Nuttier Than Pecan Pie

by Rachael Stapleton

  “Well, he seems to be more interested in a friendship with you than Ren.”

  Eve considered that. “He did seem a little flirtatious. Some men are like that.”

  “And some women,” Juniper paused, and they both noticed Bianca Hyena staring at Wallace like he was a chocolate chip waffle with all the fixings. He turned around to glance in their direction like he’d been caught being naughty and waved.

  “Isn’t that cute?” Juniper waved back. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say he’s planning to make a move on you.”

  “Oh, please. Bianca can have him,” Eve said with a laugh.

  “Well, still, I’d tell Ren to watch his back.”

  Eve scoffed at the remark. “They’re friends. Nothing like that could ever happen.”

  “Things like that happen all the time,” Juniper said dramatically. “Oh, here comes Clara.”

  Eve looked up. The elderly woman was walking across the crowded lot, looking totally disoriented. She didn’t seem to know where she was. Then she saw Eve, and recognition dawned. She hurried over to them.

  “Oh, Eve, I’m so glad you’re here,” Clara said, her voice trembling. “I still can’t seem to find Gwen. She never returned home, and I’m incredibly worried about her. Where could she be?”

  “We’ve alerted the police,” Eve said. “I’m sure she’ll turn up soon. I really wouldn’t worry too much. I’m sure there’s a logical explanation and she’s fine.” Deep inside, she hoped she was right.

  “Mallory told me you’re taking Gwen’s place.”

  Eve nodded. “I hope it’s okay with you.”

  “Oh, it’s fine, dear, fine. I just wish Gwen was here. She does love this event so much.”

  L’il Mickey arrived and pointed toward the judges’ tent. “Hey there, Clara, why don’t we take you over to the judges’ table and get you set up with something to drink? We’ll find you a comfortable chair, and you can sit and wait there until the judging begins.”

  “Oh, that would be wonderful. Such a sweet young man, you are.”

  Taking Clara by the arm, Mickey escorted the elderly woman across the lawn to the tent. Eve was planning to follow, but instead she was pulled into a series of conversations with people who wanted to meet the new judge. Before Eve knew it, an hour had passed, and when she looked around, covered slices of pie, in groups of three, were being set out on a long table adorned with neatly pressed white tablecloths.

  In front of each group of slices was a numbered placard but no other identifying information; this would, presumably, ensure the judges’ objectivity. Only Mallory and L’il Mickey knew who had created each of the sample pies. There was a slice of each pie for each of the three judges.

  Eve could see from where she stood that Clara had taken one of her slices of pie, removed the plastic wrapping covering it, located a spoon, and was already dipping into it.

  The elderly woman seemed not to care that they weren’t supposed to start yet as she shoved the last forkful into her mouth.

  Mallory appeared and walked down several steps to the lawn and crossed to a microphone set up on a podium. She flicked on the mic, tapped it a few times to make sure it was hot, and then said, “Welcome, everyone, to the Annual Bohemian Lake Pie Bake-off!”

  The crowd gathered around and responded with a warm round of applause. Mallory put on her reading glasses, looked down at a sheaf of papers in front of her, and launched into her opening remarks.

  “We have the good fortune of a beautiful day, and we have eleven very talented contestants who have made some wonderful pies for us to sample.”

  As Eve was listening to Mallory speak, she spotted Wallace Nutkins, who stood with Ellie. He must have sensed her looking at him, for he glanced her way and gave her a warm smile before turning his attention back to Mallory.

  “As you might have heard,” Mallory told the crowd, “we’ve had to make some last‑minute changes to our lineup of judges this morning. Today we have a highly qualified individual who just so happens to sponsor the contest. He’s the owner of the Sticky Family Sugarbush and Nutkins’ Peanuts products. Ladies and gentlemen, would you please give a warm welcome to today’s guest judge, Mr. Wallace Nutkins!”

  Wallace raised his hand slightly and turned this way and that as the crowd applauded politely. Mallory pulled him toward the podium, and after a few moments, Wallace acquiesced and leaned toward the mic.

  “Thank you. My taste buds are already salivating.”

  As the audience applauded again, Mallory referred to her notes before she continued. “Our next judge,” he said, “has stepped in at the last minute. I’m sure you’ve all heard her jangling her keys or read her wonderful columns in the Private Ink newspaper. Ladies and gentlemen, would you please welcome our community correspondent and all-around Girl Friday, Ms. Eve Banter.”

  This was her moment. Eve stepped forward, flashed a smile at the crowd, and waved like she’d just been crowned Queen of Bohemian Lake.

  Juniper, who was standing nearby, tugged her back. “Well at least no one can accuse you of being shy.”

  “What? I’m just giving my people what they want,” Eve whispered as she smiled again into the crowd.

  “And of course, our final judge,” Mallory said, “needs no introduction. She has been a mainstay of this event almost since its inception. Please welcome back Mrs. Clara Hart!”

  Eve and Juniper hurried over and helped Clara stand as the crowd applauded. The elderly woman did her best to smile. But she seemed preoccupied and quickly sank back down into her seat.

  “Are you okay, Clara?” Eve asked, leaning close to her.

  Clara smiled bravely. “Oh—.” She stopped abruptly as her face changed in an instant, first to an expression of shock and then to one of horror. “Oh my!” she squeaked and tumbled out of her chair in a dead faint, falling heavily onto the snow-covered ground.

  TEN

  “C

  lara!”

  As Eve dropped to one knee beside the unconscious Clara, several others swarmed around to help, and a small pocket of chaos enveloped them. Juniper jumped up, calling out loudly for a nurse or doctor.

  Eve checked Clara’s pulse, which was faint but steady, and tapped the elderly woman gently on the cheeks. “Clara! Clara! Can you hear me?”

  Clara let out several quick breaths as her eyelids fluttered.

  Ellie arrived and knelt on the other side of Clara.

  “She just fainted dead away,” Eve said. “Find Rebel. She’s a nurse.”

  “She’s coming around,” Ellie said. “Could everyone just back away, please? Give us some air.”

  Eve felt a wave of relief going through her as she turned back toward the elderly woman. “Clara, what happened?” she asked breathlessly.

  The elderly woman looked up at her with blinking, unfocused eyes. “Oh... oh... Eve, dear.” She put a hand to her forehead, looking dazed. “Where am I?”

  “I think she just needs a few minutes to recover,” Ellie said reassuringly. “I’ll go see if I can find Rebel, though. I left her manning the kid’s area.” She rose and dashed off.

  Clara’s gaze shifted through the faces around her, then settled back on Eve’s. “Why is everyone looking at me so strangely?”

  “You fainted,” Eve told her. “You gave us quite a scare.”

  “Oh, I’m.” Clara’s mouth worked a little, and the tip of her tongue flicked out, tasting her lips. Suddenly her gaze sharpened. “I’m feeling so tired!” she said in a harsh whisper.

  Eve leaned closer.

  “I was hoping the pie would give me a boost of energy, but I only feel worse.” Clara’s gray eyes stared deep into hers. Reaching up with an unsteady hand, she took Eve by the shoulder and pulled her closer. “I guess all the sugar just threw me out of whack. Mind you, it didn’t taste all that sweet. It was really quite perfectly balanced—it sort of reminded me of Cocoa’s.”

  Eve’s head popped up again. She twisted back toward the table, searching for t
he pie Clara had eaten from. But someone had already whisked it away. “Where’d it go?” she asked no one in particular.

  She never got an answer. Mallory was back at the microphone. “There’s nothing to worry about, folks. We’ve just had a small interruption. Mrs. Hart fainted, but it appears she’s going to be okay. Just give us a couple of minutes to attend to her and we’ll begin again. The judging will commence shortly.”

  Mallory quickly took control of the situation. “Let’s get her to the sleigh,” she said. “She can rest in there, out of this crowd, and I’ll have someone call Doc’s place.”

  With Mallory’s help, Eve and Juniper were able to get Clara on her feet. They escorted the dazed woman into the Sugar sleigh.

  “I’m so embarrassed,” Clara said weakly, holding on to Eve’s hand. “I didn’t mean to cause such a scene.” She glanced up at Rebel who’d just arrived, then said softly into Eve’s ear, “Has anyone heard from Gwen yet? I do hope she’s all right. I just don’t know what I’d do without her.”

  Eve patted her hand. “We’re going to find out where she is. Don’t you worry about that. You just need to rest for a while. I’ll be right back.” She rose and stepped down from the sleigh.

  “I’ll go with her.” Rebel said, climbing up onto the sleigh’s side rail. She studied Eve. “Is everything all right?”

  “I don’t know yet.”

  Steps away, Mallory had quickly put the day’s events back on track. The old plates of pie for the judges had been cleared away, and Ellie, L’il Mickey, and a few other staff members were bringing in newer, fresher slices, which they were again placing in front of placards with large black numerals. Wallace Nutkins was leaning over the table, checking out the samples with a studious eye.

  Standing nearby, Ellie saw Eve and motioned. “We’re ready for the judges,” she said, crossing quickly to her. In a lower voice, she asked, “How’s Clara? Is she going to be able to participate?”

  Eve shook her head. “I don’t think so. She’s a little shaken up.”

  “Is she going to be all right?”

  “She’ll be okay. Rebel is with her.”

  Ellie thought for a moment. “Well, we’ll have to move on without her. Hopefully you and Wallace will be able to agree on a winner. If you wouldn’t mind, would you please take the chair next to his? He’s taking his seat now.”

  “Okay, sure.”

  Ellie headed off in a different direction, and as she moved toward the table, L’il Mickey walked past. She grabbed his arm. “What happened to the plates of pie that were just here?”

  L’il Mickey looked at her, uncertain at first. Then he seemed to understand what she was asking. “Oh, you mean the old slices? They got jostled around when Clara fainted, and we weren’t sure who they belonged to, so Mal had us clear them off and get new pieces from all the contestants.”

  “Where’d you take the old pieces?”

  L’il Mickey shrugged. “We dumped them in the trash.”

  Eve groaned. “Which trash?”

  He shook his head. “I’m not sure. One of the volunteers did it. Why?”

  She sighed in resignation. “Never mind.”

  L’il Mickey looked uncomfortable. “I gotta go.”

  As he hurried off, Eve crossed to the judges’ table. She would have like to have found that pie plate but there was no time. She pulled out a chair and sat down next to Wallace.

  ELEVEN

  T hirty minutes later, Mallory leaned in close to Eve who was chugging a bottle of water. “I think Wallace is ready. How about you?”

  “After ten pie samplings, the only thing I’m ready for is a treadmill and a nap.” Eve wiped her mouth with a napkin and smiled. “I mean, alright—let’s do this.”

  “Oh wait, you only tasted ten? I think you’re short one.” Mallory commented, and pointed to the last piece.

  Eve nodded. “Oops, I didn’t realize there were two pecan entries.” She took a bite and immediately fell in love. This one was definitely better than the raisin pecan. Despite the sweetness of the maple syrup, it was well balanced thanks to the bacon and was that peanut butter? She broke her rule and took another bite, mumbling to Mallory and Wallace, who’d just walked up. “Did you try this? Oh, my goodness. That nutty topping is to die for.” She’d no sooner said the words then they hit her. Oh God! Was this Cocoa’s pie?

  Wallace smiled. “I did try it. It was good, but I preferred the raisin one.”

  “Really?” Eve swallowed and took another sip of water, turning to Mallory. “Do you by chance know whose pie this is?”

  Mallory tilted her head, “Eve, you’re not seriously trying to cheat, are you?”

  “No, no. Of course not. I don’t mean it like that. I just really like this pie and I’m wondering for later who made it.”

  Mallory shook her head. “Well, we can figure that out later. Now, you two… pick a winner already and let me know.

  Eve turned sheepishly to Wallace. “So, how do we come to an agreement on winners then?”

  “We go with the three we have in common.”

  They compared their lists. Eve had liked the bacon pecan, maple crunch cream, maple-walnut cheesepie and strawberry-rhubarb with the maple glaze while Wallace had liked the butterscotch, maple crunch cream, maple-walnut cheesepie and raisin pecan. Which meant neither pecan pie would make the cut since they couldn’t come to an agreement on which one was better. That just didn’t seem right to Eve but who was she to judge.

  They came to an agreement, handing their final list over to Mallory. She studied it as she walked over to one side of the tent, where she checked a sheet on the clipboard held by L’il Mickey to confirm the identity of each contestant. Then walked to the podium, waving the sheet of paper high in the air, flashing it for the crowd. “We have our winners!” she announced as she walked.

  The crowd applauded enthusiastically as Mallory reached the podium and switched on the microphone. “May I have your attention, please?” She waited a few moments for the crowd to quiet, then said again, “May I have your attention. First,” Mallory said, her amplified voice carrying out over the lawn, “I would like to thank all the contestants who participated in today’s event and congratulate them on their wonderful pies. It’s inspiring to know we have so many excellent bakers in our little community. I’m sure the judges had a very difficult time making their selections.”

  “She’s got that right,” Eve said softly.

  “I’d also like to thank all of our guests and visitors for coming out today and enjoying this lovely winter wonderland,” Mallory continued. “Of course, we couldn’t have pulled all this together without the Bohemian Festival Committee, and our top‑notch volunteers. Finally, I’d like to remind all of you that Dani’s band will start playing shortly. We have more activities planned for the children a little later this afternoon. And I invite all of you to stick around and sample the excellent pies available today. As far as I’m concerned, all of our contestants are award winners. However, there can be only one champion. And now, if the judges would please join me here at the podium, I’ll read the names of the third‑, second‑, and first place winners.”

  “I guess that’s my cue,” Eve said, and to a smattering of applause she walked to the podium with Wallace. Mallory shook both their hands, and then she and Wallace stood together on the right.

  “Here we go,” Mallory said dramatically. She checked her sheet then continued, “And our third runner‑up is... Louise Olivet from the Cheese shop!”

  Upon hearing her name, Louise beamed, waved her hand high in the air so everyone would know where she was, and worked her way through the crowd to the podium. She shook hands with Mallory, and the two judges, and Mallory proudly awarded her a small trophy in the shape of a golden pie, along with a white ribbon, as Ren snapped a few photos of her.

  Eve applauded warmly along with the crowd, pleased her friend had made the final cut. That meant Louise’s pie had been the cheese. She should have guessed.
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br />   “Next,” Mallory said, “our second‑place winner is” – again she paused as she checked the name – “Hatti Dustfeather!”

  The little old historian gave a quick whoop of joy and applauded herself as she trotted to the podium and shook hands with everyone, then collected her trophy and red ribbon. She stood next to Louise at one side of the podium, barely able to contain herself. Eve again applauded with the others. That had been one of Wallace’s favorites, a butterscotch maple walnut pie Eve had found a little heavy on the cinnamon.

  “Finally,” Mallory said, waving the paper in her hand, “we’ve come to the moment you’ve been waiting for all morning. Here we go. The winner of the Annual Bohemian Lake Pie Bake-off is” – another dramatic pause as the crowd waited in hushed anticipation – “Lulu McCloskey of Cookies and Corsets!”

  A few in the crowd gasped as others burst into applause. Eve heard Pike and Finn join in, adding a few whistles and cheers of congratulations to the warm ovation, which grew louder as Lulu emerged from a group of friends and made her way to the podium. She smiled sweetly, eyes watering—whether from gratitude or the cold weather—as she shook hands with Mallory, Wallace, and then Eve.

  “Nice job, Lulu!” Eve congratulated her as they shook hands. “You made a wonderful pie.”

  “Oh, thank you. Thank you!” She seemed on the verge of speechlessness.

  It had been a very yummy maple crunch cream pie—Eve’s second choice and Wallace’s first.

  As Lulu received a trophy and blue ribbon, she couldn’t help but wonder who had made her personal favorite pie – the one at the top of her list, the one with the bacon and maple syrup?

  Her gaze shifted back and forth across the tent. The easiest way to find out, she thought, would be to get a quick look at the entry forms.

  She looked around and spotted L’il Mickey talking to his grandfather, Mick Spirit—another historian from the museum. They seemed to be multiplying around here.

  Wallace leaned in close to Eve, so their shoulders touched. “See, that was fun, right?” he asked, breaking into her thoughts.