Lost Angel

by Kitty Neale

  ‘Yeah, so you said, but at least she didn’t twig that you’re pregnant.’

  ‘I’m not so sure. She went on and on about us being too young for marriage, and as she knew about Billy, I think she was suspicious.’

  ‘There’s no point in worrying about it. We’ve left London now and I doubt you’ll see her again.’

  ‘But I’d like to. Surely we’ll go back now and then to see your parents?’

  ‘I dunno…maybe. Now are you sure you don’t want me to fetch you a cup of tea?’

  ‘I’m sure.’

  ‘Right, see you downstairs then.’

  For a few minutes Ellen remained snuggled under the blankets, her thoughts drifting. When the awful truth dawned that she was pregnant, she’d hardly seen Janet. Instead, with the perfect excuse of the coal shortage, she had hidden away in her room nearly every evening and in desperation had turned to God again, praying for help. There had been no answer, yet if a heavenly Father existed, she’d turned away from him and perhaps that was why her prayers had remained unanswered. Yet had they? Percy had come to the rescue, married her, and though it wasn’t really a true marriage, perhaps one day it could be. Maybe she would grow to love him, and, at this thought, Ellen threw back the blankets. She couldn’t leave everything to her mother. Percy was her husband and it was time to cook his breakfast.

  It was gone ten o’clock before the last of the unpacking was done and the cupboards sorted.

  ‘Right, Ellen, if you’re not going to do it, I’m taking that tray back to Valerie,’ said Hilda.

  ‘No, I’ll go,’ Ellen insisted, finding that she was looking forward to meeting their new neighbour.

  As Ellen carried the tray along the small garden path, she saw that the small, wooden gate ahead had blown open, the catch loose. It would be something for Percy to fix later and she wondered how he was getting on at the nursery. It was still cold, but there were signs of spring in the front garden, shoots emerging on some of the small shrubs. A few early daffodils were in bloom, and other bulbs were poking their head out of the soil. She saw weeds, lots of weeds, and itched to pull them out, but first of all she had to take this tray along to Valerie.

  It was only a little way along the lane to Mayflower Cottage and Ellen floundered, wondering how she was going to knock on the door with the tray in her hands. No sooner had the thought crossed her mind than the door was flung open.

  ‘Hello, and thanks for bringing that back, though I’m not sure who you are.’

  ‘You met my mum and dad. I’m Ellen, their daughter,’ she said, gazing with amazement at Val’s wonderful, golden hair. How did she manage to make those waves, or were they natural, she wondered, wishing she too had hair like that.

  ‘Will you be living in Lavender Cottage too?’

  ‘Yes…and my husband.’

  ‘Well, I never. It’ll be lovely to have someone of around my own age close by. If you can spare the time, come on in.’

  ‘Thanks,’ Ellen said, thinking that Val looked a lot older than her, probably in her mid-twenties.

  ‘Take your coat off and sit down,’ Val urged, taking the tray. ‘It’ll be nice to have a chat.’

  Ellen did just that, but as she held her coat over her arm now, Val spoke again.

  ‘Like me, you’re pregnant. It’s nice we’ve got something in common.’

  Ellen looked down with a start, sure that though she was now four months pregnant, her baggy jumper hid her tummy.

  ‘How do you know I’m pregnant? Did my mother tell you?’

  ‘No, she didn’t mention it, but I can always tell. It’s something in the face that gives it away.’

  Ellen sat on the chintz-covered sofa and, as a wayward spring poked her, she shifted sideways. Val sat opposite, close to the range, then said, ‘I used the last of my tea earlier this morning, but I’ve got some homemade apple juice. Would you like some?’

  ‘No, I’m fine, thanks.’

  ‘Is your husband going to be working around here?’

  ‘Percy, yes, he’s working at a nearby plant nursery. A friend of the family is starting it up, but it’ll be a while yet before it opens.’

  ‘That’ll be Grange House and grounds. I saw it had been sold.’

  There was a pause in the conversation so, filling the gap, Ellen asked, ‘What does your husband do?’

  ‘My Bob works on Elmwood Farm. He was off out early this morning to do the milking, but as it’s Sunday he’ll be home by twelve.’

  ‘Will this be your first child?’

  ‘Yes, and I’m not sure if I want a boy or a girl. What about you?’

  ‘I don’t really mind,’ Ellen said. ‘Mine’s due in August. What about yours?’

  ‘Maybe late August or early September, but lovely that we’ll both be having them around the same time. I tell you what. My old mum showed me a way of finding out what sex the baby will be. Do you want to give it a go?’

  ‘Er…I’m not sure. What would you have to do?’

  Val lifted a wooden box from the mantelpiece and, sitting down again, she rummaged inside, pulling out a length of ribbon with a long, wooden pendulum on the end.

  ‘All I have to do is to hold this over your tummy. I’ll ask if your baby is a girl, and if it rotates in a circle from left to right, the answer is yes.’

  ‘What if it’s a boy?’

  ‘Silly, if it’s a boy the answer is no and it won’t move.’

  ‘Surely that can’t work?’ Ellen said doubtfully. ‘We won’t know unless we give it a try. Go on, lie down.’

  Despite herself, Ellen found that she was intrigued and lay on the sofa, her head propped up on a cushion.

  ‘This seems silly,’ she said, giggling.

  ‘It won’t work if you don’t take it seriously,’ Val warned as she wrapped the ends of the ribbon around her forefinger. She then dangled the pendulum over Ellen’s stomach. ‘We just need to wait until it’s still and settled before I ask the question.’

  Ellen had composed herself now and waited until at last, satisfied, Val asked, ‘Is this baby a girl?’

  At first there was no movement, but then slowly but surely the pendulum began to circle from left to right, gaining momentum, going faster and faster.

  ‘My, that was strong,’ Val said. ‘You’re definitely having a girl.’

  ‘It was you, it had to be. You made the pendulum move.’

  ‘Now why would I do that? If you had a boy I’d look proper silly.’

  ‘Well, yes, there is that.’

  ‘Swap places and try it on me.’

  Ellen took the pendulum, but felt silly as she mimicked Val’s actions. She found it difficult to keep the pendulum still, sure then that Val had somehow held it in a way to make it circle, but nevertheless she asked, ‘Is this baby a girl?’

  Nothing changed, no definite circle, and, grinning, Val said, ‘I reckon I must be having a boy.’

  Sceptically, Ellen said, ‘I wouldn’t bank on it.’

  ‘We’ll just have to wait and see,’ Val said as she sat up again, patting the seat beside her, ‘but I’m looking forward to saying “I told you so”.’

  ‘You said your mother showed you how to do it,’ Ellen said as she returned the pendulum. ‘Does she live around here?’

  ‘No, bless her, she died four years ago. This was her cottage, and, as my dad passed on when I was a baby, it came to me.’ Val paused, her eyes saddening. ‘My mum was a wonderful woman and she taught me a lot. She could even do healing.’

  ‘Healing? What do you mean? Was she a nurse or something?’

  Val chuckled. ‘No, nothing like that. Mum was a spiritual healer and could sense things with her hands. People used to come from Guildford Town, Christmas Pie, and they all said they could feel the heat radiating from her palms. She managed to help so many of them, but of course there were those that she couldn’t and it always saddened her.’

  ‘Can you do this healing?’

  ‘No, I haven’t inherited my
mother’s gifts. I can sometimes sense pain, but that’s all and occasionally I get feelings about things.’

  ‘What do you mean by gifts?’

  ‘I don’t think I should tell you. You already think I’m daft.’

  ‘No, no, of course I don’t,’ Ellen protested. ‘Some of the things you’ve said sound a bit strange to me, but that doesn’t make you daft. A woman once told my mum about a vision she’d had, and I went to see an old lady who used rune stones. Is that what you mean by gifts?’

  ‘Could be, there are all sorts. We’ve all got them, but most people spend their lives ignoring them.’

  ‘When the old lady cast the stones she told me I’d see a sign that would bring me peace. Do you know what she meant?’

  ‘Goodness me, I’ve no idea. I’ve never even seen rune stones,’ Val said as she rose to her feet.

  Ellen felt it was a signal for her to leave, and not wanting to outstay her welcome she stood up too.

  ‘I’d best get back. We’ve finished the unpacking, but there’s a stack of washing waiting to go in soak.’

  ‘If you get the chance, pop along to see me tomorrow,’ Val suggested.

  ‘Thanks, I’ll do that.’

  ‘That’s good because I have a feeling you and I are going to become good friends. Well, bye for now.’

  Ellen walked the short distance back to Lavender Cottage, intrigued by Val. She had talked about spiritual healing, gifts, and that thing with the pendulum was odd too. It had to be a game and surely it couldn’t work? Yet even as this thought crossed her mind, Ellen wondered if she really was going to have a baby girl.

  Chapter 42

  By April, with so much to do setting up the shop, Hilda found herself tired, but other than worrying about Doug, she was still really happy. He was doing his best, had planned the shop’s layout, but there was little now he could do. He’d had to stand back while the carpenters put up shelving and she could see he was growing frustrated with the handicap of his back.

  With the men working inside, they were both standing outside the shop and watching the newly delivered greenhouse going up. Hilda smiled, saying, ‘Look at Gertie. She calls it supervising, but from here it looks more like she’s shouting orders as usual.’

  ‘It’s just her way,’ Doug said as they continued to watch the activity. Percy was mucking in, but Ellen was standing back. ‘Ellen’s getting a bit fed up. In her condition, there isn’t much she can do at the moment.’

  ‘There’ll be plenty for her to get on with once the stock plants start arriving.’

  ‘If Gertie doesn’t get a move on with ordering them, there won’t be much in the way of profit this year.’

  ‘From what Ellen said, there’ll be some for sale, but most will be kept for base stock and used for propagating. It seems Gertie isn’t worried about making a profit yet.’

  ‘That just leaves the shop and I can’t see the tools and things you’ve ordered attracting many customers.’

  ‘Gertie knows that and she’s prepared to take a loss on the shop too.’

  Doug pursed his lips, quiet then as they continued to watch the greenhouse going up, but then he said, ‘I might have an idea.’

  ‘What sort of idea?’

  ‘Let me give it a bit more thought first,’ he said, then turned to go back inside. ‘To start with, where are those seed catalogues?’

  ‘Under the desk, but what do you want them for? We’ve already ordered seeds and a display rack.’

  Doug didn’t answer and, shaking her head, Hilda followed him inside. No doubt Doug would tell her when he was good and ready. Some tools had been ordered from local craftsmen but until they and the other bits and pieces she’d ordered had been delivered, all they could do was to wait. She saw that the carpenters had nearly finished the shelving, and hopefully by the end of May they’d be ready to open.

  Ellen knew she wouldn’t be allowed to do anything, and her frustration was mounting. They were all over-protecting her, with Gertie refusing to let her help with preparing the ground. The greenhouse was up now, the work done, the men gone, and, as they stood admiring it, Ellen said, ‘Gertie, are you going to order plant stock now?’

  ‘With some of the ground prepared and the greenhouse up, yes. I’ll get on to it later.’

  ‘I’ll be glad when they arrive, but until then I’m doing nothing to justify my wages. I might as well stay at home.’

  ‘Don’t be silly. You’ve done a lot in helping me to plan the grounds, and I could do with your input when it comes to placing the orders. It was all fruit and vegetables on the smallholding, but you know far more about flowers, shrubs, and trees than me.’

  ‘Gertie, that isn’t true. I know you’ve been reading up on them.’

  ‘Yes, a bit, but I don’t feel confident enough to tackle it on my own and need someone to chew over ideas with. It’s funny really, but before you married Percy we were thinking about offering you a job as our housekeeper. Like me, Maureen doesn’t like housework or cooking, but that all changed as soon as she saw the house. She fell in love with it on sight, and now likes nothing better than staying at home to keep it nice. She’s even learning to cook and shows no interest in developing the plant nursery. So you see, my dear, your help is now going to be invaluable to me.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Yes, really. Now I don’t know about you, but I could do with a hot drink. What about you, Percy?’ Gertie called. ‘Would you like a cup of coffee?’

  ‘I won’t say no,’ he said. ‘I’ll just check that all the windows fit properly first.’

  ‘Righto,’ Gertie said before marching off.

  Ellen didn’t follow her immediately, but instead wandered up to Percy, saying, ‘Did you hear that? Gertie wants my help with ordering stock.’

  ‘Yes, and I can see you’re chuffed.’

  ‘I am, and as I’m not even allowed to dig in a bit of fertiliser, at least I’ll feel that I’m doing something.’

  ‘You’re five months gone now. Of course you can’t do digging.’

  ‘Now you sound as bad as Gertie and my mother. I’m not ill, I’m pregnant.’

  ‘I don’t know anything about having babies so all I can do is follow their lead. If I let you help me with manual work your mother would have my guts for garters, let alone Gertie. It’s bad enough having one mother-in-law, but sometimes it feels like I’ve got two.’

  ‘You poor thing. Is it that bad?’

  Percy grinned. ‘Now you’re being sarcastic.’

  ‘Talking of mothers-in-law brings me to mine. I love Mabel and I’m glad you’ve patched things up with her and your dad.’

  ‘With you and your mum nagging me I didn’t have a lot of choice.’

  ‘I don’t nag. It was just a bit of gentle persuasion, that’s all.’

  ‘If you say so,’ he said sceptically as his eyes roamed over the greenhouse again. ‘Anyway, I’d best get on with checking those windows.’

  ‘I’ll see you in the shop,’ Ellen said as she walked away. She was comfortable with Percy now, but as they lived in the same house, slept in the same room and both worked at the smallholding, it wasn’t surprising. He was still keeping to his promise, but on the odd occasion he would give her a brief hug or a chaste kiss on the cheek. Ellen bit on her lower lip. She liked Percy, was sort of fond of him, but still dreaded the time when she would have to allow his lovemaking.

  Not yet, it would be ages yet, Ellen thought, forcing her worries to one side. Soon they’d be ordering plant stock and she was looking forward to wading through what was on offer. In her mind she was already picturing wisteria, and a showpiece entrance of it dripping from arched trellises. Buddleias, she’d suggest those, and roses of all varieties – in fact, plants for every season.

  Gertie went to check on the carpenters as soon as she went into the shop, pleased to see how well things were progressing. Hilda was sweeping up behind them, and Doug was sitting at the desk, scribbling on bits of paper.

 
‘Hello, Doug, and what are you up to?’

  ‘I’m working on an idea.’

  ‘What sort of idea?’ Gertie asked as Ellen now walked in to join them.

  ‘I’m not really ready to talk about it yet. It still needs more costing to see if it’s viable.’

  ‘Tell me anyway, and, Hilda, make us all a cup of coffee.’

  ‘Yes, madam.’

  ‘I’ll make it, Mum.’

  ‘No, Ellen. I was told to do it,’ she said, walking off to the tiny sectioned-off staff area.

  Gertie lifted her eyebrows, but then perched on the edge of the desk, saying brusquely, ‘Well, Doug, what have you got in mind?’

  ‘Annuals,’ he said, pointing to the seed catalogue. ‘It’ll bulk up the other stock on offer. So far I’ve worked out the price of seeds, along with trays and soil. I think there’d be a decent profit.’

  ‘It’s a bit late to think about annuals.’

  ‘If we start them off in the greenhouse we can force them on.’

  ‘Maybe, but I can’t see many people wanting to buy them.’

  ‘A lot of men from around here work in London and, not only that, many women are still working too. Their lives are busier now, with less time to spend on gardening. Ready-made plants might be just what they need.’

  Gertie turned it over in her mind. She didn’t really want to sell annuals, felt they were a waste of time and effort, and not only that, for some time yet, making a profit wasn’t an issue.

  ‘Well, Gertie, what do you think?’

  She looked at Doug, saw the appeal in his eyes, and with Ellen straining at the bit for more to do, maybe it was a good idea. Both Doug and Ellen could work together sowing the seeds, both sitting down, and they could do the same when it came to transplanting.

  Gertie knew little about pregnancy, but Hilda had lost a baby and perhaps it was something that ran in the family. She certainly didn’t want to risk the same thing happening to Ellen and her mind was almost made up when she said, ‘Well…I suppose we could use the trays again so they wouldn’t be wasted, but show me your figures.’