Lullabye (Rockstar #6)

by Anne Mercier

  “I can’t come up with a joke,” he replies, his eyes shiny. “My dad saved our girl.”

  I don’t bother trying to correct him. He’s right. She is our girl… she’s everyone’s of our girl. Every single one of us.

  “He did. And damn, Lucy’s tough. Those babies she was carrying? They weighed nearly thirteen pounds,” I tell them, hearing ‘holy shit’ more than once.

  “Oh my,” Regina begins. “Are the babies okay?”

  I nod. “They’re in the NICU. The nurse came down to tell me how they were doing. As soon as I’m done here, I’m heading up.”

  “Well?” Meggie asks.

  I chuckle. “You’re not going to believe this.”

  Sera laughs. “Oh, sure we will. It’s you and Lucy, isn’t it?”

  “True, true.” I nod. “The first boy—”

  Regina gasps. “A boy!”

  “He weighed three pounds two ounces. Baby boy number two, weighed three pounds four ounces,” I relay, ignoring the murmurs. “Baby boy number three weighed in at three pounds six ounces.”

  “Wow, man,” Ben begins. “Three boys.”

  I nod.

  “Guess my mom was wrong,” Sera says with a frown.

  “Hold up,” Kennedy says.

  I look over at him with a smirk. I knew it’d be him.

  “You said the babies weighed nearly thirteen pounds. That’s only nine pounds twelve ounces,” he tells me with a frown.

  “Yeah, yeah it is.”

  “What the fuck?” Trace asks.

  “Well, you see, we had a bit of a surprise. A good surprise,” I reassure them when they all start to panic. “Seems we had another baby in there that was hidden.”

  “Get the fuck out!” Sera shouts.

  “Serafina!” Regina scolds.

  “Oh, come on mama, you know you’re thinking the same thing.”

  Regina nods. “Maybe. Go on, Jesse.”

  “Imagine our surprise—imagine Xan’s dad’s surprise when there was a little baby girl in there who’d been surrounded by and protected by her brothers,” I say, a tear running down my cheek.

  “Already protecting her,” Xan mutters. “Those are going to be some good boys.”

  I nod. “She weighed three pounds one ounce and she’s got the biggest set of lungs of the lot.”

  Sera laughs through her tears. “I can’t believe it. Four babies.”

  “The Kingston Quads,” Ethan announces.

  Everyone begins talking and congratulating me and while I’m happy, I can’t forget the look of Lucy lying there. I’ve seen it too many times already. I don’t want to see it again. Ever.

  “She’s all right, man,” Ben tells me, clamping a hand on my shoulder.

  “She is now. It was touch and go, Ben. Like real close,” I tell him quietly.

  “Holy fuck,” he says and pulls me in for a hug. Now, we’re not normally touchy-feely brothers, but right now I need this hug so I let him. I hug him back and bite back all the tears that I’ve wanted to cry for the last however many hours. “She’s good, bro.”

  I nod and pull back. “Yeah, she is.”

  “Let’s go take a look at our babies,” Xander announces and I groan.

  “No teaching them bad things,” Meggie scolds.

  Xander scoffs. “Please. Someone has to do it.”

  “And you’ll take all kinds of pride in it, won’t you, Xan?” she asks.

  He nods, head bobbing up and down. “Damn straight. I’m gonna be the cool uncle. Uncle Xan Man.” His chest puffs up with pride and I grin.

  “I’ll teach them how to work a computer like no one else ever could,” Kennedy declares.

  “Hell yeah,” Ben agrees. “I’ll teach ‘em how to play the hell out of a guitar.”

  Ethan nods. “I’ll teach ‘em how to clean up after themselves so Mama Lucy doesn’t get all pissed off.”

  Everyone chuckles, Xan shudders. “Cranky Mama Lucy won’t be fun.”

  “Hell no, she won’t,” Trace agrees.

  “So no pissing her off,” Jace instructs Xan.

  “Dude, I don’t piss her off. I’m her Xan Man. She loves me.”

  “She loves us all,” Jace mutters.

  “A heart of gold,” Carlotta tells us. “Lucy’s got a heart of gold.”

  “That she does,” Giovanni agrees.

  When we step off the elevator, we head toward the NICU. We approach the glass window and look around for the babies.

  “There!” Meggie points.

  “Oh, look, Anthony,” Regina exclaims, tears littering her voice.

  “They’re beautiful, Jesse,” Lucy’s dad tells me with a pat on the back.

  I can only nod. There’s a lump in my throat the size of the Grand Canyon and I know if I give in, I’m done. I’ll wait until I’m alone to have my breakdown. I don’t need my kids seeing me for the first time mid-mental breakdown.

  “She’s so tiny,” Xander mutters.

  “Yeah, they all are,” Jace agrees.

  “What’s that gunk in their eyes?” Xan asks.

  I shrug. “I dunno.”

  “Antibiotic ointment,” Kennedy informs us and we all turn to look at him.

  He shrugs. “What? Lucy’s not the only one who read the baby books.”

  I grin. “Of course she’s not.”

  “Dude, you know how nerd boy is,” Xan teases.

  “Like you didn’t read them,” Kennedy mocks.

  Xan nods. “I gotta know how to take care of our kids.”

  “You gonna change diapers?” Cage asks.

  Xan nods. “Sure am. I’m not above cleaning up shit pants.”

  “Then I know who to pass the baby to when they do their business,” Jace states.

  “Change your own shit pants, man. It’ll do you some good,” Xan counters.

  “Yeah,” Ethan agrees. “It’ll build character.”

  “Whatever,” Jace mutters. “I’ll do whatever they need me to. Look at them.”

  “They’re sleeping,” Trace says, stating the obvious.

  Jace gives him a look. “But they’re here. Living, breathing mini-Jesses and a mini-Lucy.”

  Everyone’s quiet after that. We just stand there for the longest time before Anthony breaks the silence.

  “Have you two thought of names?”

  “Nope. We decided we were going to wait until we saw them and go with what felt right,” I reply.

  “Good plan,” Xan assures me.

  “Thanks for your approval.”

  He nods. “You’re welcome.”

  I chuckle. The fucker.

  “I want to hold one,” Xan says.

  “Can’t just yet,” I tell him. “Hopefully soon. Whenever they’ve run all the tests they need to.”

  “I’m just glad they don’t have to be on ventilators,” Meggie mutters softly.

  “Our brood?” Xan asks. “Pffft. We’re as tough as they come.”

  I think to Lucy, all the blood filling her abdomen, her blood pressure dropping—and her fighting back. “They’re just like their mama.”

  “WE NEED TO talk, old man,” I say to my gampy.

  “You will watch your tone, young lady,” Nana scolds.

  “Yes, Nana. But do you know what he did?” I ask.

  She gives me a wry grin. “I always know what he does. I don’t always approve, but I know.”

  “This time it was too much. Keeping that from us, the ones who were right there doing the protecting,” I say angrily as I pace in front of the vending machine.

  “Serafina,” gampy begins and I shake my head. “I did what was best.”

  “You can’t decide what’s best for Jesse’s sister!” I hiss. “That’s for him and Ben to decide.”

  “It might be, but would they be rational?” he asks.

  “Did you see their parents? Did you see how they dealt with them? Very rational,” I remind him.

  “True enough. I can’t change what’s already done,” he says. There’s
a tick in Cage’s jaw and I know he’s pissed. “Say what you want to say, Cage. You’ve already spoke your mind on the matter, but let your wife hear this time.”

  I turn to Cage in surprise. “You spoke to him about this already?”

  Cage nods. “There are rules and the first one between the Boss and second in command is: no secrets and no lies. When that rule was broken, I was ready to walk away from all of this. How will I know he’s got my back if I can’t trust him?”

  I walk over to him and hug his side. He wraps an arm around me.

  “I didn’t want it leaked out, Serafina. There are moles,” gampy tells me.

  “What?”

  He nods. “We need to be very careful until we can smoke them out of their holes. I trusted no one on that tour.”

  “How the hell do they keep getting in?” I ask, frustrated.

  “That’s what we intend to find out,” Cage murmurs.

  “What about Jana?” I whisper.

  “All I know is she’s alive. I don’t know if she’s been—injured,” gampy explains, his expression impassive as always.

  “We need to tell them,” I remark. “I am not going to keep this kind of a secret from Jesse, Lucy, and Ben. I can’t and I won’t.”

  “Serafina. It is part of the business. This is how things are done,” gampy states. He’s so matter-of-fact about it, it pisses me off.

  “You know what, gampy? You can keep your business. I don’t want a part of this at the cost of my sister, her husband, and brother-in-law. You know better than to do this to Lucy—again. I just can’t and I won’t apologize for it.”

  He nods once. “I wouldn’t expect you to.”

  “You say this is business, but this ‘business’ isn’t just business right now. It’s family and I don’t want to jeopardize that. And when they aren’t informed, they’re at risk. Think about this, gampy.”

  He just looks at me as Nana looks on silently. Cage still has the tick in his jaw and I can’t blame him. I think if we were anywhere but here, he’d have plenty to say. I wonder what he said to gampy already. I bet he went all Batman on him. I smirk at the thought then pout a little. I missed it. I missed my sexy husband going all alpha male.

  “Gio,” Cage says and I perk up. Maybe I’ll get some alpha Batman hotness right now. “She’s right.”

  That’s it. That’s all he said, but the way he said it, and the look on his face when he said it has me all hot and bothered. Sheesh. I’m so easy.

  “Of course I’m right,” I mock with a roll of my eyes. That gets me a twitch of his lips. Blink and you’d miss it, but I never miss it. I know what to look for and I love that it’s just me and him, sharing secrets, being best friends and lovers.

  “Giovanni,” Nana scolds.

  Holy smokes.

  “You know she’s right. Upsetting Luciana is a mistake. Keeping this from her and those men.” She shakes her head. “It’s foolish and will cause a very big ripple of discord in the family. I don’t ever tell you what to do when it comes to your business, but this is family. This is our Luciana and her family—our family. You need to do what’s right,” she advises.

  Rock on, Nana! Mental fist pump action going on here. Hell, I’m starting to sound like Xander—except he’d be doing that out loud. I snort and Cage looks over. I just shake my head and there’s that twitch again. I lick my lips and his eyes follow the movement of my tongue. When his gaze lifts to mine, I smirk and give him a wink. His eyes dance with amusement and I wiggle my eyebrows.

  “Yes. All right. As soon as Luciana is well enough, I’ll talk to her. I will speak to both Jesse and Ben in a few minutes. I will arrange to have a private space,” gampy tells us.

  “Good idea. I have a feeling there are going to be some Kingston men going ape shit here shortly,” I mutter and Nana nods. See? She gets it. It’s got to be a man thing that they don’t think about feelings—although, Cage did think of that. Maybe gampy is just too set in his ways to think of such things but, damn, this isn’t something to mess around with. I pause when I get a thought that gives me chills. I hope my Batman never gets that used to “business” that he forgets to feel. I won’t let him. I’ve taught him how to feel again, how to laugh, and how to be happy just as he taught me. We’ll just have to remind each other what’s at stake when feelings are put in second place to business.

  I’ve decided not to speak during this meeting unless it’s necessary—and I have a feeling it’s going to be. Nana didn’t come and I almost wish she had. She’s got that way about her that gets people to listen to reason.

  “Gentlemen, have a seat,” gampy offers.

  “No, thanks. I’ll stand,” Jesse tells him. “If you’ve called us in here to talk in private, I know it’s not going to be good.”

  Ben stands impassively next to his brother. His eyes skirt over to me and I press my lips together. He visibly tenses, bracing himself for what’s to come. My Benny. Maybe I could have loved him if I’d met him first—or never met Cage. No. I couldn’t have. That passion isn’t there. He’s a great best friend, though.

  “All right. I’ll just cut to the chase,” gampy begins.

  “I’d prefer it,” Ben tells him, getting a nod in return.

  “You’re aware we have many enemies.”

  Both Ben and Jesse nod.

  “Some of those enemies have taken your sister, Jana,” gampy tells them, straight up.

  “What?” Ben asks.

  “What the fuck? When? How? She had guards,” Jesse growls.

  “She did, that’s true. She went off on her own, purposefully losing those guards. We found out she’d been seeing one of the Manzini sons.”

  Jesse lets out a string of expletives that’d do a sailor proud.

  “She wouldn’t go with him if she’d known,” Ben reasons.

  “No, I’m sure not. I’m also sure he used an alias to get close to her, charmed her, and when he learned enough about the guards and her protection, he took her,” gampy tells him.

  I clench my fists and unclench them. I hate the Manzinis.

  “Is she alive?” Jesse asks flatly.

  Cage steps closer. “We’re not sure.”

  “Give it to us straight, man,” Ben asks, his eyes pleading for something other than what we know to be the truth.

  “We’re honestly not sure. Last we heard she was alive. Any other time they’ve kidnapped someone, the person would already be dead,” Cage informs them.

  “Christ,” Jesse bites out. He paces the floor then looks to Cage. “What do we do?”

  I stand up and walk over to them. “We wait, we hope, and we pray.”

  “Not that it’ll do us much good,” Ben snaps. “You fuckers and your mafia bullshit.”

  “Ben,” Jesse mutters softly.

  “No, fuck that.” He steps forward toward my gampy and I hold my breath. This isn’t the smartest thing Ben’s ever done. “You know this is bullshit. How do we get her back? Do we know what they’ve done to her? Motherfucker!” he shouts, grabbing the back of a chair and holding it so tightly his knuckles are white. “She’s going to be so fucked up if she gets out of this alive.” He looks to Cage. “Right?”

  Cage doesn’t miss a beat. “Yes.”

  And just like that Ben crumbles. He falls into the chair, his head hanging. “If we save her, we won’t really be saving her. I know what they’re doing to her—torturing her for information, raping her to let her know who’s in charge.” He blows out a breath and looks up at me with imploring eyes. “What do we do, Sera? Do we even want to save her from that? What kind of life will she have? She’ll be broken.”

  I walk over and stand in front of him, pulling him forward and hugging him, his arms wrapping around my waist, his head resting on my chest.

  “We don’t know anything yet, Ben.”

  “But you know what they do, what they’re probably doing,” Jesse states.

  I nod. “I do.”

  “Straight up, Sera. Give it to me straight up
,” Jesse pleads.

  I sigh. I hate having to be the one. “If I were to guess, I’d say she met the guy at college. He likely did the whole doting-boyfriend thing, charmed his way into her pants, then got her to trust him. The minute she let her guard down and let him in, he pounced, taking her back to the Manzinis.”

  “And then?”

  “Jesse,” I say softly.

  “And then? What would you do? If it was you, what would you do?” he seethes, and in this moment I’m so afraid he is going to hate me for who I am and what I do.

  “And then we’d tie her up and if she was loud or wouldn’t shut up, we’d gag her. We’d make her wait, walking past her with our weapons, intimidating her, making her fear us even more. Then we’d interrogate her by whatever means necessary. We don’t rape as a means of torture, so I don’t know about that at all, but it’s pretty self-explanatory.”

  “And the Manzinis are known for that?” Ben asks.

  I nod. “Yes.” I look over to Cage, whose eyes soften when they meet mine, his mouth and jaw hard and set in an angry line. “They may or may not rape her. They will torture her, finding her weaknesses if they haven’t already.”

  “She doesn’t know anything,” Jesse says, stating the obvious.

  “I know. Likely they do as well,” I admit.

  “Then what the fuck?” he roars. “Why?”

  I meet his gaze and hate my answer. “Because they can.”

  He blows out a breath, then lets out an anguished growl before falling to his knees, his head hanging much the way Ben’s was. I go to him, dropping to my knees in front of him, holding him as he breaks down.

  His body shakes—hard, and I know there’s more to this than what’s happening now. How long has he been holding this in? I soothe him with a gentle hand rubbing his back, soft senseless words and sounds. Ben walks over, standing behind his brother, looking on in confusion. I just shake my head. Let him get it all out. He needs to purge this anguish.

  When he calms down a bit, I hug him tighter and whisper in his ear, “I will do everything I can to get her back.”