After the Cure

by Deirdre Gould

Nella arrived at the prison early the next morning. The happiness of her friends still sat like a warm stone in her chest and she barely even noticed the clammy drizzle. She pulled into visitor parking and noticed Mr. Courtlen arguing with a short, portly, middle aged man. Nella got out of the car but paused in the open doorway when she heard their raised voices.

  "Your client is a monster Frank!" shouted the older man, "He locked her in a room full of infected animals and abandoned her for months."

  "She was already infected! What should he have done?" Mr. Courtlen's long arms were stretched toward the other man, almost pleading.

  "I can't believe you are going to blame this all on Ann. She was an overworked, practically abused intern that was then exposed to a vile plague that your client cooked up." The fat little man was jabbing a finger toward Mr. Courtlen's face. "And you have the gall to try to weasel out of this by pointing to her?"

  "No, that's not what-"

  "Listen Frank," the little man talked over Mr. Courtlen, "I know you are court appointed to defend Robert Pazzo but how could you live with yourself if you destroy an innocent person? She's already incapable of ever leading a normal life because of what your client did. If you make a deal with the prosecutors claiming that Ann was responsible, she'll be completely at the mercy of the court. She can't even coherently defend herself. Can you live with yourself knowing that?" The little man walked a step past Mr. Courtlen.

  "But we're not-"

  The lawyer spun around and interrupted him again. "Oh, that's right. I forgot who I was dealing with. You're already comfortable destroying a defenseless woman." The little man sneered and Nella thought Mr. Courtlen would hit him. But Frank's shoulders sagged and he leaned his back against his car as if he were the one who had been punched. She watched the older lawyer trot into the prison and though she didn't even know his name and she knew she was supposed to be a neutral party, in that moment Nella truly hated the nasty, strident little man.

  She was utterly still, not knowing whether to pretend she had seen nothing or check to see if Frank were okay. He put a hand to his forehead but didn't move. Nella closed her car door and watched him start. He hadn't even seen her drive in. He turned around and his face was dark red. The ragged scar on his cheek pulsed purple. Nella thought he was angry but he managed a small, tight smile and she realized he was only surprised and embarrassed.

  "Good morning, Dr. Rider," he said, and his voice was smooth and calm.

  "Are you okay?" she asked, circling her car towards him. He rubbed the back of his neck and his smile loosened and grew.

  "I'm fine. It's not like I've never been called a monster before. I've even called myself worse on occasion. Mr. Grant just doesn't understand that we're not practicing law from Before. He wants things to work the same as they used to. He thinks that the world just has this out of order sign temporarily tacked to it. Any minute a maintenance guy is going to come along and plug the world back in and everything will go back to what it was."

  Nella sighed. "I doubt he's the only one that thinks that."

  "He can't believe that this trial is about anything other than getting his client released. He thinks that's my goal too. Mr. Grant is expecting me to make some kind of deal with the prosecution by sacrificing Ann Connelly in return for a lighter sentence for Dr. Pazzo."

  Mr. Courtlen walked to his trunk and waved his keys as he talked. "I'm not stupid," he said, "I know my client is never going to walk out of here. Hell, I probably won't even be able to stall his execution. But that was never the point of all this."

  Nella heard Sevita's words echo in her head as he disappeared behind the opening trunk lid.

  "What is your goal Mr. Courtlen?" she asked.

  He slammed the trunk. "Well, it's to help my client to have his say and to find out about what really happened. Dr. Pazzo has promised to tell the world the truth. So I have promised to defend him as well as I could. We both understand that he is not likely to escape this."

  "And you believe him?" Nella kept her voice neutral.

  Frank opened a black umbrella and walked up to her. "Please," he said, holding it out for her, "It's cold out here."

  Instead of reaching for it, Nella stepped underneath the umbrella with him. He smelled almost impossibly clean, like fresh shaving foam and wind dried linen. Nella was dismayed to realize that she had expected him to smell like the other Infected she had met during the Cure. They had been putrid and coppery with rotten meat and dried blood. She tried to put the memory from her head and scolded herself for her prejudice.

  "Yes, I believe he's going to tell the truth," continued Frank, "I also believe he's guilty of at least helping to start this whole thing, because he admits it, as you will see. But everyone deserves to say their piece. Mr. Grant has this delusion that because I was Infected I have some affinity for Robert Pazzo. But I have more reason to hate my client than many." He watched her face as he spoke, "The things I've done, what I have lost- what we all have lost because of this terrible plague. How could I be his friend?"

  He shook his head as if to clear it. "I'm sorry. It's cold and wet and I've kept you here complaining about unimportant things." He touched her elbow and this time she didn't shudder. "We should go in," he said.

  "I think it is important," replied Nella as they walked toward the prison, "How can you defend him if you are convinced he is guilty?"

  Mr. Courtlen laughed. "I'm hardly the first lawyer to ever believe his client is guilty."

  "No, I suppose not. But if you hold him responsible for all of your loss-"

  "Who is left in the world who doesn't hold him responsible for their losses? Besides, it's far, far more complicated than it seems. I believe he plans to start telling you the story today."

  They reached the heavy glass door and Nella held it open for him as he shook the chill out of the umbrella.

  "We didn't expect you this early though," he said.

  "I was told that this was the best time to speak with Miss Connelly's council." Nella felt guilty saying it, but pushed the feeling aside.

  "Ah, I see," said Mr. Courtlen with a small smile, "Well, I'll see you later this morning then."

  "Will ten o'clock be alright?"

  "I think that will be fine. I'll see you then, Dr. Rider."

  And because he still seemed shrunken somehow, still red with embarrassment, she added, "I look forward to it."

  His smile warmed and he stood a little straighter. Nella walked down the hall to the metal detector without looking back at him.

  The Teeth Must Gnash