by K. C. Crowne
The little girl was smart and watching her grow over the last year was something else. It seemed like every day she got bigger and smarter, and hell, maybe she was right - maybe one day she would be taller than me, though at 6’4, I found it highly unlikely.
“Wanna see my cake?” she asked, her eyes wide.
“Of course. What’s a birthday party without a cake?” I asked.
She took my large hand in her little one and guided me toward the tables where everything was set up. Everyone was there already except for mom, who had stepped away and was likely still trying to convince Charlotte to come out to the party. I waved at Mason as Skyler hurried us past him toward one of the tables.
The cake had three small tiers, and decorated with snowflakes and a snowman, with two princesses on top. Until Skyler had come into my life, I had never seen or heard of the movie Frozen, but now I could sing along to most of the songs since she’d made me watch it at least a dozen times the few times I babysat for Mason and Danielle.
“I know, I know, it’s spring, so the snowflakes are a bit weird,” Skyler said, as if she had to explain it all to me.
“I don’t think it’s weird at all,” I said.
“That’s because you get me, Uncle Eli.”
I chuckled under my breath. She had sounded so serious, it was utterly adorable. Had you asked me, once upon a time, if I would find myself talking to a seven-year-old about a Frozen-themed birthday cake and having her say that I could relate to her, I would have called you a damned liar. But there I was, and honestly, I loved it.
She was an amazing little girl, and I was thankful that Mason had bought her into my life. Kids were fun and they let you relax and simply let yourself be a little silly.
“It’s a beautiful cake, sweetheart. I’m going to go and say hi to everyone else really quickly, if you wanna come along.”
I knew the answer to that already. Because when Uncle Eli was around, Skyler was rarely far behind. The little munchkin seemed to like me a lot, even if I didn’t always understand it. She said I was her favorite.
Skyler accompanied me over to where Sam and Graham were grilling up some hamburgers and hot dogs. Both guys waved as we approached, then I watched as their faces shifted, literally looking like, “Oh shit,” as they placed their beer bottles behind their back.
And I knew they weren’t hiding it for Skyler’s sake either.
“It’s alright, guys,” I said with a laugh. “You don’t have to hide the alcohol away from me. It’s all good.”
“You sure?” Graham asked, his gaze narrowing.
“I’m not an alcoholic.” I held up my hands to stop Graham before he could counter. “I’m not. I just gave up drinking by choice because it wasn’t leading to good decisions on my part, that’s all. That and I realized that fun didn’t have to be found in the bottom of a bottle.”
It was my choice to give up alcohol. Sure, I had made plenty of bad decisions while drinking, and I partied hard for over a decade. Eventually, I just lost my taste for it.
“Yeah, I know, but it still seems like a jerk move to drink in front of you,” Sam said.
“I don’t even want to drink a beer to be honest.” And that was God's honest truth. “I have absolutely no desire. So, go ahead, it’s not going to lure me back into drinking or anything.”
I grabbed a Coke from the cooler and popped it open, making a satisfied “Ahh” sound to prove my point.
“I sure hope not. You’re doing really well, Eli,” Graham said. “And I just hope recent events won’t send you back down the spiral.”
He was being vague because Skyler was right there, but I knew what he was talking about. Considering what had happened at the house before I’d come, I couldn’t blame him for his concerns either.
“Don’t worry, brother. Trust me. I’ve got this.”
Just as I said those words, however, the universe decided to tempt me.
Mom’s rental car pulled up to the parking lot in the distance, and the passenger door opened. Charlotte stepped out of the car.
My mom was nothing if not persistent, and she could persuade pretty much anyone to do anything she asked. So why had I doubted her ability to get Charlotte to agree to come to this get-together?
Skyler took off toward our mom, who had gladly adopted the little girl as her granddaughter. My eyes stayed fixed on Charlotte who refused to look at anything but the ground in front of her feet.
“What’s up with the two of you anyway? Why is she coming with Mom?” Graham asked.
“She wasn’t feeling good; didn’t think she would be joining us,” I said, taking a swig of my soda. “But you know how Mom is, doesn’t take no for an answer.”
Mom and Charlotte approached. Charlotte offered a small smile at me as she passed by awkwardly. Mom stopped by me for only a second, whispering. “Do you know what’s wrong? She’s acting awfully strange, and she really didn't want to come.”
“I couldn’t tell you.” I didn’t dare look at my mother when I said that. She would be able to see the lie.
“I wonder if her ex is causing her a lot of problems. I hope she’ll talk to me.” Mom continued past us to join Charlotte, taking her over to where the wives were hanging out underneath a canopy with the babies.
“Alright, I’m not buying it,” Graham said.
“Buying what?”
“She wasn’t feeling good? You don’t know what’s going on? Yeah, that’s bullshit, Eli. What’s really going on here?”
I sighed. I knew there was no way I could get around lying to Graham’s face too. I prepared myself for the lecture of a century.
I looked around and found Skyler playing with her baby brother and sister over with the others. She was out of earshot, as were Mom and Charlotte.
“Charlotte and I hooked up. Before you tell me, I know it was a stupid move. We both do. We acknowledged that it can’t happen again.”
“Dammit, Eli,” Graham growled. “You’re playing with fire, you know that?”
“I know.”
He continued as if I had not acknowledged that he was right. “She’s vulnerable right now and is by no means fit for a relationship. We both know she’s never going to leave Tennessee either, her home will always come first, come before you. Do you really want to get your heart broken all over again?”
“Graham, I said I know. You’re right.”
He seemed stunned into silence for a second. Probably not used to me agreeing with him.
“I’m going to be careful. It’s one reason we’re not talking right now, and we’re keeping our distance from each other. We’re going to be a lot more careful from now on.”
Graham shook his head and muttered something under his breath, but then went back to the grill, facing away from me.
“We’re just worried about you, Eli,” Sam said.
“I know, and I appreciate it. But I’m doing the best I can to make sure neither Charlotte or myself end up hurt.”
“I believe you,” Sam said.
“Thanks, man.”
I took another swig of my Coke and turned around to find Mason. I still hadn’t had a chance to say hello him. I knew I’d have to go over to the canopy and say hi to all the wives, but I was putting that off until Charlotte wasn’t over there. Bad thinking, most likely, since I had a feeling she was going to be hanging out over there a lot.
My eyes fell on her. Penelope had handed her Lily, one of Sam’s quadruplets, and the two women were smiling so big. The look in Charlotte’s eyes as she played with the one-year-old tugged at something deep inside of me. It was hard to breathe for a second.
That was supposed to be us, I thought to myself. We were supposed to have the large family.
“You okay, Eli?” Sam asked.
“Yep. Doing just fine,” I lied.
Mason was headed our way with his son, MJ strapped to his chest, and his daughter, Elianna, strapped to his back. Both of them fighting against the straps holding them to their father.
<
br /> I hurried over to him, happy for the distraction.
“Looks like you have your hands full there,” I said. “Let me get Elianna for you.”
“Thanks, Eli,” he said, turning around so I could whip the youngster from the carrier. She calmed a little once free from the wrap and stared at me with big eyes. “Danielle is playing a game with Skyler, so I took them off her hands for a bit… but I’m afraid they both need a diaper change.”
The old Eli probably would have said, “Good luck with that, man. You’re on your own.” But that was before I’d changed countless diapers already. Nowadays, a dirty diaper was nothing for me.
“I’ve got ya. I’ll get this one if you take care of MJ,” I said.
“Sounds like a plan,” Mason said. “And thanks, Eli. You know I always appreciate the help.”
Chapter 7
Charlotte
Penny Whitmore was exactly as I remembered her from school. Smart as hell. Sweet. And beautiful to boot. And her family was truly something to envy. Not that I had ever considered having multiples myself - the idea sounded absolutely crazy. But seeing it in person, and the way Sam rushed in when the other three woke up from their naps - made me think it also sounded kind of nice.
The kids would always have each other to play with, to confide in. They would all grow up together. Sure, Penny and Sam seemed to have their hands full, but they seemed to have a system in place that almost made it look easy.
“It’s feeding time for the little monsters,” Penny said.
“I can help you with Lily.” Truth be told, I really didn’t want to let the baby go. She was so sweet, and it had been a long time since I’d held a baby, and my motherly instinct kicked right in.
“Thank you, Charlotte. I really appreciate that.” Penny grabbed one of the other little ones while Sam got started on feeding one as well.
As Penny helped me get ready to feed Lily, my eyes fell on Eli a few feet away. He was helping Mason with one of the twins, holding a baby about the same age as Lily. The little girl had a pink dress and a bow in her hair the size of her head. He looked so happy and natural holding her, smiling down at the adorable little cherub who stared back up at him with a grin of her own.
My gaze was glued to the image of Eli holding the baby in his arms, carrying her toward the bathroom with Mason at his side with her brother.
There was an ache in my heart.
It was like a piece was missing.
Eli always worried if he would make a good father, and I had insisted that he would. He feared that he didn’t know how to be one because his own dad wasn’t around much. But seeing that image of him with his niece, I knew in my heart that Eli would have loved his children more than life itself. It was clear he already loved his brothers’ kids that way.
This could have been us.
Sure, our first child would have been twelve by now.
Twelve.
It blew me away that I could have been the mother of a near teenager. And chances were good that we wouldn’t have stopped there. I might have had a menagerie of rugrats around me right now had I not--
No, stop thinking like that, Charlotte.
Eli disappeared into the bathroom, and I focused on the child in my arms. Lily grinned up at me with mashed sweet potato dripping from her chin. Her chubby little arms moved up and down at her sides as she opened her mouth for another bite.
I wiped at her chin and Lily pushed my hand away, her smile turning to a frown as she fussed at me.
“I think she’s done for now,” Penny said. “She goes from starving to won’t take another bite with little to no warning.”
The other babies were back in their bouncy chairs, with Sam watching over them. Their little eyes getting heavy.
“She’s going to be falling asleep any second,” Penny said. “It’s past their naptime.”
She reached for the child, and it was hard letting her go. I wondered to myself if I would ever get to be a mother myself. I wasn’t getting any younger, and now I was newly single and in no way fit to date. Would I ever get a family of my own?
I let Lily go to her mother, and the fussing stopped as Penny patted the girl on the back and whispered softly to her.
Penny was busy taking care of her kids, and I really didn’t know anyone else besides Eli’s brothers who all had their hands full. Graham was actively ignoring me, so there was no reason to go speak to him. I began searching for Mrs. Harvey and saw her over at the cake table with Skyler.
I stood up and started walking in that direction when I noticed Eli was also headed for his mom, the baby from earlier still in his arms.
And he wasn’t alone.
Mason wasn’t with him this time. No, now he was accompanied by a leggy brunette who looked like she’d stepped from the pages of a Victoria’s Secret catalog. Her hair was wavy in just the right ways and full, falling over her shoulders. Her red sundress was not only showing off her ample cleavage, but I had to think she had to be chilly - it was springtime in Utah, not the middle of summer. Clearly, she wasn’t wearing the dress because it was hot outside.
Her lips were painted bright red, and her makeup was impeccable. Her brown eyes were framed with thick, black lashes and just enough eyeliner to make them pop.
But out of all that, what I noticed first was the way her hand was resting on Eli’s arm. She was smiling at the baby, making a silly face, and Eli was laughing along with her. They were close. Very close. She was clearly comfortable with him.
I stayed frozen in my tracks, feeling like I had nowhere else to go. Facing Eli would be hard enough after what happened, but then to meet someone he might be dating too? I couldn’t do it. My feet weren’t moving forward, and I knew that I had to do something.
I had no right to be jealous, but emotions don’t always make sense.
He’s not yours anymore, Charlotte, I reminded myself.
But that didn’t stop the swarm of emotions swirling through my brain. My insides hurt in ways I never knew were possible.
I turned on my heels and realized I couldn’t go back to all the happy families with their children and spouses either. Not after what I had given up and seeing reminders of what could have all around me.
I was starting to feel a panic attack rising in me and I had to get out of there.
I took off for the bathroom, just needed a place to be alone for a few minutes. I just kept walking when I got to it, and behind it, just out of sight, was a bench facing a small lake with a fountain in the middle of it.
Best of all, there was no one around.
I plopped down on the bench and let out a sigh of relief.
Needing to clear my mind, I reached for my phone to mindlessly scroll through Facebook or Instagram. Maybe I could take some photos of the park for inspiration, something. Anything but being confronted with everyone at the party right then.
As I clicked on the home screen of my phone, I frowned. Several missed calls and a text from Alexis.
Call me, sis.
My heart raced, thinking something might have happened to our parents or Luna… It was rare that Alexis would leave her texts short and sweet like that. She had last tried to call about fifteen minutes before. I checked, and my phone was on silent. I never turned it back on after silencing it the night before, needing to silence out my ex’s texts so I could get some sleep.
I hurried up and called my sister back.
She answered on the first ring.
“What’s wrong, Lex? Is it Dad? Mom?”
“No, it’s your fucking ex-fiancé,” Alexis seemed to growl into the phone. “Do you know what that asshole is doing?”
“Besides sending me messages and being a pain in the ass? No, I really don’t know what’s going on,” I said.
“He sent out an e-mail to everyone invited to the wedding yesterday. Check your e-mail, I believe you were CC’ed on it,” she said. “But don’t read it unless you want to be sick.”
“What’s it say?” I closed my
eyes and prepared for the worst.
Peter was nothing if not petty. I knew that he was the type to throw tantrums, and that he wouldn’t handle me leaving him.
“Well, first of all, he says that he’s sorry that the wedding was postponed. He thinks this fucking wedding is still happening! Can you believe that?”
“He is delusional, Lex.”
“Oh, delusional is putting it lightly. He said that you’re currently undergoing a mental health break, clearly, you’ve been under too much stress from trying to work and dealing with the wedding. He says that things have been hard between the two of you for a while, and that last week, you got aggressive with him. He says you hit him, Charlotte! The nerve of this dude, I swear-- but that’s not all. He also said that you had been cheating on him this entire time, and that you ran away with your lover. He then ends it by painting himself as an angel, willing to take you back and forgive you if you’d be willing to get psychological help. As if you’re the one with a problem!”
My pulse was racing, and the blood seemed to burn inside of my veins. It angered me to hear this. But I also knew he’d likely pull something like this.
“Can you believe him, Charlotte?”
“Sadly, I can.”
“You sound pretty calm for someone who just had a bunch of lies sent to your nearest and dearest.”
“Well, what can I say, I expected he’d pull something like this, and I guess I just mentally prepared for it.”
“I don’t know how you do it. You’re a freaking saint or something, I tell you.”
“I don’t have your temper, that’s for sure,” I said, opening my eyes and relaxing into the booth. “It hurts me, and I wish it didn’t happen, but anyone who knows me and cares about me won’t believe those lies. If they do, they don’t really know me, obviously.”
I did, briefly, wonder if I would ever be able to walk around Red River again without the gossip mill following me around. I knew how small towns worked, and every man I dated from here on out would get labeled as the lover I left my fiancé for. And the abuse allegations? Those were serious.