A Life Apart: A Darcy and Elizabeth Pride and Prejudice Variation

by Harriet Knowles

  She raised her voice. “Jane! Jane, dear, Lizzy is here!”

  Elizabeth was watching for Jane to appear, but she did see the slightly apprehensive glance that Aunt Gardiner cast at William.

  He bowed at her aunt. “Good morning, Mrs. Gardiner. I am happy that you are at home to receive Elizabeth this morning.”

  But Elizabeth slipped her hand from his arm when she saw Jane hesitate in the doorway, and ran to her.

  “Jane!” It seemed perfectly right to embrace her and the sisters hugged each other tightly. “Oh, Jane! I am so sorry I didn’t write back to you. I was so angry and then it was so long and it got harder and harder.”

  Jane drew back a little. “Lizzy, it is all forgotten and we are together again. Oh, I am so pleased to see you looking so well.”

  Elizabeth looked at her sister. “You are pale, Jane. I think it must be my fault. I hope I can somehow make amends.”

  She looked round, seeing her uncle standing just inside the drawing room. He moved forward, his face stern.

  Elizabeth reached out and caught his arm as he went past. “He has been very good to me, Uncle Gardiner,” she said softly. “Very, very good. I — I could not bear it if you are angry with him for what was my omission.”

  He checked and looked at her, his face softening. “I am glad to hear it, Lizzy.” But he was still unsmiling as he approached William.

  “Please excuse me a moment, Jane.” Elizabeth turned and went back to her husband, slipping her hand back into his arm. William looked down at her, his eyes warm at her tacit support. Then he turned and bowed to her uncle.

  “Good morning, sir.”

  Uncle Gardiner bowed back. “Mr. Darcy.” He smiled slightly, the smile strained. “I wonder … I have some very fine whisky in my library. Perhaps you’d care to join me and we may let the ladies have a little privacy?”

  Elizabeth felt uneasy on her husband’s behalf, but he turned to her and lifted her hand to his lips. “I think you will enjoy time with your sister and your aunt, Elizabeth. I will not be far away.” He turned to her uncle.

  “I would be honoured, sir.”

  She watched anxiously as the two men went to the library. But Aunt Gardiner tucked her hand into Elizabeth’s arm. “Come, Lizzy. Let’s go through and have some tea. You must not worry, your uncle has seen you look well, so he will not give Mr. Darcy cause for concern.” She smiled. “Even though I must say he was quite prepared to, if you had not appeared so happy.”

  Chapter 58

  Jane tucked her hand in Elizabeth’s other arm. “Yes, come through and talk to us, Lizzy. I want to know everything that has happened. Everything. I have been so worried.”

  Elizabeth cast a nervous look backwards, but allowed herself to be led through to the drawing room. How long it seemed since she had been here last. She remembered leaving this house that afternoon, leaving before the wedding breakfast had properly begun, certain she would never return.

  Yet — here she was. The room seemed unchanged, but how different she herself was.

  Jane pulled her down beside her onto the sofa, keeping her hand firmly in Elizabeth’s arm and Aunt Gardiner sat in the nearest chair, leaning forward to be as close as possible. Tears stung behind Elizabeth’s eyes. She had missed them so much.

  “You were so angry with us,” her aunt said. “But I’m very glad you seem to be able to forgive us now. Please assure me that you are truly well and happy.”

  Elizabeth looked down, pleating her gown between her hands. “I am, thank you.”

  Her aunt reached out. “When we didn’t hear from you, any of us, we didn’t know what to do. I know your father wrote to Mr. Darcy and received no news of you, only a reminder that you were now his responsibility.” She looked saddened.

  “Then there was nothing at all, until you wrote to your father, saying that you were seeking an annulment and didn’t know where you would be living.” She drew breath. “Lizzy, you sounded so unhappy. Please tell me that you are not leaving and going elsewhere, that you are happier now.”

  Elizabeth grimaced. “I did not know you had seen that letter.” She looked down. “It was very difficult. Mr. Darcy had taken me to Pemberley and returned to London. It seemed that we could never resolve our difficulties while living apart and I gradually discovered from the staff how much he had lost, for he loves Pemberley so very much.”

  Jane’s hand tightened against Elizabeth’s arm. “It was very wrong of him to leave you like that!”

  Elizabeth turned to her. “No, I do not blame him for it, Jane, and you must not, either. We both needed to think about what to do, because neither of us had ever wanted to be in such a situation.”

  Aunt Gardiner patted her knee. “But it seems things are better now?”

  Elizabeth smiled. “Indeed they are. I decided I must go to London and confront Mr. Darcy and at the same time he had decided that we must discuss together the resolution to our difficulties. Our paths crossed in Leicester, and we returned to Pemberley to arrange a mutually satisfying solution.”

  She hesitated — perhaps it would be best not to mention his family’s attempt to have her committed — and she sighed. “I asked for an annulment, he suggested I remain his wife but in a separate household elsewhere — perhaps in Bath.”

  She stopped talking as several maids carried in heavy trays of tea and pastries.

  “Oh, I will be glad for some tea!” She didn’t want to say more, didn’t want to describe the love between them. It was theirs and theirs alone.

  There was silence as they began their tea. Elizabeth knew they were waiting for her to continue, but she stayed silent.

  Finally her aunt spoke. “So, are you going to Bath? I confess I am puzzled, because the letter you wrote, asking me to invite Jane to London without saying why, that letter was addressed from Pitlochry.” She rubbed her forehead. “I must say, I assumed you were with Mr. Darcy and were taking a tour of Scotland. I knew how much you would have enjoyed that, and I was happy for you.”

  Elizabeth smiled wryly. “You may be happy for us, Aunt. I was with Mr. Darcy, we were taking a tour of Scotland, and I did enjoy it very much.”

  She took a deep breath. “Mr. Darcy did try to encourage me to seek a reconciliation, and I must confess it is my fault that I did not. The longer I had left it, the harder it seemed to make the first move. But then we got a letter …” She gave a slight laugh. “And it seemed more urgent. I needed to tell you, Jane. But I still cannot countenance contacting Mama and I knew if I wrote to you at Longbourn, that she would insist on seeing the letter.”

  She turned to her aunt. “Thank you for inviting Jane. I knew you would do as I asked, even if I could not explain it then.”

  “But what letter did you receive that you needed to tell me about, Lizzy?” Jane looked puzzled.

  Elizabeth made a face. “I confess I was so agitated about coming here today that I quite forgot to ask William to bring the letter with him.” She glanced towards the door. “But perhaps he remembered.” She turned back to her sister. “I thought perhaps I could just tell you about it, but now I think it might be better if you read it.”

  She took a deep breath. “Perhaps you could come to dinner, now we have had the first meeting. Aunt, would you and Uncle agree to come to Darcy House with Jane? Perhaps tomorrow? Then I can show you the letter and we can continue catching up on our news.”

  Her aunt smiled at her. “If you would like that, Lizzy, then …”

  She broke off as the door opened and Uncle Gardiner entered, with William. Both men were smiling and Elizabeth felt great relief.

  Aunt Gardiner called for fresh tea, and there was a short period of light conversation.

  Then William looked at her. “I think we need to take our leave now, Elizabeth.” He didn’t try and make excuses, or give a reason, but she was very glad he had said it.

  “I agree.” She smiled at him and rose to her feet. “I have invited Jane and my aunt and uncle for dinner tomorrow night
.” She turned to her aunt.

  “I do hope that you will be able to come.”

  Chapter 59

  In the coach going back to Darcy House Elizabeth had seemed pleased with how their visit had gone. But Darcy had called the visit to an end, seeing how pale she was when he entered the Gardiner’s drawing room.

  She pleaded tiredness when they got home and retired to her bedchamber to rest, begging Georgiana’s forgiveness for her unsociability.

  Darcy was left standing at the bottom of the stairs, uneasily looking up as she retired. Georgiana tucked her hand in his arm.

  “Come to the drawing room, William. Don’t let her look back and see you so concerned, or she will feel she has to struggle on instead of resting when she needs to.”

  He turned away after a final glance. Georgiana’s words made sense to him, although he was concerned for her. “I hope she is not unwell.”

  “I hope so, too. But if she is, she will need to rest and not try to pretend she is well.”

  “You are right, Georgiana. But I am surprised she seems so tired.”

  “Come and sit with me while I play for you a little.” His sister led him over to the pianoforte. “I think she was perhaps more anxious than we thought. But now that the first meeting is over, she will be more comfortable.”

  “Yes.” Darcy glanced at the door. “Perhaps I should have encouraged her to invite them to dinner next week, rather than tomorrow.”

  “I’m sure she will be refreshed tomorrow.” Georgiana indicated the chair beside the instrument and sat herself on the stool.

  Soon, he relaxed back in the chair as Georgiana played a series of sonatas for him. Perhaps he would go up to her bedchamber shortly — before lunch, and see if she was all right.

  He smiled slightly. Mr. Gardiner had not known quite how to talk to him. He had poured him a whisky and they had sat in the great leather chairs before the fire.

  Darcy had been a little distracted, wondering how Elizabeth was faring across the hall in the drawing room, and Gardiner had been equally so, perhaps wondering how to begin the conversation.

  Eventually, he had spoken. “I must thank you for bringing Lizzy here to see us, Mr. Darcy. But I also wanted to say how very difficult we have found the last months with no news of her at all.”

  Darcy had shrugged. “I can understand that, Mr. Gardiner. But it was entirely up to Elizabeth when she wished to reconcile with the family. She was, as you know, very angry at the position she found herself in. No letters were kept from her, but in the early days she burned them unread. I know she then started to read them, but I do not know if she kept them, or burned them later.”

  “You could, perhaps, have replied to the letters you were sent.” Gardiner was quite blunt.

  “I could.” Darcy was equally direct. “Are you aware what was in the letters sent to me, almost daily, by Mrs. Bennet?”

  Gardiner winced slightly. “I am afraid I can imagine.”

  “Yes.” Darcy drained his whisky. “I thought that once I answered even one, that she might take that as the invitation she was demanding, and appear at Pemberley. It is for Elizabeth, and Elizabeth only, to decide who she will and will not — yet — see.”

  Gardiner raised his eyebrows. “Yet?”

  Darcy nodded. “I know a lady needs her mother whenever that is possible, and I would wish for a reconciliation at some point, for her sake. But you cannot expect me to welcome it, or put pressure on Elizabeth before she feels herself ready for it.”

  “No, I suppose not.” Gardiner sounded grudgingly respectful and gazed into his empty glass, before getting to his feet and refilling both glasses.

  “Well, perhaps you have business to attend to. You might leave Lizzy with us for the day, and I will ensure she is escorted home safely.” He smiled. “Jane and my wife have a great deal of catching up to do.”

  Darcy took his refilled glass. “Thank you for the offer, Mr. Gardiner, but at this moment, Elizabeth will not be happy with that. I have promised to stay with her until I can assure her security, and I hope to do that very soon. Then I am sure she will be happy to spend more time here.”

  Gardiner’s voice sharpened. “Security?”

  Darcy had nodded, and explained the actions of his uncle and Lady Catherine. “I now have evidence, and a few signed depositions. I will be confronting my uncle tomorrow, and my aunt a few days later. Then Elizabeth will be safe. Until then, I will keep my promise to her.”

  Gardiner had stared angrily into his glass. “I cannot believe that of your family, Darcy! How could they think such a thing?”

  Darcy shrugged. He supposed the man had reason to be so imprudent, but it was hardly gentlemanly. “Well, I had not told them of my obligation, or undoubtedly something may have happened before I was in a position to protect Elizabeth.” He rose to his feet. “Thank you for your hospitality, sir. I think it would be politic to rejoin the ladies.”

  He was drawn back into the present as Georgiana called his name.

  “Are you well, William? You are scowling so. Was your meeting with the family very difficult?”

  Darcy shook his head. “I’m sorry. It was about what I had expected, but I should not dwell on it.” He smiled. “Your music was very relaxing.”

  He glanced at the clock. “I will go up to Elizabeth before lunch and see how she is.”

  Chapter 60

  The following day, Elizabeth wandered around the great public rooms, trying to see if anything was amiss before her family arrived.

  “Everything is perfect, Elizabeth.” Georgiana’s amused voice from the doorway made Elizabeth turn and smile at her.

  “Thank you, Georgiana, I can see it is. Let’s go through to the drawing room and you might distract me until they arrive.” Elizabeth tucked her arm in Georgiana’s and they walked through to the drawing room, discovering Richard sitting by the fire.

  “Richard! I didn’t know you were in here.” Georgiana looked surprised. “How long have you been sitting alone?”

  He laughed. “Not long, dear cousin. I have been talking to Darcy in the library. He is just finishing his letter and then he will be joining us.”

  Elizabeth looked towards the door. How she wished she could just go to the library and see William in the same way she had always gone to her father’s book room.

  She frowned slightly. Would he mind if she did that? Perhaps she had better ask him later, rather than surprise him now.

  She turned back to Georgiana and Richard, smiling as she sat down with them.

  “So,” Georgiana said, turning towards her. “Tell us a little more of your family before they arrive.”

  Elizabeth smiled. “Well, let me see …”

  She was listening for the great front door to open when William joined them. “I think I heard the sound of a coach outside, Elizabeth, so you have not much longer to wait.” He was smiling at her excitement, mixed with nerves.

  She rose to her feet, nervously smoothing the skirt of her gown. “I will go through and meet them.”

  He offered his arm. “I will come with you.”

  They greeted their guests in the hall and Elizabeth slipped her arm into Jane’s.

  “Come and meet William’s sister.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “She is very shy and nervous, so I hope you will forgive her if she is quiet.”

  Jane leaned her head towards her. “I’m Jane, remember, not Lydia.”

  Elizabeth laughed. She was so happy she seemed to be back as before with Jane and their normal banter.

  She could feel the comforting reassurance of her husband behind her as he walked with her aunt and uncle. She was so fortunate. What if he had never found her in the woods? She could not imagine her life being any better for her than it was now.

  The conversation was easy and relaxed. Elizabeth watched her family talking to Richard and Georgiana without any apparent apprehension or uneasiness.

  William and Richard were talking of fishing with Uncle Gardiner and Geor
giana was fully engaged with her aunt, who was kindly drawing her confidence.

  Jane smiled serenely at her. “Oh, Lizzy, it is so good to see you here, so obviously happy and accepted. It is a dream come true for me.” She looked a little troubled. “I just wish I could tell Mama. When will you write to her — or even Papa?”

  Elizabeth made a face. “I will talk to William about how, perhaps, I might write to Papa without having to see Mama again.” Her thoughts were troubled. “Jane, you were not there to see how she behaved to William — after what she had done to him. I am finding it hard to know how I could ever forgive her.”

  Jane put her hand on Elizabeth’s. “But what does Mr. Darcy say? Surely he would not forbid you from writing to Mama?”

  Elizabeth shook her head. “No, he would not. Indeed, he has been encouraging me to do so. The determination is mine and I will have to think on it.”

  Jane looked as if she was about to say something else, but the doors to the drawing room opened, and the butler looked at Mr. Darcy.

  William looked startled, and glanced at Elizabeth before excusing himself.

  “Please excuse me a moment, Jane.” Elizabeth rose and joined her husband at the doorway. William was frowning and lowered his head towards her.

  “It appears Bingley and his sisters have invited themselves to dinner. It has been a habit of theirs which I have welcomed in the past. I had not thought to tell him to now refrain,” he murmured, looking disturbed.

  Elizabeth raised her head, a bright smile on her face. “If this is a regular occurrence then I am sure the kitchen will have made suitable preparations. Let us go and greet them.”

  “Bingley’s sisters are not as amiable as he, Elizabeth. Be careful.” His whisper was almost inaudible as they went right into the hall.

  She saw a young man, little older than Jane, his eyes merry and a face which seemed to habitually smile, and she could not help smiling in return. Slightly behind him were two elegant ladies, both with discontented expressions on their faces, and an older man, who looked as if he would rather be already dining.