I froze. Until now, I’d refused to let that thought—that inevitability—enter my mind. I sure as fuck felt it in my body—I felt it coming the second I bribed her to kiss me by her truck. But pride wouldn’t let me admit it—even after knowing the truth about that night.
There was no room for pride on the mountain though; it was the only thing that stood taller, stronger, and more menacing than my need to be right and to win whatever it was I thought I deserved.
I loved her.
She was still my dream. She was one of those pieces of me that I’d strapped to my soul as surely as I’d done with a snowboard.
I breathed in my revelation as we rode the lift back up to the top to do the run again.
This time I didn’t even think about it as I slid off the lift and strapped in before coming to a stop. Habit had taken over. Yeah, there was no way I was going to go off a kicker today—or even in the near future—but I could ride.
A chill went up my spine. I could still ride.
“Catch me if you can!” she chanted as she flew by me. A smile broke over my face—a happy one.
I was happy.
Looking in front of me, all I saw was a blank slate. Pure, unobstructed, and ready for me to carve into it whatever I wanted. My anticipation was back—the prospect of creating something on the mountain—a new future, a new purpose—washed over me like the wind.
She’d been right this whole time. And I’d had a hard time swallowing that truth because I’d been too busy choking on my pride.
Pride tells you that you are unbreakable because you deserve it. It lulls you into the clouded sense of being undefeatable. It builds you up on a podium made of ice—beautifully crystalline, cold, and lonely—and then when you become too weighed down by the unwavering belief in your supremacy, it shatters.
And where does it come from? Fear.
Pride comes from the fear that who you are will never be enough.
And over the past five weeks, Jessa had shown me that I would always be more than enough for this. And that who I was—snowboarder or not, the best or not—would always be enough for her.
With every slice into the snow, the mountain told me that I was breakable, but that I was also repairable—that where I broke is also where I would be healed stronger. It comforted me in the knowledge that being defeated is what would allow me to grow.
The faster I went, the more my anger and bitterness flew off of me like snowflakes in the wind. The mountain sliding beneath me built me back up with a solid base of humility and respect, a base that wouldn’t—couldn’t—crumble. It layered together with gratitude, not just for all of the things that I had in my life, but for my past and my mistakes.
Because they’d all brought me back here—and back to her.
I easily caught up to her, tossing a snowball at her ass as I carved around her. The way she squealed set my body on fire. I was so fucking alive right now and nothing could make me want her more.
I knew she’d follow me as I swung off the trail into the trees. Jessa was a much more cautious rider, so by the time she caught up to me, my board, helmet, and gloves were already off.
“What are you doing?” Her laughter died as I stalked towards her, the snow seemingly suspended in the air around us.
My fingers flicked open the clasp on her helmet and I watched her breaths come in sharp, steamy puffs into the air between us.
“I need you,” I growled, tossing her helmet into the snow and yanking her neck-warmer down. Cupping her cheeks, my mouth claimed hers before she had a chance to say anything about it. “I need you for making me do this.”
I drank the truth from her mouth—a sweet serum that warmed through my coldness. She moaned against my tongue.
“I need to be inside you.” I sucked her lower lip into my mouth, drawing a gasp from her. “I need to be in that hot pussy of yours, J-bird.”
She had faith in me. She had pushed me here to heal me. She’d put up with my shit. She’d done it all because she loved me, too.
“Then what are you waiting for?” she whispered breathlessly.
I dropped to my knees, my hands unstrapping her feet as my teeth closed over her core, biting her through her snowpants. Her gloved hands clamped down on my shoulders to steady herself as she gasped.
“Are you wet for me?” I rasped. “Are you ready for my cock?”
She moaned and pressed her hips against my face. “I’m always wet for you, Chance.”
I bit her pussy again, lifting one leg and then the other off of her snowboard. Sitting back on my haunches, I grabbed her board and whipped it around behind her, digging one edge hard into the snow.
I unbuttoned the front of her snowpants and they sagged immediately, revealing the soft, pale skin just above her sex.
“Turn around and down on your knees.” She followed my command immediately. “Now hold onto your bindings so that you don’t slip. I want to ride you hard and fast, think you can handle that?”
“Y-yes,” she moaned as her fingers locked around the plastic feel loop in her bindings.
I yanked her snowpants down over her ass to find those glistening pink lips staring up at me. She was so wet so I knew she was exquisitely feeling the cold. I wanted her a little cold just before I made her burn.
I groaned when I unzipped my fly, my dick angrily springing free. Red and thick, I saw stars for a second, needing to be inside of her.
My eyes drifted up to the tight entrance to her ass. “I’m going to fuck this later,” I said as I pushed my thumb against the dark hole.
She gasped and I saw thick white desire gush from her sex.
“Chance,” she pleaded my name and my dick swelled even larger in the freezing weather. “I-It hurts. I need you…” she panted. “I need you.”
“How much?” I asked in a daze, watching the snowflakes land on her swollen sex. Even Mother Nature was drawn to heat coming from her delicious lips. “Because I’m about to fuck you so hard, J-bird. I need you so bad,” I growled, sliding the head of my erection over her entrance, her juices dripping into the snow. “Can you handle that?”
I pulled out a condom from my jacket pocket, keeping one in there was a force of habit. With each word, I saw more desire pulse out of her as I rolled the condom down my dick, imagining those tight muscles inside of her clenching around me.
She panted like she’d just finished a marathon—when it hadn’t even begun. “Y-yes. I need you inside me, Chance. Please.”
I growled because neither of us had any shame in the way we talked to each other. The dirty words echoed against the white cleanliness of the scenery around us.
What we had would always stand out from the world around.
I poised my cock at her sopping entrance and then dug my fingers into the chilled flesh of her hips holding her firm as I rammed inside of her.
She shrieked at the invasion and my vision went black for a second as her tightness vibrated with shock waves at my assault. It wasn’t like the first time, but I knew every time I fucked her there would always be a moment of discomfort as she had to acclimate to my size. But, as promised, I didn’t give her that moment to recover before I slid out and plowed back all the way inside until her ass smacked against my stomach.
Her moans turned me into a man possessed—possessed by her tight fucking pussy. My hips smashed against her ass as her sex ate up my cock.
“Oh God. Oh God,” she chanted over and over. All I heard was that she felt no more discomfort. All I heard was her cheering on my body, willing it to explode.
My tongue thickened to the point where I couldn’t speak. I was fucking numb with pleasure, watching the entire length of my cock disappear inside of her over and over again. I slipped one hand around to her stomach so my fingers could find her clit.
Under my palm, I felt her stomach distend each time I plowed into her, filling her. My jaw clenched, seeing her arms shake as I pinched her clit.
“Chance, I can’t…” She trailed off. Her d
esperation turned my movements erratic—frantic. The fire that burned inside of me should have melted the whole goddamn mountain, I thought as I pumped furiously into her.
I rolled her clit between my fingers in the way that will—Fuckkk. A groan ripped from the deepest, darkest place inside of me as I felt her come around me. Like a sonic-fucking-boom, I only heard her scream after the fact—after her already-tight pussy strangled the life from my cock. Blinded, I continued to push against tight, quivering walls that tried to squeeze me out. I don’t even know how I moved, but seconds later I found my own climax, roaring from the fucking mountaintop as my desire erupted, coaxed out by her spasms around me.
I collapsed against her, my breaths evaporating into the frigid air. Neither of us were cold though. We were both burning up.
“You ok?” I asked hoarsely. I felt her back bump up and down against my chest and I was so fucking out of it I thought she was having a seizure for a split second before I realized that she was laughing.
Groaning, I slipped out of her. Tugging off the condom and tying the end, I whipped it into the set of trees closest to us. I used a glove to wipe off my dick before shoving it back inside my snowpants. I wanted her again. I wanted her ass. All bright and flushed from the cold and from me.
Later.
“Fuck,” I swore, sitting down in the snow next to her. I watched her button her pants before she looked back over and met my gaze. And then she started to laugh again—and so did I.
It was the sound of freedom. And it rang out into the silence of the snow.
“Why are you laughing?” I asked, my face hurting from my smile. She couldn’t answer me as her laughter became more overwhelming. I tossed a snowball at her—it shattered on the front of her jacket.
She was crying, she was laughing so hard. Reaching in front of her, she returned my volley with a snowball of her own.
“Hey!” I exclaimed. Fuck her smile was contagious. Everything about her was contagious. And I was fucking caught. “Did my dick hit your funny bone all the way up in there, J-bird?”
This time, she nodded and collapsed into the snow. I crawled over to her, planting my hands on either side of her face.
“Seriously, what’s wrong with you?”
She shook her head, finally stuttering, “Nothing.” Her chest rose and fell in erratic waves. “I think I almost died.”
I grinned. “I think you almost killed me.”
She let out a deep sigh, her breath dissolving into the cold air. “Guess I’ll have to try harder next time.”
“Fucking tease,” I growled, tempted to adjust the time frame on ‘next time.’
“So, are you going to call Channing and Wyatt, now? Now that you realize that you still belong here?”
I chuckled at my girl, always making sure that I wasn’t going to fall. But this time, I was one step ahead of the game.
“No.”
Her face fell—and I almost felt bad for playing this small joke on her. “Wh-What do—“
“Relax, J-bird,” I said as I cupped her face. “I’m not going to call them now because I called them this morning while you were in the lodge peeing.” Her eyes widened.
“What did you say?”
“What do you think I said?” I laughed. “I told them that I was going to do it. I told them that I would help teach and coach and whatever other BS they think I’m skilled enough to do.”
And then she smacked my arm—hard. “Why would you do that to me! I almost had a heart attack!”
I yanked her against my body because she was my missing piece.
“Why would you do that, though? Before we even came up here?”
My muscles tensed for a second before I spoke. “Because you believed in me. This whole time. You’ve poked me and pushed me—and provoked me—into healing the part of me that was broken—and I’m not talking about my knee. I turned them down because of my pride—because I couldn’t imagine being on this mountain and not being the best. But then you came along and reminded me about all of the good fucking things that happen when I give up being the best. You reminded me that my moments of greatest pride were when I gave my all for someone else.”
“Chance, I…” She shook her head. “You deserve this. And you are capable of it. And to me, you will always be the best—the king of the mountain. Not just because of how well you ride, but because of how well you take care of everyone else who comes here.”
I stood and extended my hand to her, hauling her up and against my chest.
“Thank you,” I whispered hoarsely.
“For what?” Her mouth parted, her face flushed with happiness.
“For believing in me.” My thumb brushed over her plump lower lip. “For telling me the truth. For always being the one to help me see past my pride.”
It happened so fast that I thought I might have imagined it—the shadow that passed over her face at my last words. The smile that followed quickly disguised whatever was lingering beneath the surface.
She couldn’t feel it through my layers, but my whole body tensed. It was that same feeling. The one I’d felt that night before I walked in on her fake-kissing Frost. The one where something is eating at her but she’s not telling me what it is. The one that I now know means something is going to come that will crush me.
It was the one that stopped the three little words that had been waiting patiently for eight years to come out.
“I think,” she began softly, “that you knew you could do this all along.” I raised an eyebrow at her assertion. “I think you were just trying to get back in my panties.”
It was an attempt to distract me. And it semi-worked. A smile broke on my face and I chuckled. I let myself taste her lips one more time, lingering on the sweet cotton-candy flavor that seemed perfectly matched to her hair.
“Not hard, J-bird, when you don’t wear any,” I rasped against her mouth, darting my tongue inside when her lips parted at my words. “Now, let’s go home. I don’t want that sweet ass of yours getting frostbite up here.” And then I leaned down next to her ear, “Because I plan on paying it a visit later.”
Unbridled desire flared in her eyes. Fucking fearless. That was my girl.
The Tower: A symbol of an experience that shakes the foundation of your current sense of security and forces you to question your strongly-held beliefs and perceptions—a loss that penetrates to the very core of your being.
With any destruction comes creation. Now that the Tower around you is broken, you are at rock bottom. The choice is yours where you go from here.
FOR SOME, THE MOUNTAIN IS a lifeline to the truest part of you, a reminder not to lose yourself in the mess that is life. To be strong and rise up.
As much as I loved the mountain and as much as I believed it was what had brought me back to Aspen, that afternoon I realized that what I believed was wrong.
Chance had brought me back here.
Chance was my mountain.
Hard, immovable. Standing proud amidst rain or shine or snow. Stable, yet always changing. All of his unforgiving peaks and angry edges that decorated what was strong and protective and undefeatable underneath.
“Chance…” I put my hand on his chest to stop him. Mistake. Every beat of his heart underneath my fingertips was one more link added to the chain that bound me to him.
“I need to talk to you…”
“J-bird, we can talk about the school later,” he growled as his hands cupped my face, continuing to plant kisses on every inch of skin that his lips could find, backing me farther into the house. Hats, gloves, scarves, jackets… our clothes littered the hallway like footprints in the snow. Gasping for air, his mouth took and took… and took… from mine. It had only been one day—but that was all it took. The mountain had brought Chance back to life and back to me.
And I didn’t want there to be anything left between us.
My heart raced faster than us flying down the slopes. My legs were wrapped around his waist, his arousal grinding into
my core as I ended up with my back against some wall in the house. My eyes squeezed shut. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. I could only feel him. Home. Wrapped around me like a vise.
I pushed again. “N-no. I need to talk to you about before.”
My legs slid to the floor so that I could step back, but all it did was give him the ability to start removing the layers between us. Shirts, snowpants, socks… couldn’t come off fast enough. And still I was burning up.
“I don’t care about fucking Frost or the kiss. I care about having you, J-bird. I care that now, you are mine.”
“No, that’s not—“ His lips cut me off again. I felt like I was being sedated—trying to grasp at reality that was quickly slipping from my grasp as desire flooded through my system.
We’d just made it down to the last layer of fabric when the banging on the front door shot through our desire like gunfire. Loudly. Incessantly. In perfectly timed clips. And with a complete disregard for casualties or common decency.
And that meant it could only be one person.
Frost.
“I’m going to kill that fucker,” Chance growled against my lips, his teeth sinking into my lower lip and sucking it hard into his mouth. “I’m going to kill him and then I’m going to fuck you.”
I pressed into the wall as Chance set me down on my feet far too quickly than my balance would have preferred. With an almost silent groan, my head fell back against the wall as I tried to reign in all my humming little cells that had been poised to be lit, flamed, and finally, smoked by Chance and every dirty thing I’d hoped he was going to do.
“What in the living—“ I heard Chance swear as the front door flew open, but his words then stopped short.
Was it not Frost? Was it someone else?
My eyes flew open, staring up at the lofted ceiling for a beat before I gave myself a quick once-over, hugged my arms around myself, and walked towards the hallway.
“Chance, what’s—“ It looked like he wasn’t the only one whose words were stolen from him.
I froze—harder, faster, and colder than if Queen Elsa herself had covered me with ice.
Enjoy the Ride (Winter Games Book 3) Page 30