by K. C. Crowne
He chuckled. “Right? What I wouldn’t give to be that young and stupid again, to just-- relive the good old days, you know?”
As soon as he said it, I could see that he regretted it.
“I mean -- being kids and all,” he quickly added.
“Right. Of course.”
Eli flipped through the pages quietly, and at each one, I watched the emotions that came over him. He smiled at many, and at other times, I thought he might cry. As he got closer to the end, I started to panic - what if he asked what I was going to put on the last page? What would I tell him?
He stayed on the last photo of us for a few moments, just staring at it.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
His apology took me by surprise.
“Sorry for what?”
“For leaving you alone in that strange place. I thought it would be paradise, but I realize now, it was hell for you and I’m sorry. I should never have left you there like that.”
“Eli, you had no choice but to go. You were in the Navy; those were your orders.”
“I know, it’s just --I can’t believe I ever thought it was a good idea to move you to San Diego with me during my training.”
“At the time, I don’t think you could have stopped me. I would have followed you to the ends of the Earth.”
“Yeah, but I shouldn’t have let you. I knew your dream was to go to Clemson, and I should have encouraged you to do that.”
“And I wouldn’t have listened. You know I’m stubborn as hell, Eli. I do what I want, and at the time, I thought moving to San Diego with you would be an amazing opportunity. I could have signed up for college in California. I’m sure they have landscape architecture programs there. I just didn’t look, because at the time, I gave myself over to you, completely. And that wasn’t healthy, I see that now, but at the time, I didn’t know any better. It was my fault, and I shouldn’t have left you the way I did either. It wasn’t right. So I owe you an apology too.”
“I forgive you. I mean, considering the circumstances, I can’t blame you at all.”
Tears flooded my eyes, and this time, they weren’t tears of sadness. More like… tears of relief. For years, I had felt guilty for hurting Eli, and to hear that he had forgiven me was like a lead weight being lifted off my chest.
I leaned over, closing the distance between us, and wrapped my arms over his shoulders. Eli seemed stunned for a moment, but then hugged me back - those thick arms holding me tightly against him.
My head was nestled into his neck, and I inhaled his scent, hoping to never forget it. I felt calmer just by being there, in his arms. Eli had always been the type of person to calm my emotions, no matter how crazy they got sometimes, and I found that nothing changed in all of those years.
His breath was warm against my skin, and even though neither one of us were in a comfortable position, we stayed that way for a long time - just holding each other. I had a feeling he needed it as much as I did.
I lifted my head, still staying close to him, and stared into his dark eyes. His face had changed over the years; he’d grown up, and he was no longer the clean-shaven boy I remembered him to be. But I found the wrinkles around his eyes and the thick, but well-groomed beard to be attractive on him. The hint of grey at the temples was a nice touch. He had always been an attractive man, but like a fine wine, Eli was one of those men who simply got better with age.
I stroked his beard, cupping his cheek into my hand. My hand felt so tiny against him, and I was, for the most part, an average-sized girl. But next to Eli, I felt so small and fragile, yet safe.
I never knew how much I had missed him until I was there, in that moment.
I missed all of him.
My body grew warm where his touched mine. He stroked my cheek in return, mirroring my moves, and continued staring into my eyes. I could tell there were things he wanted to say, and there was plenty I wanted to say too, but words didn’t seem like the best way to convey what I was feeling.
So I kissed him instead.
A chaste kiss. My lips barely grazed his, even though I wanted even more. I craved his mouth against mine, but I knew to pull back. The kiss alone was going too far already.
But before I could regret it, Eli kissed me back.
His mouth was hungry for me, pressing firmly against mine. I opened myself up to him, and his tongue swept past my lips and brushed against my own. For a second, it felt like every ounce of oxygen had left my body, then it was like he was breathing for the both of us - which was good, because I couldn’t focus on such a trivial task such as breathing when this man was kissing me.
His lips were as soft as I remembered, though his beard tickled my face - a new sensation that didn’t fit with the memory, that made me realize this wasn’t just a dream. This was real.
Eli motioned me backward, and I obliged without a second thought. He crawled up the length of my body until he was hovering directly above me, his body inches from mine but still too far away. I wrapped my legs around him and pulled myself upward, closing that distance and feeling the hardness in his jeans.
Eli let out a low growl and his eyes rolled back for a second as I rubbed myself against him.
His body clearly ached for mine as much as mine did for his.
With one hand, he reached down and pulled down the leggings I was wearing. I was thankful for not wearing jeans around the house, as these were easy to slip off - perhaps too easy. Maybe if I’d had that extra few minutes, I would have realized what we were doing was a bad idea.
But I didn’t have those few minutes, and Eli worked quickly on his own pants. No need to remove the rest of the clothes, nor did we have time. We were both so desperate, acting like we had to hurry - as if there were somewhere we had to be - but in reality, the only place he needed to be was inside of me.
Eli pressed his lips against mine as he thrust into me. His thick member stretched me open, and thankfully, I was ready for him. I was soaking wet. He slipped inside of me without a fight, burying himself as deep as he could possibly go. I still wrapped my body around him, arching upward, because I needed to be sure I had every inch of him deep inside of me.
Eli’s mouth moved down my neck, sucking and kissing as he moved in and out of my body. My nails dug into his back, through his t-shirt as my body was filled with a pleasure I hadn’t known in years.
I didn’t even feel the hard floor underneath my body or worry about us having sex in a room where someone could have caught us - all of that was far away to me.
What mattered was the moment. Feeling his thickness moving in and out of me. The wetness dripping down my thighs. His mouth exploring my flesh, sending shivers through my body every time he nibbled in a new place.
And in that moment, I was his. He could have done anything he wanted to me right then and there, I was at his mercy.
A familiar warmth bubbled down south, and I felt my orgasm rising to the surface. I was so close… so very close.
“Yes,” I whimpered, writhing beneath him on the floor. “Don’t stop. Eli, please. Oh God…”
I was hit with a wave of pleasure so intense, I screamed out his name and prayed that his mother was out for the afternoon.
As the first wave rolled over me, and a feeling of calm soon followed, Eli grabbed a hold of my body and rolled us around until I was on top of him. His fingers dug into my thighs as he helped me find a rhythm. I moved up and down, grinding myself against him.
I was frantic, hungry for more, and I knew Eli was capable of making me come more than once. Easily several times over, or at least he could in his younger days, and I was already close to orgasm number two.
His face was twisted into a look of bliss, and I rode him harder, faster. My only goal right then was to make him come. I wanted to see his sexy, chiseled features contort into bliss, to hear his throaty growl as he filled me with his seed. I wanted it more than even my own orgasm at that point.
His hands gripped my ass now, pulling me against hi
m every time I rose up above him. I’d slam down, our bodies smashing together in a way that felt almost violent but brought nothing but pleasure.
My second orgasm was intense, hitting me hard. If it weren’t for Eli’s hands guiding me, I would have fallen over, but he held me there, moving me up and down, up and down, as I rode out the best orgasm of my life. His guidance helped extend it, causing me to cry out his name over and over again as my pussy spasmed around him.
A low, animalist growl came from his mouth as he pulled me down hard against him, his cock throbbing inside of me. His eyes could hardly stay open as he filled me with his seed, my orgasm pushing him over the top.
“Yes, yes,” I whimpered, savoring the feeling of that pulsating cock.
I fell forward, my head nestled against his neck, breathing him again.
And we just relaxed like that, our bodies as one.
Eli held me, his massive arms wrapping around my entire body. I had forgotten about everything else in my life up until that point, and for a moment, it felt like we never split up. It just felt natural and normal. It felt safe.
But as I slowly came back down to earth, it hit me.
This wasn’t the reality. Eli and I weren’t always together, and we weren’t together now. I had just called off my wedding to another man, and it was too soon for all of this. Eli and I hadn’t seen each other in over a decade, and people change.
I had changed.
What had I just done?
Chapter 6
Eli
“I’m so sorry,” Charlotte said, hopping up off the floor. She quickly pulled her leggings back up, all while avoiding looking me in the eye. Her cheeks were flushed, and her red hair was standing on end. Sweat permeated her brow, which she wiped away with her hand before heading for the door.
She stopped in the doorway and bit her lower lip, finally turning to look at me. I was standing now, putting my pants back on.
“Eli, I’m so sorry, but we shouldn’t have done that,” she said. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before continuing. “I just got out of this mess with Peter and--”
It killed me to say it, but she was right. I stopped her before she could continue talking, knowing that anything she else had to say - I already knew - but hearing the words would only hurt even more.
“I know, Charlotte. I’m sorry.”
“It was my fault, Eli. I kissed you first.”
“It doesn’t matter whose fault it is. We’re both adults, and I know you’re vulnerable. I should have stopped myself.” But I couldn’t. That was the problem. The minute she kissed me, I was a goner. All rational thought had left my head - I had wanted her, and years worth of love and lust came to a head, and I acted poorly because of it.
“I really can’t risk getting involved with anyone right now.”
“I know.”
I had known it before we had sex too, but stupidly let my lizard brain take over.
“I think it’s best if I just kept my distance, until I can go back to Tennessee.”
She might as well have punched me right in the balls in that moment, but again, I couldn’t say that she was wrong.
“Alright. I’ll respect whatever you feel you need to do.”
A small smile spread across her lips, which surprised me. “You always were one of the good guys,” she said softly before leaving the room.
Dammit. The BBQ.
“Charlotte?” I called out, flinching as I said her name.
She popped her head back into the room but didn’t look at me directly.
“Yes?”
“The family BBQ starts in an hour, if you’d like to come. It’s for Skyler’s birthday. I know you don’t know her and all, but you mentioned wanting to meet the extended family.”
She frowned. “I don’t think that’s a good idea right now, Eli. But thank you.”
“Of course,” I said, looking toward the ground.
“But you can go, Eli,” she said. “I don’t want to stop you.”
“I wouldn’t want to leave you by yourself.”
“I don’t think Peter’s a serious threat with me all the way over here. I’ll not answer the door and stay locked in my room, I’m sure it will be fine.”
From everything I’d heard, she was right - Peter seemed like the type who had no problem acting out of anger, but unlike most of the dangers we’d dealt with over the years, he had no ties to any shady characters that led me to think he would cause her harm. He still didn’t know where she was at, as evidenced by some of his text messages asking to know where she was. It was highly unlikely that he had that kind of technology to track her down all the way to Utah.
But I still didn’t like it.
“Eli, please go. I really could use some time alone anyway,” she said.
Finally, I nodded. “There’s plenty of food in the kitchen, help yourself to whatever you want,” I said. “And if you feel scared or worried about anything, give me a call. I’m just down the road.”
“Thanks, Eli. I’m sure I’ll be fine.”
I knew that one of the things I needed to work on was letting people go. I could smother someone if not careful, and I knew that Charlotte needed her own space. Especially after what had just gone down.
And Skyler would be pretty damned sad if Uncle Eli wasn’t at her seventh birthday party.
I decided to give Charlotte her space, but made sure the place was locked up, that I had alarms set on my phone for anyone entering. I also had access to all the cameras so I could check on her, though none in her room as that would just be wrong. At least no one would be coming or going without me knowing.
It made me feel a little better at least.
Before leaving the room, my eyes fell on the scrapbook again. It was still on the floor, open to the last page I’d looked at. That last picture was the last one we’d had of each other, but the book itself had several more pages still left in it. Curiosity got the best of me and I flipped through.
All empty, of course.
I was about to put it away when I stopped on a page that wasn’t empty. I hadn’t seen it before.
There was that kick to the balls feeling again. It looked like Charlotte had planned to put some photos there, she had the background and border all set up in soft pinks and blues, almost like a baby announcement. I knew we’d talked about having kids one day, but we never got that far. Maybe it was a “Future Plans” page or something. Hell, I didn’t know how scrapbooking worked and I didn’t know for sure if pink and blue meant something else. It might have been a random choice of colors for all I knew.
I stared at that page for longer than I should have, almost like I was trying to figure out what was supposed to go there. Had I not shipped out when I did, what would our future have looked like?
We’d never know, I thought to myself, slamming the book shut and reminding myself not to revisit that scrapbook for at least another thirteen years, if ever. I placed it on the shelf and left the room, wondering if I should check on Charlotte before I left.
Nah, she wanted to be left alone.
The front door opened, and Mom called out, “Where are you two? The party is in full swing, and we’re missing you guys.”
I walked down the steps and found Mom standing in the foyer, her hands on her hips.
“Charlotte isn’t coming,” I said. “I’m leaving now.”
“What do you mean she isn't coming?” Mom pursed her lips and shook her head.
“Says she’s not feeling well.” Mom studied my face; she could always tell when I was lying. I tried to give my best blank mask expression.
“Well, you go on ahead. I’ll have a talk with her.”
“Please, Mom, she asked for some space.” I said.
But Mom was already up the steps, ignoring me. “Skyler has been asking for you, so hurry your butt up. Don’t keep the birthday girl waiting.”
“Yes ma’am.”
Ooo000ooo
I stepped out of my truck, and
in the distance, there was laughter. I knew without even looking that it was my family, especially by the sheer number of voices coming from that direction. I stopped at the edge of the park and smiled.
Over the last year, everyone had been popping out babies. Had you asked me a couple years ago if my mother would be a grandma, I’d have said it was uncertain. But suddenly, she had over half a dozen grandkids and at least Graham and Emmy were still trying for more.
Then there was me.
My smile wavered at the thought. Growing up, I had always imagined myself as a father. As a teenager and my early twenties, I had mapped out what my life was going to look like, and that included Charlotte and me having a couple kids of our own.
“Eli!” Skyler’s voice rang out as soon as her eyes fell on me. “You’re finally here!”
I forgot about everything else for a second and smiled. Skyler ran over to the edge of the park, not stepping off the grass, and I walked the rest of the way to meet her. In the distance, Danielle kept an eye on her, and she waved at me. I waved back.
As soon as I was on the grass, Skyler wrapped her arms around me and hugged me.
“Happy birthday, munchkin,” I said, patting her on the back.
“You won’t be able to call me munchkin for long,” the girl said, grinning up at me.
“Oh yeah? You going to be as tall as me one day?”
“Taller.” She giggled.
“Well if that’s your goal, you better eat all of your veggies.”
She playfully rolled her eyes at me. “That’s what my mom says too.”
“It’s true though.”
“Then how come I’ve never seen you eat a vegetable? You’re still tall.”
She had me there. I knew I could be better about my diet.
“Hey now, potatoes count as a vegetable, and I eat plenty of those.”
“You need greens too, Uncle Eli. That’s what my mom always says.”
“You’re too smart for your own good, you know that?”
“My mom also says that a lot.” This time she beamed proudly up at me.