Lullabye (Rockstar #6)

by Anne Mercier

  “I think that’s a really great decision. But, knowing you and Jesse, you’re likely to have a ‘surprise’ with the way you go at it,” she teases.

  Lucy blushes and I chuckle. “It’ll be fine.”

  Coley nods.

  “Besides,” Lucy states, “Sera or Meggie can bring me new babies to play with.”

  “Hell no!” Meggie says.

  “You don’t want kids?” Lucy asks.

  “Not right now, I don’t. Maybe later.”

  I watch as Trace visibly shudders and shuts down. That’s not going to be good.

  Meggie points at Sera. “Her, look at her!”

  Sera looks up at Cage, then back at us and shakes her head. “We’re not ready just yet.”

  “Understandable,” Giovanni affirms. “But I expect Nichols babies at some point.”

  Sera rolls her eyes. “Get in line, Gampy. Mama and Nana beat you to that one. They’ve been on me from the minute we walked into the hospital.”

  Lucy snickers and Sera gives her a glare.

  Everyone starts to talk amongst themselves and Xan makes his way over, pulling up a chair next to the bed.

  “How ya doin’, Luce my goose?”

  “Better by the minute, Xan my man.”

  “Good, good,” he says with a nod, head bobbing up and down.

  “What is it?” Lucy asks.

  Xan keeps his head lowered but lifts his eyes to Lucy’s. “I was so afraid, Luce. You’re my best friend.”

  “Hello. Remember me?” I say.

  Xan smirks. “Always so dramatic,” he teases.

  I flip him off.

  “For real, Luce. I was so fucking scared. The nurses wouldn’t tell us shit. Only that there had been some complications and it was taking longer than they expected. Then Jesse came out, pale as a ghost, his whole body shaking and I knew. I just knew it was bad,” he murmurs, then takes Lucy’s hand and lifts it to his lips. I bite back a growl. I’ll give him this one.

  “I’m sorry, Xan,” Lucy tells him, bringing their joined hands to her chest.

  “Promise to never leave,” he pleads, saying all the things I wanted to but held back.

  “If I could promise you that, I would. But you know that’s not how things work.”

  He nods.

  “I can promise to do my best?” she questions.

  “That’ll do,” he replies with a wink.

  “I wanted to ask you something Xan,” Lucy begins.

  “Should I go?” I ask.

  “No, no. It’s fine.”

  “Okay.”

  “What’s on your mind, Luce?” Xan asks.

  “Where’d you go those two days in New York?”

  A wall of sadness blankets him at the question and I know exactly where he went.

  “I went to see Tera.”

  Lucy gasps softly. “What?”

  “There’s so much you don’t know, Lucy, and I promise one day I’ll tell you—just not yet, okay? I have to work some shit out.”

  “Okay, okay,” Lucy agrees. “Can I ask—what is she to you?”

  One side of his mouth kicks up in a grin. “She is to me what Jesse is to you.”

  “Oh, wow. I had a feeling that’s what you were going to say. She’s your ‘one’.”

  He looks up at Lucy. “Yeah. There are just some things standing in our way right now that we’re both trying to get through—mostly Tera. I don’t want you to not like her because she’s not here and I’m sad, Luce. I saw that look on the bus that day. She’s got her reasons and they’re valid. I promise you.”

  Lucy meets his gaze head on. “Okay. I just don’t like to see you hurting. It hurts my heart.”

  “I know. I’m all right. Trust me, okay?” he asks.

  She kisses his hand she’s still holding to her chest. “I do.”

  “Good,” he replies.

  Sitting here, watching them interact, seeing their closeness, I know that if anything were to ever happen to me, he’d take care of Lucy—Tera or no Tera.

  “I need to pee,” Lucy announces, reaching for the ‘call’ button.

  The nurse hurries in and helps Luce to the bathroom.

  I look at Xan. “You’re in love with my wife.”

  He has the grace to look sheepish. “If she were my wife, wouldn’t you be?”

  “Yeah, yeah I would.”

  “You pissed?”

  “Nope. I trust you both and I know you,” I tell him.

  Xan nods. “I told you before we started on the tour that if you fucked up and she dumped you, I was going to make my move, but you totally manned up. I wouldn’t ever try to break what you both have worked so hard to make together.”

  I look at him and hate to admit this. “She’s in love with you, too.”

  He smirks. “Not the way she loves you, dude. Not even close.”

  “That how it is with Tera?”

  He nods. “Always has been. Always will be.”

  “Then do what you gotta do, man. Make it happen,” I advise.

  “We’re both working on it.”

  “Good. If you need anything, just say the word.”

  “Thanks.”

  I nod.

  “Why is it we have this same conversation whenever we’re in the hospital?” he asks with a grin.

  I shrug. “I’m not sure. Maybe because it’s easier to see.”

  “Maybe.”

  “Oh, that felt so good!” Lucy tells us as the nurse helps her back into bed.

  I can’t help but laugh.

  “What? It did,” she defends.

  “Sometimes after birth women have a hard time knowing when their bladder is full,” the nurse informs us.

  “I had to pee in this bowl thing so they can measure my urine, right?” she begins. Xan and I nod, smirks in place. “I overflowed it!”

  “Nuh-uh,” Xan scoffs.

  “Uh-huh,” Lucy defends. “Just ask her,” she says, pointing to the nurse.

  “It’s true. Mrs. Kingston did, indeed, overflow the measuring unit.”

  “I’m just glad I didn’t pee the bed,” Lucy states.

  “We’ve been over this,” Meggie cuts in. “It’s Jace that pees the bed.”

  “What the fuck?” Jace interrupts.

  “Jace Warner. Language!” Mama scolds.

  “Sorry, mama,” he says, “but what the fuck?”

  Mama just gives him the eye.

  “Jacey pee pants,” Sera sing-songs.

  “You better watch yourself—rabbit,” he tells her and she clamps her lips together.

  “Rabbit?” Xan asks. “Like thumper? Or humper?”

  “Never mind,” Sera huffs, walking away.

  “No way! I want to know about this ‘rabbit’ stuff,” he provokes and Sera gives him a glare. “I’m not afraid of you Serafina. You’d never hurt me. You love me too much.”

  “Don’t tempt me.”

  “Then again, I might like it if you hurt me,” he taunts and Cage clears his throat. Xan’s grin drops. “Shit. Sorry, Cage dude. You know I’m just joking. Right?”

  Cage doesn’t answer and Meggie snickers. “Keep glaring at him like that, Cage. Maybe we’ll have two ‘pee pants’.”

  Cage’s lips twitch and Jace mutters something under his breath.

  “No lie. That look, that one right there,” Xan begins. “I think I felt a dribble.”

  Cage walks over to Sera, pulling her into his side. “Then don’t flirt with my wife.”

  Sera grins and laughs while Xan eyes Cage warily, unsure if he poked the lion or if he’s just playing.

  Cage leans in and kisses Sera.

  He’ll never know.

  Three weeks later…

  THERE’S A BABY crying and I sit up in bed with my eyes still closed. We set up Jesse’s entertainment area for the babies so they’re close by. We also knocked out the wall between the rooms so Jesse wouldn’t sleep on the floor next to the cribs.

  “There’s my early riser,” I coo to
Konnor. He always wakes first. I think he’s just afraid he’s going to miss something. I’m changing his diaper when Killian begins to whimper. Jesse’s over in a flash, getting him changed, and just as I get Konnor settled into his baby swing, Kaid starts up. It’s a routine, and I’m so damn glad I decided not to breastfeed. I don’t think I’d be able to produce enough to feed these oinkers.

  Jesse sets Killian in his swing, then goes over to Keirah’s crib, even though she’s not crying.

  “God damn it,” Jesse mutters.

  “Again?” I ask.

  Jesse nods.

  “I’ll go get her,” I tell him, and arrange Kaid in his swing. Jesse sets off to heat up the bottles while Mrs. Martinez watches the babies. The woman is in her glory having these babies around.

  I put my robe on and make my way through the house. I should have put my slippers on, the floor’s really cold on my feet. I can hear him talking and I grin, slowly opening the door.

  “The princess was the most beautiful thing the prince had ever seen. He walked right up to her and spoke to her. He was a prince after all, and princes aren’t afraid of anything. But the princess didn’t want to talk. She just wanted to look at the rippling water. So the prince sat down next to her and they watched it together.”

  I lean against the doorjamb. “Xander.”

  He looks over with a smile from where he’s sitting on his sofa, feet propped up on the coffee table, little Kierah resting on his thighs while she sucks furiously on the bottle of formula Xander’s holding to her mouth.

  “What?” he asks. “She was hungry.”

  “You can’t keep taking her. It’ll mess with our routine,” I tell him.

  “Why can’t I keep her? You won’t miss one, right? You weren’t even counting on having four, so why not just give me one to take care of. Uncle Xan Man is awesome, right little Kierah?” he asks, his grin a mile wide as he looks down on my little girl.

  I laugh at his suggestion. “You can’t keep her, Xander.”

  “Why not? Really, think about it. It’s one less poop pants to change. One less burp to try to extract. One less bottle to feed,” he pleads as he lifts Kierah to his shoulder, over the burp rag. I raise a brow at that. Then he burps her as if he’s been doing it for months instead of days. I can’t help but gape.

  He wiggles his eyebrows and grins that Xander grin.

  “What’s going on here, Xan?” I ask, more than a little shocked at what I’m seeing.

  He shrugs, then puts a now-sleeping Kierah into a crib. Wait—a crib?

  I get up, following him, mouth hanging open. “Is that a crib?”

  “Well, yeah. Where else are the babies going to sleep when they come visit Uncle Xan?” he asks, as if it’s the stupidest question in the world.

  My mouth opens and closes more than once and I back up slowly, feeling behind me for the sofa, sitting on it when I get there.

  “Well then,” I mutter.

  “What’s the big deal, Luce? I just want to help take care of the kids.” He says it so matter-of-factly that it sounds like it’s just a normal everyday occurrence.

  “I get that. I do. But you keep sneaking them away.”

  “I don’t sneak,” he defends.

  “You sneak. The last three days there’s been a baby missing.”

  “Trying to help,” he defends.

  I bite my bottom lip. “Xander. I can’t give you one of the babies.”

  He pouts playfully. “You can let me borrow them. Take care of them. I mean, with four of them, aren’t you going to be grateful to get rid of one for a short period of time?”

  “If I say ‘yes’ I’m a bad mother. If I say ‘no’ I’m an idiot.”

  “What’s going on in here?” Jesse asks from where he’s leaning against the doorjamb. He looks like he’s been there awhile.

  “Uh, Xan wants to help with the babies.”

  “And what did you say?” he asks.

  “I didn’t know what to say. Jesse, he’s got a crib set up. He’s got diapers. He burped Kierah better than I do!” I tell him, not hiding the surprise.

  “What the fuck, man? Where’d you get a crib?” Jesse asks.

  “First, you owe the swear jar. Baby present. Second, the baby store. There are so many baby stores you just don’t know where to begin. And when you get inside? All the stuff they have?” He walks over to a closet door and opens it, where it’s loaded with—stuff. Bottles, burp rags, diapers, clothes, rattles.

  “What the…” I trail off.

  Kennedy strolls in, following as Jesse walks over.

  “They’re not just your babies,” Xander explains. “They’re all of ours, you know?”

  Jesse just stares.

  “He’s right,” Kennedy agrees.

  “What?” I ask.

  “He’s right. They may biologically be your kids, but we’re all going to look at them as if they’re ours too. How can we not, man?” he asks Jesse.

  “Well, hell,” Jesse mutters.

  I blow out a breath. Oh boy. “We’re going to have to set some rules.” All three men look at me. “They aren’t so important now, but they will be when they get older. I mean, imagine if we woke up and one or more of the kids weren’t in their crib. They could have crawled out of it and we would think they were with you.”

  Xan nods. “I can get on board with that.”

  “Are you going to keep taking my baby girl?” I ask.

  “Maybe,” is all he says. “When she gets older she needs to know someone’s there—besides her parents—to protect her from her bully brothers. You know they’re going to be bullies. They’re freaking Kingstons!” Xan declares.

  I lean back on the sofa. “And here I was worried I’d have too many babies and not enough hands.”

  “What are you going to tell the chicks you bring back here to bang?” Kennedy asks.

  “Dude. I won’t be bringing them here,” Xander says with disgust.

  “Dude,” Kennedy replies.

  Xan shakes his head. “No way am I exposing our kids to that.”

  “So, what?” Jesse asks. “You’re just never going to get laid again?”

  “Dude, watch what you say around the babies,” Xan scolds and I snicker. “And hell yeah I will. Just not here.”

  “New York’s a long way for a bootie call,” I say softly.

  “Then it’s a real good thing it’s a whole hell of a lot more than that.”

  “DID YOU HEAR anything?” Sera asks again. She asks every day and every day I have to tell her no.

  I shake my head. “Nothing.”

  “This is weighing so heavily on Jesse and Ben—and you.”

  It is. Very heavily. This shouldn’t have happened. She was supposed to be under our protection and whether or not she took off, we were supposed to keep her safe. But we didn’t.

  “How’s Jeni?” Twins. I imagine it’s much more difficult for her. I don’t know if it’s true that twins can sense things about one another or not, but so far Jeni hasn’t said anything about it.

  “She’s okay. She stays in mostly. She was a homebody before, but now she’s too scared to leave the house,” Sera says, walking up to me and kissing my neck. “Maybe that’s a good thing.”

  “Maybe it is,” I agree, pulling her in close, leaning down to kiss my wife’s lips. My want for her never eases. It only increases each time I touch her.

  I push the breakfast dishes aside on the window seat and pull Sera onto my lap. When I reach up to remove my glasses, she stops me.

  “Leave them on,” she tells me, her voice husky with arousal.

  “We don’t have much time,” I murmur between kisses on her neck.

  “Long enough,” she replies, taking my cock out of my pajama bottoms. I groan when her fingers wrap around my length, gripping me tight as she begins to stroke me.

  I reach between her legs and dip my finger underneath her panties and into her warmth. “So wet.”

  “Mmm,” she moans, her head fa
lling back, exposing her throat to me. Invitation accepted.

  I kiss up and down her neck and push a second finger inside her pussy.

  She’s so good at stroking my cock—too good.

  “Enough of that,” I tell her, moving her panties to the side and pulling her down onto my dick.

  “Oh, yes,” she moans and it sets me on fire.

  I lift and lower her hips, feeling her pussy hot and wet surrounding me, her lips on mine—everything about her a part of me and me a part of her.

  “Fee,” I whisper against her.

  “Batman,” she whispers back and I let out a laugh.

  “Really?” I ask. “Now?”

  “The glasses are your disguise,” she moans out as I push hard up into her.

  “Fee, my love, that’s Superman.”

  “Superman, Batman, it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that it’s you—my Cage,” she whispers, her breathing heavy.

  “Then fuck me like it’s our last time.”

  Her gaze snaps to mine, confusion evident.

  “I just… need you. Desperately,” I confess.

  She nods and slams her mouth onto mine, her tongue brushing against mine, the tempo swift and passionate, matching the rhythm of her hips and I groan. Oh yeah. Just like that. This is what I need. I need to know she wants me as much as I want her. I need to know she loves me as much as I love her. I need to know she needs me as much as I need her.

  “Cage,” she whispers, her body quivering.

  “Close, so close, my Fee.”

  My phone rings. She looks at me and I look at her, then to my phone. Giovanni. The man has the worst timing.

  “Nichols.”

  “I need you and Serafina to come to the warehouse.”

  Sera starts moving on my dick again and I nearly groan. As it is, I’m trying to regulate my breathing.

  “Fine.”

  She leans in and licks my neck. Fuck.

  “One hour.”

  When he hangs up, I drop my phone and flip Sera onto her back, pulling her hips to the edge of the window seat.

  “Hold on.”

  She lifts her hands to brace herself and I slam into her.

  “You were naughty just then,” I say between thrusts.

  “You like me naughty.” She grins.

  I lift her leg, her knee hooking over my shoulder.

  “Oh God, yes. Harder,” she pleads and I oblige.