Big Stick

by R. C. Stephens

  He says it so vehemently, I want to believe him.

  “Did you love him?” He doesn’t look me straight in the eye, as if he’s worried my answer will somehow hurt him.

  I shake my head. “At the time, I thought I did. Matt and I were comfortable. We made sense on paper. Now I know it wasn’t love.” I realize that now. “Him cheating was probably a good thing.” It feels good to admit that out loud.

  Myles nods.

  “How about you?” I ask him. “Anyone special?”

  “I had one serious relationship. She was a psychology major at the University of Chicago,” he says, placing his fork down on his plate. I remember asking my brother about that girl a couple of years back. He told me it was nothing, but it irked me that she looked a lot like me. It made me wonder if Myles had a type.

  “How long were you together?” I can’t help myself. The rational part of my brain knows he had a life all these years without me, but it doesn’t mean I need to punish myself by asking questions I don’t really want the answers to.

  “A year.” He sounds apologetic. “I guess I needed a break from all the crazy, and Tammy gave me that,” he says.

  “What happened?” I ask. I’ve stopped eating, too.

  “She broke up with me,” he admits, and I can’t read his emotions right now. If I could, I would think he looks upset about it.

  “Oh.”

  His gaze cuts to mine. “She was studying psychology. I opened up to her about the accident.”

  It feels like a blade has sliced through my chest because a part of me feels that we should have worked through the accident together.

  “She was in love with me, but she felt I was holding back.” He pauses and swallows hard. “I wasn’t all in. When she left me, she told me she hoped I’d get you back.”

  “You told her about me?” My eyes open wide. I never spoke to Matt or anyone about Myles.

  “You came up. I didn’t exactly come out and say I had feelings for you. When she called me on it, I told her that you were more than my best friend.” He pauses and watches me.

  A thousand possibilities of what could have been rush through my mind. He extends his hand for mine. I give it to him. We stand.

  He pulls me in and hugs me fiercely. “So good to have you in my arms again.” He draws his head back a little, and his lips ghost over mine.

  My hands come up to cup his head, and the kiss deepens, my tongue swiping along his lower lip. Unbridled passion furls through me. Myles’s hands rake up and down my body before landing on my behind. He gives me a possessive squeeze there, pulling me closer, so our bodies are flush. His hard length pressing into my belly causes sparks to shoot through me and the apex of my thighs to clench. The kiss breaks with a pop as he moves down my neck, swiping his tongue along my heated skin. I tilt my head into his neck, licking a path up to the back of his ear. He lets out a guttural groan from the back of his throat, making me so wet for him.

  “I want to do so many things to you right now, but we need to wait.” He says it like he’s fighting an inner battle between what he wants and what he knows to be right. I can’t argue with him—there are so many parts of me that are broken. My mind needs to catch up with my emotions. He stops kissing me and hugs me again. “Maybe we should try to watch some TV or just relax,” he suggests.

  I cock a brow and give him a look that says, really?

  “Don’t give me that look. I said I’m in this for the long run. I don’t want to do something before you’re ready,” he says, pulling me by the hand over to his brown leather couch.

  “Okay, but let me get the dishes.” I turn back.

  “Leave the dishes.”

  He takes a seat on the couch, and I snuggle in next to him.

  “Christmas is in a few weeks,” he says, picking up the remote. “We haven’t been together for so long. I want this year to be special. Your brother told me you guys didn’t do a whole lot back in New York.”

  “True.” Celebrating Christmas became too painful, so we would act like it was like any other night.

  “I have some time off this weekend. I want us to go shopping together. I want to make a big deal of it this year. A big celebration for Christmas Eve. We’ll have a turkey…the works,” he says, and his eyes sparkle like I’ve never seen before.

  “That sounds perfect. Is it okay if I have Sloane over, too? She doesn’t have anyone here.”

  “Sloane is in,” Myles agrees. I reach up and caress the scruff on his jaw. My gaze remains trained on his lips as my chest warms, but I don’t look him in the eye, fearful my gaze will reveal my deep feelings for him.

  As if he can read my thoughts, he kisses my forehead, and I go back to leaning on his chest. Only, we don’t watch TV for long because his hand slides under my shirt, and his fingers tickle the small area under my rib cage.

  “Oh hell.” I turn around and lift myself up, smashing my lips to his.

  Through the kiss, he mutters, “I may not sleep with you, but we sure as hell can make out like a couple of teenagers.”

  With my lips still pressed to his, I answer, “Well, we did miss out on the hot and heavy make-out sessions, so we might as well catch up.” Just as I say the last word, his left palm connects with my breast. At first, he just holds it there.

  “Can I touch your boobs?” he asks with a mischievous gleam in his eyes.

  I swat his arm and reach down to cup his very hard length through his lounge pants. “Only if I can do this,” I answer seductively, rubbing him over the fabric.

  He groans. “You’re trying to kill me woman.” I seal his words with a kiss as he squeezes my breast and runs his finger over my puckered nipple.

  I moan into his mouth. “That feels nice.” I break the kiss, and his lips move to my neck. My head lolls around as he presses kisses all over my sensitized skin.

  “You keep making those sweet sounds, and I am going to have a very hard time taking things slow.” He growls. “The things I want to do to you.”

  “I can’t wait.”

  Then, I yawn.

  “Wow.” He laughs.

  “Don’t give me that look. It’s been a long day. I should get going. I have to be up for work early tomorrow.” I stand up from the couch, feeling the swell of my lips from hours of kissing and necking.

  “Curfew, huh?” he jokes as I reach behind me to reclasp my bra, since he undid it. “Here let me,” he says, standing from the couch and adjusting his hard-on.

  He places a chaste kiss on my lips. “Don’t worry. You look like you’ve been making out for hours.”

  “Ha-ha! Very funny.” I roll my eyes.

  “Will you come back tomorrow after my game?” he asks.

  I nod.

  I kiss him and walk out the door. My body is humming, my insides are warm. I head to my bedroom, slide into bed, and fall asleep, truly happy.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Myles

  Flynn has been over the last few nights, and we’ve basically spent the evenings making out. It feels so good to have her back in my life. Now it’s Saturday, and I want to take her shopping for Christmas. I knock at the door to Oli’s apartment and wait. It’s already noon, but when he waves me in he looks like he just got out of bed.

  “Hey, man.” His hair is mussed, and his eyes look puffy from being tired. He must have been out until late last night after our game. We won, so I know most of the single guys went out and probably got laid.

  I look around for Flynn.

  “She’s getting ready. Said you guys are going Christmas shopping. She looks happy.” He gives me a look that says he can’t believe it.

  “Things are good, man,” I admit.

  His eyes narrow. “You haven’t said anything to her, have you?” He keeps his voice low.

  I shake my head. “No, but I need to. I can’t take things further without being completely open and honest with her. I promised her that.”

  “Fuck, man. I don’t know what to do. I’m terrified.”r />
  Flynn comes sauntering down the hallway in a pair of light blue skinny jeans, dark black boots, and a red sweater. She’s gorgeous.

  “Hi, there.” My gaze runs over her body unabashedly.

  Oli turns away to the kitchen.

  She gives me a peck on the cheek. I’m assuming she’s keeping the kiss G-rated for her brother’s sake.

  “Ready to go?”

  She gets a coat out of the closet.

  “You’re beautiful.”

  Oli rolls his eyes.

  “Thanks,” she says softly.

  At the mall, Christmas music rings through the speakers, and the decorations give the place a warm holiday feel. I walk with her hand in mine, knowing full well that if someone spots me it will draw unwanted attention. I take the chance, though, because when I’m with her, I want to touch her as much as possible.

  “What are we shopping for?” she asks.

  “We have the team annual Christmas Party coming up. I was hoping you’d be my date?” I ask.

  “Sure, sounds great.”

  I smile. “It’s pretty formal. I thought we could go by the department store. I need a suit.”

  She bites her lip. “I’d probably need a dress, too.”

  “I also kind of wanted to see what you’re into so I know what to buy you for Christmas.”

  She blushes. “Presents aren’t necessary. You know I don’t care about that stuff.”

  “I know, but I want you to have something special from me.”

  “We’ll see.” We continue walking hand in hand toward the department store.

  “I also need to buy Oli and Sloane some gifts,” she mentions as we enter a section of cocktail dresses. “Let me see what they have here. Maybe you can help me out,” she suggests.

  I’ve never been shopping with a woman.

  “Yeah, okay.”

  She begins to sift through dresses on racks.

  “I can’t remember the last time I needed a cocktail dress,” she says. “I wear the same type of suits every day. I’m getting bored of myself.”

  “I saw you in those suits, and you looked sexy as hell.” She blushes.

  “I want something different,” she says. “You were right when we spoke on the phone. I don’t do anything fun. I’m an old twenty-five-year-old.” She pauses, picking out a dress. “Oh! I love this color. What do you think?” She drapes it over the front of her.

  “I think you’d be beautiful in anything, but I like that blue. It brings out the color in your eyes.” I don’t mention the semi I’m sporting when I visualize her in it. “You should go try it on.”

  “Yeah, okay.” She looks around us, I’m assuming for a sales person. There is no one in sight so we make our way to a lady at the cash register.

  “Didn’t you say we should keep things low key?” she asks, biting her lip. “I mean, won’t someone spot you here with me?”

  I point to the baseball cap on my head. “You mean this doesn’t scream inconspicuous?”

  She laughs and gives me a lopsided grin. “Not exactly.”

  “I know what I said, but I want to spend time with you doing everyday things, too. But at the end of the day, we’ll have to face the gossip eventually.”

  She tilts her head from side to side. “You’re right. Even though it would be nice to have our privacy for a while.”

  We ask the saleslady for a dressing room. The change area has a couch and is set up like a little waiting room. While Flynn is changing, I remove my jacket since it’s hot back here. It takes her a little longer than I expect. After a while I call out, “Ah…Tink…everything okay in there?”

  “Myles…” Her tone sounds a little distraught. “I can’t leave the change room looking like this. I’m tall for a girl. This dress is too short.”

  I try to bite back my laughter. She’s adorable, and she has the sexiest legs I’ve ever seen. I stand up from the couch and walk over to her dressing room door, giving it a little knock. “Tink.”

  “Yeah?” Her voice is high-pitched.

  “Let me in,” I say softly. I hear the latch, then the door slowly swings open. My breath catches. “Holy fuck.”

  The royal-blue dress hugs every inch of her slender frame and stops mid-thigh, or maybe a little higher. There is a little beading on the top part of the dress. It looks classy. She looks like a goddess.

  “Say something.” One of her legs twists.

  “You look fucking stunning.”

  “Really? I’m not used to dresses that hit mid-thigh.”

  “Question is, how do you feel in it?” I ask, and she turns to look at herself in the mirror.

  Her gaze shoots to mine. “I like it. It’s fun, I think. It makes me feel young,” she admits.

  “Good. Then it’s the right dress.” I charge toward her like a beast after its prey. “I’ve missed you,” I say before I kiss her. I smash my lips to hers. She doesn’t push me away like I expect her to, and my pulse races as she threads her fingers through my hair and kisses me back. Our tongues swipe and mesh as our bodies press together.

  My self-control is waning. I’m only human.

  “The door,” she says. I can’t stop kissing her, so I take her with me and lock the door. I walk her back until her body is pressed between me and the wall, and she does something unexpected. She reaches down and pulls the dress up to her hips and wraps her leg around my waist, showing me that her self-control is also hanging by a thread.

  “Oh, Myles,” she moans into my mouth.

  “I want to get you off so badly.” My tone is low and guttural.

  “Please,” she begs. And I reach down and slide a finger into her panties. This isn’t the way I expected to touch her for the first time, but she needs this. Her body seems as feverish as mine. I slide my finger in and out of her, and she moans.

  My dick pulsates behind the zipper of my jeans. I take a breath. “Baby, you need to keep it down, or we are going to get arrested,” I whisper in her ear.

  She nods, and she squeezes her eyes shut. I continue to roll my hips into her, praying I don’t actually lose my shit, because between grinding against her taut body and dipping my finger into her warm opening, I feel like a teenage boy. Her body begins to convulse, and I know she’s coming. An electrical jolt runs down my spine, and I focus on slow breaths, thinking of Flynn. Small whimpers leave her mouth, but she does a good job of staying quiet. When she comes down from her climax, I press slow, soft kisses along her nape and watch little goose bumps rise over her skin. She opens her eyes lazily.

  “That was…” She’s speechless.

  “Tell me about it.” I lower her down, my heart still hammering. My very prevalent hard-on is pressed against the zipper of my jeans.

  “Oh no… Let me take care of that.” She licks her lips, and I picture those luscious lips wrapped around my dick.

  I close my eyes and search for some self-control. “I’m okay. Don’t worry.” I adjust myself. “I don’t want this to be about me,” I say, meaning every word. Hell, I’ve had blue balls these last few nights, so what is another day.

  “Thank you.” She presses a sweet kiss to my lips.

  “You taking the dress?”

  She looks dazed. “Huh? Oh! Yeah.” She smooths her hair down. “I’m thinking I like this dress a lot.” She smirks devilishly, running her hands down her body.

  A low growl escapes me. My body heats, watching her little show.

  She bursts into laughter, the apples of her cheeks a healthy red.

  “What?” I ask curiously.

  “Nothing…I mean, I’m so attracted to you. I just can’t believe that any of this is happening.”

  “I know exactly what you mean.” In my head, she is still Tink. Still my best friend’s sister and my best friend. Only she isn’t forbidden anymore. My mind is still processing that little detail.

  She shakes her head, and her laughter dies. “Let me get changed,” she says, and I realize she’s asking me to step out of the dressing
room.

  “Really? After that?”

  “Myles, come on. I’m s-shy.”

  “I don’t know if I’m supposed to find that hot, but I do.” She places her hand on my chest and pushes me out the door, a wide smile on her face.

  “You’re waiting out there.”

  I leave so she can get her clothes back on. When she comes out, she says, “Let me just look for a couple more things.” I follow behind her as she walks through the racks and picks out a black dress.

  “I don’t need to try it on. It should fit.” She takes the two dresses and turns back to me. I still feel overheated from that little tryst we shared.

  “Okay. Now it’s your turn. Let’s find you a suit,” she says.

  I shake my head. “Not happening today. I don’t think I can be around any more dressing rooms with you unless your mine to take,” I say, looking down at her. Her blue eyes blaze. I swipe a hand over my mouth. “Shit. Was I the one who said we need to take things slow?”

  She smiles and nods.

  “I’m an idiot then.”

  “No, you’re sweet and considerate.”

  She walks over to the cashier. “Can I buy you the dresses?” I ask.

  “I’ve got it, but thanks for offering,” she answers.

  “It’s for my team Christmas party. I’d really like to pay. Besides I’m probably going to enjoy you being in those dresses more than you are.”

  Her lip twists. “I appreciate the gesture. I do.” She places her palm on my chest. “I’ll pay. It feels good to treat myself.”

  “How can I argue with that?” I place a chaste kiss to her lips, and she pays the salesperson.

  From there, we head into the main mall, where she buys me, Oli, Sloane, and herself each a Santa sweater with elves on it as a joke. The sweater is unisex, which means we will all be matching Christmas eve. She buys her friend a bracelet from Pandora. While she is in the Pandora shop, I slip into the jewelry store a few doors down and pick up a little something for her. We finally head home, and I can’t help replaying that hot-as-hell make-out session we had in the dressing room.