Nuttier Than Pecan Pie

by Rachael Stapleton

  “I remember.” He still held out his hand.

  Hesitantly, she extended her arm and gave him the doll.

  “I can’t believe she actually did it.” Suddenly, he seemed very weary. He set down the doll and crossed over to the stairs. He flopped down heavily onto them and rubbed at his forehead with thick fingers. “No wonder you think we’re mixed up in this.”

  “You were helping Bianca, weren’t you? That’s why you stole the doll for her?”

  Mick shook his head, his eyes hard again. “It’s my boy that got us into this,” Mick said, a pained expression on his face. “And those damned fake I. D’s of his.”

  “Fake I. D’s?” Eve couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Is that what this is all about?”

  “Yeah. That’s part of it, at least. But there’s a lot more.”

  “So why don’t you tell me all about it?”

  He waved a hand at her. “Bianca came to us,” he said finally, reluctantly. “It was all her idea, and that’s the truth.” The pained look in his eyes returned. “L’il Mickey... well, he ran into some trouble. It seems he got cocky – and reckless. He started selling those fake ID’s of his to other high school kids. Anyway, the boy got in over his head. One of the other kid’s parents found out and threatened to charge him. Bianca just happened to know the parents and intervened.”

  “When was this?” Eve asked, her voice quieter now, encouraging him.

  Mick hesitated before he answered. “About a month ago, maybe a little more.” Mick ran a hand through his sandy hair. “I was disappointed. But he’s my grandson, you know?” He paused, averting his eyes for a few moments. He took a deep breath before he continued.

  “A few weeks later she came to me. She said she needed to call in that favor I owed her.”

  “Let me guess. She wanted you to steal the doll for her.”

  “I guess so. She never told me what.”

  Both of them were silent for a few moments as they considered Mick’s predicament. Finally, Eve said, “What happened?”

  It took Mick a long time to answer. “I was ready to do it. I really was. She told me exactly when she wanted me to sneak into the house. I think she might have been staking out the place. She seemed to know when Clara came and went. Get in and get out.”

  “But someone noticed,” Eve said as an image of Gwen wrapped in the area rug sprang into her mind. She shivered as a chill overtook her, but she shook it off.

  “Yeah, I guess so,” Mick said. “But they didn’t notice me, ’cause I’m not the one who broke in. In the end, I just couldn’t do it.” He paused. “I thought about it a long time, but I knew deep down I didn’t have it in me. I’m just an old man. So, I pulled out at the last minute.”

  “Bianca must have been pretty mad about that.”

  Mick gave her a strained look. “You have no idea. I’ve never seen her that mad before. She threatened to turn my son in. She said she’d have me fired, though she was just bluffing about that. We both knew that would never happen. I told her I still owed her one, but I wasn’t doing anything that wasn’t legal.”

  “So, if you didn’t break into Clara’s house, who did?”

  Mick shrugged. “I guess she did it herself.”

  The pieces were finally starting to fit together.

  “Do you think she killed Gwen?”

  Mick shook his head. “I don’t know nothing about that neither.”

  “So, what happened after she stole the recipe?” Eve asked.

  “For the last few days she barely spoke to me. She seemed preoccupied.”

  “Did you talk to her or see her at all yesterday? The police think she was killed sometime last night.”

  At that question, Mick scrunched up his face. “The police were out here earlier today, asking me the same thing. She was here in the afternoon, but she left in a rush. I had the feeling she was meeting someone.”

  “Did you tell the police that?”

  Mick nodded. “Sure did. I also told them that she’d been pretty upset ever since the Bake-off. She wanted to win that thing pretty bad. But I got the feeling there was something else going on. She became very secretive. I thought she was up to something.”

  “What?”

  “I don’t know for sure.” Mick pointed at the doll. “But I think it had something to do with that.”

  “The doll?”

  Eve eyed the doll. On an impulse, she crossed to it and picked it up. She looked inside the secret pocket. “Maybe there’s something else in here we’ve been missing. Maybe...”

  But Eve never had a chance to finish.

  A figure had appeared suddenly out of the snow and now stood silhouetted in the doorway.

  “I’ll take that,” the figure said, motioning toward Eve and the doll as he stepped inside.

  Her head twisted toward the voice. He lifted the balaclava. It was Ren’s friend, Sticky Wallace Nutkins.

  And he was holding a gun, leveled right at her heart.

  THIRTY

  “O

  h goodie. I see you’ve found it. I’d wondered where that silly woman had hidden it.”

  His voice was surprisingly calm as he took a few steps into the office. The snow seemed to cling to him, as if reluctant to let him escape its grasp. He wore a black jacket, black shirt, and dark slacks. He also wore black gloves, Eve noticed. A criminal’s outfit—although perhaps not suited to a snowstorm.

  “Why don’t you set that doll right back down on the desk,” Wallace instructed her, “and step away from it.” He swung the gun toward Mick. “Both of you. Back over that way.” He motioned toward the center of the lobby.

  When they both hesitated, stunned by his sudden appearance, his face abruptly turned dark and his eyes lashed out at them, full of ferocity. “Now!” he shouted, jabbing at them with the gun. They both jumped. Mick sprang to his feet like a toddler being asked what was in his mouth, and Eve quickly shuffled sideways, dropped the doll on the desk as Wallace had instructed, and moved away.

  Side by side, she and Mick moved. Both of them held their hands up in the air, even though Wallace hadn’t asked them to. It seemed appropriate, and was more instinct than anything, especially when facing down the barrel of the grey metal pistol he held.

  Wallace’s face had returned to its previous calm state, his sudden burst of anger gone as quickly as it had appeared. His eyes, though, were bright and glassy, with thin pinpricks of light shining out, as if lit from within. When he was satisfied they were in place, he strode purposefully across the lobby, keeping the gun loosely pointed in their direction. He stopped in front of the reception desk, let out a visible sound of relief, and slowly reached out toward the doll, as if it were some great talisman he had found only after a long, arduous quest.

  “So here it is at last,” he said, taking it in a gloved hand. He studied the notebook, then used his thumb to flip it open and read the email. Satisfied, he closed it again and turned toward Eve and Mick.

  “I’m sorry to put you through all this,” he said, sounding genuinely concerned. “It wasn’t supposed to be this difficult. It was a simple arrangement. I paid Bianca –”

  “You were her very demanding client?” Eve cut in.

  Wallace looked slightly annoyed at the interruption. His mouth twitched at the edges. “As I said, we had an arrangement. She would acquire the doll with the incriminating evidence, she would be paid and take that recipe she wanted, and then I would get everything else.”

  “You killed her, didn’t you?”

  In response, Wallace reached into his jacket pocket. He pulled something out, glanced at it, and tossed it toward Mick’s feet.

  “Pick it up!”

  Mick flinched and fumbled for it. “It’s an ice chisel.”

  Wallace smiled. “And now it has your fingerprints on it. I borrowed it from Sharlene’s son when he wasn’t looking,” Wallace said to Eve, allowing a trace of mockery to enter his voice. “Ren’s introduced me to a lot of nice, trusting peop
le, you know – he’s not as observant as you’d expect for a man who owns a private investigation company and a newspaper. Neither are you for that matter. You never even questioned why I was at the museum that day.”

  Eve frowned. “Why were you at the museum that day?’

  “To do the same thing you were doing. Only you beat me to it. Turns out it was a good thing Bianca hadn’t hidden things in her office. Too bad she didn’t know enough to hide from me later on.”

  Eve gasped, suddenly angry. “Why, you're lower than a snake's belly in a wagon rut. I can’t believe Ren vouched for you.”

  Wallace flashed his white teeth as his grin grew. “What are friends for?

  “Of course, he’s had other things on his mind this weekend – like murder... and, of course, you. He likes you a lot, you know. He talks about you all the time – even when everyone else around him gets tired of hearing about you. But at least it was a way for me to keep tabs on the situation. Lawrence has been a perfect gentleman at spilling all the secrets about your investigation,” Wallace added with a slight grin.

  Eve couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “You betrayed him? He thought –”

  “What, that we were friends? We never were. He bought Teddy Barker’s newspaper business and I needed access to Teddy’s files. I’ve nurtured our friendship over the years, in case those files ever turned up. Of course, I didn’t know at the time that Ren didn’t even have them. It wasn’t until Bianca called to blackmail me that I knew where they’d gone.”

  “So, that’s why you killed her?” Eve asked. “Because she was blackmailing you?”

  Wallace’s face turned dark again. “Actually, we came to an agreement, but she went back on our deal.”

  “Because she realized you betrayed her too?”

  Wallace glared at her. “You’re smarter than you look. How did you figure that out?”

  “You promised her she’d win that contest.”

  At that, Wallace chuckled. “Well, yes, it’s true. I did promise her that, but she wasn’t supposed to use that recipe. Stupid woman!” Wallace let out a grunt. “She wanted the prestige of winning. She demanded I personally judge the contest and get her featured in a magazine. And, of course, she wanted money.”

  “When you realized that she’d used the award-winning recipe. You drugged Clara, didn’t you? Because you didn’t want her recognizing the pie.”

  “No, once again you’re on the wrong track. I drugged her, alright,” Wallace said. “Because I was trying to get in to her house to remove the widow’s body. That stupid nosy neighbor fell down the stairs, surprised by Bianca’s presence. Bianca panicked and hid her in the closet. I tell you, that woman made a terrible criminal.”

  Eve thought back to their meeting at the town hall. She made of been a bad criminal but she sure was a good liar.

  “So, Gwen’s death was an accident? Bianca didn’t kill her on purpose?”

  Wallace nodded. “No, she fell apart. Apparently, they were friends or something. I knew the body would start to smell so I’d been trying to get in there for days, but someone was always around. I had to defuse the situation – so I improvised, thinking the old woman would go to the hospital at least for a few hours.” Wallace shrugged. “What can I say? Not everything goes to plan.”

  Wallace gave her a sly smile.

  Eve pressed on. “So why kill Bianca?”

  “Simple,” Wallace said, his smile disappearing. “She threatened to destroy the doll, so I’d never get it. She used it as leverage.”

  “So, you killed her,” Mick cut in, his face twisting in anger.

  “I’d just left the sculpting exhibit. Ren had been kind enough to take me. And I’d stuck the ice chisel in my pocket, just in case I had to use it. Turns out it was a little messier than I thought. Good thing I was wearing gloves.”

  “And for what? That damned doll?” Mick asked incredulously. He inched forward. It was clear he was having thoughts of rushing Wallace, maybe trying to overpower him. But Wallace waved the gun at him.

  “Stay right where you are. And yes, because of the doll. Bianca Hyena was the one who started all this. She was supposed to have the doll with her,” Wallace confirmed, “but of course she didn’t. She said she’d hidden it away where I’d never find it. She said she wanted double the amount we agreed on. Apparently, she’d read through Teddy Barker’s research and knew why I wanted everything.”

  “You mean the fact that you sent out a batch of poisoned peanut butter,” Eve growled.

  “Yes,” Wallace said, his gaze narrowing on her, “Barker got his hands on that traitorous email sent from one of our plants that was very important to my family. I met with Bianca a few weeks ago, and we put our plan together. I agreed to fund the operation.”

  “You’ll never get away with it.”

  “Oh, but I will. You see, I’ve been setting it all up while I was here visiting.” He pointed toward the ice chisel. “The evidence is right there. It will be found in your office, Mick. You had every reason to kill your boss – and Gwen Barker. You had a motive to do what Bianca wanted, and then you put her out of her misery. Or, at least, that’s what the police will think. You did it because Bianca was threatening to out your son for his illegal activities. Right, Mick? They might even think you conspired with Sharlene, hence her son’s weapon.”

  The professor could barely contain his anger. “You know I didn’t.”

  Wallace turned back to look at him. “It doesn’t really matter anymore, does it? What’s done is done. Now it’s just a matter of cleaning up some loose ends.”

  “Like us?” Mick asked.

  “Like you,” Wallace confirmed.

  THIRTY-ONE

  W hat happened next was so surreal Eve found herself barely believing it. After a quick look around, Eve took off out the doors of the building. The psycho’s plan couldn’t work if one of them lived to tell. Eve just hoped Mick would have the good sense to call the cops while she led Wallace on a wild goosechase.

  She raced up the path, the one that wound up the hill. It would eventually lead her to a cliff overlooking Bohemian Lake.

  “Eve!” Wallace screamed into the trees, she could hear him behind her.

  She kept going, doing her best not to slip on the icy patches. The last thing she needed was to render herself unconscious. She’d need her wits about her once they reached the top.

  The snow continued to fall all around her, which impacted visibility. The good news was she was still wearing Clara’s white mink coat, so she’d blend in with her surroundings, the bad news was she was also wearing bright red plaid pants.

  When at last she made it to the top of the cliff, she could see all the way to the frozen lake far below. Only the crisscross matrix of the iron fence separated her from certain death. From somewhere out there, a ski doo blasted along a trail.

  She turned and watched Wallace emerge from the trees. He pulled up the collar of his coat against the wind and turned to face her. “So, here we are,” he said, his voice rising to be heard above the rush of the wind. “You’re a mischievous little minx, aren’t you? Unfortunately, we’ve reached the end of our little climb. Now there’s only one way down for you.”

  “Wallace, you might want to rethink your plan. You just left Mick alone to chase me. Do you really think he didn’t call for help? You don’t want to add another murder charge to the list, do you?” Eve asked, nearly frantic.

  “Now, Eve, I admire your tenacity. Hell, in another scenario, I would have stolen you away from Ren. That man’s no match for your will. But c’mon, do you really think I just left Mick unharmed down there?”

  Eve grimaced. “Oh god, you shot him.”

  All Eve could think was that she needed to survive so she could get Mick help before he bled out if he wasn’t already dead. “Now, don’t look at me like that. I only knocked him out before I ran. He’s alive.”

  Eve felt relief course through her.

  “Of course, that’s only temporar
y… for both of you.”

  “Well, just so you know, no one will believe I jumped off the cliff,” Eve shouted, trying to buy time—for what, she didn’t know.

  Wallace flashed an eerie smile, showing off those white teeth, framed by the black beard. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it. It will all make sense when I get through. Mick killed the widow Barker and Bianca. And you found out he did it. He brought you up here, and you two struggled. Unfortunately, you went over the side and then he killed himself. See, I said it was simple. And very clean. All the loose ends are tied up in a neat package. Face it, sweetheart, I’ve got your number.”

  “Somehow, I doubt that, sweetheart.” Eve growled.

  “You are trouble, Eve, and I dig that.” To prove it, he stepped forward and clamped his left hand around her waist, and yanked her face forward, planting a deep, ferocious kiss on her astonished, gaping mouth.

  She was tempted to kick him in the crotch and claw his face to ribbons had it not been for the gun pressed against the back of her head. At least the barrel was no longer aimed properly. Not that it would take him long to right that. Still, she couldn’t just let him away with this sort of deviant behavior. Without another moment’s hesitation she decided to bite back.

  “Owwwww!” Wallace wailed, shoving her away with one hand and nursing his bleeding lower lip with the other. “You bit me!”

  “Yes, that’s what happens young man, when you stick your mouth somewhere it’s not wanted.”

  He re-aimed the gun. “Well I guess, sadly, that means it’s time for me to deal with you. I’m afraid you only made it easier on me by running up here all on your own,” Wallace said. As he took a menacing step toward her, a musical note sounded from his jacket pocket.

  It was his cell phone, Eve realized. Wallace looked down, distracted, and slipped on a patch of ice. And in that moment Eve took off running. Well, skating was more like it, since the path down the hill was so slippery and treacherous in places, but whatever you call it, she was moving as fast her little legs would take her. She needed to put some distance between herself and the bearded bandit before he gathered himself off the ground.