Summer Heat

by Carly Phillips

  On the ride back to my apartment, I debate whether or not I should ask her any questions. I decide not to. She tells me that her parents are in DC for the week. She explains that she thinks she remembers a time when they were a happy family—before her brother died—but it’s been hell living with them most of her life. I listen quietly and send Aubry a text message, asking him to please stay at Aimee’s house tonight. Cole’s flight gets in at 8:00, and I want us to be alone for the night.

  At 9:00, the door opens, and I hear Cole speaking to Bruce. He knocks on my bedroom door three times, and I open it. He leans in and gives me a big wet kiss on the lips before crushing me into his chest. I breathe in his scent—masculine Christmas tree mixed with Jean Paul Gaultier—and hug him tightly, bracing him and myself for what’s to come.

  “Cole, I found something out about my nightmares…and my past…and everything,” I say rushed as I shuffle from one foot to the other.

  He frowns narrowing his eyes and grabs my arms to pull me to the bed. He sits me between his legs and kisses my head.

  “What’d you find, baby?” he asks softly.

  I take a deep breath and look him straight in the eyes. There’s no point in me blinking back my impending tears at this point. I weep for family, friends, love, and the existence of bastards who punish children for their parents’ sins.

  “Cole,” I say before taking a deep breath. “Remember how I told you about that little boy? Nathan?” I ask brokenly as he wipes my tears from my face.

  He furrows his eyebrows and nods. “Yeah...”

  I let out a strangled sob before standing and walking to my purse. I take a deep breath as I unzip it and take out the tattered Rainbow Brite doll. I see recognition flash across his eyes as he stares back at me completely dumbfounded with his mouth hanging open.

  “What the fuck?” he says horrified. His voice barely a whisper.

  I fall to my knees and weep loudly with my face in my hands. I hear the bed creak when he gets up and walks over to me. He gets down on his knees in front of me and holds me. He grabs my tear-stricken face between his hands and examines me like he’s looking at me for the first time. I look at him the same way. Then, after a minute, our bodies crash together again. I feel his body quaking beneath me as his own grief trembles through. We hold each other for minutes, hours, days. When we finally calm down, we sit next to each other.

  “So…you’re...oh God. I’m...” he says, breathing heavily and wiping tears from his own face. “Your nightmares?”

  I nod. “They’re about that night. Do you remember now?”

  “No. I remember it was awful, but I don’t remember it. I do remember you though,” he says, caressing my face with the back of his hand. “My princess.”

  I smile through my tears. “Your princess?”

  “Yeah,” he sighs. “I always thought you were a princess, but I never wanted to tell you that. I wanted you to act like a G.I. Joe with me.”

  “I know,” I whisper, nodding my head. “I remember.”

  “How’d you get this?” he asks, lifting up the doll.

  “I went to your parents’ house.”

  His mouth pops open. “How? Did you know who they were?”

  “No,” I shake my head. “I think I had some suspicions for a while. Well, sort of...you know my friend, Aimee?” I wait until he nods, but he looks horrified. “She does these things that remind me of you sometimes, but I just figured it was a coincidence. Anyway, she’s...your sister.”

  He gasps as if I’ve punched him in the stomach. “What?”

  “I know. It’s a lot to take in. Trust me, when I was at her house today, I thought I would leave in a gurney.”

  “Does she know?” he asks, still horrified.

  “No,” I shake my head rapidly. “I didn’t want to tell her. I wanted to tell you first. I don’t even know how I would tell her.”

  He raises his eyebrows and nods. “So my parents think I’m missing?”

  “They think you’re dead,” I whisper.

  “Oh, God,” he says hoarsely as tears stream down his face. I hold his face to my chest and stroke his hair as he weeps quietly, the same way he’s comforted me so often in the past.

  We spend the rest of the night talking about what we remember and looking through my pictures.

  “Do you think that’s the same place you took me to that time?” I ask him as we look at a picture of us in the farm.

  He looks at me as he contemplates the possibility. “It might be. It’s completely destroyed now, so we would have never linked the two together. Let’s go tomorrow.”

  “Okay, if you’re up for it.”

  “I just don’t understand why they would put it under my name. And if my parents are alive...I don’t know. This is so confusing.” he says shaking his head slowly.

  “I know,” I reply idly twirling a strand of hair around my finger. “Do you want to meet Aimee?”

  He lets out a breath and shrugs. “I guess.”

  “I can talk to her about it and explained what I remember. I know it’s going to be hard for her to believe, but she’s great and I know you’ll love her.”

  “I just don’t understand how I don’t remember. I remember going to the farm. I remember wanting to play with you. I remember that stupid doll you used to bring along with you all the time. how can I not remember my own family?” he says in a wavering voice.

  I give him a sad smile and hold him tighter, thankful that as crazy as this is, we have each other to lean on.

  “How old is she?” he whispers later on when we’re laying in bed.

  “She’s your twin,” I whisper back. He squeezes me tighter and buries his face in my neck.

  I feel sunlight on my face and blink my eyes open slowly. I can’t even remember falling asleep last night. I look over and find Cole looking through the pictures again. My heart hurts for him, but there isn’t much I can do, other than help him and Aimee get to know each other again.

  “Good morning,” I say huskily.

  He turns his face and smiles at me. “Hey, baby.”

  “How’d you sleep?”

  “Good, actually. I always sleep good when you’re beside me,” he says as he lays down next to me and kisses my forehead. “I’m starting to remember things.”

  “Really?” I ask surprised.

  “Yeah. I remember Aimee and my mom. They used to go to Aimee’s piano lessons while I went with my dad to the farm, I guess that’s why she never went with us. I remember the night they took me, she had a cold and was sleeping with my parents.” I caress his face and feel my heart flutter as I look into his beautiful green eyes.

  When Cole is in the shower, I heard Aubry get home and go to the living room. I see him and Aimee standing in the kitchen making themselves coffee and take a deep breath before greeting them. I ask them to sit down and start to tell them everything. Aubry already knew my story for the most part, so I’m mainly filling Aimee in on it, until I get to the part about Cole. I tell her how I got kidnapped as a child, and there was a boy named Nathan with me. I tell her how I met Cole at Maggie’s. She already knows a lot about our relationship because I’ve told her about him in the past. I told her that my freak out and throwing up at her house wasn’t because of the tuna I ate—but because I figured out that Nathan was Cole.

  “What are you talking about, Blake?” Aimee asks horrified as Aubry sits there with his mouth hanging open.

  “Your brother, Nathan, is alive. It’s...” I take a deep breath. “It’s Cole,” I say softly and wait for the news to sink in.

  A plethora of emotions pass her face as she looks at me while she fidgets with the napkin she has in her hand until she tears it in little pieces. “No,” she sobs. “No. He’s dead. He’s dead. He was never found. Those people killed him.”

  I sigh and take her hand in mine, looking into her brown eyes with a sad smile. “No, babe. He’s not dead. He’s alive, and he’s here, and if you don’t want to meet him today, it’s
totally fine. We just found out yesterday, he’s still having a hard time with it himself.”

  “No,” she says shaking her head. “I want to meet him. I have to. Oh my God,” she weeps as she launches herself into me for a hug. We hold each other tightly and Aubry gets up and holds us both in his arms. The three of us snap our heads up when we hear Cole approach us and Aubry lets us go and goes to him and goes him tightly.

  “I’m so sorry, bro,” Aubry cries as he hugs Cole. Their chests both heave as they talk quietly to each other. I smile through the flow of tears that fall down my face as I watch them together. The two boys that have known each other since they were children and were raised brothers. My heart doesn’t hurt as I watch them, though. I know Aubry is glad that Cole is getting the answers he’s been searching for his whole life. Cole separates himself from Aubry and winks at me as he walks over to dry my tears before he looks at Aimee.

  “Hi, I’m Cole,” he says, extending his hand. Aimee, who’s not one for handshakes, wraps her arms around him and begins to sob loudly again. I try to stifle my own sobs with my hands as I look on. My heart swells for them because they found each other after living apart for so long, but I feel sad because I know I’ll never have this with my own family. I feel Aubry’s arms wrap around me and his head rest on my shoulder and the thought evaporates. I have the family I need right here.

  “Aimee,” she says when she lets go. “And I missed you so fucking much,” she continues as she wipes the tears from her face again. Cole laughs but has tears running down his face. I crack a smile because I’ve never seen him this emotional, and it makes me feel so good that these are happy tears. We all spend the rest of the night together, drinking wine and catching up. Cole asks Aimee not to tell their parents anything yet.

  “Cole, really, do you think they’d believe me if I told them?” Aimee asks with a raised eyebrow.

  “Good point,” he says, scrunching his eyebrows together. “Do you think they’ll ever believe it—when we decide to tell them?”

  She puts her hand over his. “Honey, if I can believe it, they’ll definitely believe it, with time. Especially Mom. She’s been dreaming of this since that night. Trust me,” she says sadly, and I can see the years of hurt that she’s been put through over something that she had no control over.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Present

  Our trip to the farm is a quiet one since we’re both still processing this new information. Cole went from elated to pissed off for not remembering. Then he was sad for his family and himself—until he settled on being relieved that we were both okay. He’s been sneaking looks of wonder at me when he thinks I’m not watching. I don’t blame him—I feel the same way. The man that I love and hope to spend the rest of my life with is the same boy who used to chase me around the farm and secretly thought of me as his princess. I smile at the thought and squeeze his hand a little tighter.

  As we drive through the tall grass, Cole curses for not thinking to bring a mower. We spot a clear area, where the grass looks as if it has been burned, and we park there. We get out and stand on the bed of the truck for a better view. Now that we remember, this place is starting to look familiar, but it’s still different from my dreams. Things looked more colorful as a child—I guess that’s one of the many truths of life, though. We sit down next to each other with our legs crossed, and face the deserted plain.

  “Do you remember why we used to come here?” he asks as he looks around.

  “No, I just remember always looking forward to seeing you,” I reply as a slow smile creeps up on my face.

  He smiles and pulls me close to him. “I remember that, too.”

  “You used to come with your dad,” I say.

  “Yeah, and you used to come with yours.”

  I nod. “I think I used to call it my grandfather’s farm, but that wouldn’t make sense...if it was, why would it be under your name?”

  He scratches his head. “I have no idea.”

  I sigh. “I’m going to go see Mark this week-again. I need him to give me more information. He must know more than he’s telling me.”

  “I’ll go with you,” he suggests.

  I purse my lips and think about it. I guess it would be okay. Mark hinted that he knew about Cole.

  “Sure, why not?” I shrug.

  Cole’s first day of work in Chicago is Monday. He brought all his stuff with him on this trip and is moving in with Aubry and me. Aimee had asked—before this ordeal—if I thought it was too sudden. I replied, “I’ve lived with him all my life, how could it be too sudden?”

  We know each other better than we know ourselves, there’s no point in doing the whole “You get your own place, and I’ll keep mine” thing. Besides, I live with Aubry. How weird would it be to tell Cole he can’t move in with me? I snort at the thought—as if he’d be okay with that.

  We stay on the farm for the better part of our afternoon before heading to see Maggie. We had promised her that we would have dinner at the house and stay the night if it got too late. I guess we were staying the night after all. We walk up the creaky porch steps, and Cole mumbles something about fixing it in the morning. I knock on the door when we reach it. We all still have a key, but I feel weird using it. Cole jams his key into the hole and turns it before I stop his hand and glare at him.

  “What?” he shrugs.

  “We don’t live here anymore, Cole.”

  Maggie opens the door as we are about to argue and shakes her head at us.

  “Blake, this will always be your house. Let the boy use his key.”

  I smile at Maggie. Her hair has gotten whiter and her face has creased with age, but her brown eyes still glow with gentle wisdom. She hugs me, and I put my arms around her wide hips. She and I are about the same height. Greg used to always call us “shorties”—but then again, he used to call anybody who had a vagina that. I follow her to the kitchen while Cole takes our bags upstairs. I wonder if he’s going to put them in my room or his. This is the first time we’ve been back here as a couple. I know he’s not even going to pretend that we’re sleeping in separate rooms, though.

  “So you and Cole finally getting along again?” Maggie asks, stirring the pot.

  I smile. “You can say that.”

  “Hmmm,” she badgers with a knowing smile. “Does that mean you’ll be making babies soon?”

  “Umm...no, that’s not what it means at all,” I reply, resisting an eye roll. “We’re taking it slow.”

  “Slow?” she laughs. “Since when have you known Cole to take anything slow?”

  I laugh. “Okay, fine. He just moved in with me and Aubry.”

  She throws her head back in laughter. “That boy has been crazy about you since the minute you stepped foot in this house.”

  “Still am, Mags. Still am,” Cole booms as he walks into the conversation. Our eyes lock, and he gives me his wide smile, showcasing the dimple on his right cheek.

  “Boy, you better take care of her heart. That’s all I’ll tell you. She was so hurt all those years. I could hear her heart breaking from across the table during Christmas dinners,” Maggie chides.

  “Her own fault,” Cole replies, sticking a piece of bread in his mouth. “She broke up with me, remember? And she never wanted to give me another chance.”

  I roll my eyes at his statement.

  “Cole, stop talking with your mouth full. It’s disgusting,” I groan. “And please let’s get off the topic of how I broke up with you and how you took advantage of that to sleep with every girl that acknowledged you. Let’s drop it.” I sigh. “Maggie, I have some things I need to ask you. Important things. Actually, we both do.”

  Maggie takes a deep breath. “I always knew you’d come back asking questions that I don’t have answers to,” she says sadly.

  “I brought photos to show you. It’s...it’s very complicated, and we can’t tell many people about it,” I explain.

  Maggie turns off the stove and sits down. “Photos of what,
exactly?” she asks while wiping her hands on her apron.

  I ask Cole to run upstairs and get me the envelope I brought. When he comes back, he hands it to me with a kiss and sits beside me. My chair squeaks loudly on the hardwood floors as he pulls it closer to his.

  “Photos of my childhood...our childhood,” I clarify, looking at Cole.

  “Both of your childhoods?” Maggie asks with a frown. “Your Aunt Shelley didn’t bring you here as a child.”

  “Maggie, that’s why I said it’s complicated,” I interrupt as I hand her one of the photos of Cole and I standing next to each other by some chickens in the barn.

  She gasps loudly and places her hands over her mouth, her brown eyes looking at us in complete shock.

  “Holy mother of pearl, that’s Cole,” Maggie says as she gapes at me. “Is that you, Blake?”

  “Yes, that’s what we’re trying to tell you. We knew each other before we met here,” I start. “We need to know. Who brought Cole here? You said it was his father, but we’re pretty sure it wasn’t.”

  She sighs and closes her eyes. “I got a call from a man that said he knew me—or of me—I can’t remember which. It was around 4:00 in the morning, maybe later, when he called. I thought it was a prank caller because I’d been getting a lot of calls from teenagers that used to mow the lawn here. Anyhow, I hung up twice before he called back again and begged me to listen to him. He sounded like he was crying, so I stayed on the line. He said he was a friend of Liam’s…” she pauses and gives me a pointed look that I don’t understand. “And Cory’s, so I stayed on the line. He told me that he was going to be dropping off a four year old boy. He said he’d explain everything to me when he got here. We hung up, and I still wasn’t sure if it was a fib or not—until I heard knocking on the door. The young man was dressed in all black. He looked familiar, but I couldn’t place him. He had the clearest blue eyes. I just couldn’t get over how young he was. He looked so scared and terribly sad. When he saw me, he started to cry. Really cry. I held him for a bit.”

  “He told me that he didn’t know where else to go. He’d gotten my phone number from his mother, and he needed to separate the two children. He didn’t give me too much information. Really, he was just upset and rambling on about needing to keep them safe. He left Cole with me. He told me his name was Cole Murphy and that his parents left him for dead. I didn’t think to call the police. Well, I did think of it, but the man told me that Cole would be in danger if I did that. He gave me information to a bank account and told me that he would deposit money in that account and in my own until Cole turned eighteen. That was it.”