now, but he rubbed his fingers across my back soothingly. “Are we expecting any repercussions from Gwynn's actions?”